Backstage (The Barter System Book 4) (32 page)

* * * * *

Kiefer opened his eyes as the smell of bacon made his stomach growl.  He took a moment to get his bearings and knew exactly who was cooking.  Sitting up on the edge of the bed, he pulled on his jeans and walked to the other end of Teddy’s apartment. 

She was wearing his shirt and heavy white socks on her feet.  He could tell she wasn’t wearing a bra and he wondered if she was wearing panties. 

Across the counter were platters of pastries, pancakes, bacon, and cut up fruit.  When she turned wearing her little glasses and gave him a smile, it felt like his heart stopped beating. 

“Good morning, Kiefer.”

“You’re even prettier first thing, Teddy.” 

“So are you…I told you so.”  She winked and made his coffee just the way he liked it. 

He felt off balance and moved around the counter to hug her.  She smelled amazing.  “You’ve been busy.  Not sure how long you’ve been up but…are you expectin’ company?”

That made her laugh.  “No.  It’s just you.  I wasn’t sure what you liked for breakfast so I whipped up a few things.  It didn’t take long.”  She reached out to rub her palm over his stubble.  “That’s lovely.” 

Leaning in to the touch, he closed his eyes.  “Thanks.”

“Did you sleep alright?” 

His hands moved down her sides and around to her ass, gradually lifting the hem of his shirt until he reached bare skin. 
No panties.
  He squeezed gently and she sighed. 

The sound sank deep and he wished either life were simpler or he were a more complicated man.  He pulled her firmly against him. 

“I want to make you come.  I
need
it.” 

Her eyes met his and she whispered, “I want you to eat.  Then you can have anything else you want.”

Unable to stop the sigh, he slowly released the cheeks of her ass one finger at a time.  Stepping back, he picked up his coffee.  “What do you normally do every day?”

She pulled out a barstool and he settled into it.  A delicate hand raked through his hair, smoothing it away from his face, and his eyes drifted closed.  “How tactile you are.  I don’t believe you’re touched enough.” 

Before he could censor the words, he murmured, “No one really touched me at all before you.”  Realizing what he’d said, he met her gaze.  Too late to change the admission, he shrugged.  “As much as the women I…
date
tend to fit a certain criteria, it’s the same for them, Teddy.  All I’m required to be is good lookin’ and fun to be around.  Pickin’ up the tab doesn’t hurt.” 

“That’s the saddest thing I’ve ever heard.”  She squeezed his shoulder and returned to the inner kitchen to make him a plate.  “Excessively beautiful women – the kind I would think are your usual choice – expect things to be a certain way because the world usually makes things happen for beautiful people.”

He said quietly, “You’re beautiful, Teddy.”  He meant it but he could tell she thought he was just being sweet. 

“I have interesting features but that is not the same thing at all.  To qualify for the true beauty club, I’d need to be tall, thin, and have the ability to pose prettily for no reason.”  She shrugged.  “I’m aware that I’m very different from the type of women you date, Kiefer.  On the up side, I don’t need you to pick up my tab and I prefer
real
over
fun
.” 

Putting the dish down in front of him, she added, “You
are
good looking and you’re aware of the fact.  However, while I enjoy your outer shell as I do all beautiful things, it is not the first thing I noticed nor would it have mattered to me if you’d been unattractive.”

“What did you notice first?” he wondered aloud.

“Your accent and how strong your arms were.”  She leaned on the counter with her coffee in her hand.  “Kiefer.  Why do you have this fixation in your head about who you’re supposed to be?  Neither of your parents seem to care what any of you do as long as you’re happy.” 

He couldn’t tell her who he was on the inside.  Someone like her would never understand.  He was still reeling from her accurate evaluations. 

“I’m happy, Teddy.  Right now, I’m real happy with the view.” 

Glancing down, she realized her position exposed a lot of her cleavage.  Looking at him again, her eyes were sad.  “Okay, Kiefer.  I get it.” 

For the first time in a long time, he didn’t have an appetite.  He stared at the back of his hand.  “I’m going to call the family and see what time everything is supposed to happen today.” 

Taking a sip of her coffee, Teddy didn’t say anything.  She walked past her bedroom to a hidden closet.  A minute later, she came back out in yoga pants and a t-shirt.  His shirt dangled from her fingers. 

