“Look, I didn’t come out here to get laughed at. I came out here to talk to you about our living arrangements.”
“Ub-oh,” I sighed. “I knew this was coming sooner or later. You want me to give you some more money toward the rent?”
I didn’t really think she wanted to talk about money, but I threw it out there just in case. I had to show her that I appreciated what she was doing. I didn’t want her to think I was some deadbeat trying to take advantage of her kindness. But this little conversation we were about to have was about way more than money. This was about Brittany’s personal space and privacy, something she’d lost when I moved in to her living room. With me there, she’d been real careful about covering herself up when she came out of the shower, taking her phone calls in her bedroom, shit like that. But I know that had to be bothering her. She should have been able to walk around her place butt-naked if she wanted to.
So I knew what she was going to say. It was time for me to leave. And as a true friend, I could appreciate that. Shoot, I don’t think I could ever repay her for her kindness. She hadn’t complained once the entire time I was there. As much as I didn’t want to go back home yet, I owed it to Brittany to give her back her place.
“This is not about money, Travis,” she replied. “You’ve already given me enough money to damn near pay my entire rent. I just can’t have you sleeping on my couch anymore. It’s just not right—”
She sounded upset, so I cut her off. “Look Brittany, I can see where this is going, and I appreciate everything you’ve done for me. I’m gonna go find a place on the base in the morning. I’ll be out your hair by tomorrow afternoon, ah’ight?”
“No, it’s not all right.” Her tone surprised me. She really sounded frustrated. “Damn, don’t you men understand anything about women?”
I shrugged my shoulders. “Evidently not, because I don’t know what the hell is wrong with you.”
She got up and sat on the edge of the couch.
“You don’t know what I’m talking about? What I’m talking about is that I want you to move off my couch so that you can move into my bed, Travis.” She kissed me passionately and her hands roamed my body until my manhood sprang to attention.
“Whoa. Where’d that come from?” I muttered as our lips parted.
“It came from here.” She pointed at her heart, but her eyes never left mine. “Travis, I’ve tried to be respectful of what you have, or think you have, with Stephanie, but it’s been a while now and you haven’t even attempted to go home. I hope I’m not overstepping my boundaries, but you’re a good man and I’m sick of waiting for you to notice that I’m a good woman.”
I’m not gonna pretend like I never thought about Brittany and me getting together. Hell, everyone on base already thought we were together. But the truth is, I didn’t know what to do about her. I still thought about Stephanie a lot. I had to get over one hurdle before I could attempt another.
“Are you serious, Brittany? You really wanna be with me?”
“Uh-huh.” She bent down to kiss my neck. “I’ve never been more serious about anything in my entire life.” She blew in my ear and I instinctively wrapped my arms around her back, holding on tight. I was ready to give in right then and there. She felt so damn good, and I really missed a woman’s touch. But my conscience wouldn’t let me do that. At least not until Stephanie and I officially broke up. I mean, hell, she was still living in my house.
“Look, Brittany. I like you. I like you a lot. But I still have feelings for Stephanie. It wouldn’t be fair to you, because I wouldn’t be giving a hundred percent to the relationship. Not yet, anyway.” I removed my arms from around her waist.
“I know you have feelings for her, Travis. I was just hoping that you might let me help you forget about them.” She gave me a quick peck on the lips then stood. “I’m going to bed, but my door is always open. Let me know when you’re ready to be with someone who appreciates you.” I watched Brittany’s hips sway in that thong and shook my head. Damn, was I really turning down an offer to get my hands on that? Well, at least Brittany had done one good thing for me tonight. It was time for me to stop feeling sorry for myself and make a decision about Stephanie and me.
I stopped staring at the ceiling and got my ass up off the couch about an hour after Brittany went back in her bedroom. As you can probably imagine, I found it rather hard to fall asleep. Every time I closed my eyes, I’d see an image of Brittany’s ass swaying back and forth in that thong, and my johnson would get rock-hard. Unlike me, my johnson didn’t have a conscience. It kept trying to convince me to go in there and take Brittany up on her offer. Finally, after a lofty mental debate with my johnson, I caved in. I knocked on Brittany’s bedroom door to get some of what my body was craving.
“Brittany?” There was a single candle burning, and she was lying on her bed naked. She wasn’t asleep, either.
“Yes, Travis?”
“You really think you can make me forget Stephanie?”
“I sure as hell wanna try. Come on in here.”
It was six in the morning when I moved Brittany’s arm from around my waist and slipped out of bed. I had to give her credit. She wasn’t Stephanie, but she was one hell of a sex kitten in the bedroom. We had two hours of the wildest and most uninhibited sex I’d ever had. And it was just what I needed. Or at least what I thought I needed.
I really liked Brittany. We had a lot in common, with both of us being sergeants in the army and all. And even more important, I trusted her. Long before we had a physical relationship in Germany, we had developed a great friendship. That was something Stephanie and I never had. Maybe that had been our problem. Sometimes we’re more faithful to our friends than to our lovers.
All that being said, I was still reaching into Brittany’s hall closet for my duffel bags. Even though I had a great time with Brittany, I still couldn’t fall asleep. The sex was great, but once it was over, my conscience went into overdrive, and my mind kept drifting back home to my son, to Maleka. And yes, to Stephanie. Yeah, she’d done me wrong, and I’d probably be better off without her, but I owed it to the kids to at least try to figure this mess out. Besides, I’d forgotten something when I went into that bedroom last night. I’d forgotten that I still loved Stephanie. So the best thing for me to do was get the hell outta Brittany’s house as quickly as possible. Staying with her just meant I’d end up sleeping with her again, and that would only complicate things more than they already were.
“Travis, what are you doing?” I turned and Brittany was standing in the doorway.
“I’m packing.” I zipped up my duffel bag and tried to keep my eyes from wandering over her body.
