Beginning with Forever (39 page)

Jean-Pierre
comes over to me as soon as Carson disappears into the elevator. His eyes are light golden brown, very unusual, but utterly hypnotic. I can barely break my trance from them. He has shoulder-length dark dreadlocks and a shy, but congenial smile with perfect teeth. My first impression of someone usually begins with the type of smile they offer me. He seems honest and sincere to me. He’s originally from Haiti, studied abroad, and worked at several pharmacy labs until he accepted his calling here. His combined approach of holistic and Western medicine has made him extremely successful.

Jean-Pierre
politely asks for permission to feel my pulse and for a tiny lock of hair. I didn’t especially like the cryptic expression on his face, but agreed to his strange requests. Lucene brings a sharp pair of stainless steel scissor and a white cloth pouch. She hands them to Jean and quietly walks away. He lifts the top layer of my hair up and snips a small strand underneath it. My lock of hair is neatly placed inside the pouch and set aside. This entire ritual is weird to me. I’m having doubts about his methods, but continue to cooperate. I don’t want to disrespect him because Carson thinks very highly of him.

“When did you last menstruate
, Miss Ly?” he inquires me with suspicion in his tone.

“
About six weeks ago,” I answer him, curiously wondering why this is his first diagnostic question.

“Does Mr. Bradley know?”
His golden brown eyes narrow, steadily searching for an answer to his ambiguous question.

I pretend not to understand
it, playing the naïve card. “Know what?”

“You’re with child, Miss
Ly.” His words strike my reality so hard my body trembles. I pull my wrist from his grasp and fold my arms across my chest to comfort and steady myself.
You’re not going to cry
, I command myself.

“How
do you know, Jean?” I need concrete confirmation, not some voodoo hunch of his. I ask for his confirmation with a trembling voice.

“
I feel the baby’s pulse strongly beating along yours. Take a pregnancy test if you don’t believe me,” he confidently challenges me, still staring at me with his mesmerizing eyes. I immediately get up, drop my face in my hands and ball myself up. Thank goodness for the sheet over my legs or else I would expose my bare butt to everyone. Oh my god, what if he’s right? Why was I so careless and stupid? Jean offers a consoling pat on my back. “I’ll keep your secret for you if you don’t wish to tell Mr. Bradley now. Miss Ly, he’s a good man. He’ll do the right thing.” I’m comforted with his promise to keep my secret for now.

“Jean,
I’ll tell him eventually, I just need more time.” My voice is now trembling terribly and so is my body.

“Most women would be ecstatic if they became pregnant with Mr. Bradley’s baby, a life of
endless wealth and social status,” Jean tells me as he gauges my reaction to his statement.

I’m immediately offended by
his insinuation. “I’m not like most women. I want him, not his money. If I believe he doesn’t want this baby, I’ll take care of it on my own,” I huff.

He g
ives me a respectful look. “I believe you Miss Ly. As for the nausea and vomiting, I have a special tea blend of licorice root, mint and ginger that will eliminate your symptoms instantly. You’ll need to drink it before every meal until your first trimester symptoms subside. It’ll also help you gain some healthy weight for your baby.”

“Thank you, Jean.”
I place both my hands on my taut abdomen and quietly say “Baby” for the first time. The emotions flowing through me are mixed. I’m feeling both disappointed and unexpectedly happy at the same time. My goal of completing medical school will have to be delayed which is disheartening, but I’m going to have Carson’s baby. As much as I already care for him, I can’t imagine how much love I’ll have for our baby.

Not a minute too soon, Carson exit
s the elevator while Jean hands me a decorative box of custom blended tea. It’s dark and wooden with intricate hand carving designs and writings on the top and sides of it that are foreign to me. I kindly thank him again and disguise my brittle state with an invincible façade.

“How did everything go?
What did Jean say?” Carson asks while intently surveying my every move.

“Fine.
Jean told me this tea will make me feel all better,” I inform him with my eyes fixed on the box.

