Badger the Mystical Mutt and the Barking Boogie (7 page)

But Badger was nowhere to be seen.

Back in the lane, Badger was busy sending p-mails to all the local mutts, asking for help. He needed everyone to rally round and donate a tin of their own
Buddy Bites
dog food for Cheryl. So far, he'd had no response and was trying to figure out a spell for conjuring up some
Buddy Bites
. He walked heavily back to his garden and came nose to nose with Dodgy Dave.

“Oh, hello, Dodgy Dave. This is a surprise,” said Badger. “Can I help you?”

“Help me? You've destroyed me, you snooping meddling mutt. Why on earth would I want
your
help? I'm here to pick a bone with you and your prattling ways.”

Badger stepped back as Dodgy Dave lunged forward, baring his teeth.

He gulped when he saw his sharp fangs glisten.

“Did I mention that I used to box?” snarled Dodgy Dave.

“This could get nasty,” thought Badger and quickly tapped his red-spotted neckerchief.

“Show Koo Ray, Show Koo Ray
,

Over to you, 'Chief, please save me today.”

The knot in the neckerchief unravelled, flew towards Dodgy Dave and swirled around his head.

Dodgy Dave looked upwards and crossed his eyes trying to focus on the speeding cloth.

'Chief tied itself swiftly around Dodgy Dave's eyes in a tight blindfold.

Dodgy Dave shook his head and staggered, spinning full circle with his paws thrashing around him.

“Where are you? It's all gone black.”

“You'll see things better if you calm down and listen to me,” said Badger softly.

“I can't see anything at all,” said Dodgy Dave in a panic.

“Do you promise to behave?” asked Badger.

“Do I have a choice?” asked Dodgy Dave sourly.

“We always have choices,” said Badger wisely, then added, “but in this instance … no, you don't.”

“Okay then,” agreed Dodgy Dave through gritted teeth.

“Show Koo Ray, Show Koo Ray, come back, 'Chief, and light the way,”
said Badger

The red-spotted neckerchief loosened itself from Dodgy Dave's head and flew back to Badger's neck. Badger tapped it with his paw in thanks.

Dodgy Dave shook himself and widened his eyes in the brightness.

“I can see again.”

“Good, but I'd like to help you see things more clearly, Dodgy Dave.”

“What you are talking about?”

“The red rosette from your grandfather, and how you adore dancing!”

Dodgy Dave breathed out a long, slow sigh.

“How do you and Cheryl know about that? Thanks to you, the gang now know too, and I've kept that secret for so many years.”

“You mean you've had to hide the thing you love the most. because you're afraid of what the others may think and do? Are you ashamed of having a dream?”

Dodgy Dave lowered his head and whispered, “I've never been able to talk to anyone other than my grandpa about it. He was a champion dancer. He encouraged me to dance. Then I got in with the Boxer dogs and followed them onto the streets.”

“And they didn't think dancing was something fighting dogs like you should do?”

Dodgy Dave shook his head.

“So you had to obey them?”

Dodgy Dave nodded.

“Why?” asked Badger gently.

“Because I wanted to be like them, and be liked by them.”

“I've seen you dance, Dodgy Dave. I've never seen anything like it. You have such a talent.”

Dodgy Dave blushed.

“Do you think they were right to stop you from dancing?” continued Badger.

“Well,
they
didn't dance,” answered Dodgy Dave.

“So, because they didn't dance, anyone who
did
dance was seen as different?”

“Yes,” said Dodgy Dave, “different … and a bit daft.”

“Was your grandfather daft, too?”

Dodgy Dave bristled. “He wasn't daft, he was brilliant! He was the greatest dancer in the world.”

“Then I think you know what you have to do, to respect and continue his legacy. Why don't you partner Cheryl, and go and win that red rosette in the
Hotpaws Barking Boogie
?” suggested Badger kindly.

“But she stinks!”

“Leave that with me! I'm working on it,” said Badger mysteriously.

Dodgy Dave brightened and bowed his thanks to Badger solemnly. Then he spun on his heels, did a sprightly sidekick and tap-danced his way to the crack in the fence.

