Uh... not just now, okay? he said, standing, but Grayson would not let go of his hand. I need to speak to your mom first.
Shes down at the river, Jo Lynn said, now standing back to let him enter. I can send Grayson down.
Actually, would it be all right if I walked down? Matt asked. If there was going to be another scene, he preferred Grayson not witness it this time, having recognized, of course, that that was the second most reprehensible thing hed ever done in his life.
Jo Lynn looked over her shoulder, toward another row of big picture windows on the opposite end of a great room, through which Matt could see a stretch of glimmering river. I guess thatd be okay, she said after a moment. Come on in.
Matt stepped inside or rather, was pulled in by Grayson, who still had a fierce clamp on his hand, and along with the four dogs, moved into the cool interior. He was standing a few steps above a sunken great room, where overstuffed couches and armchairs graced the wooden floor and large woven rug. A massive fireplace was on one wall, and from either side of the room, long corridors shot off in different directions. At the opposite end of where he was standing was a rustic dining table. A bar separated the great room from what he supposed was the kitchen area, given the ice cream container and two bowls there.
It was a lovely room, warm and inviting, right out of the pages of Southern Living. But Matt couldnt help noticing, as Grayson pulled him along to follow Jo Lynn (the dogs, too, naturally), that the books on the floor-to-ceiling shelves on either side of the fireplace were arranged by color and height.
That wasnt all. The magazines on the large pine coffee table were fanned out at perfect one-inch intervals, just like a showroom. In the large, spacious kitchen, he could see a cupboard with dish towels stacked neatly by color and folded identically so that they were all of uniform size. Dishes, cups, even salt and pepper shakers were also perfectly placed according to size and color. The appliances, all modern, were gleaming, as if they had never been touched. The floor, which was wood, was spotless. It was
as if some deranged Williams-Sonoma floor crew had attacked this kitchen.
Shes down there on the dock, Jo Lynn said, pointing through the kitchen window. Want me to hold those? she asked, pointing at his enormous bouquet.
Ah, no. No thanks.
Can I go? Grayson asked, still at his side, still clutching his hand.
Tell you what, Gray. Let me talk to your mom for a few minutes, and then you and I will talk. Okay?
But what if you dont come back? he asked, his little fingers squeezing tighter.
Are you kidding? Of course Im coming back! I promise, kiddo! So let go, will you? I promise Ill come back.
Grayson didnt look as if he appreciated Marts promise all that much, and Matt couldnt blame him, given what the little guy had seen and heard from him. But Jo Lynn seemed to understand that this was important, and put a hand on the kids shoulder, reminded him of his ice cream, and he reluctantly let go. Just right on out there, she said to Matt, urging him on.
Matt stepped through a screen door onto the back porch.
Just go on down there, youll find her, Jo Lynn said from behind the screen door, and Matt continued walking with his canine honor guard, down the steps to the grassy lawn below, past a stone barbecue pit beneath live oaks, past the padded lounge chairs beneath the willow tree, and onward, to the dock, which ended in a big square where boats could be tied around the sides. On the square end of the dock, three big white Adirondack chairs sat facing the river, and strung between the four corners of the square were Chinese lanterns and tiki torches. Giant ferns graced the corners, and a small cabinet held towels and sun lotions.
It was surreal, almost Eden-like, Matt thought as he strolled closer to the edge of the dock. A perfect place for a beautiful alien to land. Speaking of beautiful aliens, where was she?
Not on the dock, as Jo Lynn had suggested. Matt stopped at the edge of the dock; his helpful companions all laid down in the shade of a cottonwood, their tongues hanging out as if they had run a marathon. Matt looked downriver, saw nothing, not a person or even a boat. He turned, noticed an old barn or shed, thought it was possible she was doing something in there, and started in that direction.
Only the door to the barn was shut tight, the windows were caked with dirt so he couldnt see inside. It looked like it hadnt been used in years, so Matt circled around the other side of it just to be sure she wasnt back there planting watermelons or building a do-it-yourself doghouse.
