Bigger Than the Sky (Serenity Point) (4 page)

“You have a very nice ass,” I tell them sweetly because they are after all, carrying me and I doubt I could be doing such a fine job of it on my own, and I think the least I can do is be nice and show some gratitude for their effort. I then hear a gruff “harrumph” coming from the person, and at that I gather it’s got to be a man because it’s a manly sound and this
is
a rather manly ass.

As we continue on our way, my upper body bobbing against this man’s back, I relax and feel like I lose time again because when I “wake up” it now occurs to me through my drunken haze that maybe what’s happening isn’t such a good thing. I mean, this could be a serial killer who’s now got me. Holy shit!

“Uh… hey?” I say, but to no avail as he keeps walking with me and not answering. I speak again, this time trying to lighten the situation because maybe this serial killer has a sense of humor and he’ll like that about me and decide to let me live. “Um, you know, the whole caveman role-playing thing has always been a fantasy of mine. I mean, what woman wouldn’t love to be swept off her feet by a hot macho man, alpha male?” I wait for a response and when one doesn’t come, in the hopes of buttering this guy up and keeping him from murdering me, I tack on, “And one with a nice ass to boot!” Still no answer. In a last ditch effort at diversion, I petition, “But, I, uh, think it’d probably be best if we just, you know, go our separate ways because clearly we have a lack of communication going on here.”

“Shut up, Amelia.”

And I freeze.

Kade has me.

Holy fucking shit.

You know, I never thought I’d be weighing in on this option, but if right now I had to choose between Kade or a serial killer having me, well, Jack the Ripper, c’mon down! You have been chosen as the next contestant on the Slice is Right!

And my sense of humor astounds me.

Ugh.

Chapter 4

I next hear a key in a lock and a door open and close, but have no clue where I am. I’m taken up some stairs then tossed onto a bed where I bounce and let out an “Oomph!”

I try sitting up, but fall back to the bed as my head spins then feel the bed dip as Kade sits. He picks up one of my feet and tries taking off my shoe but I see he’s having a hard time of it as I watch him through half-slit eyes.

“Michael Kors,” I mumble in explanation and hear him mutter a “Huh?” so I keep going. “These are my Michael Kors super strappy sandals deluxe. I don’t know why I wore them when it’s so cold out, but they went with my jeans and shirt, so I had to match, right? And I love them ‘cause they’re just sexy and hot, don’t you think?” When he doesn’t answer, I close my eyes and clarify, “Zipper. Heel. Down. Off.”

