Though I wasn’t sure why.
The couch bowed under me as I shifted. I kissed Jodie on the shoulder and sat up on my elbow. She’d been drowsing beside me. Which was good. “I’m going down to her now. Okay?”
“Okay.” She looked up at me, sleepiness in her gaze.
“I’m going to take all her meals to her for a few days at least. So until I say, you’re not to make contact with her, unless it’s an emergency. Clear?”
Those little front teeth of hers met on her lip.
“Worried?”
“A little. But you said you’d take care, so I won’t from now on.”
“Good.” I kissed her on the lips this time. “See you later.”
As I slid out from behind her, I was already thinking about what I was going to do downstairs. This appealed to me so much it almost disturbed me. The fires of sadism and dominance that I’d thought were mine to control were now blazing high.
I knew how I’d left her—in the hogtie straps with her hands attached to her ankles and to each other by straps and cuffs. “I’ll be back soon,” I’d told the girl. “You’ll be seeing only me. I’m banning Jodie from seeing you for a while until you and I have an understanding.”
Oh yes, I knew what that would do to her head. I knew that I scared her and that she’d come to think Jodie would protect her. Now she’d be down there, shivering, wondering what I intended to do to her. Fuck, I liked that.
One of the rules of BDSM said never ever leave someone alone in bondage. The chances were small that anything would happen to her like a panic attack or a snake arriving to bite her. Small, infinitesimal even perhaps, but not zero. I liked that too. I liked this departure from safe and sane and average.
I’d never suspected this could be a part of me, but I couldn’t deny it any longer. Illegal, unsafe, immoral, whatever the fuck it was, it was me.
As I went down the stairs, with my bare feet thumping on the timber, I already had an erection hard enough to make me want to jerk off.
I figured she’d be noticing that a lot in the next few days. I felt like footballer about to boot one between the posts, like an astronaut about to land on the moon, like a man with a woman in my basement who had no escape, no way to stop me doing whatever I wanted to.
With Jodie, I’d always,
always
, known I had limits, sensible ones. Even when I’d doubted myself, I think I’d known. The only time I really lost it was when I was overcome by a new situation, by the prospect of Kat putting that needle through her nipple and of seeing blood. Blood made me a bit nuts.
I stopped outside the locked door to the room and adjusted myself, gripped my cock through my pants for a minute.
Behave, you bastard
.
This time, it was so purposeful. I wasn’t overcome by anything, but I knew that although I would and could restrain myself, I would also go much further than my toy in there expected or wanted. And, no matter what she said or did, I wasn’t stopping. That was the difference. Big, huge, fucking difference.
My heart was racing.
“Zen, man. Zone in. Get your shit together.” I reassembled that iron control, unlocked the door, and stepped in.
There she was. Hogtied, on her side, on the mattress. Naked, of course. A woman who was all mine to play with. I’d discussed it with Jodie. That had been my last hurdle. Because she and I had limits. With Steph, the limits were mine to decide.
I walked to her and kneeled in front of her, placed my hand on her shoulder. Her bones underneath were so small compared to a man’s.
“Scared, Stephanie?”
After blinking slowly at me, she nodded the tiniest amount.
“Good.”
Then, despite her whimpers, I slowly ran my hands over every inch of her body—through her silky black hair, down her front to her breasts, around them, down over her belly, and between her legs, where I was amused to find her wet, but then women’s bodies often automatically responded to tactile stimulation that way, whether they wanted to or not.
“You’re mine now,” I told her matter-of-factly, as I appraised her legs and ankles. I rolled her onto her stomach and undid the hogtie clips. She was still bound but only wrist to wrist and ankle to ankle. I massaged from her thighs to her buttocks. I squeezed her ass and felt my way up her back, scraping my calloused hands against her tender skin and hearing her gasps. I caressed the indentation of her spine, marveling. Even women’s backs were amazing.
“I’m
not
yours.” Her answer was quiet and tremulous.
Such bravery in the face of overwhelming superiority.
I stopped with my palm pressing her upper back down onto the mattress. Enough pressure that she could feel my strength, enough so that she tensed then, since I didn’t relent, she gave in, her head lowering, her body quivering. Was she a true submissive? I was fairly certain she was.
