Berlina's Quest (6 page)

After sitting around the cell for a few hours, the two girls were beginning to get bored. Felistia asked, “Do you have any sort of a summoning spell in your bag of tricks, Bee? Perhaps you could summon a guard or two from the High Palace to come and get us out.”

“That sounds like a good idea…but
if
they could get us out, I fear they would take us back to my mother rather than set us free. Or they might be ones who have gone over to Zatarra and Drailsen, and that would be worse.”

“Oh, right. I didn't think of that. Isn't there anyone there we could trust?”

“The one person there we know who is not on Zatarra's side…Lathan. He's not too smart…what am I saying. He's thick as a brick, but I could convince him to come here and not to take us back to my mother. Lathan is strong. With a mace, he could demolish that cell door. Maybe I'll give it a try.”

Berlina pulled out a wand and a few other items from her magic kit, and muttered a spell. There was slight pause before something invisible knocked her to the ground.

“What happened, Bee?” asked Felistia.

Berlina picked herself up and dusted herself off. Then, she said, “This castle is protected by spell-wards. Instead of warding against the passage of people and weapons, spell-wards deflect or reflect spells. They're intended to protect against wizards accompanying attackers, but they also keep spells from getting out, like the one I was using to summon help. My spell ricocheted from them. That's what knocked me down. As far as casting a summoning spell or anything like that goes, we're screwed.” She sat back down on her cot with a dejected expression on her face.

Felistia said, “You know, if I could get out of here, I could cover the distance back to the palace in my cat form more quickly than the horses that brought us here. Then I could recruit Lathan and bring him back here to free you.”

“We already talked about getting Lathan, but how would you get out? Even worse, if you did get back to the palace, you would have to find him and persuade him to come with you. I could talk him into it. Can you?”

“He knows I'm your companion and bodyguard, so telling him you're in danger should get him to come. As for helping us and not dragging us back to your mother, we'll worry about that after he's here. As to
how
I'm going to get out…” Felistia went over and leaned against the door grating. She melted down to the nearly liquid state she used for doing a complete change of shape and flowed through one of the bottom openings in the grate. Once completely on the other side, she reformed into her human shape. “What do you think?”

For once, Berlina was speechless. She just stared at her companion. Finally, she got her voice back and said, “Oh. My. Gosh. That was terrific. Okay, you're out. Go get Lathan.”

Felistia nodded, changed into her wildcat shape, and headed for the stairs out of the dungeon. Berlina bunched up the covers and the pillow on Felistia's cot and glamoured them to look like a sleeping girl. Then, since there was nothing else she could do, she sat down on her cot to wait.

* * * *

Days went by. Berlina knew that even if Felistia could get to the Palace quickly, it might take time for her to find and recruit Lathan. They might have to return at walking speed if Lathan couldn't get a horse. A distinct possibility, since the grooms were afraid to trust their mounts to Lathan's dubious care.

Berlina awoke from a nap by a loud noise down the corridor. She saw the figure of a white wildcat race down the corridor and past the cell door. Clamped in its mouth was a detached arm, still holding a sword. She quickly put on her pack and picked up Felistia's so she would be ready to leave. A few more hacked off arms and legs in gaoler's uniforms flew past the door. Then, she could see her presumed hero outside the cell door, swinging a huge mace to shatter the lock. Berlina jumped back as fragments of door rained down in the cell. Then, she ducked in earnest as the massive head of the mace broke off and sped across the room, crashing into the opposite wall.

Lathan entered the cell, still holding the broken haft of the mace. “Hey, yer Highness,” he said in his profound basso voice. “Watchoo doon here? You wanna get reskyooed?”

She rolled her eyes and said, “Yes, Lathan—my hero. I was just waiting here for you. Otherwise, I would have picked that lock with a pin and left hours ago, you big ape!”

Lathan looked confused, as he usually did. His face cleared slowly and he smiled. “Dat's nicea yoo ta wait fer me.” Before she could move, he grabbed her around the waist, picked her up under his left arm, and marched out of the cell with her. She ducked and barely managed to miss getting her head bashed against the doo frame.

“Wait!” she cried. “I have to find the sword.”

