Because of You (2 page)

“Yes. I told her last night.” No wonder she looked so unhappy today, my poor mother. “She agreed I could be the one to tell you girls. Carrie, Trisha and me are in love. We want to have a family together.”

Each word coming out of his mouth pierces my body with pure venom draining every drop of life out of me. “Excuse me,” I mumble, trying to get out of the booth. Carrie stands up and allows my escape.

I look at my father and want to yell at him,
“You already have a family! You just fucked it up by leaving us for her! I hope you and your new child will be very happy together!”
But I don’t say anything. Instead I begin to walk towards the door. I need to get out of here.

“Jade! Where are you going? Come back here right now!” My father orders, making everyone in the restaurant turn and stare at me. I take a deep breath and take off running before anyone can see me cry like a bawling baby.

I run out the door into the hot sticky August night air just as my tears begin to stream down my face. How can my father do this to us? Aren’t Carrie and me enough for him? How could he think this was something to celebrate? I will never forgive him for this.

I continue running, trying to breath in the thick air. I run down the parking lot until SMACK! My body bounces right off someone’s hard chest and fall backwards onto the inflexible wet ground.

“Whoa! Are you okay?” I hear a deep voice ask. He gives me his warm hand and helps me up.

“Yeah,” I answer, as the pain throbbing in my chest now travels down my body.

“Are you sure?” I look up at him and roll my eyes in revulsion. Why out of everyone in the world, do I have to bump into Austin Evans? He makes me sick.

His dark eyes narrow with concern and I remember I have tears in my eyes. He must think he’s the one who hurt me.

I yank my arm out of his grip. “Yeah. I’m fine.”

“Look, if you’re hurt...”

“I said I’m fine.” I continue to walk down the parking lot. I have no idea where I’m going. My dad drove so it’s not like I have a ride. Damn it!

“Hey,” Austin calls out running behind me.

“What?” I don’t stop walking.

“You don’t look like you’re okay. Do you need me to call someone for you? Or...”

“No. Just leave me alone,” I spit out, without looking back. I don’t need this right now. All I want to do is crawl under my covers and cry my eyes out.

“Where’re you going?”

I don’t say a word.

“Do you...”

“Austin!" A girl calls out. This time we both stop walking and look back at Leah Turner with her lips twisted up into a phony smile. Of course it’s her! Where ever Austin is Leah is sure to follow. “Where are you going?”

“Nowhere. I was just making sure that umm...” He looks at me once again acting like he doesn’t know my name. He’s so full of shit. I can’t stand him.

“Jade,” I remind him.

His look of concern disappears as the corners of his mouth point up producing an annoying smile. “I know who you are, Jade Miller.”

Does he want an award or something for remembering my whole name?

“Are you sure you’re okay?”

“She looks fine,” Leah calls out trying her best to sound sweet.

Leah and me do not have a good relationship. She blames me for our cheerleading team losing at finals last year. It’s not my fault I walked out half way through the routine. My dad had just sat down with Trisha, and instead of watching his daughter cheer he was too busy shoving his old tongue into her disgusting mouth. Just another thing my father is responsible for ruining.

“Look, she’s right. I’m fine,” I reassure him, wanting to get away from him and this moment.

“Where are you going?” he asks.

“Home.” I turn around and continue to walk away from him.

He follows right behind me again. “Do you need a ride?”

“Aren’t you on a date or something?”

“What? No. I’m meeting a couple of friends, but it’s okay. I can take you home.” I spin back around to see him smile again making his dimples appear. I hate those damn things. They drive all the girls at school wild, but they have the opposite affect on me.

A long time ago Austin was my best friend. He was the person who I shared all my secrets with. He was the person who knew I broke my sister’s iPod. He was the person who held me when my grandma died. He knew everything about me as I knew everything about him. But that was six years ago. Now all I know about him is his growing list of hook ups, while all he knows about me is my name.

“Jade!" I turn my head and see my sister marching out of the restaurant with the same tears I had in my eyes. “This is all bullshit. Come on, Mom is on her way. I told her we’d meet her across the street.”

Austin’s face falls. “I guess you don’t need that ride.”

“No. I don’t.”

I begin to walk towards my sister. “Hey Jade?”

I whirl back around to face him. “Yeah?” What the hell does he want now?

“There’s a party on the beach tomorrow night. Are you going?”

“I don’t know. Why?”

“I just thought it might help cheer you up. You can never be sad at a party.” He smiles his big goofy smile again. “Maybe we can hang out.”

Did he really just say that? “I don’t think so.”

“Why? Is it cause your boyfriend will get mad?”

“No. It’s because I can’t stand you!" I turn back around and stomp away. I’m not in the mood to inform him Garret and I broke up two weeks ago.

2

Not You Again

I enter my mother’s car with my heart still racing. I can’t believe I was just talking to Austin Evans. The last time I spoke to him he was apologizing for teasing and tormenting me, after I stupidly kissed him. Kissing him was one of the biggest mistakes I ever made. I know I was only ten years old but it still embarrasses me. There’s nothing I regret more than that kiss.

“Are you girls okay?” My mother asks, driving away from the restaurant.

“We’re fine. How about you? How are you feeling?” Carrie asks.

“I’m okay. I’m sorry I didn’t warn you girls, but your father made me promise not to say anything.” She takes a deep breath in and calms her shaky voice. “We’ll get through this just like we’ve gotten through everything else.”

My mother was basically destroyed when my father walked out of our house after confessing his infidelity to her. She locked herself in her room for two months not wanting to do anything but cry and sleep. Carrie and I both took turns taking care of her.

She kept saying she wanted us to move out of Cisco Beach. She didn’t want to live in the same town as my father and that woman. I didn’t blame her. I wanted to get away from them too. I still do.

