Atonement (16 page)

“
Vesta
is not coming back to the Confederacy?”

“We're not going to solve this through force of arms. We're outnumbered, outgunned, and unable to completely trust any of the other players on the field. We will do what we can to assist Lsia until we are able to either separate her from our hologram and the others from the bodies they have taken, or determined that to do so is impossible. Once that's done, so is our work here.”

“If that's how you really feel, Admiral,” Chakotay said, “why don't we simply ask the Confederacy to turn the Seriareen over to our custody and leave as soon as
Voyager
is repaired?”

Janeway turned to him. “I did. They intend to execute them, which strikes me as dangerous and short-sighted.”

“Dangerous?” Cambridge asked.

“The Neyser told you that these entities were immortal, and
Lsia confirmed it. We may kill the bodies of their current hosts, or destroy Lsia's holographic generator, but the essences would simply attack the nearest available host and pick up where they left off,” Janeway replied.

“Could we transport them into the middle of a singularity and take our chances?” Cambridge asked.

“Even if that would work, their current hosts are innocent,” Janeway argued.

“You don't know that,” Chakotay said. “Maybe they agreed to become hosts.”

“I
saw
Kashyk,” Janeway admitted. “At least I think I did. I believe he's still in there and still fighting.”

“And still the Federation's enemy unless I missed a memo,” Cambridge said.

“Yes, but we don't
execute
our enemies,” Janeway replied.

“Unlike the Confederacy,” Chakotay said. “You haven't heard my report on Lecahn yet, Admiral.”

“It didn't go well?” Janeway guessed.

“The Seriareen aren't the only ones out here who don't seem to struggle with cold-blooded murder.”

Janeway began to massage her forehead. “What happened?”

“We came under attack by a group called the Unmarked. They're from the planet Grysyen, a member of the Confederacy that seems to have some valid and disturbing issues with the central government. I captured the crew of one vessel that made a suicide run on
Voyager.
I interrogated them briefly and advised Mattings that I would release them to his custody if he would assure me that they would be able to air their grievances and receive a fair trial. He recaptured them and executed them on the spot. The CIF calls them terrorists. I call them . . .”

“Maquis?” Cambridge asked.

Chakotay shook his head. “To hear them tell it, they are citizens of the Confederacy that tried to work through proper channels and are now being mercilessly oppressed. I'm not sure who is in the right, but the general's choice solved nothing.”

Silence descended for a few moments. Finally, Janeway said, “I
am under no illusion that the Federation will be able to form an alliance with the Confederacy anytime in the foreseeable future.”

“Then we should move on,” Chakotay argued. “We're wasting time and resources here better spent continuing our investigations of the rest of the Delta Quadrant.”

“
Voyager
can't fly right now and
Demeter
is AWOL,” Janeway reminded him. “And I gave my word to Lsia that I would help her.”

“You said whatever you needed to in order to survive while you were their prisoner. No one is going to hold you to that now.”

“The Confederacy might,” Janeway noted.

Chakotay shrugged. “So we need to buy ourselves a little time. We can keep up the pretense of good faith negotiations for a few days, devise a means to hold Lsia and the others, capture them if we must, and be on our way.”

Janeway considered the proposition, but shook her head. “No,” she said simply.

“Due respect, Admiral, why not?” Chakotay asked. “None of these people are our friends or allies. They've demonstrated varying levels of barbarity and deception from day one. We're not here to bring peace to the Delta Quadrant. We're here to explore. We've investigated the potential for an alliance and found it to be impossible. We are responsible for ending any threat the Seriareen pose, and this is the best way to do that without further conflict.”

“Do we embrace deception?” Janeway asked.

“We prioritize
our
safety and
our
needs,” Chakotay clarified.

Janeway looked to the others. “Thoughts?” she asked. “Speak freely.”

“I'm with Chakotay on this one,” Cambridge said quickly. “We did everything in our power to find common ground with the Confederacy. Our fleet is too small to take on the CIF should they refuse to release the Seriareen. If we have to embellish the truth to get what we need, so be it.”

Glenn asked, “Are
you absolutely certain, Admiral, that no exchange of technology between us and the Confederacy will be possible?”

“I fear not,” Janeway replied.

Glenn nodded somberly. Chakotay did not know what the young commander might have been hoping for but she quickly resolved herself to reality. “It's entirely possible that in the time it will take to repair
Voyager
we'll know
Demeter
's status. Once that's settled, I agree, we should move on,” she finally said.

Janeway turned to Farkas. “Captain?”

Farkas clasped her hands and brought them to her lips, her elbows resting on the table. She looked past Janeway, lost in thought for a few moments, then said, “I see your point, Captain Chakotay, and a couple of days ago, I tried to make a similar case. But not now. This isn't just about who the Confederacy has shown themselves to be, or the depravity of the Seriareen. It's about who we are. Admiral Janeway spent the day staring down the business end of a disruptor and still managed to destroy the
Kinara
's alliance simply by telling the truth. She asked everyone in earshot to open themselves up to the possibility that by working together, we could find a way through this that might be acceptable to all parties concerned. That took strength, character, and courage. The admiral stood there and made a case for the values that lie at the heart of our Federation and the principles we all agreed to uphold when we joined Starfleet. If we run now, we may survive, but who are we? When the Confederacy tells others about us, what will they say? Will they remember us as technologically advanced liars? Will they encourage others to trust us?

“
Voyager
made a lot of hard choices the first time she was out here. We're here to correct misconceptions, not create new ones.

“If we're going to go down, I'd prefer we do it fighting the right battle. I know this isn't the one we came looking for, but it's found us. We're in too deep to pretend our responsibilities are as cut-and-dried as you're suggesting. I don't know what it will cost us if we stay. But the admiral gave her word. And I'm not comfortable advising her to betray it or to negotiate in bad faith.”