“I can see that. I just don’t understand why.”
“Because I don’t wanna hurt you, Brittany. Last night was beautiful, but it’s not gonna change the fact that I’m still in love with Stephanie. I can’t get her out of my head. I really thought being with you last night would help me forget, but it’s gonna take more time. If I stick around here, you’re just gonna get hurt, and I don’t want that to happen.”
I walked over and kissed her forehead. “I wish things were different.” And I really did. Here was this beautiful, understanding woman offering to love me, and I was turning her down for someone who’d betrayed me over and over again.
“You’re going back to her, aren’t you?”
“Yeah, I think so.” I nodded. “I gotta give it one more try. If only for the kids.”
“Lucky kids,” she said sadly. “You know, I should hate you for this, Travis. But I gotta take some of the blame. I knew what I was getting into when I asked you to sleep in my bed.”
“I would understand if you did hate me, Brittany. Truth is, I hate myself for doing it. But I’d rather do this now than six months from now.” I reached into my pocket. “Here’s your key.”
“No. Just lock the door on your way out. You never know—you may change your mind again.”
I smiled at her. “You never know—I just might.”
“If you do come back, Travis, just understand one thing. I want you to come back as my man. I’m not some chick you can just lay up with when you’re mad at Stephanie.”
“I know. And I wouldn’t have it any other way.”
“Take care of yourself, Travis. I’m gonna miss you.”
Brittany’s eyes looked misty, and she turned quickly and headed back into her bedroom. I sighed deeply, then picked up my bags and left.
When I got to the house, I’d barely gotten out of the truck when Stephanie, fully dressed, ran out to meet me. Just the sight of her hurt. I didn’t realize quite how much I’d missed her, or how guilty I’d feel about cheating on her.
“Travis? What are you doing here?”
“What do you mean, what am I doing here? I came to see the kids.” I glanced at my watch. “Didn’t I tell you I’d be here at seven o’clock?”
“Yeah. But I thought you meant seven o’clock this evening, not seven in the morning. We were supposed to have dinner.” She looked a little nervous. Same way I felt. There was so much we had to talk about.
“Well, you don’t mind if I’m a little early, do you?” I smiled, hoping to relax some of the tension. I held up a box of Krispy Kreme donuts. “I brought breakfast. Your favorite. Apple crumb.”
“That’s real nice, Travis.”
I stepped away from the truck and headed toward the house. I expected her to follow, but she stood in her spot and called after me. “It’s nice, but . . .”
“But what?”
“But I gotta pick up Big Momma and take her to the doctors. Why don’t you come back this afternoon?”
“Why don’t I just go with you?” I had no place else to go, anyway. And after setting eyes on Stephanie and the house that was supposed to hold our happy little family, I wanted it all back. I wanted to work things out. I took hold of her hand and stared straight in her eyes. “I’m ready to come home, Stephanie. What better way to start that than letting Big Momma know we’re back together?”
“And I’m ready for you to come home, Travis.” She was talking real fast, her voice was all business. She didn’t seem to be moved by my little speech at all. “But I don’t think Big Momma would feel comfortable having you go with us to her gynecologist.”
“Oh, yeah. You’re probably right.” I didn’t exactly wanna be there for that, either. “So why don’t I just stay here with the kids until you come back?”
“No. That’s not gonna work. Big Momma asked me to bring the kids, ’cause she promised to get Maleka some shoes. You know how she is. She’s gonna wanna get T. J. some, too.”
“Yeah, I guess you’re right. Lemme just go say hi to the kids before you all leave.” I stepped away from her, and Stephanie grabbed my hand in a panic.
“You can’t go in there. I got a surprise in there.” She had quite a grip on my arm. “And, um, it won’t be ready till tonight.”
“What kind of surprise?” I asked suspiciously.
Something was wrong. She was acting way too funny. I was nervous, too, but this was something else. She had begged me to come home and now she hadn’t even given me a kiss. And she was doing her damnedest to keep me out of the house. Desperate, just like she’d been that night Malek was on the phone. My heart sank. Here I was hoping for reconciliation, and Stephanie was still playing games. I was afraid I already knew the rest of the story.
“Look, Stephanie. I’m gonna go kiss my kids; then I’m gonna go make me some breakfast. Whatever surprise you have for me is no big deal, because I’m home.” I pulled my arm away from her and headed for the house.
“Travis, don’t!” She ran behind me.
“What do you mean, don’t? What’s going on, Stephanie?”
“I mean, don’t go in the house.”
“Why?” I halted in my tracks and turned to face her. My arms were crossed tightly over my chest, because I was afraid of how I might use them if she said what I thought she would.
“Because Malek is in the house,” she said quietly. I felt like I was gonna explode. My muscles tensed, and it took everything I had not to slap her.
With tears in her eyes, she tried to explain. “It’s not what you think, Travis. Not at all. He just—”
My hands flew up in the air and she flinched. I took a few steps back to put some distance between us.
“He’s in my house with my kids. With my son! You fucking bitch! You have fucked me over for the very last time.” I took a step toward the house, then stopped myself. If I kept going, I’m sure I would have killed Malek and possibly Stephanie. “I want you out my house. You got exactly one month to get all your shit out my house.”
Her eyes were wide and her voice trembled. “No, Travis! Please don’t do this. Please let me explain. We can work this out. You just have to listen to me.”
“Ain’t nothing you could say that would make me change my mind.” I headed for the truck. “I mean it, Stephanie. You got one fucking month. After that, I’m throwing your shit out.”
“What about T. J.? I thought you didn’t want him to grow up in the projects.”
“I didn’t want his mother to be a whore, either, but she is. I’ll have my lawyer contact you about custody.” I started the engine and watched her crumple to the ground in hysterical sobs as I drove away.