Becoming His: The Teaching of Rebecca (2 page)

Rebecca felt her heart clench as he lectured her.  She felt tears flow down her cheeks.  She mourned for her parents anew.  They had shown her nothing but love and kindness and she knew they would be horrified at her life now.  She had never thought of herself as a princess, never considered herself spoiled or coddled.  Her world had come tumbling down months ago and it seems there were several more bricks to fall before she reached the bare foundation of her life. 

“Yes, definitely, spoiled, disrespectful and somewhat lacking in character I would say.  Perhaps it is best that your family line was so very fragile.  It seems you are most definitely alone in the world now.  No longer will anyone care enough to spoil you.  You will learn miss, believe me, you have many difficult lessons to learn.” 

Rebecca could barely process his words though her face burned with humiliation and shame.   She wondered if her parents had any idea of what sort of man her uncle had been.  She prayed that they had been ignorant of his obvious loathing of their only child. 

Danvers continued.  “Miss Lambert will give you your first lesson for disrespect and rudeness…”   He saw Miss Lambert begin to move but again stilled her with an upraised hand.  “However, before you pay for that mistake, it is my intention to inform you of what your future holds.” 

Rebecca was fighting hard to both control herself as well as to assimilate the threat of a punishment.  What did he mean?  She had heard other girls crying and some screaming behind the closed door of Miss Lambert’s office or their own bedrooms and while she had imagined many horrific scenarios, she herself had no real idea of what transpired behind those doors.  She had found her hands smacked with a ruler on the crime of daydreaming in class, even those occasions had been innocent.  She didn’t daydream.  She just couldn’t force herself to actively participate.  She had withdrawn even deeper into herself, her grief never leaving her.  Her punishments usually amounted to missing dinner while writing essay after essay about obedience and proper decorum.  For some reason, the way in which Mr. Danvers announced the promised punishment told Rebecca that a writing assignment was not what he had in mind and her heart pounded in true fear.  It was with a great effort that she refocused on the words Mr. Danvers was speaking.

“You are a true orphan now Miss Matthews.  There is no one who will speak for you.  You will be turning eighteen in a few months and reach your majority.  You will be allowed to remain in residence until then but only because of my kindness.  Of course, you won’t be allowed to remain as a student.  In your case, I think that is hardly a disappointment seeing as you haven’t yet made a single friend.  Instead, you will be allowed to earn your lodging and meals by working below stairs as a servant.  Perhaps you’ll have better luck learning entirely new lessons.”  He watched as her mind wrapped around his words. 

“But… but surely my uncle left something for me?  I… I… don’t want—”

“It hardly matters what you want young lady.  You have not yet reached your majority and have no rights whatsoever.  You are a child and will do as told.  You will work for your room and board.  I suggest you learn how to serve well or else I’ll have no choice but to turn you out into the streets once you turn eighteen.”  He watched her face fall further, her color high.

“What... where… where would I go?” 

His smile was not pleasant.  He had been running this school for decades and found most of his students easily manipulated and, to an even greater degree, every servant under his roof.  Rebecca, however, was different.  She existed within her own world, her nose usually stuck in a book instead of making any attempt to step out into the world.  Seeing her fear, her confusion made his task that much more pleasant.

“I have no idea and don’t care.  Reports will continue to be given on your progress and if I am not satisfied with them, you will find yourself outside these gates the day of your birthday.  I caution you Miss Matthews, life might not be what you desired inside this school but life outside and alone will be hell.  This world is not a kind place for little girls such as you.” 

Her mind was whirling, her body shaking.  Her entire world had collapsed months ago and though the last six months hadn’t been what she was used to, they were all she had known.  She had no true skills, had no idea of how she would survive if put out.  She looked at Miss Lambert and saw the same evil smile on her face.  The woman would now be her supervisor and according to what she had witnessed of the few servants that helped keep the school clean, she was not a kind woman to work under. 

Mr. Danvers was finished and motioned for Miss Lambert to remove the girl from his office. 