“Here you go.  I’m sure there will be some scrambling today.  Your sisters will be grateful for your help.  No need to call them.” 

Slowly, he lifted his hand and took his shirt.  As he shrugged it on, she found the rest of his belongings and set them on the bar.  Then she packed him a container of breakfast pastries. 

He wanted to say something, do something to bring back the way things had been the night before. 

When he was fully dressed, she moved to stand in front of him, smoothing her hands over his chest.  “Thank you for last night.  Your appetite will return with some distance.”  On her tiptoes, she kissed his chin and started to turn away. 

He grabbed her and hugged her hard.  Holding a fistful of her hair, he kissed her, drank her down,
reminded
her of every second, and then he let her go.  Grabbing everything off the bar, he followed her to the exit that led to the street. 

As he moved to pass her, she gave him a smile that didn’t reach her eyes. 

“Teddy…”

“See you later, Kiefer.  Be careful out there.” 

With a nod, he walked up the steps.  The door closed and locked behind him.  He stood on the street in front of her place for several minutes, arguing with himself over stupid shit he couldn’t change. 

Finally, he hailed a cab and returned to his hotel.

* * * * *

As Kiefer disappeared into a cab, Theodora sighed and walked away from the security panel.  Over the next hour, she cleaned up and thought about the time she’d spent with the sort of man who inspired envy. 

He hadn’t lied to her.  He never pretended.  Every word he’d told her was the truth.

Despite their arrangement, despite the fact that she hadn’t shed a single tear in front of him, she doubted he’d get within ten feet of her the rest of the time he spent in New York. 

She never should have asked such a personal question. 

In the shower, as the water massaged muscles that were tender from unfamiliar use, she allowed herself to cry for things that could never be. 

Then she relived every sensual moment she’d experienced with him and came quickly by her own hand.  The sound of her breathing was loud in the small space. 

“That’s why, Kiefer.  The mere
memory
of you will get me through a lot of lonely nights in my future.” 

After a few more tears, she took a deep breath and started her day.

* * * * *

Theodora’s mother was deteriorating every day.  Each morning, she sat with a woman who’d once had the energy to run the New York Marathon and care for elderly patients.  All the while, she’d helped the aging members of her own family, kept an eye on all the younger set, and raised a daughter with special needs. 

The helplessness she felt was hard to hide from Bridgette Grove.  Often, her mother called her on it. 

“Alice mentioned you have a gentleman caller.”  Saying the phrase made her giggle despite the twisted, painful condition of her joints.  “Tell me about him.” 

“He calls me Teddy.  We’re just friends, Mom.” 

“Is that code for…?”

“Yes.  Yes it is.”  Unable to hold it back, she started to laugh.  Only when she had it under control did she add, “Not sure how I get myself in these situations but…I’m going to go with it.” 

“Deal with the fallout later?” 

“Yup.” 

“Excellent choice.  Life is too short to avoid the great stuff just because it might have some consequences.” 

“You’re the best mother on the planet.” 

Focusing tired blue eyes on Theodora’s face, she replied, “You made it look pretty fucking easy, actually.” 

They talked for a little longer and she sat with Bridgette after she received her next dose of medication. 

As she began to drift into a drug-induced sleep, she murmured, “Take everything life has to offer and pay the tab when it comes due, Theodora.  Teddy…I like that.  Your grandmother would have liked it, too.” 

For a long time, she sat watching her mother sleep, holding her hand gently between her own.  It was a hand that had once been able to sew, cook, and braid hair but now could barely hold a utensil to eat. 

The tears she cried were silent but wracking, hurting her ribs.  When she’d purged the worry and stress she felt for a woman she was unable to help, she leaned over and kissed her cheek.  She spoke quietly with her nurse, then gathered her things and headed for the theater. 

Walking up the steps to the back door, Theodora was startled to see Kiefer waiting for her on the landing.

Saying nothing, he moved to stand on the pavement so they were at eye level, took her in his arms, and kissed her.  It was so easy to fall into what he offered and she did. 