After the two months she walked out of her room as if nothing happened. She began to dedicate all her time to her business. My mother runs one of the biggest wedding and event planning companies around here.

Everyday she goes to work early and comes home late. I hardly see her but when I do she always looks like something is missing, and I know exactly what or who I should say that is—my father.

He’s ruined everything. I’m not sure I’ll ever get over this. Every time I’ll see that thing growing in that witch’s stomach I will be reminded how much I hate him.

“What do you have in the bag?” My mother asks Carrie. I didn’t even notice she was carrying anything, but the smell lets me know exactly what it is.

“Enough steak and lobster for a feast.”

“I can’t believe you waited for the food,” I state, actually proud of her.

“Listen, if Dad chose our favorite restaurant to share his horrible news the least I could do is have him buy us a very expensive dinner.”

“You girls are terrible,” my mother says, actually laughing now. I can’t help but laugh too, even though sadness and rage swims through my veins.

I’ve been moping around the house not really wanting to smile. My mother and Carrie are tired of my sad face so they’ve convinced me to go to the party tonight. My mother is even lending me her car. She says the party will help get things off my mind. I doubt it will, but it’s worth a try.

“I can’t believe you’re going to the party. I thought I was gonna have to beg you to come out with me tonight,” Farrah says sitting with her legs crisscrossed on my bed.

“Yeah, well I thought I’d have some fun before we start school next week.” I put my dark brown hair up in a ponytail with a headband to pull all my loose hair back. “Is Logan meeting us here or at the party?”

Farrah and Logan are my best friends. They’re both as different as night and day but somehow still mesh well together. At the same time they also love to argue, mostly about what I should do with my life.

“He’s meeting us there. He had to work until closing.”

“Great, now I feel bad. He’s covering my shift.” I apply purple eyeliner over my eyelid making my sea green eyes pop.

“I’m sure he’s okay,” Farrah states, twirling her long straight dark blond hair around her finger. “So how did it go with your dad last night? You never told me.”

“Fine.” I really don’t want to share the details with her right now. I know if I start talking about it I’ll become depressed all over again.

“Cool. So, do you think Garret will be there tonight?”

“I hope not. I’m not in the mood to run into him.” Who am I kidding of course he’ll be there. It’s a party and Garret never misses a party.

“I still don’t know why you guys broke up.”

“It’s complicated.” I don’t want to talk about that either. In fact if I could go the rest of my life not having to think about Garret again I will be a very happy girl. Well, as happy as I can be.

Farrah walks over to the white bench by my window and kneels on it to peek outside. “God, he’s hot!”

“Who?” I ask, applying mascara.

“Austin Evans. You don’t know how lucky you are to live right across the street from him"

“He’s a major asshole!”

“If I lived here all I would do is spend my days and nights spying on him.”

“You’re crazy. Trust me if you really knew him you wouldn’t.”

“One day you’ll get over whatever he did to you when you were kids.” Farrah moved to Cisco Beach when she was twelve, so she doesn’t really know the history Austin and I shared. She just knows I can’t stand him.

“I am over it. I just can’t stand him. Besides look what he did to Logan last year.”

“Yeah, that was fucked up. But what did he do to you? And don’t tell me you don’t wanna talk about it. We’ve been friends for over four years and you never wanna talk about anything.” She walks over to my bed and throws herself on it. “So spill it. We’re not leaving until you do. Tell me what Austin Evans did to make you hate him so much?”

I roll my eyes. I really hate reliving the past, but I know she won’t ever stop asking me if I don’t tell her. The truth is telling her might help me get rid off his stupid smug face that keeps wanting to reappear in my head.

“We used to be good friends. In fact he was my best friend. It didn’t matter that he was a year older than me. All we did was hang out with each other.” I begin.

“Really? Well what happened?”

“We got older and he started hanging out with his friends from school.”

“And?”

“And that’s it. We parted ways,” I lie.

“Oh no you don’t! Come on Jade just tell me already,” she begs.

“Okay, fine.” I close my eyes and relive the childhood memory I wish I could erase from my brain. “I don’t know if it’s because I was losing Austin to his friends or something else, but all of a sudden I began to like him.”

“You mean like him, like him?”

“Yup. I, for some stupid unexplainable reason, began to get a crush on Austin. And because of it I started acting weird around him, mostly because I was scared he would find out. Whatever. Anyway on his eleventh birthday he was extra nice to me or so I thought. I really believed he felt the same way I did. So, I took a stupid chance and kissed him on the lips in front of all his friends.”

“What?! You kissed Austin Evans?” She jumps up onto her knees, as her honey brown eyes look as if they are going to pop out of her skull.

I nod yes, trying my best to ignore the anger festering inside of me.

“How was it?”

“Terrible.”

“Terrible?!”

“Yes. Maybe not the kiss itself, but what happened next was. He pulled away from me and became furious. His friends began to laugh and Austin yelled at me and told me to leave him alone. He told me he no longer wanted to be my friend. And after he began to make fun of me in front of his 6
^th
grade friends. He no longer wanted to be friends with me.”

“What an asshole.”

“I told you.”

“Okay, but he still has hot friends, especially Josh Merritt.”

“I guess. Look, I’m done with this trip down memory lane. You ready to go?”

“Can we stop at the store first? I wanna get some gum in case this is the night I finally get Josh to notice me.”

“You’re crazy! Lets go.” I’m planning to have a good time tonight, and maybe forget for a while everything that’s happened in my life last night and six years ago.

Music swims into my ears as we get closer to the beach. We both step out of my car. The cool ocean breeze blows my loose floral shirt up. I can’t believe how chilly it’s out after it being so hot last night. I pull my red sweatshirt out of the car and put it on. I think my most favorite outfits are sweatshirts and shorts. I wish I could wear them all year long.