Edna Lambert eagerly stepped forward and immediately grasped the young girl by her upper arm.  Rebecca found herself practically dragged from the room and pulled up the main staircase.  “Mind you, Miss, this is the last time you will be allowed up these stairs.  You will be using the back stairs in the future.” 

Rebecca barely heard her, her thoughts and emotions too jumbled for her to think clearly.  She was hauled down a long corridor past several school rooms where the other residents were engaged in daily lessons.  They continued up another staircase until they reached the living quarters.  Rebecca was dragged into the small room she had occupied since her arrival.  Edna finally released her arm only long enough to point to the small bed.

 “Go ahead, right over now.” 

Rebecca stood frozen and the older woman shook her head. 

“Are you trying to earn extras Rebecca?” 

Rebecca shook her head and saw the woman pull a paddle from her apron pocket.  She gasped suddenly understanding that the woman truly meant to use it on her and the cries and sobs begging for mercy behind closed doors became abundantly clear.  Still, the young woman didn’t make a step towards the bed. 

“My Lord child, haven’t you ever had your bottom spanked?”  Edna was equally shocked when she realized that the answer was obvious.  “Well then, consider this your first lesson.  You are to go to the bed, put your hands on the mattress and bend over.  I suggest you do it now because if I have to position you, it will be far more difficult.” 

Rebecca’s face flamed.  Spanked?  She had never been spanked in her entire life!  She still didn’t move until the woman stepped towards her.  Fearing the look on her face, Rebecca walked to the bed and bent over, her hands planted on top of the neatly made bed.  She was barely in position before she felt a sharp slap against her bottom.  She yelped and stood, her hands going back to rub the injured area. 

Miss Lambert stood with a paddle upraised, obviously ready to deliver another swat.  “How dare you!  You are never to rise before permission is given.  Bend over and stick your bottom out or so help me, I’ll strap you bare!” 

Rebecca did as she was told, too shocked to refuse.  The next several minutes were spent trying not to cry out as the paddle connected again and again with her bottom.  Rebecca pressed her lips as tightly together as possible and managed to remain silent except for an occasional small moan. 

Edna gave her two dozen swats before she returned the paddle to her pocket.  She knew that Rebecca had no idea of what a true spanking would entail.  Even a hundred smacks of her paddle wouldn’t truly hurt the young woman.  Covered as it was with layers of petticoats as well as her dress, Rebecca’s bottom probably wasn’t even pink.  However, she knew the young woman would most certainly find out soon enough.  She tugged the girl upright and turned her to face her.  Rebecca’s face was red with the shame of it but her eyes showed her defiance.  Edna just smiled and then chuckled. 

The sound sent shivers up Rebecca’s spine.  

“Feeling cocky are you now?  Feeling proud of not crying out or making a fuss?  Just you wait.  The next time I have cause to spank you, it will be on your bare bottom and I guarantee you’ll be begging for mercy.  Now, pack your belongings immediately.  You will never be allowed above stairs again unless it is to clean.” 

Rebecca stopped thinking.  It was just too much to handle at the moment.  Her face was hot with the shame of being paddled and the threat of another spanking was more than she could fathom.  This woman obviously hated her through no fault of her own.  The threat of being made to bare her bottom didn’t even register.  Her humiliation at her present condition consumed her.  She was a true orphan, totally alone in the world and hadn’t been given even a moment to herself to consider what that meant.  Instead she had just been paddled and ordered about. 

She wordlessly began to pack her belongings into the one small valise she had brought to the school.  The wardrobe contained most of her dresses and Rebecca was informed to leave them. 

“I will see that they are packed into your trunks.  You will have no need for such fancy clothing below stairs.  Now stop dawdling or do I need to give your bottom another lesson in obedience?” 

Rebecca glanced at the wardrobe as if longing to open its doors, not for the clothing but to climb inside and hide from her new world.  However, the threat of another spanking caused her to shove the last of her things into the valise and buckle it closed.  Miss Lambert nodded and then, taking her firmly by the arm again, led her from the room.  Rebecca shook her off and ran back into the room, dropping to her knees to reach under her bed.  Edna was furious at the girl’s rebellion as saw that she was now clutching some book.  Edna tried to snatch it away but Rebecca maintained her grip and then stepped out of the room for the last time.