Lathan set her down on her feet. Berlina immediately took a pose with her hands on top of her head. Then, she spun around three times deasil. Moving her arms so her forearms were vertical and her hands pointed up, she spun three times widdershins. Then, arms pointed out level from her shoulders, she spun three more times deasil. “Ah, I have it located,” she said. “Let's go get it. It is not too far.”

Following Berlina's instructions, Lathan battled his way out of the dungeons while swinging his mighty sword. They went up many flights of stairs and into what turned out to be the marble-walled throne room. The white wildcat accompanied him, and Berlina followed the pair. There was a small pile of stuff near the foot of the empty, gold-inlaid throne. When Berlina went through it, she found her sword and the book she had just bought, but no gold.

“Damn, I almost forgot about the book. A mighty curse on the biblionappers.” She put the book in her bag, buckled on the sword, and said, “Let's go!”

Before the three could get moving, a door burst open, and a dozen guards in maroon and orange uniforms entered the room. Berlina and Lathan quickly drew their swords. However, it was obvious they were outnumbered and in trouble.

Berlina thought quickly. She pulled out her wand with her left hand and cast the first defensive spell she could think of—a confusion spell. In her mind, she could hear Forsythia saying, “This spell causes many random effects to your enemies. You never know for sure what will happen, but it will do
something
that will give you a fighting chance.”

Now, as Berlina watched, several of the guards managed to trip over their own feet and fall to the floor. Others suddenly seemed unable to decide if they should have their swords in their right or left hands. They kept shifting them back and forth instead of trying to fight with them.

Felistia went for those on the floor, jumping on the men, ripping out throats and clawing eyes. She disemboweled one guard with strokes of her hind feet. Berlina went for those most confused about their swords and striking at their arms. This ended their confusion because they no longer had either right or left hands to hold swords with. Lathan swung his mighty sword against those few who still seemed to be able to fight. He decapitated some and held off others until Berlina was free to get around behind them. From behind, she finished them off with quick sword thrusts to the kidneys.

It wasn't long before Berlina, Felistia back in her human form, and Lathan were the only ones still alive in the room. “Damn,” said Berlina, “that was nasty, but we got them. Now, for the second time, let's go.”

Before Berlina could protest her ability to walk unaided, Lathan picked her up again and stuffed her under his arm, as he had been carrying her earlier. They headed for the gates with Lathan swinging his sword at the occasional opponent they met. Alarms were ringing all over the palace. Finally, when they got out and reached the woods, their opponents gave up the chase. Now, not having to worry about fighting, Lathan ran quickly along the forest path.

Unfortunately, it was the wrong path. After a while, when they had not found Lathan's campsite, Berlina called a halt. “Something is wrong here. Lathan, where is your camp?”

Lathan looked around. “I dunno, yer Highness. All da woods look kinda da same.”

“Fee, how did you two get to the castle?”

“We set up a camp. Then, we walked straight along the path to the palace gate…” She paused and thought for a minute. “Does that castle have more than one gate?”

“Yes, yes. I'm fairly sure it does. It's been quite a while since I visited it, but I remember two, maybe even three gates. Why?”

“When we came to get you, it was more or less a straight corridor from the gate to the stairs down to the dungeon. After we got you out of the cell, we wandered around, all over, to find the throne room where your sword and such were. I suspect we exited via a different gate.”

“Damn. We'll have to go back until we're in sight of the castle, then circle around it until we find the proper gate.”

It was several hours before they located Lathan's campsite, a clearing next to a small brook. Berlina, sore all over from the warrior carrying her under his arm for so long a time, sank to the ground with a loud groan.
Why,
she thought,
do I have to put up with this bozo? Isn't there any better alternative?

Lathan fumbled around, chopping wood and lighting a fire to cook dinner. Berlina leaned back and closed her eyes to narrow slits, feigning sleep. Dinner would be a heck of a lot better if she cooked it, but she was too tired. Felistia shifted back to her human form, but she made no effort to assist Lathan, either.

When dinner was ready, her estimate proved correct. A single piece of meat ranged from charcoal at one end to not even warmed up at the other. There was some green stuff that looked like boiled ragweed. As for the mushrooms…the two girls decided not to touch those, sure they were at least mildly poisonous. Of course, Lathan shoveled it all down like he was dining at the Royal Court in the High Palace.

After they ate, Lathan gave Berlina and Felistia blankets, and they all settled down to sleep. Berlina made sure she and her companion were at least twenty feet away from Lathan. She did not want to give the big lug any ideas.

