Authors: Anna Patricio
I smiled at her. "I am pleased to meet you, Nafre."
She smiled back, though she didn't say anything. She reminded me of the twins, quiet and pleasant. I was confident we would get along.
Satsepdu instructed Nafre to prepare my bath. After she left, my new parents and I talked a bit more. Soon, I could not resist a yawn.
Pentephres chuckled. "We ought to let you rest now. Nafre will be in an adjoining room should you need anything. But do feel free to have her wake us up as well if you must."
We rose. They came over and embraced me.
"It is so good to have you here finally," Satsepdu murmured into my hair.
"Sleep well, daughter," Pentephres said. "We will see you tomorrow."
Later, I lay on my enormous bed of blue silk. I stared up at the ceiling. I was tired, but could not fall asleep.
Something was amiss.
Then, I realised—the silence was deafening.
And something more. But I could not figure out what.
My thoughts were jumbled. Everything had happened too fast and too abruptly. I was grateful for Pentephres' and Satsepdu's kindness, but I was befuddled about everything.
I clasped the lapis lazuli lotus close to my chest. Then I realised something. I could never again return to the fishing village. I still treasured my memories of it. It would always be a part of me. But for all practical and emotional reasons, I could not go back. I belonged in Heliopolis now.
I remembered Menah telling me that if Mama and Papa could see me now they would be happy. He was probably right. After all, as the daughter of the powerful high priest, I would be well taken care of. I had a bright future ahead of me.
And now I had to do my part. I had to emerge from the sorrows of the past. Then something good would happen.
As for losing my friends, well, I had faith Menah and I would never lose touch. We had been together for so long. Perhaps he would change his mind and return to Heliopolis.
Feeling more optimistic, I shifted on the silken cushion and smiled. My first parents could now rest in peace.
I awoke the next morning to a haze of pale blues. For a moment, I wondered at the softness beneath me. Then the events of the previous day came crashing back to me.
It had to be a strange dream.
Nafre bustled around, arranging some things. She caught sight of me and hurried over. "Good morning, my lady. Would you like some breakfast?"
I was still in a daze. "Yes. I mean, yes please."
"Your mother is inviting you to join her in the garden. However, she says you may also breakfast alone if you wish."
For a moment, I thought Nafre was referring to my first mother. Sadness welled up in me.
But I quickly shoved it aside. I could not be moping and depressed on the first day of my new life. Mama and Papa would not have wanted it either.
"I'll join her." I climbed out of bed.
I had no idea what I was going to wear. Nafre showed me my wardrobe, which was more convoluted than I thought. The clothes were divided into categories. There was "formal wear," "ceremonial temple garb," "semi-formal wear," "casual dressy," "casual outdoor," "casual indoor" and so much more.
To me, there was no difference between the beautiful clothes. Finally, I settled on a sky blue sheath dress because I liked its colour. Nafre informed me it was one of the "dressier" types.
Outside, Nafre led me toward a fork of tree-lined paths. She told me that one path led to the garden, the other to the family chapel.
We headed down the path on the right. An arch covered in vines rose up before us. Twin bird baths shaped like lotuses stood at the sides. I smiled to see three birds frolicking in one of them.
Beneath the arch, Pentephres and Satsepdu's garden sprawled out before me. I was enchanted. It was more beautiful than the temple garden. The blooms and greenery here were richer, more lush. They seemed to reach out and embrace me as I entered.
Two reflecting pools lay on opposite ends of the grounds. Fountains splashed and tinkled. Beds of cornflowers, poppies and daisies lined sandy walkways. The singing of the birds floated down from the trees.
Nafre led toward a marble pavilion. There, Lady Satsepdu sat before a low table laden with a sumptuous feast.
She smiled. "Good morning, Asenath. I trust you slept well?"
I stared blankly at her for a moment. Then I remembered I had a new name now. A new name and a new life, just as Menah had said.
I bowed. "Life, health and prosperity to you, my lady. Yes, I did."