“Now, I’m ready Miss Lambert,” Rebecca said as proudly as she could.  Edna growled as she grabbed the girl’s upper arm, “You have no idea, none at all.” 

Rebecca’s heart pounded in fear and she glanced back to the only refuge she had known since the death of her parents.  Tears filled her eyes but she refused to let them fall.  Blinking hard, she silently said good-bye to yet another home.

CHAPTER 2

Rebecca was led to a door at the very end of the hallway.  She had never gone through the door but wasn’t surprised to find a narrow flight of stairs.  She was practically drug down the stairs but with one hand gripping the handle of her valise and the other holding tight to her book, she had no choice.  They climbed down landing after landing passing many doors.  At the very end of the stairs, Edna opened the final door and led her young charge into a large kitchen.  Rebecca was amazed at the activity and the heat of the room.  Several young girls and women were busy working.  A few of the youngest girls were toiling over a large wash basin obviously washing clothes.  Each had a kerchief tied around their hair, their aprons and dresses wet and clinging to them. 

Rebecca saw them look up before quickly returning to their task.  Rebecca realized she had never truly thought about how her clothing was cleaned.  It was always simply collected weekly and returned to her room, pressed and folded into drawers or hung in her wardrobe. 

She looked to see another area where older women were busy with pots and pans bubbling on the large stove or working on a center table rolling out dough or preparing items to be cooked.  She knew they must be the ones who put the food on the table three times a day plus the afternoon tea that was served.  Seeing the enormous amount of food piled up to be peeled and cut shocked her.  Meals appeared on the table, were eaten or pushed aside and the diner simply left when satisfied or time for meals was over.  She had never wondered how the food was prepared for the many students as well as the faculty. 

During her childhood she had been a pet of their cook and housekeeper and was just now realizing how much work must have been involved in their daily lives though they had never seemed hurried or cross with their small charge.  She continued to stare at the bustling people in the room.  She saw others sweeping and cleaning as needed while a young boy was struggling to carry huge pails of scraps out of the door.  Another boy was busy stacking firewood next to a giant fireplace.  She immediately began to sweat in the overheated room. 

She looked to see Miss Lambert smiling down at her.  She flushed knowing the woman was enjoying her discomfort.  The woman called for attention.  Everyone stopped their work and looked up but remained silent and Rebecca understood this woman was obviously in charge of more than just the students.

“This is Rebecca.” 

Rebecca felt diminished immediately.  She was no longer Miss Matthews.  Her status had fallen upon her uncle’s death. 

“Rebecca used to be one of our students but her current situation has caused quite a decline in her station.” 

Rebecca blushed hotly, her hand tightening around the handle of her valise.  She saw several of the servants look at her in curiosity. 

Edna continued.  “By the grace of Mr. Danvers she has been given a position below stairs.  I assure you she has no knowledge of how to do anything.  Mrs. Williams, please show Rebecca to her cot and then you may start her on the lowest of cleaning duty.  She has already received her very first paddling for disrespect and disobedience today.  I’m sure she is anxious to avoid another though I require to be informed of any cause for discipline as usual.” 

Rebecca saw several heads bow as if the people in the room were afraid of drawing unwanted attention to themselves. 

Edna continued, “Rebecca will start at the beginning and perhaps become useful in sweeping the floors and cleaning the chamber pots of her former classmates.” 

Rebecca’s face grew even hotter.  She knew the woman was attempting to humiliate her as much as possible but she refused to show any emotion.  Edna turned away and after yet another condescending glance at Rebecca, left her among the staff. 

Rebecca watched as a plump woman with grey hair surrounding her round face wiped her hands on her apron.  She looked at the door where Miss Lambert had disappeared before saying, “Welcome Rebecca.” 

Rebecca felt tears prick her eyes at the unexpected kindness in the woman’s voice. 

“My name is Mrs. Williams and I am in charge of running the kitchen.  We will have time for proper introductions later but for now, let’s get you settled and into your uniform shall we?”