As he picked his way around the backside of the barn, he caught sight of her ... and stopped dead in his tracks.
Judas Priest, had he known she looked like that?
She had been swimming, that was why he hadnt seen her, and she had climbed up on the dock, where she was shaking the water from her ears. Standing there, one slender leg slung out, her head tilted to the side, a towel hung from her hand and her long black hair streaked in soft, thick waves down her back. She was wearing a two-piece bathing suit, one that covered everything and left just enough to his exploding imagination. Matt was so entranced by the vision that he did not realize he was moving, did not realize he was groping his way around the side of the barn toward her until one of the dogs suddenly barked.
At which point, the vision of beauty before him looked over her shoulder and shrieked bloody murder.
Naturally, Rebeccas first thought was that a stranger was spying on her, and her knee-jerk reaction was to shriek. But in the next instant she realized it was Matt and a huge bouquet of roses sneaking around the old barn, and her brief, heart-stopping fear turned to nuclear fury.
In fact, her fury was so nuclear, she could hardly get her clothes on, and was hopping around the dock on one leg like a crazy loon as she tried to stuff the other leg into her shorts without tumbling right back into the river. All the while, Matt was striding toward her, waving his hand and the flowers, saying something she couldnt hear because she was so desperate to clothe herself.
The moment he stepped onto the dock (with her traitor dogs behind him, howdoyoudo), she yelled, Dont you dare come near me! And proceeded to get tangled up in the T-shirt she was so frantically trying to pull over her head.
Rebecca, please just give me a minute! she heard him say as she managed to get her head through.
With one arm caught in the fabric, she pointed with her free arm. Stop right there!
Im sorry I frightened you, he said, holding out the roses as some sort of peace offering. Really. I was looking for you
I dont care! she snapped as she managed to punch her arm free of the T-shirt, pull it down, then dig her hair out of the neck. Whatever you think youre doing, you can turn around and march right back to the rock you crawled out from!
Okay, I will. Just let me just say a couple of things, he tried again, and stood there, holding the flowers upside down now, looking so goddamn good and completely repentant but oh no, oh nonono ... he had sorely underestimated the strength of her fun, and her mouth was moving before she could think.
You want to say a couple of things? she seethed. Like you havent already said enough? Jesus God, what did you forget? Between Im a bad mother and Im trying to stab you in the back, what could there possibly be left to say? Just speaking those transgressions aloud infuriated her even more, and without really knowing what she was doing, Rebecca gave into her furious anger as she abruptly picked up the soda can Jo Lynn or Grayson had left behind and threw it at him.
Matt easily ducked it, but looked at her like she was deranged. Hey ... he started, but she threw the core of Graysons apple at him before he could say a single, solitary word. Hey! he shouted as the core bounced off his boot, which caused Frank to rise from lounging in the shade and trot over and have a look.
Just get out! she shouted, madly looking around for something else to throw. I told you I never wanted to see you again, and believe me, Ive heard everything I ever want to hear from you, you ... you
Go ahead and say it, because whatever it is, I deserve it and then some, he offered.
D1CKHEAD! she obliged him.
Ouch, Matt said with a wince. Good one. I was sort of hoping for your run-of-the-mill asshole, but okay. So now that youve got that off your chest, may I please try
and apologize? he asked, holding up the flowers again.
How dare you make light of it!
Im not, I swear Im not. Im just trying
You dont get it, Matt! I dont want to hear your stupid apology! Rebecca shouted. I dont want anything to do with you! I dont want your constant judgment, or your bizarre paranoia, or the arrogance you take everywhere you go!
All right. Okay, he said, dragging a hand through his hair as he helplessly looked around the dock. Youre so right, Ive been very arrogant, and I swear to God, Rebecca, I didnt even realize it. But now that I do, I feel a hundred times worse, so will you please let me talk?
No! No, no, no, asshole!
Wait just a minute, Matt said, putting one hand on his waist. A dickhead and an asshole? I mean, I was wrong and all that, but arent you sort of stretching it a little?