Satsepdu sighed. "There is no need for formality. We are family now, remember? Call me Mother."
"Yes, my la―"
She gave me a look.
"Mother."
Upon uttering the last word, I was sure Re and all the gods would strike me dead.
Mother smiled. She beckoned for me to sit. "Your father is at the temple. But he will be here later this afternoon to introduce you to your tutors."
After breakfast, Mother showed me more of the house. One of the garden pools, she said, had been converted into a swimming pool for me. A screen had been constructed over it so that I could swim even in the heat of the day.
I realised it had been such a long time since I last swam.
Later Mother took me up to the roof deck. She pointed into the distance. "Look over there."
I shaded my eyes and gasped. "Are those the pyramids?"
"They are indeed. You know, I believe you have a view of them from your room as well."
We went to look. Sure enough, I had my own private view of the ancient tombs. But the view from the roof deck was much better.
As with all new beginnings, the first months of my noblewoman's life started out simple. However, it did not feel that way at the time.
My early days consisted of studying and serving at the temple. In my leisure time, I swam in the garden pool and devoured the scrolls in the library. I was so grateful Father had taught me how to read.
Just as I thought I had fully adapted to my new life, my parents introduced another item to the agenda—the gatherings of high society.
I knew it was inevitable, especially as it was often mentioned. Still, I felt it was happening all too soon.
As if he read my mind Father said, "But not to worry, Asenath. This will be a casual affair. It will be a river hunt outside the city. However, Pharaoh will be there. So do remember to put your best foot forward."
"Yes, Father."
"If I recall correctly, some other people your age will be coming too. So you should be able to enjoy it." He smiled.
I cheered up, imagining I would meet people like Menah. "Yes, I am sure I will."
As my parents and I travelled toward the riverbanks, I readied myself to make a good impression. My nervousness eased a bit when the Nile's sparkling dark green waters came into view. They reminded me of my childhood. I smiled to myself.
But then I heard the distant sounds of merrymaking. My chest constricted.
Soon, we arrived. I took a deep breath before disembarking my litter.
A huge crowd was already gathered at the site. Fleets of opulent barques crowded the river's surface. Skippers scurried back and forth, readying the boats for the hunt.
Father took my arm. "There's Pharaoh and the Queen. Come."
I put on my practised smile. As we reached the royal couple, we bowed.
Father said, "Your Majesties, please allow me to present to you my daughter, the Lady Asenath."
"
Ankh, weneb, sedjet
," I said. "O Living Horus and Great Royal Wife."
The Queen turned and went off with a group of royal ladies.
I stared in bafflement. Then I remembered myself. "O Living Horus, may you live forever."
"Lord Pentephres, we have much to discuss." Pharaoh nodded to Father.
The king had barely looked at me the entire time. The two men began talking. I excused myself and wandered around.
Near the riverbank, I saw a group of people who looked my age. They must have been the ones Father mentioned to me about. My spirits lifted.
I approached them with a bright smile. "Hello.
Em hotep
—in peace. I am Lady Asenath."
They stared at me for a moment. Then they turned their backs on me and walked away.
I froze. I felt as if I had been punched in the stomach.
I had not been told what to do if something like this happened. I had not even expected it.
I wandered around a bit more. But I did not know who I could possibly approach. I felt if I did, I would just be interfering.
The rest of the day went by in a blur. I do not even remember how the hunt went.
One morning, I awoke to a strange heaviness. At first, I thought it was just some momentary thing. But as the days passed by, the peculiar weight remained.
Then I realised for the first time I felt truly alone.
Until then, I always had a friend and companion by my side. Even during my captivity, I never felt truly desolate because Mekten was with me. But now, I was on my own.
I did not want to be ungrateful. I knew there were hundreds, no, thousands of people who wished to be in my place. And why not?
I lived a privileged life as a member of Heliopolis' most powerful family. I resided in a sprawling villa with a garden, a library, a pool, my own bedroom and an army of servants to do my bidding. Wherever I went, people bowed and greeted me with the utmost respect. Father had once said I was almost a princess.
