Authors: Violet Walker
R
ebecca has not been feeling well this past week. She is suffering from bouts of restlessness and nausea and so Lady Elizabeth called in a doctor to examine her. And the doctor has just given her the most wonderful piece of news: she is going to be a mother! Good Lord! Rebecca is ecstatic! When the doctor asks her about the last time she had her monthly cycles, she realizes that it had been back in Leicester.
“Congratulations, my dear. I am so happy,” Lady Elizabeth is grinning from ear to ear. “You have fulfilled my dream, Rebecca. I can’t believe it! I am going to be a grandmother soon.”
“And what a good day to receive this news too! Henry will be back anytime now. I am sure he’ll be over the moon when he hears this,” smiles Rebecca, unable to contain her excitement. She unconsciously moves her hand over her flat belly.
“I am sure he’ll be ecstatic. I am going downstairs now. I’ll send him up as soon as he arrives.”
*******************************************************
Henry is finally home. The discussion that he’d been dreading these past days will take place now. He will have to tell Rebecca to keep her emotions in check or be prepared for heartbreak. He has to be strong; if not for himself, then for Rebecca’s sake.
When he enters the mansion, he can’t help but notice that everyone is in a merry mood. Even the usually poker-faced Robert is looking a bit too pleased. Wondering what is going on, he moves toward his study to put away some papers when he finds his mother moving towards him with a glass in her hand and a gait that is too fast for her age.
“Henry, my dear! I am so glad that you are home!” Lady Elizabeth actually gives him a peck on his cheek! Henry is very intrigued to learn exactly what is going on!
“I am very well, thank you, Mother. How are you?”
“As good as can be! How did your meeting go?”
“As I had expected. Mother, I am very tired so if you’ll excuse me, I’ll just take your leave and retire for the day.” Henry wants to freshen up a bit before having
the talk
with Rebecca. While a part of him longs to see her again, another part dreads her reaction to what he is about to tell her.
“Of course, my dear.” She seems a bit flustered. “Do you mind taking this to Rebecca’s chamber? She has not been feeling too well these past few days,” says Lady Elizabeth, handing him the huge glass that she’d been holding.
“Why? What happened?” Henry’s brows immediately furrow with worry.
“Nothing to be worry about! You just go and see for yourself,” she tells her son and gives him a mysterious smile.
Now Henry is more confused than ever! What is the matter with everyone? Holding the glass cautiously in his hands, he moves towards Rebecca’s room. It seems that the time has finally arrived to let her know the truth!
*********************************************************
“Come in,” says Rebecca as she hears a small rap on her door. When she sees Henry standing in the doorway, her heart literally leaps out of her chest.
“Oh! It is you, Henry! Please come in,” she says. It looks like he has not shaved for the past few days, which makes him even more handsome, if such a thing is possible! Henry enters the room and closes the door behind him. He hands her the glass of juice and asks her about her health. Rebecca can’t help but feel that there is something distant in his eyes…..a warning her that whatever he has to say is not pleasant.
“How are you feeling now? Mother just informed me that you’ve been in ill health.”
Rebecca had expected him to take her in his arms and kiss her senseless after being apart for four long days. She’d missed him terribly.
“I am feeling much better now that you’re here. How are you?” Rebecca sees him flinch a little at her words. A sudden dread grips her heart. Something is wrong, very wrong!
“I am fine. Rebecca, I need to talk to you for a moment, if you don’t mind?”
“Why yes, of course. Please have a seat.” She notices that he decides to sit as far away from her as possible. And here she was, dying to throw herself in his arms!
“I really don’t know how to put it. Rebecca, Just before I left four days ago, Mother came to me and she…she told me that she thinks you are in love with me.”
Henry watches as Rebecca’s eyes grow wide with surprise. “I don’t remember ever telling her that,” she says defensively. Before Henry can respond, she adds, “But Henry, even if what she said turns out to be true, is it a bad thing that I may have fallen in love with you?”
