Beneath the Moon and the Stars (23 page)

Now was his chance.

‘I might just pop to the loo, while I’m here,’ Finn said. Joy was too euphoric to notice, though Annabel gave him a look.

‘If you see Craig tell him, I’ll be back with him in…’ She looked at her watch. ‘One minute.’

He smiled. That was clear code for, ‘don’t do anything stupid but you have one minute to say what you need to say.’

He strode in as Annabel distracted Joy outside and as soon as Craig saw him he scrabbled to get out of his seat, but Finn towered over him before he could even stand up. Craig cowered back into his chair.

‘I just want to make it very clear, if I ever see you anywhere near my fiancée again I will break every single bone in your fucking body. I would rather go to prison for the rest of my life for murder than have you touch her or any other woman again.’

‘Are you guys done here?’ Annabel asked sweetly.

‘Yes. I just wanted to explain something to Craig, but he understands don’t you?’

Craig nodded again.

Finn nodded his thanks to Annabel and walked out, snagging Joy’s hand and walking with her back to the train station.

‘I feel great, like this weight has been lifted off me. Did you see him, he was nothing. You on the other hand, with your stupid grumpy face and your split personality, you are simply marvellous.’ Laughing, she suddenly swung her arms round his neck and kissed him. There wasn’t a single bone in his body that was going to stop it. He wrapped his arms round her tight and right there in the middle of the street, as shoppers and parents with children and business men and women hurried round them, he kissed her back. She tasted sublime. He knew he could kiss her forever and never tire of it. As someone bumped into them, he shuffled her back into a side alley, not taking his lips from hers. Pinning her against the wall, he felt her pulse skitter with desire along her throat as his hands caressed against her skin. Her hands were in his hair and as he kissed her hard, a moan rumbled in her mouth.

He lifted her and she immediately wrapped her legs round his hips. He pressed into her and she tore her mouth from his, groaning as she arched against him. He moved his mouth to her throat and eyed the hustle and bustle that was going on mere metres away from them on the pavement. It was broad daylight but no one could see or care about what was happening in this darkened part of the alleyway.

Suddenly she stopped him. ‘Let’s go home.’

He nodded, keenly, not caring what boundaries had suddenly been crossed. He needed her right now and he could deal with his demons later.

Suddenly a thought struck him. ‘No, we can’t, I have Casey’s stag do tonight.’

She suddenly paled, her face stricken with guilt. ‘Oh god, I’m a terrible friend.’ She disentangled herself from his grasp and straightened her dress.

‘What’s wrong?’

‘Oh Finn, I’m no good for you. I’m such a horrible person.’

She walked out the alley and out into the bright sunshine. She waited for him and then they walked back to the train station in complete silence. What the hell had just happened?

*

Joy sat on the train next to Finn without saying a word. Tonight Casey was going to tell Finn that he loved him. She winced with guilt. Casey had asked her not to do anything with Finn until he’d told him how he felt. They had kissed in the garden, had a sort of date, danced and nearly had hot amazing sex in an alleyway in London. It wasn’t the romantic affair of the century but there still should have been some loyalty there. Damn it. She had done exactly what Zach had done with Pippa, she had taken what was rightfully Casey’s. He had asked her to wait a few days and she couldn’t even do that.

And poor Casey could not only be spectacularly rejected that night, but he could also lose his best friend at the same time. Finn could be really cruel about it. There was nothing she could do to take back what had happened between her and Finn but she had to do something to make sure that Finn treated Casey kindly. Though quite how she was going to do that without revealing Casey’s big secret was beyond her.

The train rattled to a stop at their station and they walked back to Finn’s truck. He started the engine and drove home. He looked so forlorn.

They pulled up outside his house and he got out, looking thoroughly confused.

‘Finn we need to talk.’

Chapter Thirteen

His face fell a bit. ‘I’m not sure I’m ready to have that conversation yet.’

She gestured to go into his house and she followed him into his front room. ‘Not about us.’

‘Oh. Well, I’m not being funny, but you sort of need to be quick. Casey’s coming round in a few minutes, we’re having a few drinks to commiserate his last night of freedom.’

‘It’s Casey I need to talk to you about…’ How could she say this without giving away what Casey wanted to say for himself? She took a deep breath. ‘Casey’s really special.’