Arrogant, impudent backwater asshole Rebecca heaved a cheap synthetic rubber thong at him, which floated close enough to hit him in the chest before wafting down to the ground. Matt looked down at her thong, then slowly lifted his head with a look that made her heart skip a beat. Thats not helping, he said low, so stop it. I am trying to tell you something.
I dont want to hear it! she said, and picked up the other thong; Matt instantly pointed a long and menacing bouquet at her. If you throw that, you better be prepared for the consequences, missy!
Missy? She couldnt help herself; she gave a shout of maniacal laughter. Spare me! What consequences? What are you going to do, throw me in the river?
Of course Im not going to throw you in the river!
Then what? Remind me of how empty I am? she shouted, and instantly caught a sob in her throat that surprised the hell out of hersurprised her so much that she lost track of what she was saying and put a hand to her throat, swallowing that lousy sob down as she stumbled back a step. It took a moment before she could look at him again, and when she did, she could see, even across the
distance between them, the remorseful sorrow in his gray eyes, and quickly closed her eyes before she let his remorse seep in, desperately reminding herself that she didnt want his stinking apology. She was done with him! She was done, goddammit!
That, he said hoarsely, was a horrible, inexcusable thing for me to have said. And even more importantly, it was a goddamn lie.
Yes it was a lie! Rebecca opened her eyes.
I have no excuse, other than to say I was really angry that afternoon, and I... unfortunately, I took it out on you.
Thats not exactly news, she said miserably, looking down at the thong she still clutched in her hand. Do you always take your anger out on others?
He shook his head, looked at the flowers for a moment. 1 guess Im like most losers in that regard I didnt take my anger out on someone I didnt care about, someone like Tom. I took it out on someone who really matters to me. Seems ass backward, but its the truth. Im sorry, Rebecca. I was so... wrong.
Even though she could hear the contrition in his voice, she couldnt let it be that easily tucked away. Give me a break, she said, waving the thong dismissively at him. You don t care about me! You care about your career and how you come off to the world! And if you and I get along in the meantime, thats great, another notch in your bedpost. But the bottom line is you, Matt. Its all about you, and you know what? Youre just like all the rest.
Hey! he protested sharply. What I did was wrong, and you have every right to be angry, but dont lump me in with all the rest of the sorry dogs youve known!
Why shouldnt I? You act just like all of the sorry dogs Ive known!
He pressed his lips together, then blew out a hot breath. Yeah, well, while were at it, you can act like a stuck-up beauty queen. One minute you leave me with a promise, and the next moment Im twisting in the wind. It was all a game to you.
That may be your perception, but I never said it was anything more than what it was a little fun.
A little fun? he all but choked. I felt and I saw something when I looked at you and when I kissed you, Rebecca! If you want to say that was just a little fun, then youre a liar!
Im not!
Like hell you arent! Christ, you know I love you, but youre too chickenshit to admit that maybe you feel something, too! Youre too goddamn scared to let yourself just be
He struck a nerve in her so raw that she reacted without thinking and hurled the other thong at him.
Matt dodged it, lowered his head. That does it, he said, and started toward her, gripping the bouquet like a weapon.
Rebecca instantly backed up, bumping into Adirondack chairs. Dont come near me! she cried as he came striding forward, her worthless mutts lying in the shade, watching complacently instead of protecting her.
Try and stop me! he snapped, and in one long stride, he reached her, his fingers closing around her wrist. She tried to wrench free, knocking the bouquet of roses from his hand; they scattered across the dock, some falling to the river below as she struggled to free her arm. But Matt was too strong for her; he pulled her roughly into his chest, his arms circled around her like a vice, and his mouth crushed down on hers, kissing her with as much fury as she felt, his tongue sweeping deep inside as he curled his fist into her wet hair to hold her head back so that he could kiss her like that, kiss her so she couldnt breathe, kiss her until she couldnt feel anything but him, his body hard against hers, his arms locking her to him, his lips brutally soft, and the tendrils of the emotion in his words twining around her heart, holding it captive.