“
Great, dinner will be served in an hour. This will be the true test of Jean’s healing power.” He turns on his heels and gives Jean a respectful wink. “
Merci beaucoup
, my friend.”

Carson intertwine
s our fingers together and leads me into the elevator. I quickly evade his searching eyes because mine would surely forsake me at this weak moment. I desperately need to find Amelia, but without a phone and with Carson’s constant attention, it’s an impossible mission. He remains quiet until the elevator doors open.

“Is everything okay?”
he asks me. I try to race out, but he holds my wrist captive. I gently nod my head several times without looking back at him. He releases my wrist in defeat. I want to pretend that nothing is wrong, but how can I after hearing Jean’s confirmation of my pregnancy? This damn open room concept makes it impossible for me to have a private melt down. All I’m able to do is stare blankly out to the distant mountains on our balcony and avoid looking directly below. I inhale the fresh air around me to lessen the tension I’m feeling. Carson quietly strolls over behind me and stands astride after allowing me several minutes to myself. He places both his hands on top of mine which are tightly gripping the metal railing and rests his chin on top of my right shoulder. He mimics my blank stare out to the beautiful green blanket of trees and plants.

“
What’s wrong? What did Jean tell you about your condition?” he calmly asks me as his eyes remain fixed on the tree tops. “You can tell me anything, Lil.”

“
Jean thinks I’m fine. There’s nothing to talk about. I’ll get over it. I’m having a hard time with you leaving tomorrow,” I purposely stretch the truth.

“Lil, it’s only temporary till the end of this school year. We’ll be together ever
y day after that or sooner if you would just come with me tomorrow,” he comforts me with a sly plea.

“Nice try, Carson.
” I gently elbow his abdomen. “The humidity is getting to me. I need a shower to cool me down.” I attempt to divert our conversation because I don’t know how much longer I can hold up this fake front.

“I’ll join you
if you don’t mind.” He pries my fingers away from the railing and walks me over to the shower. He helps unzip the back of my dress and slides it off my shoulders and down my body. I step over it and slowly undress him like I’m opening a birthday present that I’ve already peeked into and happily know exactly what I’m getting.

Our bodies welcome the cool water
, balancing the humidity and heat around us. I run a cotton wash cloth along his flexed muscular back and each toned leg as he leans his forehead against the tile wall between his fisted hands. He returns my favor by indulging my body with the same wash cloth, lathering the luxurious suds all over. He turns me around to face him with my back pressed against the wall. Water continues to flow above us and over his back and broad shoulders. Our eyes blink against the cool droplets. Enclosing my waist with his left arm, he tilts my chin up to meet his searching eyes. How can I possibly avoid them now? “You’ve been dodging my eyes this entire trip. What are you hiding from me, Lil? It seems like something else is bothering you besides for me leaving you.” He moves in closer, making it impossible for me to elude his question. My body stiffens instantly with panic.  I quickly shake my head while camouflaging my emotions.

“Nope…there’s nothing to hide
from you.” I hold my breath and stare back into his narrowed green eyes.

“Good,
because I hate secrets, and I don’t want any between us, okay?” He stares into my eyes for confirmation. I nod my head. I’m not sure I’ll be able to keep my secret from him much longer. He’s too observant with me.

He steps out of the shower first to g
rab towels for himself and me. Cautiously, he helps me out and wraps the plush towel around my body. He tenderly pats me dry with a separate towel. I wonder if there’s any woman out there as lucky as I am to have such a doting and passionate lover. I secretly relish his tenderness as I deal with my internal struggle.

