Audrey Hepburn: An Intimate Portrait (17 page)

In
yet another bit of outlandish change of heart, brother David, suddenly the good
guy, lectures Linus about the importance of love. Apparently the heart-to-heart
talk makes a difference, for Linus soon travels out to meet Sabrina midocean.

Ultimately,
the audience is asked to swallow too many personality changes in one
movie—with the exception of Sabrina’s father, who gladly accepts his lot in
life, the major characters in
Sabrina
all
become completely different personalities by the end of the film. Of course,
that was Audrey’s stock-in-trade in the movies, but as
Sabrina
would prove, it was best if Audrey was the only character
to undergo a transformation.

That’s
because when she was in a movie, audiences only paid attention to her. The other
characters worked best when they were used as foils to her personality.

In
the supremely confident and giving style that is one of his greatest strengths
and defining characteristics, Gregory Peck recalled the moment when he realized
Audrey was a star and he decided he had to do something about their billing.

“I
was slated to get top billing on
Roman
Holiday,
and despite the fact that Audrey’s part was much larger, I didn’t
have any trouble getting more attention than she,” he said. “It’s not
like I’m benevolent to an excessive degree. I would have retained the top
billing, if I didn’t realize without a doubt that Audrey would become a giant
star after
Roman Holiday
and that if
I didn’t kindly cede to her my position in the credits, I would begin to look
like an aging star desperately trying to hang on to status for security’s sake.

“It
was I who suggested that Audrey’s name be prominently displayed in the
advertisements. And I never regretted it. It made me seem prescient. But once
you saw that sweet little girl in action, you knew you were dealing with a
volcano of talent. Anybody who worked with her saw that.”

And
anybody who knew her personally learned that Audrey was also always on the
verge of erupting emotionally. Her passion for Holden was disrupting her life.
Because of the clandestine nature of their affair, Audrey was even more excited
by their relationship. She wasn’t eating or sleeping. She spent all her time
thinking about him, and the stolen moments they spent together in his dressing
room.

During
the filming of
Sabrina,
Audrey often
spent isolated weekends at home in her garden apartment while she obsessed
about what her lover was doing at home with his wife and kids.

She
lived in a modest two rooms on Los Angeles’s Wilshire Boulevard, to which she
would retreat on Friday after filming, refusing all invitations to go to
dinner.

“I
need to refuel,” she would tell her prospective hosts. In fact, she would
replay conversations with Holden, trying to deduce whether or not he was ready
to leave his wife for her. She did not want to confront him until she was sure
of the answer.

Once
Audrey was convinced that Holden really loved her and wanted to marry her, she
decided to postpone actually asking him to make a commitment, so sure was she
that they were meant to be. Never had she felt so compatible with anyone on
every level: intellectual, emotional, sexual.

Their
obvious—and unannounced—love for one another seemed to anger Bogart even
more. Already insecure about his abilities in the role, he felt further
ostracized by their partnership. He became so hateful toward them that director
Wilder unofficially banned him from socializing with the cast and crew after
hours.

It
was on one of those evenings that Audrey admitted to Holden that she wanted to
spend the rest of her life with him. He told her that he had always loved her,
from the first moment he laid eyes on her.

She
worried aloud that his wife, Ardis (whose stage name was Brenda Marshall),
would never get over his leaving her and starting a new family.

“But
I can’t start a new family,” Holden told Audrey. “I’ve had a
vasectomy.”

In
1953, vasectomies were irreversible. Audrey wanted a family. Her desire for
bearing children was so strong, so incontrovertible, that it made her decision
a very simple, although extremely painful, one. She broke it off with Holden,
ending the relationship with the love of her life. As vulnerable as Audrey
seemed, she was steely and determined when it came to going after what she
wanted. Or running away from what she didn’t.

Chapter 13

It
was a typical rebound affair. Still smarting from the end of her relationship
with Holden, Audrey was extremely vulnerable to love and attention when she met
actor/ director Mel Ferrer at a party in
London
.

Gregory
Peck was the host, and he introduced the couple, thinking their European
backgrounds might offer a common ground for an evening of talk.

“I
never dreamed they would marry, though,” Peck said.

Ferrer
was filming
Knights of the Round Table
at
the time, and he always was at his most charming when he was working.

We
talked about theater,“ Audrey recalled. ”I had seen a few productions
at the La Jolla Playhouse, and Mel had directed one of them, I think, and he
was eager to talk about the craft of the stage. I loved it! Mel could make
theater feel important, as important as the ballet. He was the first man to
make me feel my profession was a worthy one. In retrospect, that was very
important. Once it became clear I was going to work pretty steadily, it was
great to feel good about what I was doing.“

They
monopolized one another at the party. By the end of the evening, Audrey begged
Ferrer to send her any play he thought they might be able to do together.

Hollywood Reporter
columnist Radie Harris, a
longtime friend of Audrey’s, recalled their attraction as “completely
mutual. Is it any wonder that Mel Ferrer fell head over heels in love with such
a provocative, desirable creature?” she asked. “Mel had always been
attracted to glamorous, successful women. But the chemistry worked both ways. I
can also understand why Audrey succumbed to Mel’s charm.

“Mel
has that rare quality in an American male: He makes a woman feel like a
woman.”

But
with Audrey, that also meant making her feel insecure. As with many couples who
fall in love, Audrey and Ferrer soon discovered each other’s vulnerabilities.
Ferrer often exaggerated Audrey’s failures in coping in order to boost his own
flagging self-esteem. Because Audrey enjoyed being taken care of, the imbalance
of power in the early stages of their relationship suited each of them well.

Paradoxically,
however, as Audrey’s star continued to rise, she became more and more unsure
about her abilities.

“Everything
I did at a certain stage turned to gold,” she recalled. “It was most
unsettling. I remember thinking it was a big mistake when I was nominated for
an Oscar for
Roman Holiday,
but then
when I was nominated again for
Sabrina,
I
felt somebody was playing a cruel joke. I wasn’t so good in that one, and I
wondered how come nobody else noticed. Well, nobody except Mel. It’s not that
he criticized me, but he assessed my performance in a very professional way. He
was my anchor to reality.”

On
September 7, 1953
,
soon after
Roman Holiday
had become
an international hit,
Time
magazine
featured Audrey on its cover, a momentous occurrence for a screen newcomer. In
the article about her,
Time
wrote:
“Audrey Hepburn gives the popular old romantic nonsense a reality which it
seldom had before. Amid the rhinestone glitter of
Roman Holiday’s
make-believe,
Paramount
‘s
new star sparkles and glows with the fire of a finely cut diamond.
Impertinence, hauteur, sudden repentance, happiness, rebellion, and fatigue
supplant each other with speed on her mobile, adolescent face.”

Perhaps
the great irony was that while Audrey was being crowned as
Hollywood
royalty, she was not a product of
Hollywood
at all. As a girl she had immersed herself in dance, in theater, in music and
books. She studied languages, not movie magazines. She survived a war, not
lines at the Bijou to see Betty Grable. She who had never been interested in
the glitter and the glamour was suddenly taking
Hollywood
by storm.

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