And I’m out.

~~~

I wake to someone banging on the door of the shop downstairs and lie there hoping they’ll go away, but the banging just gets louder. Looking at the clock on my bedside table, I see it’s eight in the morning. Great.

I don’t usually get hangovers, so as I sit up I’m hoping my body keeps up with this awesome little asset, which it thankfully does, and I find I only have a touch of a headache, which means I’m dehydrated but I’ll live. Getting out of bed, I glance down and see I’m in my panties and bra. Huh. How the heck did I get home last night?

And then I remember.

Kade.

Holy crap!

He carried me home over his shoulder. And apparently he undressed me. Ack!

The banging on the door begins again so I grab my robe and pull it on, tying the belt as I go downstairs to see who the hell can’t wait until a decent hour to wake me.

“I’m coming!” I shout as I make my way to the door trying to smooth my hair a little because I’m sure it looks wonderful. When I come around the corner, I see Brody standing at the door smiling at me. “Hey, Brode,” I say when I open the door. “Is it the Apocalypse?”

He looks at me funny.

“Is Armageddon upon us?” I ask.

He chuckles and says, “No.”

“Is that Alcide guy from
True Blood
waiting outside to propose to me?”

He smirks and shakes his head.

“Then why the hell is it necessary to get me out of bed at eight on a Saturday morning?” I ask, hand on my hip.

He holds a cup of coffee out to me. “Thought you might need this,” he says as he puts it in my hand and walks inside.

“Oh. Thanks,” I say, sniffing as the smell of the divine drink drifts up to my nose.

“Heard you got a little trashed last night,” he says, a wicked gleam in his eyes.

“C’mon in,” I tell him frowning as I turn and walk toward the back. I stop at the little kitchen area to look for sugar. “Damn. Should’ve gotten sugar,” I mumble.

“Already in there,” he says. “One cream, two sugars. Just like you like it.”

“You’re my hero,” I say as I turn and give him a smile. “Let’s go up.”

He follows me upstairs and sits on the loveseat as I go to the sink to get myself a glass of water then another with an aspirin chaser. Next, I make a trip to the bathroom to check out the damage from last night and gasp when I see that it’s extensive. My brown hair with its blond highlights looks like overnight it’s channeled Helena Bonham Carter’s style (which always looks great on her but horrendous on me) and I grab my brush to try to tame it as my blue eyes stare back at me, rimmed in smudged mascara making me look like a panda bear. Lovely.

“You could’ve warned me that I looked like Madame Thénardier,” I say to Brody when I come out of the bathroom.

“Who?” he asks.

“
Les Misérables
?” I say as I grab my coffee off the kitchen counter then walk over and sit on the side of the bed.

“Lay who?” he questions.

I snort. “Never mind.” I take a drink and moan. “Carolina?” I ask. Man, his mom always made the best coffee ever.

“Yep. She sent it especially for you.”

“Didn’t think
you’d
remember how I took my coffee.” I raise an eyebrow and chuckle. “Tell her I said thank you.”

Carolina Kelly is one of the most wonderful people I’ve ever met. And I don’t know if I can face her just yet. I mean, I ran out on her son, which means I basically did the same to her and the rest of the family. God, who knew that with one act of panic and selfishness I’d have hurt so many people.

“So, you guys tore up the joint, huh? Cass said you rocked it on the dance floor.” He laughs when I duck my head, resting my forehead in my hand.

“My dancing probably looked better in my mind,” I say with a groan, raising my head and shaking my head at him.

“Heard you got a special escort home too.” He raises an eyebrow at me then grins when I shoot him a look.

“Forgot how news travels in a small town,” I say with a frown. “I don’t remember a whole lot after my third or fourth Maker’s Mark,” I confess.

“From what I was told, I guess you and Kade relived the good ol’ days in the sack.” He purses his lips and nods at the look of shock on my face as he delivers that awesome little morsel of data.

I gasp. “Wh-what?” Annnd the day just keeps getting better. He continues nodding giving me a
that’s what happens when you can’t hold your liquor
look. But then I narrow my eyes at him remembering he’s a perpetual smartass and I’m hoping he’s just trying to rile me. “You’re lying.”

He bursts out laughing and I throw a pillow at him. “Hey, now, watch the coffee!” he whines.

“I think I’d remember if Kade and I, well…” My face turns red because I don’t want to talk about this with him. “Besides, even drunk I wouldn’t do anything since he’s in love with someone else.”

“Who said he’s in love with her?”

“Well, they’re together, right? I mean, that’s usually what comes next when you date someone for a certain amount of time.”

“He hasn’t really
dated
anyone since he’s been back. Might’ve fucked a lot of ‘em, yeah, but gotten serious? No.”

Well, that’s something I didn’t need to hear. Ugh. And where are these feelings coming from? It’s got to be this town. Just being here’s making me remember the past, that’s all. If I were to leave today and go back to Richmond, I wouldn’t think about any of this again. At least I don’t think I would. It troubles me that I’m not sure.

“But he’s been with Peyton the longest. Before her, I hadn’t seen him stick with one woman for over a month.”

Great. So he might not be in love with her, but he likes fucking her. It’s making me angry just hearing about this even though I don’t have a right to be mad. But it’s something I’ve never really thought about before, Kade moving on, and hearing about it pisses me off. God, I’m such an idiot. What did I think would happen, he’d just stay celibate for the rest of his life pining away for me?

“So do you ever actually work as a fireman?” I say snottily to Brody because he’s being a jerk and agitating me and I need to change the frickin’ subject.

“Yep. One on, two off, usually, but I’m off for a week right now. Why?”

“Because it seems you’ve just had tons of time to be a pain in my ass,” I tell him, giving him a hateful look.

He barks out a laugh. “That’s what little brothers are for, you know.”

And he
has
been just like a little brother to me from day one. He’s two years younger and was in kindergarten when I moved here when Cassie and I became best friends. Over the years when I’d go to their house for sleepovers, Brody was always the one who bugged the crap out of us, and we’d finally end up tackling him or shoving him in a closet, making him cry so he’d leave us alone. Kade, on the other hand, was the broody, unattainable older brother who barely showed himself when I was there but when I did see him, I practically drooled all over myself.

“And you’ve got it down perfectly,” I say. He makes a goofy face and I laugh because I could never stay mad at him for too long.

We sit in comfortable silence, drinking our coffee when he asks, “So what
are
your intentions with my brother?”

I jerk my head back giving him a funny look. “What do you mean?”

“I mean, what’s going on with you two?”

I huff out what I hope is a nonchalant laugh, because I really don’t have a clue what’s going on with us either, but something inside me is definitely getting a good stirring up. “Nothing. Why?” He holds my eyes for a few seconds then looks away and scratches the scruff on his cheek, the concern clear on his face. “What’s going on, Brody?”

He looks at me again. “You really hurt him, Mill. I know he’s a big, tough, badass ex-SEAL, but when you left, it broke him… damn near killed him. He’ll never admit to it, but I saw what it did to him.”

I suck in a breath and avert my eyes from his, the guilt of what I did smacking me right in the gut. I rub my eyes with my thumb and finger then look up at him and say quietly, “I’m so selfish, Brody.”

He grimaces, clearly not wanting to have this conversation but I know he feels he has to protect his brother. “It
was
a pretty selfish thing to do, Mill.”

I look at the floor and nod in total agreement with him.

“I just don’t wanna see him get hurt again, is all,” he says. “And with you not planning to stay, well, I hope you keep your distance from him.”

I keep nodding and staring. He’s right. I need to stay away from Kade. And that’s been the plan anyway, but after seeing him yesterday and last night, I hate to admit it, but it awoke some long dormant feelings I’ve always had for him and it just felt… right.

I look up at him, tears stinging the backs of my eyes. “You’re right. I’ll stay away. And, yes, it was so very selfish what I did. I mean, who the hell do I think I am that I can just waltz back into town as if I didn’t wreak havoc the last time I was here?” I’m getting a little hysterical now but it’s only because I’m finally facing the consequences of what I did. “God! I’m such a bitch!”

Brody chuckles. “I wouldn’t go that far. I mean, I’ve seen you pretty bitchy before, but it’s not like you’re some cold, calculating person.”

“I’m really sorry, Brode. I truly am.”

He gets up from the loveseat and comes to sit beside me, putting an arm across my shoulders. “I know you are. It hurt all of us, Mill. You were family, and when you left, it felt like Fiona all over again, except worse because we knew you were still out there.”

My face blanches and I look up at him in horror. “Oh, my God. I didn’t even think of it like that. I’m a horrible person,” I say over the lump in my throat then I let out a strangled sob, ducking my head and closing my eyes not able to stop the tears that come. “I’m the worst person ever,” I say now, my body wracked with sobs.

“Hey, I didn’t mean to make you cry,” he says, grabbing me more tightly and pulling me into him as he kisses the side of my head. “You’re not a bad person, Mill. You panicked. We all understood.”

He holds me as I continue crying, my heart breaking over what I’ve done. Mostly I cry for hurting Kade, hurting them, and for being such a callous bitch about it. But I also cry because I’m so alone. There’s not another person in the whole world who I can call mine.

And I brought it all upon myself.