Janeway smiled faintly. “There is no question we must proceed cautiously. I will consider all you have said. Until then, we focus on our immediate concerns.”

When no one raised further objections, Janeway dismissed Glenn and Farkas and asked Chakotay and the Counselor to remain behind.

•   •   •   •   •

After spending a few moments speaking privately to Counselor Cambridge, Janeway dismissed him and turned toward Chakotay. He had risen from the table and stood staring out the briefing room's long port at the numerous CIF vessels now patrolling the area.

“Chakotay.”

He turned, but did not move to her. “Are you planning to resume your counseling sessions with Hugh?” he asked.

Janeway paused, wondering at his accusatory tone.

“Now that you mention it, that probably wouldn't be the worst idea. But I needed to speak with him now about the Doctor.”

“How is he?”

“It's complicated,” she replied. “Barclay is working on it. I want him to bring Counselor Cambridge in to assist him as soon as the Doctor is ready.”

“Why?”

“There's only so much Reg can fix. Some of it, the Doctor needs to work through the old-fashioned way.”

Chakotay waited for her to continue. Finally, he said, “You're still not going to tell me what's really going on with the Doctor.”

“This isn't about us, Chakotay. Please don't take my silence as evidence of a lack of trust. To share more than I have might be embarrassing to the Doctor. I respect him too much for that. At some point, when he's had a chance to find some peace, he may be willing to discuss it with you. I will encourage him to do so. But I won't betray his confidence.”

“Okay,” Chakotay said. “Is there anything else?”

He might not have intended that question to sting, but it did.

“It's been quite a day,” she managed. “I thought we should
take a few minutes to talk. Obviously, we both have a lot on our plates, so if you'd rather not . . .”

Chakotay shook his head. “Of course I . . .” he began, then paused, searching for the right words. “I don't understand your insistence on
helping
Lsia. Are you more worried about our technology, or about Kashyk?”

“I beg your pardon.”

“I know you were fond of him. I know how much his betrayal hurt you. But not every soul you encounter is yours to save. Even if you can separate him from the Seriareen now wearing his face, do you honestly believe he wouldn't try to kill you, the first chance you gave him?”

“That isn't the point. The Seriareen are a new life-form. We've never come across anything like them. It is our duty to learn all we can about them. And who is to say that assisting them now with the Confederacy might not lead us to a better solution than simply tossing them out an airlock or watching General Mattings do it for us.”

“They tried to kill you, Kathryn. I had to stand by helpless and watch, hoping you knew what you were doing.”

“They were trying to use me to drive a wedge between the Federation and the Confederacy.”

“And if it hadn't meant losing you, that wouldn't bother me. You know an alliance is impossible, but part of you still wants it, don't you? Are you trying to prove something to Command or just hoping that the writing on the wall is going to change?”

“What's wrong with you?” she demanded. “I appreciate what you've been through, but you're out of line.”

“Where's the line, Kathryn? I'll follow your orders. I always have. But I won't stand here and watch you throw away our lives in the name of pride. What was I supposed to think when you turned yourself over to be executed without so much as a backward glance?”

Janeway took a few breaths to calm herself before responding. “I don't think I'll ever know how much of my choice to turn myself over to the
Kinara
came from a sense of duty to the fleet,
or the existential horror I felt seeing
Voyager
seconds away from annihilation when I knew I had the power to stop it.”

“You ordered us into battle, Admiral. Don't do it again, unless you're prepared to live with any outcome.”

Janeway shook her head in disbelief. “I thought you understood how this has to be. I decided once that loving you while serving as your commanding officer was too much to risk. You convinced me I was wrong. This was a bad day. But we're going to have those from time to time. If we can't accept them and move on, this isn't going to work.”

“You keep saying that. You keep questioning this choice we've both made. And just when I think we've settled the issue, you pull back again. You're right.
That isn't going to work.

“If you want me to support your decision to put this fleet at a greater risk than I believe is necessary or wise, you need to give me more than platitudes about duty and honor. I need to know in my bones that you are as committed as I am to keeping our people safe. Your insistence on aiding Lsia and continuing to court the goodwill of the Confederacy smacks of recklessness. We don't need to prove anything to them. They have been weighed, measured, and found wanting.”

“What if Lsia is telling the truth?”

“I don't care. She could have asked us for help the first day we met her. Had she done so, we would have done whatever we could to assist her. But she didn't. Instead, she spent months building a fleet big enough to destroy us and to force her way into the sovereign territory of the Confederacy. What do you think she intends to do if she finds her homeworld?”

“I don't know,” Janeway admitted. “I asked you to stay because when I go to speak with her in a few hours, I wanted you to come with me. When that conversation is over, I'll have to make a decision. I wanted your input, but I felt it might be more constructive if it was informed by your direct impressions.”

Chakotay paused, clearly surprised. “Oh.”

“I'll advise you when I'm to depart,” Janeway said, turning to go.

“Kathryn.”

“I'll
be transferring to
Voyager
when
Vesta
is clear to leave. Please ask Lieutenant Kim to prepare quarters for me,” she added before continuing out the door.

INDIANA

I
t was the middle of the night, local time, when Seven arrived at the end of a long dirt road that led to Gretchen Janeway's home. Prior to her departure from the fleet, Admiral Janeway had told Seven that if she needed anything, she should contact her mother. The two women had met several times during Seven's years on Earth, the last at Admiral Janeway's memorial service.

Even with the invitation, Seven could not conscience rousing Gretchen from her sleep. She had no intention of availing herself of Gretchen's generous hospitality for several hours and chose to turn off the road well before it reached the large house that rested on the southern edge of the vast property.