Authors: Maria E. Monteiro
“I think your sister has finally decided on a theme and a florist making my life a little easier,” my mom says, walking into the kitchen interrupting my happy thoughts.
“Where is she?”
“On her way back to the city.” She looks up at the ceiling and exhales. “Okay we need to talk.”
Oh-oh I don’t think I’m going to like this.
“What’s going on with you and Austin?”
“I already told you nothing,” I lie. I don’t know why I’m scared to tell her the truth. “We’re just friends.”
“Since when? Because the last thing I knew you couldn’t stand him.”
“I don’t know. We just started talking again and I forgave him for what he did when we were kids. Mom, people change.”
“I know. I just don’t want you to get hurt again.” I know she means well, but this time she’s wrong. I really believe Austin will not hurt me again. At least I hope he won’t.
The doorbell rings saving me from this conversation. “That must be Tony.” Oh God, why is he here again? Can’t they go more than one day without seeing each other?
My mother disappears into the foyer. I hope they don’t expect me to eat dinner with them again. I’m running out of excuse to get out of the house when he’s around.
“Jade!” my mother calls.
“What?”
“It’s for you.” For me? Ohmigod its Austin!
The butterflies in my stomach begin to flutter as I quickly make my way to the front door. I’m really going to have to explain this to my mother later.
I turn the corner and instead of seeing Austin I see Logan standing at the door talking to my mother. Why doesn’t she let him in?”
“Hey,” I say. His eyes sharply look at me and I know immediately this is not a good visit.
“Well I’ll let you two talk,” my mother says, and walks back into the kitchen.
“Come in,” I utter, afraid of what he’s about to unleash on me.
“No. I rather talk to you outside.
“Okay.” I step outside. “What’s up?”
“I can’t believe you. How could you be dating him? You kept telling me nothing was going on and all this bullshit, and now you’re dating him! You know what he did to me!” His voice is razor sharp.
“I know, but like I tried to tell you before all that stuff with Olivia was not his fault. He didn’t know you guys were dating.”
“Who gives a fuck! He’s still an asshole. He’s gonna hurt you Jade and I’m not sticking...”
“Don’t say it. Because after you say it you can’t take it back.” I close my eyes and inhale. “Logan, I thought you said you were going to be okay with my decision to be with him.”
He shakes his head in anger. “That’s because I didn’t really think you were going enter into a real relationship with that asshole. I don’t understand why you’re being so stupid.”
“I’m not being stupid. Logan, I like him...a lot. I don’t wanna lose your friendship over this but...”
“Don’t say it, because after you say it you can’t take it back,” he repeats my words sending chills up and down my back.
“So where do we go from here?” my voice cracks. Fighting with Logan hurts so much. It brings me back to being that ten year old girl who’s just lost her best friend. Why can’t things just be easy?
We both look into each other’s eyes not knowing what to say next. I don’t want to lose his friendship, but at the same time I can’t let go of Austin to safe it. I wish he could just understand and be supportive.
“I don’t know. I’ll see you in school.” He gets in his car and drives off as I stand on my front steps with my sunken heart beating weakly. I hope this is not the end of us.
Logan stays away from me for most of the week. But by Friday he actually starts talking to me again. Okay, he doesn’t really say much. He basically just asked me if I was going to the game. When I told him I wouldn’t miss watching him play he smiled. I’m not giving up on us. I can’t. I need him as much as I need Austin.
Farrah and I sit in the same spot we sat the last time. Austin looks so good out there. I swear number 24 is becoming my favorite number.
He runs for twenty-five yards and gets our team another first down. Leah cheers louder than any other cheerleader and then turns to look my way. I try my best to ignore her. I’m not going to let her get to me anymore.
The one person I am having a hard time ignoring is Austin’s dad. Instead of cheering with everyone else he complains how Austin’s mistakes got him tackled and prevented him from running any further.
I get a cold chill listening to him complain about each move Austin makes. His voice is so loud you can’t help but listen each comment.
We begin to lose the game and his rants become louder and ruder. I want to run onto the field and save Austin from all his comments.
By the time the game ends my head hurts from all the negative remarks he’s been making. I’m happy we won the game, I would hate to see what he’d be like if we’d lost.
