Before You Go (18 page)

Jude understood. Some things take time. No one could wish the hurt away. They walked back to the car. There was a parking ticket on the windshield. They had lingered too long under the boat. Jude paused beside Becka, reading the ticket over her shoulder. “I’ll pay it,” he offered.

“Sold,” she answered, stuffing the ticket into his shorts pocket.

“Listen, do you mind if I stay?” he asked.

“Stay? Here?”

Jude jerked his head toward the Atlantic. “I want to hang around, see the sunrise.”

“I have to get back before my parents—”

“No, I know,” Jude said. “But will you be okay, driving home alone?”

“You really want to stay here by yourself? Won’t your folks freak? How will you get home?”

“I’ve got my cell,” Jude said, patting his front pocket. “I’ll call ’em. Seriously, they’ll probably just assume I’m asleep.”

Becka looked from Jude’s face to the ocean beyond, light beginning to soften the horizon. “I wish I could stay with you.”

“Another time, maybe,” Jude said.

Becka bit her lip, nodded. “I’d like that, Jude.” She pointed to the west. “Look! A shooting star.”

They watched it burn across the sky.

“Can I borrow that blanket?” Jude asked. “And do you have any more food in there?”

Becka rummaged through the backseat and uncovered a half-eaten bag of Doritos. “Here’s some orangey goodness for you. It’s loaded with vitamin C.”

“Really?”

“No, it’s pure garbage,” Becka laughed, “but very tasty.”

Jude leaned in, kissed Becka on the forehead.

“Be good,” she said, climbing into the car.

“I’ll call you, okay?”

She rolled down the window, nodded once, waved.

He watched her drive away, his heart quivering with new hope. Jude pulled the blanket around his shoulders, turned back to the shore.

He drifted eastward along the surf until he found himself standing alone, no one in sight except for a few fishermen, just now arriving from the parking lot. He stood, reflective, remembering how Lily used to splash in the water, and that wild banshee squeal of hers like an exalted, silly goose. Just a four-year-old girl. He could feel his cheeks lift to a smile.

Jude walked ankle-deep, then shin-deep, into the ocean. The water was surprisingly cold, biting. The waves had quieted, rolled in light and regular, more like an ambitious lake than a vengeful sea. Last night’s storm had passed.

He didn’t know what would happen with Becka. Maybe that’s why he needed to be alone on the beach, to watch the sunrise, to be okay with himself, despite everything. Sometimes life seemed impossibly hard, full of car wrecks and souls that shined like stars in yellow dresses. So much heartbreak and undertow. Jude bent down, picked up a smooth white stone, measured its heft in his hand. And he reached back to cast that rock as far as he could.

Just to see the splash.

AUTHOR’S NOTE

The initial idea for this book—the car crash as a pivot point, the central fact in the lives of these teenage characters—came at a time when I was teaching my oldest son how to drive. An accident on the road is every parent’s nightmare. Yet it happens everywhere, and too often ends in heartbreak.

Some quick stats according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention: Motor vehicle crashes are the leading cause of death for U.S. teens. Teen drivers, ages 16–19, are four times more likely to crash than older drivers.

We all know that drinking and driving don’t mix; and texting, too. Studies show that the presence of teen passengers increases the risk, as does driving at night, when the rate of accidents becomes three times higher.

Be careful about those distractions. Stay under the speed limit, buckle up every time you get into a car. Be smart. Be safe.

A F
EIWEL AND
F
RIENDS
B
OOK

An Imprint of Macmillan

BEFORE YOU GO.
Copyright © 2012 by James Preller. All rights reserved. For information, address Feiwel and Friends, 175 Fifth Avenue, New York, N.Y. 10010.

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data Available

ISBN: 978-0-312-56107-9

Feiwel and Friends logo designed by Filomena Tuosto

eISBN 9781429955300

First Edition: 2012

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