Beyond the Mistletoe: A Christmas Romance (Beyond Love Book 7) (14 page)

“I also make you afraid.”

“Which is why the rules are even more important. I could easily fall for you.” Who was I kidding? After knowing him for one week, I’d already tumbled down the slippery slope of lust and was heading face first to something else much more sinister.

“Why are you so afraid?” he asked, placing his hands on my hips.

A shiver ran down my spine as his eyes locked on mine. I’d planned on laying out a few ground rules and moving on. Now he was digging around in a past I wanted to stay buried.

“Betrayal.”

His brows furrowed.

“You said it yourself. Love is nothing but betrayal.”

“And you said it doesn’t have to be,” he countered.

My mouth turned dry, and I pushed down a lump. We were treading on ground I had no intention of unearthing this weekend.

“I watched
The Fighters
.”

“And what did you think of it?” he asked. I detected a hint of apprehension, which only made him even more endearing.

“I could probably recite most lines in the film.”

“You thought it was that cliché?”

I gasped completely horrified at the misunderstanding as I frantically shook my head.

“No. Not at all.” I brought my hand up to his chest and looked into his eyes. “I thought it was one of the most touching films I’ve ever seen. I can recite the lines because I watched it countless times in the last day or so.”

Relief flooded through Derek’s eyes, and my heart nearly sputtered to a stop. Not only was this man intoxicating in every sense of the word, he was humble enough to make his sexiness catapult through the roof.

“It reminded me how closely love and betrayal can be tied together. I tend to push the connection between the two out of my mind.”

He ran his fingers through his hair. “And that’s what makes you want the rules for the weekend?” He shook his head. “I never should have mentioned I was a screenwriter.”

I playfully shoved him and laughed, knowing I was about to confess far too much.

“I want the rules so I don’t slip up. I knew the moment I laid eyes on you last weekend that you were trouble.” I slid my finger along the waistband of his jeans, and my entire body felt like it was on fire. I pulled him over to the French doors to a velvet bench and took a seat, pulling him next to me. “Any man who can write something like that could steal my heart.”

“You don’t know that for certain.”

“Well, then, either way, I should protect myself.” I took my hand away from his waist and watched him carefully as he debated what to say.

After several seconds teetered on the brink of a minute, he let out a deep sigh.

“I have to respect that.” The look in his eyes intensified as his gaze dipped to my lips. “I don’t want to do anything to hurt you. That’s why I kept a distance last weekend.”

“Then what made you put up the Christmas lights?”

A wistful look danced across his eyes, and he reached for my hand.

“When I got home, I realized how foolish I’d been not to spend the night with you last weekend. Neither of us knows what tomorrow holds, and I shouldn’t have just cut it off because I might develop feelings for you. I wanted to give it a second try.”

I nodded. We were both running from something. I tried to tell myself I didn’t want to give someone the power to break my heart again. Whether that was truly the reason or not, I didn’t know. But what was his reason for wanting to stay a safe distance?

“Then what changed after the Christmas lights?”

“You don’t hold back, do you?” He shook his head and grinned.

“Not anymore.”

“When I came inside your house, I saw myself right at home. I pictured hanging out on the couch with my buggs and your chiwoodle while we watched movies. That was when I knew I needed to leave.”

“You’d regret spending the night with me?” My voice cracked unexpectedly.

“Not at all.” The intensity in his gaze deepened. “I’m worried I could regret not spending my life with you.”

“If we were to give it a chance,” I finished for him. “And neither of us are good candidates for that type of commitment,” I stated matter-of-factly.

“Doesn’t appear so,” he whispered, touching his forehead to mine. My lips had already parted in anticipation for a kiss—the kiss I wanted so badly to turn into something more—and my skin tingled from the slightest touch where he laid his hand on my knee.

But there was no kiss just silence sitting between us.

Certain he could see in my eyes the kiss I’d wanted so badly, a grin unfurled on his beautiful mouth.

“We’re in quite the predicament.”

“We are.” He rested his elbow on his leg. “I’m beginning to think we’re both gluttons for punishment.”

“Textbook cases,” I agreed. “My question is how did I let someone else screw me up so severely?”

“My question is how did I let myself get screwed so badly.” He sat back.

“Your view seems like the healthier question. You’re taking full accountability and willing to accept your dilemma.”

“On the contrary, I’m not willing to accept my dilemma.”

“But at least you’re not blaming someone else like I am.” I folded my arms as I thought about my admission.

“It doesn’t seem like blame. I’d guess there’s a cause-and-effect element there.”

“True,” I acknowledged, glancing around the room. The force behind  his gaze made my entire body overheat. I was completely captivated.

“I could tell you that I’m no good for you,” he said, bringing my attention back to him.

“And I could tell you the same.”

“Or we could let the ghosts of our past duke it out while we enjoy the moment.” Derek brought his hand up to my cheek and gently traced his thumb along my jawline.

“I like that option,” I whispered, feeling the control I had drift away.

Derek leaned forward, his lips colliding with mine, and I closed my eyes letting the electricity charge through my body. He took complete control, and I threw my unspoken rules out the window. Without a second thought, I tangled my fingers in his hair as our kisses deepened, hungrily searching for something neither of us understood. My failed romances flashed through my mind. I’d never felt this level of desire with any other man. Emotions never crashed through my body like this. Not even close.

What Derek conjured inside of me was unexplainable. It was completely irrational and unlike anything. Ever. My heart rate climbed as his hands skated along my bare skin just under my sweater. His breathing changed as he circled his arms around me and pulled me onto his lap.

