Attraction: (A Temptation Series Stand-alone) (The Temptation Series Book 4) (34 page)

He went to grab me and lead me back into his embrace, but I
stepped away and covered my mouth with my hand before speaking. ‘What we have
isn’t love, Derek. And that display with Nurse Slapper just proved it. I’ll
wait outside,’ I said with disappointment, and turned to leave.

He grabbed my hand and pulled me to him, wincing when I
slammed into his hard frame. ‘Clearly, throwing myself in front of a car to
save Sasha wasn’t verification enough for you, huh?’

I closed my eyes, breathed in and then lowered my head to
his chest, hugging him gently. ‘Thank you. What you did was heroic and I will
be forever grateful, but ...’ I said raising my head and releasing myself from
his hold, ‘... an act of kindness is not necessarily an act of love.’

Turning to leave for the final time, I stopped when he
murmured my name. ‘Carly, you want proof. You’ll get it.’

CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE

Derek’s shoulder was reset and, as far as I knew, was
healing nicely. He had been relentless with his quest to give me proof and had
even sent me a recording of him singing ‘Someday’ by Nickelback. Hearing his
voice, and the lyrics he chose to sing to me, spurred the emotion I had buried
to rear its ugly head again. I wasn’t sure I wanted him to ‘make it all right’
and I wasn’t sure I wanted him to be relentless in his actions to win me back.
The notion, of course, sounded nice. But winning me back meant that he could
once again break my heart at some future point, and I couldn’t let that happen.
So despite the ache he kindled in my body, I refused to encourage him. And as
much as that hurt, I ignored his attempts at contact.

I must admit that some attempts he made were a lot harder to
ignore than others, like when I nearly tripped over a bottle of mint sauce that
sat upon my front doorstep. I’d picked it up in my confusion and aggravation
and found a note attached to it:
I’m ready when you are. Derek

I had to give credit where credit was due — the mint sauce
whet my appetite. But I had to remain strong, I had to remain smart and I had
to remain free. I’d opted to place the bottle on the outdoor window ledge just
in case he had plans to come back. It was my way of saying that mint sauce was
off the menu for good. Well, off the cock-tasting menu anyway.
Pity.

Oh, and he’d even sent a picture of the cock-moulding kit
sitting on his bedside table with a message, again saying:
I’m ready when
you are. Derek

Seeing that pic had made me laugh, but then again, he’d
always been able to make me laugh. When all was said and done, his actions,
albeit cute and endearing, were far from ‘proving’ his claim that what we had
was more than attraction.

It was now nearly a week since the accident. I’d taken
annual leave from work to look after Sasha. My golden pup had fractured her
ulna and it was tightly secured in a cast. Layla had given strict instructions
for Sasha to rest, and for the first couple of days this request seemed easy
enough to comply with. But Sasha — being an eight-month-old puppy — did not
take kindly to being restricted and was getting her second wind and wanting to
move more freely.

‘Stay!’ I warned, as I stood up from the couch to answer the
door. She went to get up and perform her ritual over-enthusiastic greeting, but
I cautioned her otherwise. ‘Sasha, sit. Stay.’

Quickly opening the door in order to get rid my visitor so
that I could get back to where Sasha was curled up on her bed in our lounge
room, I found myself face to face with Derek. Even after what we’d been
through, his presence still had the ability to steal my breath.

‘Hey,’ he said nervously as he stood there with his arm in a
sling and presenting me with yet another bottle of mint sauce.

‘Hey,’ I answered, just as nervously, accepting the bottle
from him. I leaned out the door and placed it on the window ledge next to the
other bottle.

He let out a long, disappointed breath. ‘You mind if I come
in?’

Knowing I would regret my decision either way, I stood back
and let him enter. He walked straight into my lounge room and dropped to his
knees before a very happy Sasha.

‘Hello, gorgeous girl,’ he said adoringly as he stroked her
golden fur. ‘How’s the patient?’

She rolled to her side, bared her belly and wagged her tail
excitedly. The sight of his attentiveness toward Sasha was simply beautiful. If
it weren’t for him, there was a strong possibility Sasha would not be alive.

Sitting down on the sofa, I smiled at the two of them.
‘She’s doing well. Your sister-in-law is an angel.’

He tutted. ‘Yeah, sometimes.’

Silence encircled us as he stroked Sasha, the invisible barrier
both awkward and soothing.

