Behind the Mask (59 page)

Read Behind the Mask Online

Authors: Elizabeth D. Michaels

Tags: #Christian Books & Bibles, #Literature & Fiction, #Historical, #Religion & Spirituality, #Fiction, #Medieval, #Religious & Inspirational Fiction, #Christianity, #Christian Fiction, #Historical Romance, #Buchanan series, #the captain of her heart, #saga, #Anita Stansfield, #Horstberg series, #Romance, #Inspirational, #clean romance

She smiled and urged him to resume his kiss. Cameron drew her fully into his arms, grateful beyond words to be reunited with his sweet Abbi, and to know that the matters of greatest importance were in place. No matter what happened from here, he knew everything would be all right.

Long after they made love, Cameron held Abbi close, gazing toward the ceiling.

“What are you thinking?” Abbi asked.

“I thought you were asleep.” He pressed his lips into her hair.

“I don’t want to sleep. I want to savor every moment with you.”

“My thoughts exactly,” he murmured.

“What are you thinking?” she repeated.

“All this time,” he whispered. “A baby. Oh Abbi, I can’t believe it.”

“Why not?”

“I don’t know,” he said, looking into her eyes. “Perhaps because I wanted it so badly.” He touched her lips with his fingers and she kissed them in response. “You know, of course, that I had no children with Gwen. I had reason to believe the problem was not with me, but I could never be sure until . . . well, I’m just so happy, Abbi. No man wants to die and leave nothing of himself behind.”

Abbi looked mildly alarmed. “There will be no talk of death. We have our whole lives ahead of us.”

Cameron smiled, but Abbi saw his eyes become distant again, and his expression turned sad.

“What is it?” she asked.

“I fear I was thinking of . . .” He hesitated. “It doesn’t matter.”

“If you’re thinking about it, then it matters. Or is it something you can’t tell me now?”

“No, it’s not that,” he said. “I just . . . don’t want to talk about it.”

“It?”

“Her.”

“Her?”

“Gwen,” he clarified.

“And why not?”

“It was a different world with her, Abbi—and much of it was so crass. I hate the memories.”

“Tell them to me,” she kissed his eyelids, “and I’ll forget them for you.”

“But she’s gone now, and there’s only you.” He tightened his embrace.

“That’s why you should tell me. Tell me what makes you bitter. Go ahead,” she challenged, “tell me the worst thing about Gwendolyn.”

He hesitated and she nudged him. “She could be cruel in many ways, but I think the worst moment was when she accused me . . . in front of my family, of not being able to give her a child. It was so humiliating, especially considering . . . well, since my father had always stressed the importance of passing on the family traditions, from father to son, that only aggravated the situation between us—because I had no son.” He looked into Abbi’s eyes. “Perhaps that’s one of many reasons why your having a baby means so much to me.” He sighed before he continued. “Anyway, what little was left of the marriage at that point quickly came to an end. But I’m certain she’d started looking for other beds to sleep in long before then.”

“But still she had no child,” Abbi said with tender reassurance.

“No,” he replied, “which was the very reason I hoped that I
could
have children. But it means a great deal to have evidence.”

“Just as it meant a great deal to me to know that you married me last night, not knowing about the baby.”

Cameron looked into her eyes, struck deeply by the comparison.

“Now don’t you feel better?” Abbi smiled. “Whatever happened with Gwen is in the past. Now we can both forget it ever happened.”

“You’re priceless, Abbi girl. You always make everything right.”

“Now,” she said, “tell me the best thing you remember about Gwendolyn.”

“Why?” He seemed puzzled.

“You tell me first, and then I’ll tell you why.”

“Well,” he said thoughtfully, “she could be a lot of fun. We laughed . . . a lot. We practically grew up together. Our families had connections. And she could be very witty—when she wanted to be. Unfortunately, most of those good times were
before
the wedding. Perhaps we would have been better off remaining friends. But as you say, that’s all in the past.”

“There now,” Abbi said triumphantly. “That is how we’ll remember Gwendolyn. Your witty first wife. The rest doesn’t matter anymore.”