“You’re pretty, beautiful even. Desirable. Fuckable. I scare you because I like pain more than you can comprehend. I’m not going to kill you. I’m not going to carve off your flesh and eat it. But, little toy, I am going to hurt you more than you think you can take.”
She froze in the middle of inhaling. I smiled and grasped a big handful of those dark locks just above her nape. I levered her head back until she was arched and her breasts were no longer concealed beneath her. So I took one in the grip of my other hand. “Mine,” I whispered. “You’re mine whether you fucking want to be or not.”
I squeezed both her breast and the fistful of hair, and I leaned down to look into her fear-darkened eyes.
“You need to learn not to be afraid of pain,” I murmured. “And you know why?”
She swallowed and I felt her endeavor to shake her head. Long strands of her hair fell across her face.
“If you lose that fear of pain, you will lose some of your fear of me. Not all, some. I’m not your nemesis, girl, I’m just going to be your master.”
Steph was a person, not a thing, and I’d not forget that. Yet, in an amused way, I regarded this as the inspection a horse buyer might make after a purchase, to not only recheck the mount but also to get the mount used to the new owner. Smell, touch, sight, and now, last of all, taste.
I released her breast, put one finger into her mouth, only to find her teeth together. “Open.”
When she didn’t move, I smiled. “Open, girl. Open or I start my experimenting early. You will not like that.”
She opened and I slid my forefinger in and played with her tongue, the edge of her teeth, the roof of her mouth.
“Taste that. It’s you, your cunt juices and the taste of my skin. From now on, whenever I say to, you open your mouth, you spread your legs, or you present your breasts to me by cupping them and holding them up. If you disobey, I will punish you. If you’re too slow, I will punish you. If there is a smidgeon of a possibility that you did something wrong, I will punish you.”
And that last, was so very wrong, but I loved the idea. Punishment that wasn’t quite earned? Bad. But it felt so good merely to threaten her with that.
Then I removed my finger from her mouth and I sucked the tip.
“That’s the first time I’ve tasted you, pretty thing. Now we’re even. And now…” I bent and picked her up, laying her over my shoulder and standing. “I will explain some more.” I hefted her into a better spot. “Everything else that I missed explaining. Which is a lot.” I moved over to the spanking bench and put her on it stomach down. Though her upper body lay on the padding, she was bent at the waist and her feet touched the floor. I unclipped her ankles from each other and used the bench straps to fasten her ankles to each leg of the bench—leaving her thighs spread apart just enough for access.
I eyed her. Access meaning I could see all of her sex—finger her, fuck her, whatever I wished.
I could. But I wasn’t doing this just for instant gratification. Delayed gratification then? I was going to fuck her eventually. I’d vowed to Jodie that she was the only woman for me, until she had fallen in love, or lust, with this one. That had made Steph a special exemption. And what an incredible exemption she was. Jodie had good taste.
“What are you doing?”
“At last, you speak? I’m making sure you can’t move too much.”
“Why.”
“You’ll see.”
I undid the wrist clips then went to draw her hands down to fasten them at the front. She yanked away from me then but I caught her wrists, held them at her back.
“Stop struggling.” When she kept it up, I transferred both wrists to my left hand and smacked her sharply twice on the ass, far harder than I’d done before. “Stop!”
She yelped but stopped and I couldn’t help smiling. “Thank you. Now you have a nice handprint coming up on your butt.” I had a thing about marks. I bent and kissed her there, right over the blush of the mark, breathed in, and bit her hard.
Steph squealed indignantly but I ignored it and managed to fasten first one wrist, and then the other, to the front legs of the bench. “Oh, I’m going to have fun with you, baby.” I stepped back and folded my arms, waiting for her to turn her head. Even now she managed to glare at me.
“Jodie would never agree to this!”
“
Tsk. Tsk.
She has. She knows me, and knows what I mean to do to you. This is how it is, toy. You may think this is some random punishment, but it’s not. You betrayed us, but in particular, you betrayed Jodie. Right now, you don’t deserve to be near her. And you won’t be, not until I think that you are worthy. Understand? I am the judge of your behavior. Answer me.”
She licked her lips. “Okay. I don’t have much choice.”