‘Carly, I’m sorry,’ he said quietly, still patting Sasha. ‘I
fucked up. I know that.’

‘Well, according to Lucy, it wasn’t your secret to tell,’ I
said without so much as a hint of emotion, although my facade was hard to achieve.

He looked up at me. ‘It doesn’t matter what Lucy said. I
should’ve told you. I owed you that much.’

I could see his remorse — it blanketed his expression, but
as much as I wanted to give in and continue our relationship where we’d left
off, I couldn’t bring myself to concede. ‘Yeah, well, it’s too late for that
now.’

Derek shuffled forward, until he was kneeling before me and
could therefore grip my leg with his unrestricted hand. ‘Don’t say that,’ he
pleaded.

‘Derek, I told you that if you broke my heart it would stay
that way, and I meant it.’

‘Baby, let —’

‘Stop calling me baby,’ I interrupted.

Rebellion flashed across his face. ‘Baby, let me fix it.
I’ll fucking fix it.’

‘You can’t,’ I explained, closing my eyes and shaking my
head.

‘Why?’

‘Because I don’t trust you.’

‘You never fucking trusted me,’ he said angrily, as he got
to his feet.

His sudden change of mood took me by surprise. ‘And rightly
so, it seems,’ I replied defensively.

Frustration clearly radiated from him as he began to pace
back and forth while he ran his hand along his head. ‘I offered my sperm to
Luce and Nic so they could start a family. That’s it!’

‘How did the sperm find its way into Lucy’s egg?’ I asked,
with a calm and almost emotionless composure.

He stopped pacing and stared at me in disbelief. I stared
back and summoned all the strength I could, knowing that whatever he said next
was going to hurt. If he denied it, or chose not to answer, it would just
reinforce my inability to trust him. But if he confirmed my suspicion and
admitted to sleeping with Lucy, then the knowledge would sting just as much.

‘I fucked her,’ he said coldly. ‘I fucked her until she was
pregnant.’

‘Well, there you have it,’ I choked, swallowing the lump
that had formed in my throat.

‘Why does it matter?’ he asked beseechingly. ‘You weren’t in
my life back then.’

‘No, I wasn’t. I get that. But tell me, why do I feel
betrayed and deceived if it doesn’t matter? Why does the admission of your and
Lucy’s relationship hurt so fucking much?’

He stepped up to me, leaned down and wiped the tear that had
found its way onto my cheek. ‘Isn’t it obvious? Because you love me.’

‘Loved, Derek,’ I corrected him, wiping the tear for myself.

He shook his head and smiled sadly. ‘Love, Carly.’

‘No. Maybe it was back then for a split second, but not anymore.’

‘Fuck,’ he growled and started pacing again. ‘What do I have
to do to fucking prove it to you?’

‘You can’t,’ I yelled back. ‘You can’t prove something that
is nonexistent.’

‘Tell me what you want, Carly,’ he said, gritting his teeth
as he sat on the sofa next to me. ‘What do you want me to do?’

I shuffled sideways until I was pressed against the arm of
the chair and creating some distance between us. The last thing I wanted was to
be physically close to him, for my body would betray my head. ‘Nothing,’ I said
definitively. ‘I don’t want anything from you anymore.’

Grabbing me with his free hand, he wrenched me to him. ‘Nothing?’
he queried with a bitter sneer as his hand gripped the skin of my arm. ‘Do you
just want to fuck? Is that it? Be fuck buddies.’

I tried to get free of his grip. ‘Derek, stop it.’

‘Do you want to
feel
nothing?’ he asked before
slamming his lips to mine, forcefully plunging his tongue into my mouth and pinning
me to the couch.

The suffocating pressure of his weight, together with the
shock of his desperation and aggressiveness, took a moment to wear off, but
when it did I pushed against him and scrambled free, throwing myself onto the
floor and scooting backward to get away from him. ‘Get out!’ I screamed.

He stared at me in disbelief. ‘Shit, baby, I’m sorry. I
didn’t mean to frighten you. I —’

‘Now! Just go,’ I cried, unable to look at him any longer.

‘Carly, I can’t. I can’t leave you like this. You’re asking
me to do the impossible. Baby, please don’t push me away,’ he pleaded sadly.

I got to my feet and wiped my nose with the back of my hand.
‘If you don’t leave, then I will.’