“Sometimes I feel guilty,” he muttered, feeling a need to unburden himself of old heartache.

“There’s no reason to. Even if you weren’t the perfect husband, she made the choice to dishonor your marriage, and it’s certainly not your fault that she was killed.”

“I believe that,” he said sadly.

“Then why do you feel guilty?”

“Perhaps guilt isn’t the right word. I don’t know how to explain it.” He looked searchingly into Abbi’s eyes and pushed his hair behind his ear. “Sometimes I can’t help wondering where you and I would be if she were still alive. I didn’t like her, Abbi, but she didn’t deserve to be killed.”

Cameron pulled Abbi closer, needing the reassurance of her presence. “I did a lot of thinking while I was alone, and I couldn’t help speculating on what would have happened if she’d not been killed, and one day . . . perhaps coming here to see Georg, I saw you and . . .” He looked soberly at Abbi. “Would I have lived out my life loving you from a distance and dreaming of what might have been? Or would I have dishonored us both . . . just to have you?”

“None of that matters now,” she whispered.

“I know,” he said softly, shifting in the bed to press his face to her shoulder. “I’m sorry.”

“Sorry? For what? For admitting that you’re human and you find it difficult to deal with some hardships in your life? I find it admirable,” she said, stroking his beard with her fingertips. “But you must put the past behind you, my love. You said yourself that it was destiny for us to come together. Fate works in strange ways, and it’s not for us to question what might have been. Now, we have only the future ahead of us.”

“Abbi,” he said, leaning up on one elbow, “there is something I need to talk to you about.”

“I’m listening,” she said, not liking the gravity of his tone.

“Georg and I have discussed this thoroughly, and . . . I don’t really like it, but I have to admit that it would answer every unsolved problem that we are up against. And it would also see that you were cared for in case something went wrong.”

“What do you mean by that?” Abbi asked, leaning against the headboard.

Cameron sat to face her. He hated this, but he had to force himself to get through it. “I mean that . . . we will do everything we can to see that this goes through as planned, but . . . if something unforeseen happens, I want to know that you’re cared for . . . and the child.” As Cameron said it he had to wonder if Georg had known of Abbi’s pregnancy. He’d proposed the plan speaking hypothetically of the possibility of a child. But if he’d been keeping close track of Abbi, surely he would have known, or at least suspected. Cameron wasn’t certain whether to feel comforted or furious over such aspects of Georg’s plan.

Abbi said nothing, but she didn’t like the way this was sounding. Cameron cleared his throat. He looked at her cautiously, then he glanced down at his hands. “I understand the captain has proposed marriage.”

Abbi made a noise of disbelief. “What has that got to do with . . . and where did you hear that anyway?” His eyes met hers. His expression was sheepish. “Georg is little better than an old gossip,” she said, knowing he was the only possible means through which Cameron could have known. “I fail to see how it has anything to do with this conversation. If—”

“Abbi, don’t you see? This is an answer to our prayers.”

Abbi retracted toward the headboard.
“Whose
prayers?”

“Everyone involved.”

“Just how many people know that Captain Dukerk proposed to me?”

“Nobody yet.”

“Nobody except you and Georg, and that’s two people too many.”

“Abbi, hear me out. Captain Dukerk and I have had our differences, but I know he’s a good man. I respect him. We need a public event . . . something with a great deal of people in attendance. Lance comes from a well-known, highly prestigious family. And his position has given him the association of many important people. The wedding would naturally be at the cathedral. Half the country would come out to see him married.”

“I hope you’re exaggerating.”

“Yes, of course, but . . . listen to me, Abbi. If you tell the captain you’ll marry him, then you can plan this wedding and carry it out. The captain will be distracted, which will make it easier to do what we need to do.”

“This is absurd!” Abbi got out of bed and put on a wrapper. “You’re telling me you want me to lie to Lance, lead him through some kind of . . . mock wedding and—”

“Only the preparations. I plan to be there for the ceremony, Abbi. In essence, it is our public wedding that you’re planning. But you can’t very well do that without a groom.”

“How can I be that unfair to Lance?” she asked, pacing the room. “He’s been nothing but a gentleman to me. He does not deserve to be misled and used.”