I’ll pay the tab later…

She hadn’t embellished any of the night before and as his lips and tongue worked over hers, she knew she’d continue to take what he offered until he returned to Oklahoma. 

Perhaps it wasn’t good for her heart but her spirit soaked up the attention in desperation.

He held her hard, his fingers massaging her through the layers of clothes she wore.  When he finally lifted his head, breaking the kiss, he rested his forehead against hers. 

“Please, Teddy.” 

“It’s alright, Kiefer.  We still have time.” 

“You’ll spend it with me?”  She nodded and he exhaled in such relief that it surprised her.  A man like him would have no difficulty finding company that was more along his normal fare, even in New York.  “I need that, to be with you.  I need to touch you.” 

He pulled her up the stairs and into the alcove where security worked when the theater was open.  The screens showed the alleyway at the back of the building and gave her a bit of light to see. 

Pushing her against the wall, he kept his mouth beside her ear.  “I didn’t mean to hurt you, Teddy.  I’m fucked up.” 

“I’m fine.  I understand.  Your honesty means a lot to me.”  She held him against her and wondered at the fact that he trembled slightly.  He breathed deeply against her hair.

“You smell so good.  I want to make you come.”

His hand was already under her jacket and two shirts, slipping flat beneath the band of her jeans.  He continued to whisper to her as he worked his way through slickness that appeared the moment he touched her.  She could
hear
him touching her, stroking her. 

“So wet and hot for me already.  My cock throbs for you.”  Reaching between them, she unbuttoned his pants and cupped the ridge through his boxer briefs.  “Feel how hard I am?”  She nodded.  “All I can think about is sinkin’ to my balls inside you while I suck your beautiful nipples.  Fuckin’ you over and over until both of us are unable to move.”

The words, the images, and his touch pushed her quickly through climax.  She felt him gather her fluids on the inside of his hand, using the other to pull his cock free of his clothes. 

“I need to come, Teddy.” 

He slicked her release along the shaft and she’d never seen anything so erotic in her entire life.  Staring at him fisting himself, stroking up and down the length, made her mouth water. 

She met his eyes and licked her lips. 

“Suck me…please.” 

Lowering to her knees, she placed her fingers over his.  The knuckles were white and she could feel the tendons in his hand as he moved over his skin.  Leaning forward, she licked away the pearlescent drop on the tip and he whimpered. 

Taking the broad head between her lips, she received a spurt of semen that she knew he was struggling to hold back.  His flesh was hot, slightly salty, but clean and silky.

“Your mouth.  I can’t take it.  It feels too good.”  One big hand cupped the back of her head and she took him deeper.  “Yes…a little more.  Fuck…
fuck
!” 

The sensation of Kiefer coming in her mouth was a new one but she managed to swallow around him as he thrust against her gently.  His fingers continued to stroke until the last drops left the head. 

When she could, she took him as deep as she could and tasted herself on his skin.  Everything about him made her heart race in her chest.

“Watchin’ myself disappear between your lips is like
nothing
else.”  His voice was strained.  She wanted to see his face and she lifted her gaze as she swirled her tongue over him.  “Your eyes…
fuck
.” 

He wasn’t fully soft but he pulled from her with a soft
pop
.  Crouching in front of her, he rubbed his thumb over the corner of her mouth and she licked the small drop of his release she’d missed.

It took him little effort to lift her to her feet and she found herself pinned against the wall again. 

“I could fuck you again right
now
.  I already want more.  I’m greedy.  I want to
drown
in you, Teddy.  You’re a gift I don’t deserve.” 

Holding his face in her hands, she smiled.  “Let’s keep it simple.  Take what we have, for as long as you’re here, and be grateful for it.  It doesn’t have to be complicated.  It doesn’t need to be more than what it is.  What we agreed it would be.”

The kiss he delivered sank into the center of her heart and when he broke it and nodded against her hair, she exhaled slowly. 

Every day she had him, she would be glad.  Every moment they shared, she would hold close to herself to remember. 

It was all she had been offered and it was what she would accept.

They straightened their clothing and he escorted her to the kitchen area.  When he headed back to see if his family needed anything, she ducked into the restroom and cleaned herself up.  Noticing several drops of his semen on her over-shirt, she removed it with a smile and got to work.