Feeling freer than I ever had in my life, I placed my hands on his shoulders and broke free from his kiss as my hair draped between us. He opened his eyes and smiled as I sat on my knees, straddling him as our gazes locked. He tucked my hair behind my ear and shook his head.

“You’re so damn sexy,” he whispered. “So damn sexy.”

I smiled and pulled my sweater over my head, tossing it on the floor, as his hands greedily slid along my stomach. All of my worries slid away. No more overthinking Montana or his Hollywood conquests and betrayals.

“Had I known this is where I’d end up, I would have worn something sexier than a bra with pineapples on it,” I teased.

“It’s perfection,” he murmured.

I felt so powerful sitting on his lap, staring into his hooded eyes. It had been far too long since someone desired me, since I let someone desire me. Something was changing between us, and it had nothing to do with one-night stands or nonexistent futures together. We purely existed in this moment, holding onto what little we knew of one another’s pasts; the mess of our pasts unable to mingle complicated futures. His hand ran up my spine reminding me how much I missed a man’s touch, but not just any man’s.

I brought my mouth slowly to his, tasting the sweetness along his lips as his fingers slid along my bare skin. His touch did such amazing things to me as I pressed myself deeper into him, feeling the tease of his tongue against mine. Roaring emotions cut through the clutter of my mind. I no longer cared what happened in my past. His kisses cut through all that pain, replacing it with a desire for more.

Of everything.

His mouth traveled down my neck, and my head fell back exposing the most tender of places that his tongue hungrily found. I could barely stay upright as his mouth teased me endlessly.

A loud banging interrupted my moment of ecstasy, and I groaned, resting my head on his shoulder.

“That’s not really at my door, is it?” I whispered.

His arms were wrapped around me as he nodded. Our bodies were pressed so tightly against one another I could feel everything underneath me, and I didn’t want to leave.

I didn’t care if the building was on fire. I liked where I was sitting.

More pounding at the door.

“Do you think whoever it is knows I’m in here?”

“Judging by their persistence, I’d say yes.”

I propped myself up and looked into his eyes and groaned.

“I was really getting used to this.”

“You have no idea,” he growled.

I slid my hand down his stomach to his lap and rested there briefly.

“I think I have a pretty good idea and it seems your nickname from all those decades ago might be somewhat accurate.”

“Somewhat?” His brow arched.

“Remains to be seen.” I giggled as more pounding erupted.

“I can change that real quick,” he said, as I wiggled off his lap.

“Are you okay in there? I’ve been texting,” Gabby’s voice floated into the hotel room, and I couldn’t help but laugh.

I grabbed my sweater off the floor and slid it over my head on my way to answer the door.

“Just fine,” I said, swinging open the door to see a worried look plastered all over Gabby’s face.

“What happened to your hair? I was so worried about you. You always answer your texts and we’re supposed to—” She stopped mid-sentence as Derek walked up to us and wrapped his arm around me. “I mean, I thought. I don’t know what I thought. It can wait. Carry on.”

I chuckled and grabbed Gabby’s wrist to spin her back in place.

“It’s totally fine,” I promised. “What’s up?”

Gabby looked completely mortified and refused to make eye contact.

“There’s drinks and food in the lobby for everyone, but it can wait. You don’t have to—”

“Sounds wonderful.” I nodded and took a step into the hall.

“You might want to run a comb through your hair.” Gabby eyed Derek’s handiwork.

I slid my fingers into the tangled mess and laughed. “I didn’t know I’d gotten so windblown in the storm.”

“I’m sure the storm would be just as surprised about it as you.” Gabby winked and almost bounced down the hallway. She was apparently counting this as a win.

“I think your hair looks incredible like that,” he whispered, pulling me back into the room. “We’ll have to figure out how to recreate it later.”

“Indeed.” I began brushing my hair and noticed him watching me in the mirror. “You just don’t seem anything like who the tabloids made you out to be.”

“All those decades ago?” he teased, and I felt even more foolish for saying it. I was sure I wasn’t like my eighteen-year old self either.

“You were Hollywood’s bad boy, and now you’re hanging Christmas lights, straightening up some poor woman’s Christmas tree, and hauling out someone’s car from a ditch.”

“Your point?”

“That was my point.”

He laughed. “I’m a decent human being and that doesn’t sell stories, which is why you haven’t read anything about me for so long. And all three events you mentioned had to do with one person, you.”

He stumped me with that one.

“You’re not very good at keeping away. By the way, you didn’t mention you were in
The Fighters
.”

“How closely did you watch it? No one has ever caught that.” His eyes narrowed.

I shrugged. “I’m a painter. I pay close attention to detail, and some details are more fascinating than others. Speaking of catching little details…”

“Yeah?”

“Last weekend, what did you say to Eric at the bar? I noticed you gave him cash and said something to make the dancer blush.”

“I told you I placed a bet. I wagered that he’d win you over me, and I lost the bet.” His eyes glinted with satisfaction, but I knew there was far more to the story.

“Not so fast.” I held up my free hand as I colored my lips with gloss using the other.

“I lost fair and square. I thought you’d fall for Eric.”

“Are you saying I look like I should go for the straight-laced kind of guy?” I asked.

“Is that what you saw?” he asked. He looked extremely interested in this line of questioning.

“I did. He looked like a typical attorney. Too much like someone I knew before and definitely not my taste. So isn’t that what you saw when you looked at him?”

Derek shook his head. “That’s not what I saw that made me think you’d fall for him. No.”

“Then what was it?”

“I think I’m going to plead the fifth on that one, along with what my parting words were to him.”

I smacked him and laughed. “That’s so not fair.”

“I never said I played fair.” He swept a kiss on my cheek and took off toward his own room.