“I agree with you, Abbi. But when all is said and done, I really believe he will understand.”

Abbi shook her head. “I can’t believe you’re asking me to do this.”

“I can’t believe it myself,” he snarled. “This is Georg’s idea. I
hate
it.”

“Then why are you—”

“Because I can’t come up with a better one. As I said, it solves every problem. While we put the finishing touches on proving my innocence, you can keep your
fiancé
occupied and pull together this public event where I can declare what I know. If the wedding is planned for a week from Saturday, we could pull everything together like clockwork. I know it’s not long to plan a wedding, but if notice is posted in the usual manner, it can be done. I know it’s been done before.”

Abbi stared at Cameron hard, as if that might help her understand this plan that seemed so thoroughly preposterous. Then her mind went back to where this conversation had begun.
If something unforeseen happens, I want to know that you’re cared for . . . and the child
.

Abbi put a hand to her heart when it threatened to burst out of her chest. “Cameron!” she gasped. “What did you mean . . . if something unforeseen happens? What has that got to do with . . .” She couldn’t even say it.

Cameron drew a deep breath and forced himself to say it. “If the worst happens, Abbi, I know Lance Dukerk is a good man; one of the best I’ve ever known. He’ll take care of you. He’ll raise the child well. He will be a good husband and father.”

Abbi turned her back to him while anger, fear, and betrayal all battled for dominance in her mind. “How dare you even say something like that!”

“Because it has to be said!” he countered. “We will do everything in our power to get through this with no bloodshed. But there is a price on my head, Abbi. Any man walking the streets can be run down and killed at any moment. But the odds of
me
surviving the next two weeks are less than average. I have to accept that. And so do you. I’m doing my best to believe that God will get us through this together, but I have to know that everything in my life is in order. And that means, first and foremost, that you and this baby are taken care of. I swear to you if I am living, I will not allow this marriage to take place between you and Lance.”

Abbi forced back her emotions enough to find a steady voice, but she kept her back turned to him. She couldn’t disagree with what he’d said, but she didn’t have to condone it. She reminded herself that she had sworn to do anything in her power to help bring him to freedom, but she felt she had to make an important point. “I can’t lie to him, Cameron. I can’t lead him blindly into something so deceptive. If he did end up marrying me, he should know what he’s getting in the bargain.”

“I agree,” Cameron said, hating this more by the minute.

“So, how can I be honest about my feelings and my circumstances, without threatening your safety? He’s the Captain of the Guard, for the love of heaven.”

“You’re an intelligent woman, Abbi. You know enough of the situation to handle it appropriately. I certainly trust your judgment.”

Abbi sighed and sat down in the chair near the window. What could she possibly say? She rubbed a hand over her face as if it might clear her mind. She sighed again. “All right,” she said. “I’ll do the best I can.”

Cameron slumped in visible relief and blew out a long breath. “You are priceless, Abbi. I truly doubt that I deserve the trust you give me.”

“As long as I keep getting your love in return, I might actually survive this.” She pointed a finger at him. “But so help me, you’d better make it to that wedding. I don’t want to be Mrs. Dukerk. I don’t like the sound of it at all!”

Cameron looked away, visibly upset. She saw the muscles in his face tighten and knew this was at least as difficult for him as it was for her. A minute later he looked directly at her, “I’ll be there, Abbi. I swear it.”

“But you just told me that—”

“I know what I told you. I know we have to be realistic. But we also have to keep the vision clear. If I work toward the picture in my mind, and believe in it, then surely it’s more likely to come to pass.” He sighed and held out a hand for her. “Oh, Abbi,” he said as she moved into his arms, “I think of it night and day, imagining what it will be like to be openly married to you. To be who I really am—once again. I imagine publicly declaring that I’m alive, that I’m innocent. And you are at the center of it all, Abbi. Without you, the rest seems so . . . meaningless.”

“I love you, Cameron,” she said.

“You truly must,” he replied, nuzzling his face into her hair. Then they fell asleep together with Cameron’s hand resting against the baby.

Chapter Seventeen

DECEPTION

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