Authors: John Boyne
Ãmile ended up in another fight with Donal Higgins, whose father said that Stephen was a turncoat and a blaggard for falling in with a bunch of Sassenach ne'er-do-wells and if he was any sort of Irishman then he'd never fight for a country that had done all they could to keep the Irish in servitude for eight hundred years.
âYour dad's a traitor,' said Donal Higgins, keeping his left arm close to his waist and his fist clenched as his right jabbed out and made contact with Ãmile's chin.
âAnd your dad's a coward,' said Ãmile, punching low to Donal's waist with his right hand while his left gave him an almighty clatter around the head.
âYou'll take that back,' said Donal, kicking out.
âI'll do no such thing,' said Ãmile, launching himself forward and throwing himself on top of Donal, his whole body lashing out in the hope that he'd hit something important and the fight would come to an end as quickly as possible.
It took two teachers to separate them and they were both put in the bad books for fighting.
They all came out to see him off the morning that he left for the war and those who were old enough remembered the day, over twenty years before, when they'd done the same thing for his father. The arguments about the Irish taking part hadn't changed during that time but no one wanted to see any harm come to one of the town's favourite sons.
He woke early, just after five o'clock, ready to join a small group of young men who were taking a bus together to Rosslare and then a boat across to Plymouth and a train to the centre of England where they were to be taken to a camp to begin basic training. Lying in bed, his eyes on the ceiling, he wondered whether he would survive whatever was to follow and whether he would ever see West Cork again. Whether he would ever hold his wife in his arms or take a hurley out to the fields with his son as he'd done every Saturday morning for the last few years. And finally, the minutes passed and what choice did he have but to get out of bed, have a wash, dress in the uniform they'd given him and get himself ready to say his goodbyes.
They gathered on the street, his wife crying for fear of what might happen to him, his nine-year-old son standing in the corner of the doorway, trying his best to be a brave man even though every part of him knew that he might never see his father again.
âI'll write when I get there,' said Ãmile.
âMake sure you do,' she said.
âYou're the man of the house now,' he said, turning to the boy. âYou look after your mother while I'm gone, do you hear me, Stephen?'
âI will, Dad,' said Stephen, standing up tall, determined not to cry while the whole street was watching him.
âNow take this,' said Ãmile, reaching into his pocket and handing across his grandfather's watch, whose glass had been broken and mended half a dozen times over the years but still told the time without fail. âIt's a family heirloom. And you look after it for me until I get home, all right? Because I'm coming back here for that watch and for you.'
They drove across to Rosslare in silence for the most part. Donal Higgins told a few jokes and the others tried to join in but the truth was they were too afraid of what was to come to join in the laughter. Ãmile sat, staring out the window, thinking of his father and all that he'd suffered during the last war, the one they called
the Great War
. He'd put up those posters, he'd tried to recruit people to fight for what was right and the people of the town had turned on him, but he had fought on regardless and finally taken four of the lads from the town with him to the trenches where all but one of them had fallen, all but one of them had given their lives for peace, all but one of them were buried in a cemetery where their families could only visit once or twice in their lives, for wasn't the price of the boat across to the Continent only shocking?
Stephen hadn't been the one to come home. He'd died just short of a year after arriving in France. He'd written home every week while he was there and he'd kept his spirits up and stayed good-hearted and he'd been sure that whatever the differences were between England and Ireland, this war was something bigger than all of that and every good man needed to play his part for peace.
And now it was his son's turn.
Ãmile met his sergeant, he trained, he collapsed in exhaustion and then got up again. He felt his body grow thick with muscle, he thought he could give nothing more, he had no more to give, and then he gave some more. He collapsed under the pain of it, he fought out the other side of it. He realized that he was made of strong stuff, that he was his father's son. He reached the end, he passed out, he was applauded, he took another train to Southampton where he boarded a boat for France and the uncertainty that lay ahead.
