Baby Love Lite (47 page)

“
Anything else?”

Trey knew me so well.

“
Okay, yes, there's
something else. I feel sort of angry with my father. Why in the
hell didn’t he check on her after he'd walked out? If he loved her,
why didn’t he see that she was protected? My God, he knew the type
of man Matthew was at that point.”

“
Aren’t you a bit angry with
your mother?” he asked quietly.

“
Why would I be mad at her?
She was the victim in all of this. I've no right to be angry with
her.” The tears started rolling down my cheeks as I continued to
deny any anger towards my mother.

“
Tylar, you've a right to
feel however you feel. Feelings are not right or wrong -
they
are what they are.”

He was rocking me gently back and forth in
his arms. I knew that he understood me totally. I couldn’t deny
those feelings to him any more than I could deny them to
myself.

“
Okay, yes then. I do feel
angry with her. Why didn’t she go to my father? She'd be alive
today if she'd done that. I just don’t get it. She died and left me
with Maggie. It was wrong.”

Trey lifted me up and turned me around to
face him. He gently brushed my tears away with his thumbs. He
leaned over and kissed my cheeks and my nose. I looked up at him
realizing that whatever pain I'd suffered along the way to finding
Trey had been worth it.

He tilted my chin upward and kissed me warmly
on my lips. I laced my arms around his neck and kissed him back
loving the taste and feel of him. We nestled under the covers of
the bed tossing our clothes to the floor. Trey made love to me
slowly and sweetly in my father’s house.

I awoke from my nap feeling Trey’s arm
wrapped around me and feeling someone’s eyes on me. It was Ms.
Deeny. She was standing at the foot of the bed watching us. I had
no clue as to how long she'd been there. She gave a slight smirk as
she saw me looking at her.

“
The judge sent me up to see
if you and Mr. Sinclair will be joining him for dinner. It’s in ten
minutes,” she said turning to leave. “Oh, I took the liberty of
caring for your baby while you and Mr. Sinclair . . .
slept.”

She was out the door. I threw the covers back
rousting Trey. He had napped through the one-way conversation that
had just taken place. “That gnarled up old bitch,” I hissed.

“
Who?”

“
Ms. Deeny, my dad’s head of
staff. She was just in here watching us.” Trey was up and out of
bed now putting his clothes back on. I headed into the bathroom to
freshen up.

“
What the hell? Are you
talking about that short lady with the long nose?”

“
Yes and apparently that
long nose serves her nosiness well. She totally gives me the
creeps. I hate the thought that she took Preston out of the
nursery.”

“
What?”

“
Yeah, that’s what she said.
Let’s hurry up and get downstairs for dinner. I don’t like the idea
of her being near the baby.”

“
Tylar, your dad wouldn’t
let anything happen to Preston. My God, he's totally infatuated
with her.”

When we got downstairs, Preston was playing
happily on a blanket on the floor with a multitude of toys strewn
about. My father was on his phone with someone. She crawled over to
Trey as soon as she saw him.

“
Da-da-da-da,” she said
tugging at his pant leg.

“
Yes, sweetie,” he laughed,
scooping her up and kissing her cheek. “Da-da has missed
you.”

She snuggled up in his arms resting her head
against his broad shoulder. How perfect they looked together. I
looked at my father as he continued talking in hushed tones to
someone on the phone. He was a handsome man as well. I wondered
what it would've been like growing up here with him.

He ended his phone call and stood up walking
towards us.

“
Dinner is being served now.
Tylar, I hope you don’t mind but I fed Preston some of the pureed
food you brought along. She's very fond of the green beans I
discovered.”

Uh oh. I hope he didn’t give her the whole
jar!

“
Yes, Dad, that’s fine. What
did you give her with the green beans?”

“
Well, I had some of that
pureed chicken, but she clamped her mouth shut when I offered that
to her. She wanted nothing but those green beans; finished off the
whole jar,” he replied chuckling. Trey and I exchanged glances. My
father looked from one of us to the other.