“No. You don’t. You really, really don’t.” I surveyed her body, strapped down, waiting for something to be done to it, and clenched my fists. “Except…”
How to say this? But I needed to. I needed to explain to her.
“When I’m done with you, we will let you go. Either we leave you behind and we leave Australia…” I could see her interest perk up. “Or we set you up in another country. I can pay you well, for the rest of your life, or mine anyway, but I have to be able to trust you, absolutely. Right now, I can’t.”
I took her chin in my hand and made certain she looked in my eyes. “Want to not to have to worry about earning a living, Steph?”
“I…guess?” She shut her eyes. “But this isn’t about that. If you hurt me, I won’t play along.”
“No? You think? If you want to be well off, you first have to pay a price. Let me see your darkest thoughts, your deepest desires. I want the very worst of you as well as the very best. Guess what, little fucktoy?” I swept aside the long drapes of her hair that covered her face and I kissed her hard on her mouth. “You have to prove it. You want it, you show you’re mine. And then, you show me you’re also Jodie’s.”
“You’re crazy,” she whispered. “That won’t convince me.”
“You haven’t figured this at all. It’s me that
you
need to convince.” I went to the toybox, unlocked it and pulled out something I hadn’t yet used. A sheath with a small blue-steel knife.
“What’s that? What are you doing? Do
not
come near me with that.”
“This is the start of your lesson about fear. A K has three strokes to it. I’m going to cut the backbone of it on your ass today. When I think you’re ready, I’m going to ask you if
you
will allow me to cut the next stroke, and then the next. You get Jodie back after the second is carved into you. Notice I said carved? I’m doing that to try to scare you more. Words are like that.”
“Fuck. It’s working then. Shut up with the carving!” She wrenched at the cuffs then said quietly but urgently. “Let me go!”
“I won’t do more than cut a short line, an inch or so long. Remember, it’s all in your mind.” And in my balls, which were aching at the prospect of doing this on her pretty little ass. What I said was true, and yet also, I craved this.
There was a strap that would sit just above her butt and hold her still even more. So I fastened that on too, cinched it in.
“Do you want me to just let you go in a few days, let the cops deal with you? If you say no to the next cut, that’s what will happen. You haven’t forgotten that you’d be up on charges have you? Sexual assault as well as charges to do with helping administer a drug to someone for the possible purpose of rape. Don’t shake your head, girl. That’s what the cops will argue. Accessory to manslaughter too, probably.
At that she stilled. “Noo,” she breathed, with a faint whine in her voice.
I bent and stared at her face. “Then be still. Understand your situation. You cannot go back to your old life. No one will see you as innocent because you’re not.”
She merely blinked, watery eyed.
“This will be quick. Show me you have strength. Be good for me. In a few days, a week, whatever, ask for the next stroke of the letter if I say you’re ready.” I straightened. “After this, Miss Fucktoy, I’m going to give you pain, and I’m going to make you come harder than you ever have before. I’m going to start you on a path that will let you swallow up pain when you have to.”
“Oh shit. No. No.” She shook her head vigorously. “No.”
“This though. No choice.” I unsheathed the knife. With my fingernail, I traced a small line at the side of her ass. “Here. This is where.” I held up the small knife for her to see. “It won’t go deep. Just enough to draw blood. Now, be silent. If you scream I will gag you. Understand?”
At that she again tried to writhe in the straps but eventually gave up and stared back at me, panting.
“That was an order,” I murmured. “Say you understood or I will punish you.”
After turning her head so she was face first in the padding, she replied, with a sob, “Yes, I understand.”
“Sir. You call me Sir from now on, and when you see her, you call Jodie, Ma’am.”
“You are a…” She sighed. But when my hand touched her skin, she shivered. “Yes, Sir.”
Triumph reared up, bright and burning. I poised the knife on her, above her ass cheek. “Now.”
I’d said it would be fast. I lied. I made it last, all ten or fifteen seconds of it. With the tip, I scored her skin to the length of an inch, over and over, and made it bleed. She screeched then keened a little. The tiny drops welled up like water from a slow spring. Fresh and red on her paleness. Truthfully, I’d exaggerated. This was a bit of a mindfuck. I’d scratched her repeatedly rather than truly cut.