Derek stood up and moved tentatively toward me. ‘Okay,’ he
said softly, gently grasping my chin and tilting my head so that I would look
him in the eyes. ‘I’m not giving up on us.’ He placed a chaste kiss on my lips,
causing a surge of emotions to envelop me completely. ‘I love you and I know
you love me. We “are” and we always will be.’ He then placed his hand over his
heart and stepped backward until he’d left my house.

When I heard the sound of the front door shutting behind
him, I dropped to my knees and cried, sobs wracking my chest like never before.
Love leads to immeasurable pain.

***

The following week I returned to work, and Derek — in true
Derek form — followed through on his vow and continued his pursuit. The man
never gave up. He sent texts every day, telling me how sorry he was for the way
he acted and for frightening me as a result. He said the look on my face the
last time we were together pierced his heart with a blunt knife. He vowed to
never see that look again.

Honestly, it wasn’t his aggression that had me fearful that
day. It was the desperation he so clearly displayed, his anguish as he tried to
break down my walls. That’s what scared me the most, for I knew in that moment
he would eventually succeed.

On the Monday that I returned to work, I’d found another
bottle of mint sauce on the bonnet of my car, again displaying a message:
Ready
and waiting. Derek

Just like the times before, I placed it on the window ledge,
adding it to my collection which now reminded me of the song ‘99 Bottles of
Beer’.

On the Tuesday afternoon, upon returning from work, I found
yet another bottle in my letterbox, this time the note saying:
When you are
ready, so am I. Derek

His persistence confounded me. It was both cute and
delusional, and I wondered how long he would keep it up; there was only so much
room on my window ledge.

On Wednesday, during my lunch hour, a courier delivered a box
addressed to me. I didn’t open it straight away, thinking it may have been
stationery supplies. So when I eventually found the time to unseal the package
after the final school bell sounded and all the children had gone home for the
day, the ten bottles of mint sauce neatly packed inside had me falling down on
my chair in resounding defeat.
You fucking tenacious tool.

‘What’s that?’ Libby asked as she peered into the box. ‘You
seriously have a problem, an obsession with that stuff. It’s disgusting.’

‘I didn’t buy this,’ I deadpanned.

She picked up the note which was poking out from underneath
one of the bottles. ‘Then who did?’ she asked as she unfolded it. ‘Oh!’

Snatching it from her, I bit the inside of my cheek as I
read it to myself:
I couldn’t wait any longer and tried it for myself. Baby,
you are missing out. It glides on nicely. Derek

‘Is he suggesting what I think he is suggesting?’ Libby
asked, as she picked up a bottle and unscrewed the lid.

‘If you’re thinking that he wants me to suck it off his cock,
then yes,’ I answered.

‘Are you going to?’ she asked with a curious smile, dabbing
some sauce onto her finger.

Grabbing the bottle from her, I dabbed some on my finger too
and sucked at the tangy taste. ‘Mm ... no.’

‘You want to though,’ she implied, grabbing the bottle back.

‘I did. I don’t anymore.’

Lib smiled, this time greedily dabbing two fingers. ‘When
are you going to learn not to lie?’

I snatched it back and packed it away. ‘I’m not. Are you
ready? I want to get home to Sasha. Her boredom levels are increasing.’

***

As we pulled into the driveway, my eyes widened with shock.

‘What the hell?’ Libby shrieked. ‘Are they —’

‘Oh no! He didn’t,’ I exclaimed.

Libby laughed. ‘Oh yes, he did.’

I turned the ignition off, climbed out of Suzi and stormed up
the path, stopping and spinning 360°. Placed around the front of our house were
easily one hundred bottles of mint sauce, with notes attached. They were on the
front step, in the garden bed, lining the path. They were EVERYWHERE.

Snatching one up, I read the note:
I’m waiting. Derek

‘Grrr,’ I growled and picked up another one:
Come and get
it, baby. Derek

Libby giggled and read out another. ‘ “Two, four, six,
eight, hurry up, I can’t wait”.’

Placing my hands on my hips, I tried not to smile. Proof of
his determination was encircling me and decorating my front garden. I huffed
and growled again when my phone beeped from within my pocket.

You look a little flustered ~ Derek

My head shot up and I surveyed my surroundings. Unsuccessful
in my attempts to spot him, I quickly typed a response.