The next morning, Berlina awoke to find Lathan about to stew up another batch of ragweed and poisonous mushrooms. “No!” she said firmly. “Lathan, you go out and find some bargabird nests with freshly laid eggs. You can tell because fresh eggs are still white. Bring back a dozen eggs, and
don't
break them.”

“Okay, I kin do dat. Youse gonna fix us breakfst?”

“Yes, Lathan. I'm going to fix breakfast. Now go!” He stumbled off through the forest. As soon as he was well out of sight, the two girls washed up at the little brook, then gathered a few herbs and non-poisonous mushrooms. Bee got a fire going. She readied the crude utensils while the herbs and mushrooms cooked.

“Bee, I didn't know you could cook,” said Felistia. “An odd talent for a princess. When did you learn that?”

“I learned it from Forsythia. Did you ever think that there is little difference between cooking and potion making?”

When Lathan returned with the eggs, she cracked them into the mixture. With the pots and pans Lathan had, even head chef Emerald in the High Palace kitchen couldn't have managed an omelet, but scrambled eggs worked fine.

When they finished eating, Lathan said, “Okay, yer Highness. We gotta get moving. Gotta getchoo back ta yer mother.”

“No!” said Berlina. “That's where we were escaping from. I need to find and rescue my brother Darvid. My mother had us locked up for my safety, but we got out and were hiding in a tavern. I thought we were safe. We planned to move out soon and go hunting for Darvid, but Drailsen's men found us, grabbed us, and stuck us in the dungeon where you found us.”

“Wow, dat's some adventoor, already. So, if we don't go back to da High Palace, where do we go, yer Highness? An' how do we get dere?”

“A very good question,” replied Berlina. “I wish I knew. For the moment, I think our only choice is to start walking, heading east.”

“Bee, this is getting us nowhere fast. We've been walking for three days now. How far does this forest extend?” asked Felistia, looking at the trees and shrubs surrounding them.

“Damned if I know,” said the princess. “We haven't seen anyone since we got free from Drailsen's castle. Living on herbs, mushrooms, and bargabird eggs is getting old very fast. I'd like to get somewhere we can get some real food.”

“I certainly would, too. Luckily, I haven't had to do much shifting. Bargabird eggs and herbs are very slim fare. They might not be adequate if I had to shift a lot.”

Lathan spoke up. “Princess, I tink I see a farm ahead of us. Maybe dey got food an'l feed us.”

“Good idea,” said Berlina. “Maybe they have some horses, too. Fee, would you prefer to travel in your wildcat form or in human form on a horse?”

“I would rather remain in human form except when I need to change. Reports of a white wildcat might give someone a clue to your whereabouts. I think you would not want that to happen.”

“Yes, yes. You're right. That knocks the props from under another scheme—to obtain horses by demanding them
as the princess
. Don't want to be identified as the princess. No, no. I guess the only way to get horses, short of money we don't have, is through theft, extortion, or terror. We definitely are going to be the bad guys. I really hate to have to steal from the kingdom's subjects, but we have to rescue Darvid. What do you think, Fee?”

“I agree with you. We should think of it as taxing your subjects for the good of the kingdom, but how are we going to do it?”

“For the two of us, the barmaid garb will help. I need only glamour our faces. Come to think of it, that will work for Lathan, too. A palace guard uniform on one committing crimes will lead any victims to identify him as a renegade.” She waved her hands and glamoured all three faces. Then she said, “Let's go.”

The three marched out of the woods, across the farmyard, toward a ramshackled and unpainted barn, and approached the man standing there.

“Are you the owner of this farm?” asked Berlina.

“Yes, I am. What can I do for you?”

“You can give us three horses, you can. That will settle your annual dues to the East Jylyria Protective League.”

“East Jylyria Protective League? In the name of Ashmedai, what is that? Why should I give you horses, anyway? I have barely enough to run this farm and show a small profit. No, I don't think so.” He started to turn away.

Berlina grabbed his shoulder and spun him back to face her. “Protection,” she said. “Perhaps protection from having my warrior here chop off your head, and then where's your small profit?” She wrinkled her face into an evil grin, then continued, “Or, perhaps protection from having me cast a spell on your land so that nothing will grow here but ragweed and poison ivy. Then, where's your small profit?”