Austin walks off to the sideline after thanking the other team for a good game. His jaw tightens when he sees his father walking towards him. He’s probably going to point out everything Austin did wrong.
I can’t move as I watch him just nod his head while the rest of his team celebrates the win. He finally glances up at me and his face softens as a warm smile appears. My heart immediately begins to flutter. I can’t stand how cute he is.
His father follows Austin’s eyes and glares at me before hitting Austin on the chest to bring back his attention to his lecture.
“Come on lets go. I wanna go congratulate Josh.” Farrah has been hanging out with him again. In fact I hardly see her anymore. I haven’t said anything to her because I know exactly how she feels. I want to spend all my free time with Austin too.
“He was awesome tonight,” Farrah says, pushing through the people to get to the field.
“Yes he was. And don’t forget Logan, he was also really good tonight.” Thanks to all his tackles the other team didn’t get to score as much.
“And don’t forget your honey Austin,” she teases.
“Shut up.”
The field it’s packed with fans congratulating the team.
“Did you guys enjoy my tackles?” Logan asks, puffing up his chest and walking towards us like he’s Superman.
“You were okay,” Farrah jokes, looking at him likes she wasn’t impressed. She gives him a quick hug and runs off to congratulate Josh.
“You were amazing,” I say, giving him a tight hug hoping he doesn’t reject me. He squeezes me back. I wish things weren’t so weird between us.
I quickly glance around to see if I can find Austin, but they’re too many people around us, making it impossible to spot him.
Logan lets out an irrigated breath. “He’s already in the locker room.”
“I wasn’t...”
“Yeah, right. Well I better go get changed.” Damn, why did I do that in front of him? Now he’s mad at me again.
“Are you heading to the party with us?” Farrah asks him coming back to stand next to me.
“Yeah. I’ll meet you guys in the parking lot,” he calls out disappearing into the crowd. I hope he gets over this soon, because I don’t know how much longer I can take it.
Farrah and I sit in her car singing our hearts out to Parmore’s song
Still into You
. Farrah leans in and lowers the music. “I have to tell you something, but you can’t judge me or say anything.”
“What’s up? Is this about Josh?”
“Yes.”
“What happen?”
“I slept with him,” she blurts out, and digs her face into her hands waiting for my reaction.
“What?”
“Please don’t judge me,” she says, still hiding behind her hands.
“I’m not. I mean, where you careful?” I have no idea what to say to her. A part of me knows she only did it to get him to like her. I really hope he’s not using her.
She removes her hands off her face. “Of course I was. Jade, it was amazing...I know I’m stupid for sleeping with him without being in a relationship or anything.”
“Why did you do it?”
“I don’t’ know it just happened...Oh God, please don’t say anything to Austin or even worse Logan.”
“Of course not. I won’t say anything to anyone.”
“Won’t say anything to who?” Logan asks, jumping into the backseat.
“Nothing,” we both say at the same time.
“Whatever. Anyway Jade, Austin told me to tell you he’ll meet you at the party. He has to go home first. I guess he thinks I’m you’re personal messaging service and forgot what a phone is for,” Logan snaps.
“I let him know not to send messages through you anymore,” I bark, then turn around and put the music up. I can’t stand his attitude anymore.
By the time we get to the beach everyone is there. Farrah spots Josh right away and can’t help to form a huge smile when he calls her over. “I’ll see you guys later,” she says and runs off to where he’s standing.
“Okay. Be careful!” I call out. I can’t believe she slept with him. I really hope she doesn’t end up getting hurt.
“So, he’s finally paying attention to here again, huh?” Logan says, walking alongside me.
“Yeah. I hope this a good thing.”
“Me too. You know being the only guy in this three-way friendship is really hard. I always have to watch after you guys.”
“You love it,” I tease wrapping my arm into his.
“Yeah right.” He sweetly smiles. “Okay maybe a little.” For a minute I feel like I have the old Logan back. He’s not mad and is actually being nice to me.
“Hi Logan,” Becky, Summer’s friend, says approaching us. She can’t stop smiling as she bats her eyes.
“What’s up?” he responds putting his hands in his front pockets.