~~~

Before Brody leaves, he apologizes for upsetting me, but I tell him I
should
feel bad because of what I did, that for years I never thought of anyone else’s feelings but my own. He gives me a hug, kisses the top of my head then he’s gone.

After gathering myself a bit more, I shower and dress, then decide to walk to Shop and Bag to pick up a few staples. On the way, I pass by a small clothing consignment boutique that has the cutest Chanel purse in the window that I just have to go in and inquire about. Nothing like shopping to put you in a better mood.

“Hello! How can I help you?” a woman asks coming up from behind me.

“I love your Chanel in the window,” I say as I turn around and can’t help but jerk my head back when I get a load of her because she has long, bright pink hair and lips painted the same color. Wow.

“Oh, you’ve got great taste,” she says with a huge smile and I can’t help but smile with her. She’s really quite pretty, seeming to be around my age and what she’s wearing is kickass: a knee-length, black and purple bustier dress that has lots of ragged black tulle at the bottom underneath a short, black blazer, lacy fingerless black gloves, black tights with vertical stripes and black military boots. It should look costume-y, but it actually looks cool and she totally owns it. She reaches into the display and grabs the purse, handing it to me. “That’s pebbled leather and the C’s are overstitched on both sides. The retail is around twenty-five hundred, but it can be yours for a mere thousand,” she says nodding at it.