Badger followed Dodgy Dave into the lane and sniffed the wooden fence. Bingo! He had received over 100 replies to his p-mail.

Operation
Buddy Bites
was underway.

Badger watched as a procession of dogs passed by the crack in the fence. They were all heading for one place — Cheryl's garden. In their paws they carried tins of
Buddy Bites
.

When Cheryl's Big Folk opened their back door, they were surprised to discover a pile of neatly stacked tins on the step.

Cheryl ran past their feet and stopped sharp.

“Oh my goodness,” she thought. “
Buddy Bites!
They look tasty.” She sniffed and sniffed, then sniffed some more. She looked up at her Big Folk, fluttered her long eyelashes and wagged her bottom.

Cheryl's Big Folk lifted a tin from the top and read its label aloud. “
Lickerish Luscious Morsels in Gravy Goo.
” They lifted another. “
Beefy Brutus Wellies
. Are these for you, Cheryl?”

Cheryl jumped up and down and yapped hungrily. She followed her Big Folk inside, licking her lips.

“Packed with all the vitamins and minerals your dog needs to keep its heart healthy,” continued her Big Folk. Cheryl thought about how her heart had been fluttering recently when she saw Dodgy Dave. She hoped that
Buddy Bites
might stop the butterflies in her tummy too.

While Cheryl was tucking in to her new-found feast, Badger saw Dodgy Dave sidle past his garden. He walked into the lane and followed him. Dodgy Dave was also making his way towards Cheryl's back garden. When Dodgy Dave entered the garden, he looked around him shiftily.

Peering through a hole in the fence, Badger saw him add a tin of
Savoury Shoot Stew Buddy Bites
to the heap of tins on the step. After Dodgy Dave had looked over his shoulder a few more times, he pulled something out from under his arm and laid it down. Then he turned on his heels and ran back to the lane.

Badger hid behind the wheelie bin and, when he returned to his spyhole, he spotted a bunch of golden dandelions beside the tin. He smiled to himself and thought that Dodgy Dave was now definitely ready to be Cheryl's dancing partner.

A few days later, when the number of tins outside Cheryl's back door had shrunk significantly, Badger spotted the Pong Police in the lane, tearing down their old
Warning
notices and replacing them with a new poster. He waited for them to leave and ran up to read what was on it.

He read aloud:

T
HIS
L
ANE IS NOW OFFICIALLY OPEN AGAIN, AND HAS BEEN
CLEARED UNDER SECTION
111
OF THE
P
ONG
S
TATUTE
,
AS THE
HIDEOUS SMELL HAS MYSTERIOUSLY DISAPPEARED
.

“Well,” he thought, “those
Buddy Bites
worked faster than I realised. If the lane is open, it means Cheryl is pong-free.”

Just then Dodgy Dave ambled along the lane.

“I see the Pong Police have packed up and left,” he shouted to Badger.

“Yes, it looks like things are back to normal again.” He looked at Dodgy Dave, who seemed to have softened since he saw him last. “So now the
Hotpaws Barking Boogie
can go ahead tomorrow as planned. Will you be entering?” he ventured.

“I'd like to,” sighed Dodgy Dave. “But I still need a dancing partner.”

Right on cue, Cheryl skipped up the lane to join them.

Badger winked at Dodgy Dave and said, “I don't think you'll have to look far for your dancing partner.”

Dodgy Dave turned to Cheryl and sniffed the air around her cautiously.

“Cheryl, you smell beautiful,” he beamed.

“Thank you,” she blushed. “The
Buddy Bites
are really agreeing with me. I loved your flowers, Dodgy Dave, and I liked the flavour you left best. You are very kind.”

Dodgy Dave kicked his paws together bashfully, and asked, “Would you dance, if I asked you to dance?”

Cheryl curtsied and replied, “It would be my pleasure.”

Dodgy Dave bowed, took her paw gently in his and they danced off down the lane together.

Badger returned to his garden and treated himself to a well-deserved higgledy-piggledy tower of toast.

“What a Badgical Magical job well done,” he thought, feeling very pleased with himself.