Dinner is
served on the terrace over candlelight. We’re embraced in the warmth and brilliant glow of a stunning sunset from our height. I drank my special tea when we got back to the room while I sat on the balcony. Jean’s holistic practice is impressively powerful. The pungent scent of Carson’s white fish doesn’t even bother me. I’m still careful to stick with a fresh salad of fruits, nuts and organic greens. The head chef created a unique mint-ginger dressing for me after hearing of my circumstance, and it’s delightful. Carson sips his white wine while I savor my fresh sugarcane juice. This moment couldn’t be more enchanting as we sit here under a cloak of luminous stars, gazing into each other’s eyes. I persuade myself to push my unsettling nerves aside, so I can appreciate our remaining time together.

A
dwindling star captures our peripheral view. “Make a wish,” I urge him. He closes his eyes for several seconds and then opens them to reveal his sultry dark dilated pupils. I also make a hopeful wish of my own, asking for a happy movie ending.

“What did you wish for?”
I eagerly ask.

“It won’t come true if I tell you
, and I want it to come true. Let’s just say it has something to do with you.” His sweet, dimpled smile warms my heart completely.

“It’s time for dessert
,” he smirks and gives me his very familiar
dessert
look. He stands up and reaches across the table for my hand to lead me into the bedroom. Before sitting down, I part the mosquito net. Carson leans into me, urging my body to fall back on to the platform bed. The netting around our bed is perfectly secured before he unveils my body for his pleasure. He starts between my bent knees and traces the tip of his hot tongue up my thighs.

“No pa
nties, I could get used to this,” he gasps with pleasure.

“Carson, I’m curious
, why no panties?” I interrupt his sexual train of thought, and like always, my timing is off.

Lifting
his head up slightly, he answers, “I just wanted to see if I could get you to agree with me on one thing. You’ve pretty much fought me on everything, but surprisingly agreed to go commando.” He chuckles before burying his head between my thighs.

“I’m
relieved that I passed your test,” I murmur softly, feeling his tongue entering the former forbidden tongue zone. He circles the tip of it around my swollen clit, causing my body to arch automatically. Soft pleasurable moans escape deep from within me. I find myself caressing my own breasts and begging him for more. Leaving my sweet spot aching, he continues his licking and kissing up to my abdomen. And there is where he deliberately stops and so does my heart. My body stiffens as he cautiously caresses my taut belly and places gentle kisses over it.

“Lil, have yo
u had your period this month?” he questions me offhandedly.

I’m caught off guard.
What do I say? “Why do you ask?”

“I don’t recall that you’ve had one since we’ve been together.”
He returns to kissing and caressing my abdomen.

Once again,
I panic and then lie, but not convincingly. “I had it several days ago during my late hospital rotation. My cycles are very short.” He looks up with a saddened expression. Did I possibly read his body language incorrectly? Is he hoping for a baby?

“G
ood, I’m happy to hear that,” he responds with relief in his tone. I’m confused. First, he seems distraught that I’m not pregnant, and now he’s relieved. How can I tell him the truth when I can’t filter his sentiment? He must be the most difficult person to read on this planet.

Our baby talk f
izzles our heated moment, especially mine. However, Carson has no problem reviving his erection after a few minutes. He continues to savor all of me like he can’t get his fill.

“Your breasts
look like they grown and feel much warmer.” This man is too observant and persistent for his own good.

“
It’s part of my post cycle,” I lie to him once more. If he keeps this up, asking me a hundred questions, he’s going to make me become a compulsive liar.

His lick
s against my tender nipples are excruciatingly sensitive, but pleasurable at the same time. My throaty moans free Carson’s inner beast which has probably been caged all day. He strips his clothes off, slips on a condom, and cautiously positions my body for his powerful penetration. He places two pillows underneath my bottom and hugs my legs tight against his hard chest. His penetration is initially uncomfortable until my insides wrap around his fullness. “Lil, you feel so good.” He takes me like it’s our very last night together. Each thrust is full of conviction and need. His breathing is heavy, panting and grunting from pleasure. My legs are dropped by either side of his waist. He presses his throbbing erection perfectly against my sweet spot. With each thrust, I’m closer to an explosive orgasm. I block everything out of my head, but the passion that Carson and I are sharing.