He lay in his bunk the night before the first battle began and thought of that night when he was just a boy and a brick had come through the parlour window and life as he knew it began to change.
âWhat's your name?' asked the boy in the bed next to his.
âÃmile,' said Ãmile.
âYou're French?'
âMy mother is. My father was English. He died in the Great War.'
âAnd you?'
Ãmile hesitated. It still came down to this end, didn't it? Who you were, where you came from, how you defined yourself. The country you called home.
âI'm Irish,' he said, before rolling over and trying to find some sleep.
I never had a chance to observe Arthur in his public role until a few days before my mother's funeral. We grew up next door to each other, the closest of friends throughout our younger years, but drifted apart in adulthood for all the usual reasons. Almost a decade earlier, with my nascent and much-longed-for career already smothered in its cradle like a mewling infant, I decided to spend a summer travelling and somehow lost track of time, building a new life far away from anyone who knew me. Arthur, in fact, came to the airport to see me off and just as I was about to make my way through the security gates he asked whether I would mind if he called Becky, a girl I had briefly been dating earlier that year, and invited her out for a drink. âShe has amazing tits,' he told me, which was true, although I had got no closer to seeing them in their exposed state than he had for she subscribed to some outdated and frankly nonsensical ideas regarding maintaining her virginity until her wedding night.
âDo whatever you like,' I told him, thinking this was a disappointing way for him to say goodbye to his oldest friend. âI don't care.'
We seemed to lose track of each other after that and when I eventually dug out his email address and wrote to tell him that my mother had died, he wrote back almost immediately, offering condolences while inviting me to a reading he was giving at a city-centre bookshop the following day, to be followed, he said, by an evening of alcohol-fuelled reminiscing.
I had no great desire to see him in front of an audience but nevertheless I went along and was surprised to see that he'd become a little bit famous, or as famous as a novelist can get anyway, for a sizeable crowd had gathered to hear him tell us all how wonderful he was.
âBefore writing this novel,' he said, putting both hands to his face and dragging them slowly across the skin, as if his fingers might offer an early-evening exfoliant, âI had a serious case of what our German friends call â¦' He paused for a moment and looked around the room. âAre there any Germans here?' he asked, and if there were, no one spoke up. âGood,' he said. âI had a serious case of what our German friends call
kästellfrügenschänge
, which literally means the sensation a man feels when he is standing on a precipice, usually but not necessarily naked, preparing to jump to his death but being held back by a feeling that he might yet be of some use to the world.' He smiled gently and shook his head as if he could not quite believe that he had ever doubted his own genius. âBut when the words came?' He wagged his finger at us as if we were unruly children. âNo more
kästellfrügenschänge
.'
The audience, morons all, lapped it up. I could see two university-aged girls, pretty if you like that sort of thing, doing everything they could to make eye contact with him. And I'm sure the boy next to me emitted a faintly erotic sigh at my old friend's supposed bilingualism. For my part, I found it hard not to laugh out loud, for I had spent most of the last few years living in a town called Tittmoning on the German-Austrian border and had become fluent in the language. (I work on a large dairy farm where, in fact, I have my own brand of local celebrity as the
kuhliebhabermann
â which literally means a man who has a suspiciously close emotional relationship to cattle â a nickname I acquired for no other reason than the fact that I try to treat all my cows, especially the good-looking ones, with atypical kindness before sending them off to the slaughterhouse in Burghausen to be stunned by electrical currents and have their throats slit.) And I can promise you that
kästellfrügenschänge
is not a real word. It's just a jumble of sounds placed next to each other that have a faintly Germanic ring to them.
My sighing neighbour, trembling before greatness, raised his hand.
âA question,' said Arthur, pointing towards the boy, whose face immediately turned fire-engine red.
âPlease, sir,' he whispered, like an older, ganglier, gayer version of Oliver Twist. âPlease, sir, what advice would you give to young writers?'