Finn arched an eyebrow. ‘Yes he is. Don’t tell me you’ve fallen in love with him, it’s a bit bloody late for that.’

‘Just listen. He’s your best friend?’

‘Yes.’

‘You’ve been friends forever?’

‘Yes you know all this, why are you…’

‘Friends like him don’t come round very often. He’s sweet and lovely and generous and fiercely loyal to you. Just don’t throw that away.’

‘What are you– ’

‘I’m just saying, don’t throw away thirty years of friendship over male pride. He needs you now, god knows this marriage to Arielle is going to be a disaster and he’ll need a friend when it’s all over.’

‘And he’ll have one. Two by the looks of things.’

She opened her mouth to continue but he held up a hand to interrupt her. ‘Look I’m not sure what this is about, but Casey’s my best friend, I love him,’ he said simply.

This threw her. Maybe Casey would get his happy ending after all.

His eyes were soft and she was suddenly angry that she had doubted him.

‘You’d die for your friends wouldn’t you?’

‘I’d prefer not to, but yes.’

‘Then a kiss isn’t too much to ask for, is it?’

He frowned, slightly, still clearly confused. He moved his hands to her waist. ‘Is that what you want?’

She touched his cheek. ‘Yes, more than anything. But I wasn’t actually talking about me.’

This obviously confused him even more, but she was saved from any more awkward questions then by a knock on the door.

Finn continued to stare at her for a moment, then took her hand and started leading her back to the door. ‘Maybe we can chat more about this kiss another time, but you need to go, boys only tonight.’

‘Hey.’ Finn acknowledged Casey as he opened the door.

Joy saw Casey look down at her hand in Finn’s and with a huge pang of guilt she watched as he gave a small sigh of defeat.

‘Don’t worry, Joy was just going.’

Finn gave her hand a little squeeze and then walked back inside. Casey cocked his head at her as he followed him in.

‘Good luck,’ she whispered.

He gave a small smile and closed the door behind him.

She stood staring at the door for a moment, desperate to know what was going on inside. She hovered, biting her lip. Hoping that Finn or Casey weren’t near the front window, she got onto her hands and knees and crawled underneath it to the safety of the side of the house. Her heart was pounding as she edged along the wall towards the kitchen window, which was open a crack. She could hear voices as she approached, inching closer she strained her ears to hear.

‘Beer please,’ Casey said, from somewhere above her. ‘How’s things going with you and Joy?’

‘I… don’t even know how to answer that question. Good, bad, terrible and wonderful all at the same time. You know she’s not at all my type.’

Casey and Finn laughed, and Joy had to smile at the absurdity of it all. He’d said it so often he almost believed it himself. Almost.

Joy heard the noise of a beer bottle being opened.

‘What is your type?’ Casey asked

Ooh, good lead onto the gay topic.

‘No one. I’m not interested in any women at the moment, they’re a minefield. I prefer to keep my legs and my heart intact.’

Finn couldn’t have set up the topic of conversation for Casey more perfectly. And sure enough Casey took the bait.

‘What about men?’

His voice was faint though and there was no answer from Finn. In fact there was no noise at all. Chancing a look, she realised that the kitchen was now empty and they had evidently moved into the lounge. She hurried round the back of the house and then edged round the window, peering through the branches of a climbing rose to see what was going on in the lounge. They were sitting opposite each other Casey on the chair, Finn on the sofa. The windows were closed and she could only surmise what was being said.

Casey was talking – he looked nervous, embarrassed, but he didn’t take his eyes off Finn as he spoke. Finn’s eyebrows shot up, his mouth falling open slightly as Casey continued to speak. Finn started shaking his head, he looked really apologetic, though Casey looked sad – his shoulders slumped as he looked down at the floor. He stood up and moved to sit next to Finn and she found herself holding her breath hoping that Finn wouldn’t move away, or hurt him. He didn’t. Whatever Casey said next though must have been very shocking as Finn’s eyes nearly fell out of his head, but then he was nodding and Casey laughed.