The farmer looked green at the thought of what they might do to him. “All right. Come in the barn. There you will find the only three horses not working out in the field today. You may have them, but there is very little tack for them.”

“Any horse is better than shank's mare,” said Berlina, but when she reached the barn and saw the three horses—over-aged swayback nags—she almost changed her mind.

The farmer put bridles—old, almost worn out bridles—on the three horses and led them out of the barn. He looked at Berlina and Felistia, and said, “How do you plan to ride them? I have no sidesaddles for women, nor even any regular saddles. Riding bareback in skirts—you will quickly find very uncomfortable.”

Berlina looked at the horses, then at the farmer. “Do you have farmhands?”

“Yes, I have eight of them, all out in the fields right now. Why?”

“Summon them to come here. Now. Quickly.”

The farmer looked at the determined expression on Berlina's face, then gave a piercing whistle. A young boy, perhaps twelve years old, came out of the farmhouse. “Joni,” said the farmer, “run around all the fields and tell the men to come here right now. Tell them to hurry. It's an emergency. Tell them they can leave their tools, because they will be going back out again in a short while.”

Even so, it was some time before all the hands arrived in the barnyard. While they waited, Felistia turned to Berlina and said, “He's got a point. Why don't we have more suitable clothes for this sort of activity?”

“I was working on getting some clothes and other gear while we were at the inn. Remember, when we escaped from the Faire, we couldn't take anything but what we were wearing. We got the barmaid's dresses while we were working. I had to be slow and careful procuring what else we needed, lest the queen find out where we were. Drailsen's men captured us before the other clothes arrived. So, we're stuck with what we've got…except I'm about to get us a bit more.”

When the farmhands all assembled, the farmer said, pointing at Berlina, “Men, you must do what this woman tells you.”

Berlina said to the men, “All of you, line up. Shortest on one end, and tallest on the other.”

The men stumbled around but finally got themselves arranged the way Berlina wanted. Berlina and Felistia walked up and down the row, paying special attention to the pants the men were wearing. Finally, the two girls turned to each other, and Berlina cast a silence spell, so they could talk without being heard by the farmer and his men.

“What do you think, Fee? The shortest ones?”

“Not the one on the end, even if he is the shortest. Did you see the shit on the seat of his pants?”

“You're right. I wouldn't want to wear those. However, the second and third from the short end look fairly clean. Will those do?”

“Yes, I think so.”

Berlina lifted the silence spell, pointed to the two men she and her companion had chosen, and said, “Take off your pants.”

The two looked at Berlina, and one of them said, “No. No.”

Berlina repeated, more forcefully, “Take off your pants.”

When the two still just stood there, the farmer said, “Do as she says. Otherwise, she may kill us all.”

The two men removed their pants. The girls blushed slightly at the revelation that among farmhands, male undergarments were conspicuous by their absence. Berlina took the pants and handed one to Felistia. The men stood there, hands at their groins, trying to hide the fact that undressing in front of two women caused them to exhibit the gallant reflex. Berlina ignored them and led Felistia into the barn.

When they emerged a few minutes later, they were wearing the pants, and had their skirts tucked up around their waists. “We should be able to ride bareback, now. Don't you agree?” Berlina asked the farmer. He just nodded.

The three mounted the horses, making sure that Lathan was on the largest and strongest one, and started to ride off. As they got to the edge of the farm, Berlina looked back. The farmer was trying to get his men—at least the six who still had pants—back out in the fields with little success. Berlina, Felistia, and Lathan proceeded eastward at a slow walk.

“Can't we get da horses to go, like, faster?”

“Not these horses,” said Berlina. “If we try to go much faster, we'll kill them. When we get to a town, I'll see if I can trade these three in for three better ones…with saddles.”

“Geese, how are yu gonna do dat, still wid no money?”

“Simple enough, Lathan. Just what we did here…we'll steal them. We'll steal three good horses. Only this time, we'll leave these nags in their places and call it a ‘trade'. With luck, we'll be out of town before our little peccadillo is discovered. That's why we need to eat first. Then, we'll do our horse trading.”

“Okay, youse is da boss, Princess.”

Berlina leaned over to Felistia and whispered, “Is it just me, or does this guy get a little exasperating at times?”