Arthur tapped his upper lip with his index finger as he considered this. I rolled my eyes; this could hardly be the first time he'd been asked such an obvious question. Surely he had a stock answer tucked away somewhere.
âHave you ever visited the southern of the two Brelitzen Islands?' he said finally, after much thought.
âNo,' said the boy, shaking his head.
âThe northern one perhaps?'
âNo.'
âWhat about the Cassandra Strait, that spiteful stimulant of cerulean that separates the two?'
âI've never been anywhere,' said the boy, becoming noticeably aroused now by such close attention. âExcept to EuroDisney once with my uncle Mark when I was twelve.'
âThe Brelitzen Islands,' said Arthur, smiling. âGo to the Brelitzen Islands. You'll know why when you get there.'
I felt myself beginning to grow angry. I'm not an expert on world geography by any means but I had never heard of the Brelitzen Islands and doubted their existence. Still, I said nothing. God forbid that I should piss all over the magic.
âCreating art,' declared Arthur a moment later, apropos of nothing, while holding his wretched novel in the air, âreminds me of why I look forward to death so much. At the heart of our mortality lies what the ShÄ«n-du monks on Mount Hejiji call
shrÄn-kao
.' He shook his head. âNo,' he said, âI'm pronouncing that wrong, amn't I? It's
shrÄn-kaoj
, I think. With a silent “j” at the end?'
He looked around but no one said anything. They were staring at him like he was the love child of the Dalai Lama and Oprah Winfrey. An old lady, close to tears at such life-changing wisdom, blew her nose loudly, sounding like a steam engine about to depart a platform in
The Railway Children
.
âYes, I think that's it.
ShrÄn-kaoj
. Forgive me, Gampopo!'
Both pronunciations had sounded exactly the same to me and they were, I'm sure, equally meaningless. I also doubted the existence of Shīn-du monks or of Mount Hejiji itself, which, for what it's worth, he pronounced
He-ki-ki
.
âBut life,' he added, banging his index finger sharply against the dust jacket, which showed a young boy walking with his back to the reader along a road towards a moonlit horizon. âLife is art and art is pain and pain is what makes us know that we are alive.' He held the book aloft now and waved it at us with all the zeal of John Knox brandishing the Book of Common Prayer in the face of Mary, Queen of Scots. âAnd I am alive,' he roared then, a blue vein beginning to assert its presence on his forehead. âI'm alive!'
Really, considering that we were only meeting again because I was preparing to bury my mother, I thought the whole performance was a little over the top.
Later, in the pub, Arthur told me that he didn't want to know anything about what had happened to me during my years abroad. He asked me not to speak about the friends I had made, the experiences that had changed me or any love affairs that I might have enjoyed. He didn't even want to hear about my cows and I have many interesting stories to tell about them if people are only prepared to listen.
âAs an artist,' he explained, âas a creative person, I prefer to rely on my imagination. I have memories of the boy you once were, Mulligan, and ideas about the man you might have become. Let's not spoil the narrative by drizzling reality over it.'
âWhy do you keep calling me by my surname?' I asked. âWhy don't you call me Pierce?'
âI've always hated that name,' said Arthur. âEven when we were children, foraging for adventure like truffling pigs in the woods, comparing penis sizes in darkened gladesâ'
âThat never happened,' I said.
âEven then I didn't like the name Pierce,' he continued, ignoring me. âThere's something so unbearably common about it. No, I think Mulligan is a far better name. You don't meet many Mulligans any more.'
âWell, I don't want you calling me that,' I said.
âFine, then I shall call you Darling.'
âNo, that won't work either.'
âIt's either Mulligan or Darling, darling. You decide. Now would you mind if I swapped seats with you? I prefer to keep my back to the room.'
âWhy?' I asked, standing up and moving around to his side of the table.
âThe punters, darling,' he said. âEveryone is trying not to look at me but in doing so they're making me feel very self-conscious. If I have my back to them, perhaps they'll stop not-staring.'