“
Did I do something wrong?”
he asked.

“
Your Honor, I think you'll
be assigned diaper dirty for this evening.” We both snickered
leaving Dad perplexed.

Trey put Preston in her high chair, and she
was given a graham cracker and some sliced banana. She was getting
pretty good with finger foods. Trey held my chair out for me as if
he did this all of the time. He noted my look of surprise and gave
me a dimpled grin. My father told us during dinner that he'd been
in touch with the state officials in Mississippi as well as some
judges he knew in that particular circuit court. He was expecting
things to move quickly.

Towards the end of the meal, Ms. Deeny
appeared in the formal dining room informing my father that an
important call had come in from Judge Westfield out of Jackson,
Mississippi. My father excused himself immediately to take the
call. Ms. Deeny lingered in the dining room. She asked Trey if he
needed anything else.

Midget bitch!

She took one of the cloth napkins and started
wiping Preston’s face that was now smeared with mushed banana and
soggy graham cracker crumbs. Preston didn’t like her touch. She
turned her head away and started fussing.

“
I can clean her up later,
Ms. Deeny,” I said.

“
No worries,” she replied
continuing to wipe at Preston’s face. She clearly ignored the fact
that it was pissing my baby off royally. “There now,” she said
stepping back. “That's so much better isn’t it little
Preston?”

Preston clutched another banana slice and
pressed it up to her mouth ignoring the woman. My father came back
into the room and thankfully Ms. Deeny took leave carrying some of
the dirty dishes to the kitchen.

“
The order of exhumation has
been signed by Judge Westfield. It's scheduled for 1:00 pm tomorrow
afternoon,” he announced.

From the kitchen we heard the sound of
shattering china as it hit the floor.

My father chartered a private plane to fly us
from Baton Rouge to Jackson, Mississippi, the following day. Edie
was to care for Preston while we were gone. I had a private
conversation with her before we left, instructing her not to let
Ms. Deeny anywhere near my daughter.

She'd nodded affirmatively and assured me not
to worry. I kissed Preston goodbye telling her we would be back by
dinnertime.

It was early December and there was
definitely a chill in the air. I'd dressed in corduroy slacks with
a bulky sweater and boots. The flight took about a half-hour. Once
we landed at the small private airport, a limo was waiting to take
us to the cemetery in Braxton which was a bit to the south of
Jackson.

I curled up against Trey in the car as the
limo made its way up the curving drive of the cemetery finally
stopping just past a concrete mausoleum that had the name “Renaud”
engraved on it.

The day was sunny and slightly breezy. There
was a damp feel to the air. The trees were bare. Dried, dead leaves
occasionally floated past us as we made our way to the mausoleum
and the officials standing there. A black hearse was parked off to
the side on another intersecting driveway.

My father presented the signed order to the
deputy sheriff who was amongst the throng of people The deputy read
through it and then handed it to a man I presumed to be the manager
of the cemetery.

This man then instructed a couple of his
workers to unlock the heavy, iron door to the mausoleum. Once
opened, we stepped inside. There was a barred window on the other
side of it that allowed sunlight to filter through. The flooring
was concrete. There looked to be about six marble plates affixed to
the fronts of the entombed caskets. Three rows of two.

My mother’s parents were entombed there,
along with my Renaud great-grandparents. My mother’s casket was
entombed on the end in the top row position.

Her marble memorial plate looked newer than
the others. It simply had her name, birth and death year carved on
it. It was nothing fancy. The unit below hers was empty.

The deputy sheriff observed as the cemetery
technician used a special tool to break the seal around the door to
my mother’s berth. I told Trey I needed to go back outside. The
crowded mausoleum was getting to me; I was extremely claustrophobic
and I needed fresh air.

“
Are you okay?” he asked me
as I sat down on a concrete bench outside of it.