“Yes, it is,” he says almost immediately. Taking a deep breath, he adds, “Listen to me, Rebecca. I can give you everything that a wife expects from a husband except love! I cannot give you that.”
Rebecca feels the ground slipping beneath her feet. She can’t believe that Henry is telling her that he can’t love her.
“But why?” she whispers.
“Because I am incapable of loving anyone! Love ruins one’s life and I will not let some foolish emotion override my better sense.”
“That is ridiculous. Your parents were in love with each other, Henry, and they shared a wonderful life together. If love is such a bad thing, why didn’t it ruin
them
?” questions Rebecca.
“I cannot argue with you. I just wanted to make my stance clear. You knew from the very beginning that ours would be a marriage of convenience. Why complicate it with all this love nonsense? Rebecca, trust me, I want to spare you the heartache-”
“Leave. JUST LEAVE,” she shouts. She can’t bear to hear any more.
Henry is a little taken aback by her sudden outburst but he exits her room, nevertheless. Before leaving, he tells her that she’ll thank him one day for warning her against love. What a foolish man, thinks Rebecca.
H
enry feels like a sick bastard for hurting Rebecca. She’d been so happy to see him! Truth be told, he had been eager to see her. Although he tried his best not to get too close to her, she had somehow managed to get under his skin.
He recalls the look of shock on her pretty face when he’d told her that he would never be able to love her. Good Heavens! When had the situation become so complicated? Just as he finally is able to close his eyes after a physically and mentally exhausting day, both he hears someone knock at his door.
“Who the devil is this, knocking at the door at such an ungodly hour?” he mutters. He opens the door to find none other than his mother standing there, looking mighty upset.
“Mother, you are still awake? Is everything alright?” A sudden tension grips his heart. “Is Rebecca alright?”
“How can she be alright when you’ve mercilessly crushed her heart beneath your feet?” she accuses him.
“Oh!” Henry heaves a sigh of relief. He’d been worried about her health since he’d seen her this evening. She looked so pale and weak. At first, he even contemplated putting off the discussion until she got better, but he decided that putting it off would only invite more trouble for both of them. “Thank God! I got worried for a moment that perhaps her condition has deteriorated.”
“What condition?” There is a confused look on Lady Elizabeth’s face.
“You only told me that she’s not been well. And she looked so pale this evening.”
“Did you bother to ask her why she looked so pale and unwell?”
“Well, I did ask her if she was feeling better…”
“Henry, Rebecca is carrying your child!”
Henry is stunned for a moment. Rebecca is carrying his child! Good Heavens! A bundle of emotions hit him all at once: joy, pride, excitement, wonder and relief! So, she’s not been well because…because she’s pregnant…with his child! Henry wants to shout at the top of his lungs. He is so happy!
“Oh Mother! This is wonderful news. I must go and see Rebecca at once-”
“You’ll do no such thing, Henry,” his mother warns him.
“Why? Aren’t you happy Mother? After all, this is what you wanted! And Rebecca…” This is when realization strikes him. Rebecca had been waiting to give him this good news and what had
he
done? He’d told her that…! Oh God!
“Why are you doing this to her, Henry?” his mother asks him calmly.
The happiness that had filled Henry’s heart recedes as reality strikes him. He swallows hard before replying, “I can’t love her, Mother. I won’t allow myself to fall in love ever again.” Henry’s voice is thick with emotion.
Lady Elizabeth’s heart aches for her son.
“It has been eight years, Henry! Whatever happened was not your fault….When will you understand that?”
“I don’t want to talk about the past, Mother,” he says stiffly.
“But
I
want to talk about it. I can’t just sit calmly seeing you ruining Rebecca’s life and your own too! Don’t you realize that you love Rebecca just as much as she loves you! I may be old, but I am not blind, Henry! The way you look at her, the way you care for her…this proves that you have feelings for her. How long will you deny the truth?”
“I don’t know what you are talking about,” says Henry, avoiding his mother’s eyes.