But I could not help this loneliness.
Even worse, I had stopped hearing from Menah. At first, he wrote as he said he would. He was quite slack, but I did not mind. I was just happy to hear from him.
But one day, I realised it had been a while since his last letter. I sent him a second letter, asking if he had received my previous one. I got no reply.
I bade time then sent a third one. It also went unanswered. After that, I decided to leave it up to him. I had already done more than enough on my part.
I might have talked with Pentephres and Satsepdu about these feelings. After all, they had turned out to be the kind and loving parents they had promised to be. I, too, had come to love them in return.
But I knew if I mentioned this to them, I would appear ungrateful. It was probably even wrong of me to have these feelings. So I bottled everything up and faked a smile, even though I was slowly dying inside.
One day, at a party, I once again met the group of young people who had snubbed me at the hunt. One of the girls said something while looking straight at me. Afterward, they turned to me with a sneer.
I was very uncomfortable. But I knew the best thing to do was ignore them.
"The stench of fish," the girl said. "How I detest it so." She made a rude noise.
"Be careful not to get too close to her," her friend said. "You might catch one of her dirty peasant diseases."
"You do know she was in captivity at one stage," another said. "No doubt she contracted something when one of those savages forced themselves upon her."
They laughed.
"That is disgusting."
"You see how she is the height of a man? She could pass for one of those savage women. I hear they are as enormous as she is."
The first girl said, "Look at that pathetic excuse for a necklace she's always wearing. No doubt she made it from one of her smelly fishing nets."
That last one, I would
not
tolerate. I took a bold step toward the group.
They backed away in unison.
I looked the evil girl straight in the eye. "This is a gift from my mother."
I briefly touched the precious lotus.
She snorted. "You don't mean Lady Satsepdu, do you? Don't forget where you're from, fishing village girl. Your
real
parents are peasants, worth no more than livestock."
I could not take it anymore. I lunged toward her and shoved her. One of her male companions delivered a hard blow to me.
I fell to the ground. The world became a blur, though I was aware of shouts erupting above me.
Gentle hands lifted me up.
"Come, Asenath," said Father's soft voice. "We are going home."
I did not come out of my room for two weeks. I knew I had disgraced my family in the worst way possible. But that did not matter. Nothing mattered anymore.
Belonging to Neith. What a joke! There was no sacred protection of the goddess. There was no hope, no happiness, no future. Only pain.
What a fool I had been to think a bright new world had opened up for me. No matter where I went, no matter what I was―whether I was a peasant, a temple servant or a noblewoman―everything would always end tragically.
One day, my parents came into the room. I had just awoken from another dreamless sleep. I turned my back on them, unable to face them.
Mother placed a tender hand on my arm. "Asenath, how are you feeling?"
I looked at her, unable to speak.
She sat on the edge of my bed. "Are you all right, love?"
Father appeared beside her. "Daughter, I am so sorry about what happened. I heard what those people said to you. If it will make you feel any better, I happen to know that their parents are no better. In fact, those families have rather vile reputations."
"Do not allow them to destroy your life," Mother said. "You have so much to live for."
I snorted.
"You have come such a long way," Father said. "We are very proud of you. You don't want to throw everything away just because of a few jealous brats."
Mother gently tugged my arm. "Come now. Let me help you out of bed."
I whimpered. "But if I go back out there, they'll try to hurt me again. Please, just send me away."
Mother's grip on me tightened.
"No, Asenath," Father said. "We will not do that. We have waited so long for you."
"Yes," Mother said. "Come now. We will help you through this."
I had no doubt my parents were sincere. But I was now scared of the world. I pulled the blanket over my head.
Mother gently drew it back.
"Please, Asenath. Let me help you out of bed. Come now, love, please."
"It will be fine, daughter," Father said. "You will see. Come now." He extended his hand to me.