“You were really good tonight.” She twirls her red hair around her finger. I’m beginning to feel like the third wheel.
“Thanks. Umm...a...is my sister with you?” I feel his muscles tense. Ohmigod I think he’s actually nervous.
“Yeah, she’s over there with Mason and Lexi.”
“Cool. A...a...so how’s freshman year treating you?” He runs his fingers through his sun kissed blond hair. This is so weird I never seen him like this. He’s usually calm and collective. Maybe I should give them space to talk.
As a sign from above I spot Austin walking onto the beach. I can’t believe how crazy my heart goes every time I see him “Um, I’m gonna go meet Austin. I’ll see you later.”
“Of course you are,” Logan spits out reminding me how much he hates my relationship. “When are you gonna realize what an asshole that guy is?”
My face crumples. A few minutes ago he was being so nice and caring now he’s treating me like public enemy number one.
“I like him, Logan. Why can’t you understand?”
He shakes his head in anger. “Because I can’t. Just go be with your fucking asshole and leave me the hell alone"
I bite my bottom lip to keep from crying. He words are like a sharp knife piercing my heart. I spin around and run away.
I rush into Austin’s arms and just bury my head into his chest. “Are you okay?” he asks.
“Can we just get away from here?”
“Yeah, come on.”
He grabs my hand and begins to lead me to the other side of the beach. The further we walk away the easier it is to hear the sound of the ocean. We finally find a spot where the only light is from the crescent moon. It looks so beautiful over the black ocean.
Austin sits on the sand and then pulls me down to sit between his legs. His arms quickly wrap around me, bringing me warmth from the cold air, He digs his chin into my shoulder and asks, “What happen back there?”
“Just dealing with Logan. Whatever. I’m just glad you’re here.”
“Me too. This is what I’ve been waiting for all day.” He plants his lips on my cheek and gives me a kiss removing all the piercing pain from my heart.
“You really were amazing tonight.”
“Thanks. My dad didn’t think so, but then again he never does.”
“Is your dad ever supportive?”
“Not really. He doesn’t really bother me about going out and my personal life, but with school and sports he’s like a drill sergeant. He takes all the fun out of playing football or any kind of sport.”
“Are you planning to play next year in college?” I ask looking out to the horizon.
“Hell no. I mean I could if UT wanted me for football, but I rather not. My dad would probably fly out to each one of my games to torment me. I think that’s why Blake doesn’t play either.”
“University of Texas? Huh! I can’t believe you still wanna go there.”
“Yeah. I guess it’s in my blood. My dad went there, and so did his brothers. The only thing Blake didn’t do perfect was go to Braden University instead of UT.”
“Did he get into UT?”
“He didn’t apply. My brother followed his high school girlfriend to Braden. My dad was furious and almost didn’t pay for his school. But in the end he caved. I guess it all worked out because Blake is succeeding there.”
I can’t believe Blake followed a girl to school. He doesn’t seem the type. I didn’t even know he had a girlfriend in high school. In fact I always thought he was a commitment-phobic. I guess I was wrong. “Are they still together?”
“Nah. They broke up two weeks after he started school. But trust me my brother bounced back.” He hugs me tighter. “I don’t wanna talk about him anymore. I just wanna enjoy being with you.” I turn around to meet his brown eyes glowing as he stares at me. “You are so beautiful.”
I turn my whole body around digging my legs under his arms. All these emotions running through me are really starting to scare me. I don’t want to believe I’m just a game but at the same time theirs a part of me that is scared to fall completely for him, especially knowing this time next year he’ll be so far away. “This is still so weird.”
“What?”
“Us being together. I keep expecting for you to tell me it’s all a joke.”
He shakes his head. “What am I going to have to do to prove I’m really into you?”
“I want to believe you, but when I keep having people warn me about you, or tell I’m just the flavor of the week I get scared.”
He furrows his brows. “Who told you, you’re just the flavor of the week?”
“It doesn’t matter.” I drop my gaze.
He puts his hand on my chin and lifts my face up forcing me to look at him in the eyes again. “I’m here with you because I want to be with you, and not just for a week or two. Can’t you see I’m falling for you? I want you to be my girlfriend.”