“
It's musty in there and
crowded. I felt faint for a moment. I’m fine now.”

He sat down beside me, wrapping his arm
around me and pulling me close.

“
Trey, why are we here?” I
asked looking up at him.

I saw him furrow his brow in confusion. “It's
customary for family members be present when a grave is disturbed,”
he said.

“
This is clearly something
my father could've handled alone.”

Trey took my hand and studied me for a
moment. “Don’t you want to see her?” he asked me gently. I looked
at him aghast. It hadn't occurred to me that her casket would be
opened until she got to the county coroner’s office for the
forensic autopsy. I figured at that point the metal box would be
removed and given to me or to my father.

“
Are you serious? They're
not going to open her casket here, are they? I don’t want to see my
mother’s decomposed remains.” I was horrified that Trey had asked
such a question.

“
Tylar, I don’t think it's
going to be as bad as all of that. Yes, they'll open the casket
here to make sure it contains a body, first of all; and to
establish the identity as being her.”

I turned from him thoroughly appalled at the
idea of looking at my mother’s corpse.

“
Tylar, no one's going to
force you to look at her, but I just thought if you wanted to it
might help you put some closure on things.”

By this time, the deputy and cemetery people
had exited the mausoleum. The deputy was carrying a dark metal box
that had a handle on it.

“
They have to book that in
as evidence, sweetie.”

My father was still inside with her. I didn’t
budge. Trey remained next to me not saying anything further. It was
several minutes later that my father emerged. He came over to where
Trey and I were standing. His eyes were red. He'd been crying. It
distressed me to see him like that.

“
Tylar,” he said to me
softly, “would you like to say good-bye to your mother? She looks
beautiful.”

I stood up. My legs were wobbly. Everything
had a surreal feeling to it. Trey was beside me, taking my arm. My
father stayed outside as we made our way back inside the mausoleum.
I saw the opened lid of the casket. It was the type that had two
lids. Only the top one had been opened. Her casket was on a dolly
of some sort so it could be wheeled outside to the waiting hearse.
Trey held my hand as we walked to the side of it.

The first thing I saw was her hair. It was
just like mine. It was cut in long layers that framed her face. As
I looked at her I was amazed at how much I resembled her. It looked
like me laying there asleep. She'd been buried in a red sweater
dress. Her hands were clasped together resting on her stomach. I
looked at the satin pillow where her head rested. I saw the caul
that Trinity had spoken of. It looked like a thin nylon veil that'd
been draped on the pillow next to her. Someone had placed a ragged
teddy bear in the casket next to her. It might've been mine.

I felt the tears stream down my face. I'd no
memory of her at all. She'd carried me, given birth to me, fed and
nurtured me, yet I had no memory of any of that. I'd been cheated
out of a mother; she'd been cheated out of a life. Trey squeezed my
hand gently. My sobs escaped as I looked at this beautiful creature
that I'd never known.

“
Mommy,” I sobbed, wiping my
tears with the back of my hand. "We'll make this right. I promise
you that.” I leaned over and brushed a kiss against her hair. Trey
enfolded me in his arms and led me outside once again.

My father was waiting in the limo for us. The
deputy sheriff and the cemetery personnel wheeled the now closed
casket out to the waiting hearse. She'd be taken to Jackson for the
forensic autopsy.

Her body would then be placed back into her
final resting place here. My father said that he would be back to
ensure everything went as planned.

“
When will we know about the
contents of the metal box?” I asked.

“
Once it's all been reviewed
by the D.A’s office, anything that's not pertinent to her death
will be released. Anything deemed pertinent as evidence will remain
in custody with the authorities until such time as the case is
resolved in criminal court.”

“
How long could all of that
take?”

“
Tylar, don’t worry; I'll
use any means possible to avoid dragging this out. I've scheduled a
meeting with the D.A. day after tomorrow.”

I leaned against Trey in the car. “I want to
go home, Trey.”