She watched as Casey wiped his hands on his jeans and took Finn’s face in his hands. Finn watched him carefully and Joy moved closer to the window, her own mouth falling open in shock as Casey leaned forward and kissed Finn on the lips. Resting her face almost on the window she tried to get a better look. She wasn’t sure whether Finn was kissing Casey back, but he certainly wasn’t pulling away. The kiss continued, long seconds dragged on with her heart hammering in her mouth.

So that was it. Finn was confused about his feelings for her because he was gay or at least bisexual. Maybe he hadn’t known himself until now. Maybe he had been trying to deny it, but now Casey had come out to him, he clearly thought it was a good time to come out too.

She was jealous, insanely so, but at the same time she was so pleased for Casey, that he would get his happy ever after. Finn would be happy too, finally finding someone to love that he could trust. His best friend, it didn’t get any better than that.

With the kiss still continuing and with tears smarting her eyes, it was time to leave.

She turned away and walked into a clay pillar, the type that plant pots would sit on top of. It toppled and seemingly in slow motion, fell to the floor and smashed. The noise hung heavy in the air and she stared at the broken pieces for a few seconds before she turned and ran. She stepped straight into a plastic flower pot, her foot getting wedged between the sides and the bottom. She was still hobbling about trying to get it off seconds later when Finn opened the French doors and stared at her.

‘Enjoy the show did you?’

She couldn’t tell if he was angry or embarrassed.

‘I didn’t… I…’

There were no words to make the situation better and to her utmost annoyance, the tears that had threatened to come moments before now spilled over.

He stepped towards her. Finally freeing herself from the flowerpot, she turned to run, now more embarrassed than guilty for watching. He caught her arm before she managed to get one step away from him.

Just then Casey appeared in the doorway.

‘Ah leave the poor girl alone, she can come in and join us for a few beers.’

‘No, god no, I wouldn’t want to intrude.’

‘Finn, go and get her a beer. I insist you stay, it is my stag do, and you can’t say no to the groom the night before the wedding.’

Finn continued to stare at her for a moment, before he let go of her arm and moved off towards the kitchen.

Casey immediately stepped towards her and wiped the tears away from her eyes. He smiled at her. ‘He’s all yours Joy. I told him everything and as we both knew, he doesn’t see me like that.’

‘But… you kissed?’

‘I asked him if he would let me kiss him, to see if there was anything there, any spark at all.’

‘And he agreed?’ Joy couldn’t help but notice how high-pitched her voice had got.

‘He said it was only fair, if I’d been in love with him for fifteen years, then a kiss wasn’t too much to ask for.’

Joy smiled at the use of her own words. ‘And after? There was nothing?’

Casey shook his head. ‘No, not for him. Strangely, not for me either. For a few moments it was like “Yes! I’m finally kissing him,” but after that I was surprised by the complete lack of Zing in the kiss.’

‘Zing?’ She smirked.

‘You know, the vavavoom, the pizzazz, the… magic. It just wasn’t there. He did say I was a very good kisser though.’

She laughed, wiping away the last of her own tears.

‘So, you can have him, with my complete and utter blessing.’

‘I kissed him.’ She had to tell him. ‘He kissed me first, but I kissed him back. And today we kissed again. I’m so sorry.’

But Casey was smiling. ‘Was there Zing?’

She blushed. ‘There was definitely Zing.’

‘Good. Now come inside and get drunk, I insist.’

He took her hand, and ignoring her protests dragged her inside.

*

Joy lay on the floor, gripping onto the carpet for dear life – she knew that if she let go, she would slide straight out the lounge door and end up out on the street. The house had tilted and was lying on its side. The room had taken on a very steep incline. The windows were up somewhere where the ceiling had been and the door was down on the floor.

Urgh. She made a mental note never to try to keep up with Finn in a drinking competition. The man had nearly polished off a whole bottle of whisky and still seemed sober.

There had been shots, vodka, tequila, some other foul tasting stuff. They had drunk a lot of beer. There were drinking games, which she had lost at spectacularly, and they had played on the Wii. After a particularly savage go at horse racing, Joy had fallen against the chair as she tried to sit down and slumped to the floor where she had been ever since.

Casey was now sprawled out, seemingly unconscious on the sofa, and Finn was sitting on the chair above her head, his long legs stretched out over her back, his bare feet crossed at the ankles. He had very large feet.