“You cannot lie to your mother, my dear,” says Lady Elizabeth softly. “Rebecca is nothing like Charlotte.”
Henry knows that his mother is right. Rebecca is nothing like any of the women he’d met in the past. She is honest and pure; her face like an open book, so easily readable. Does that mean she is incapable of breaking his heart? A voice within him tells him that Rebecca would never knowingly hurt him, but his brain doesn’t want him to take any chances. What if she turns out like Charlotte?
“How can you be so sure, Mother? Charlotte had also seemed very charming and innocent in the beginning,” he says bitterly.
“I agree that we underestimated that woman. But not all women are the same, Henry.”
“I agree that every woman is not the same. But a lot of them are! Most of them want nothing much from me except money and title.” Henry laughs a hollow laugh.
“It is all your fault, son. After Charlotte, you deliberately surrounded yourself with such women because that is what you wanted to see! And what do you think? Rebecca loves you because you are a Duke? Ask your heart, my dear, and you will get your answer. She wants nothing else from you apart from your love!”
A muffled sound makes them turn towards the door where they see Rebecca standing, looking a little stunned.
“I-I am sorry….I didn’t mean to overhear your conversation.”
“It is alright, Rebecca. I was just telling Henry that-”
“Mother, love can never be forced upon someone. If Henry does not love me, it is perfectly alright! I can’t force him to love me back just because I love him. I am sure he has his reasons,” Rebecca says, trying hard to control the tears threatening to fall any moment. She turns towards Henry and says, “Henry, I came here to tell you that I am carrying your child. As you reminded me earlier that ours is a marriage of convenience and you married me for an heir, well, once your heir is born, I shall no longer be able to live on the estate…” As she says these words, the entire room starts spinning in front of Rebecca’s eyes. The last thing that she sees is Henry rushing towards her and gathering her in his arms.
“
O
pen your eyes, sweetheart!”
Rebecca slowly opens her eyes to find herself lying on Henry’s bed. His worried face looks down at her and Lady Elizabeth stands by his side.
“Are you feeling alright?” says Henry’s concerned voice.
“Yes, thank you,” she says rather stiffly. Henry can sense that she is angry with him.
After fussing over her for about half an hour, Lady Elizabeth finally says, “Rebecca, ah…Henry wants to tell you something. I shall leave you both alone for the time being. Are you sure you are feeling better?”
“Yes, mother.”
“Henry, make sure not to stress her any further,” she orders her son and leaves the room.
As the door closes, Henry sits beside Rebecca and holds her frail hand. She resists a little initially, but then lets him hold it.
“Rebecca, I have to tell you something. Eight years ago, I fell madly in love with a girl named Charlotte. She was a commoner, a local trader’s daughter.” Rebecca is stunned at the revelation. She strains her head to look at Henry and finds a pained look on his face.
“I loved her more than anyone in the world, and she loved me too. At least that was what she always made me believe…One day I caught her in a …..let’s say a compromising situation with one of our estate’s kitchen staff!” Henry hears Rebecca gasp at his words. He looks down at her and smiles sadly. “I was completely shattered. I had gone against my parents’ wishes by falling in love with her and there she was, betraying my trust! I was completely shattered. I made a promise to myself that day that I’d never ever make the mistake of falling in love again.”
“Oh! I am so sorry…..I didn’t know…..” Henry puts a finger on her lips to silence her.
“But, my dear…here I am! In love with the most incredible woman I’ve ever known! The one who made me forget my promise and got under my skin before I had the chance to realize what was happening. The woman who makes me go crazy with desire every time she touches me, the woman whom I missed like crazy these past days…the woman who is bearing my child…..our child,” says Henry with moist eyes as he moves his hands over her belly reverently.
Rebecca’s eyes are overflowing with tears of joy. Her marriage of convenience has turned out to be the most wonderful thing to have ever happened to her!
THE END
Sally and Evan: Clean Slate
Book One
Rose Haven