Felistia just laughed.

As they approached the town, one of the first buildings was a tavern with three horses tethered in front of it. “What luck,” said Berlina. “See those three? They are wearing decorative barding in the maroon and orange colors of Prince Drailsen. I can hardly think of any horses I'd rather steal.”

The three went over and tethered the nags to the rail, then went inside. Except for the bartender, the place was empty. Berlina went up to the bar and ordered three meals.

“Money?” asked the bartender.

Berlina exhibited a gold coin, and the bartender nodded. He scooped out three plates full of whatever it was he had in a large, cast iron pot, apparently some kind of stew, and took the plates to a table.

“This place seems kind of empty,” Berlina said to the bartender. “There are three horses outside. We expected to see their riders in here.”

“Oh, well. They are here but upstairs. They ate, and just a few minutes ago, they took all three of my barmaids upstairs for a tumble. As long as it isn't busy, I can get by without them for an hour or so. I expect those men will take their time with the girls.”

The three sat down and ate. When they finished, Berlina laid the gold coin on the table, and they got up and left.

When they were outside, Felistia asked, “Where did you get the gold, Bee? I thought we were broke.”

“Fairy gold, Fee. Fairy gold. I just hope he doesn't touch it to cold iron before we get out of here.” She turned to Lathan. “Can you remove the decorative barding from the troopers' horses and put it on our nags? Quickly?”

“I can do dat.” Lathan went to work and quickly accomplished the task.

“Good,” said Berlina. “That will make the glamouring easier.” She muttered a spell, and suddenly, the three nags looked just as the troopers' horses had before the barding was removed. “Mount up, and let's get out of here.”

She untethered one horse and mounted. Felistia and Lathan did likewise. They headed down the road through the middle of the town. They held the horses to a fast walk, so it would not look as though they were fleeing.

They were almost to the far edge of the town when they heard a shout behind them. The bartender from the tavern had run into the road and was yelling, “My gold. My gold.” Behind him, one of the prince's troopers had hobbled into the road half-naked with his pants around his ankles. Two upstairs windows flew open, and the other two troopers were looking out.

The one in the road talked briefly to the bartender, then suddenly realized his state of undress and pulled his pants up. He gestured to the ones upstairs, who abandoned their posts and rushed down into the road. They went to mount the horses they thought were theirs, but quickly realized something was amiss. They discovered the saddles were illusions, and that they were mounted bareback. Nevertheless, they attempted to give chase.

The nags moved forward at the best pace they could, but by now, Berlina and her companions had brought their horses to a full gallop and were outdistancing the troopers. One of the troopers attempted to spur his horse to a faster pace, when the horse suddenly collapsed and fell over dead, pinning the rider to the ground. The other two troopers came to a halt and went back to help their fallen companion. By the time they freed him, Berlina and the others had disappeared in the distance.

Now, the glamour faded from the dead horse. It was obviously an old farm nag wearing the decorative barding. The troopers looked at the other two horses and the glamour faded on them too. It revealed two more old nags instead of their fine mounts. They took the reins, and walking, led the two horses back to the tavern. “After all,” said one of them, “we paid for the girls. We may as well go back and get our money's worth. After that…well, we can figure out what to do.”

* * * *

A few miles out of town, Berlina and the others slowed their horses to a walk. “Don't want to overexert them. It's best to vary the pace every once in a while.”

“That's for sure,” said Felistia. “I think one of those idiots killed the nag he was riding by pushing it too hard. I'm pretty sure I saw it go down just before we got out of sight. The guy deserves a good whipping.”

“I don't know about that, but now, they have two horses for three of them. That may be enough punishment.”

They reached a small stream they easily forded. There was a path on the other side leading upstream along the banks. Berlina signaled that they should turn off the road. They followed the path until they reached a pleasant clearing surrounded by oak and elm trees. “We're out of sight of the road. I think this would be a good place to stop for a rest. I want a chance to check out the saddlebags on these horses and see if there's anything of value.”

“Uh, ya mean we gotta give it back, cause we ony wanted to steal the horses and not da other stuff?”

“No, Lathan. We stole it all, and we're going to keep it all,” said Berlina. “Those were Prince Drailsen's men. After the way the prince imprisoned us, he gets no favors from us.” She started rummaging around in the saddlebags of the horse she had been riding.