He had to make a decision about Nathan soon. It hurt to leave him each night after visiting him. As he rocked him to sleep, he talked, and sometimes received a coo in response. Nathan seemed to hang on his every word. The boy stared up at him with the same eyes he looked at when he shaved in the mornings. Oh, God, he had to tell Birdie. It wasn’t right to keep her in the dark. She had a right to know before they married. If she left him, it would break his heart, but he couldn’t give up his son.
Stuffing the small box in his pocket, he turned and plowed into Detective Ethan and the young officer he’d seen with Ethan once before. “Oops! Sorry, I wasn’t looking where I was going.”
“No problem, Lockhart. Sorry we can’t take time to chat. Jenkins and I are investigating a case.”
Tad glanced at Jenkins. But for the mustache, the young man’s face was as pretty as a girl’s. He wore a long overcoat with his uniform. An odd character for sure, since it wasn’t cold enough today to warrant that. "Well, don’t let me keep you.”
“Be sure to see I get an invitation to the wedding.” Ethan waved as they strode off down the street.
“I’ll see to it.” Tad scratched his chin as he watched them enter Simmons Clothier for Men, a new fancy place for men to buy suits and whatnot. Not as tall as Ethan, Jenkins had a delicate build, almost fragile. Jenkins’s hips swayed just like— Tad gaped. Those hips swung like those of a particular woman he enjoyed watching. He snapped his mouth shut before he made a spectacle of himself and shook his head. No, it couldn’t be. Birdie was a little wild, but she wouldn’t dress up like a man and parade around town. Dadgummit! Yes, she would. But by golly, today would be the last time. He’d put a stop to her outrageous behavior.
He started for the clothiers, but pulled himself up short.
Calm down, Tad. You don’t want to barge in and make a scene.
Yes, he did but he wouldn’t. It wouldn’t do to jeopardize Ethan’s case—Ethan and Birdie’s case. Now he knew who Ethan’s investigator was. Birdie probably loved every minute of helping out. He should have known something was up with her getting home later in the evenings.
Tad ducked behind a storefront and waited. Thirty minutes later Ethan and Birdie left the shop, walked past him, and mounted their horses. Darned if Birdie wasn’t riding a different horse. Guess she didn’t want Molly or Strawberry to be seen around town with someone else on her. She and Ethan had planned this charade to a T and were thick as thieves.
He couldn’t believe Birdie would go behind his back and do something she knew he disapproved of. When they passed, he left his secluded spot and mounted Chester to follow them to the station. He hung back until they’d stabled their horses, then tied Chester up to one of the hitching posts.
Inside the building he marched to Ethan’s office, rapped on the door, and walked in without an invitation.
Ethan shoved back from his desk. “What do you think you’re doing barging in unin—” His eyes widened when he recognized Tad, but he kept a poker face. “As you can see, Jenkins and I are in the middle of an important consultation.” Jenkins didn’t turn around and acknowledge him but buried his head in a notebook. “Come back in an hour and I can see you then.”
“I want to see you now. And I’d like to get to know Jenkins a little better. He reminds me of someone, especially the way his hips sway, even under that heavy coat he wore today.”
“That’s insulting, Lockhart.” He rounded the desk and took Tad’s arm trying to usher him from the room.
Tad stood his ground. If it came to a shoving match, he was out to win. “How dare you expose Birdie to the criminal elements that frequent this place?” He yanked Birdie’s hat off. Her pinned up hair broke loose in places and tumbled to her shoulders. “Where are the clothes you wore into town this morning?”
She grabbed her hat from his hands and shoved the loose strands up under the felted brim. “You have no right to barge in here and question my actions.”
“I most certainly do. In less than a month we’ll be married. Can you imagine what the people in this town would have to say about you if they knew you were dressing up in men’s clothes and parading about town?”
She stuck her chin out. “I really don’t care.” He resisted the urge to shake some sense into her.
“Well, I do. Your behavior reflects on me and my mother.”
Her shoulders sagged. “It’s not like anyone could recognize me. I’ve been careful and am rarely out of Lloyd’s sight.”
He shot Detective Ethan a glare and spit out, “I just bet you’re not.”
“Now see here, Lockhart, our relationship has been strictly business. Birdie’s been a big help in collecting evidence and gathering information from the attacks on the Reservation ladies.”
Tad’s face heated and he could almost feel steam pouring from his ears. He ground out, “She’s been over on Two Street? Please! Tell me she hasn’t been mixing with the prostitutes.”
Birdie stood. She poked Tad in the chest with her index finger. “I’m not a child and you are not my husband yet. I’ll not have you or anyone else telling me what I can and cannot do.”
“What were you thinking, Ethan?”
His expression mulish, the detective muttered. “That she might could teach us something.”
“So, you’ve come to the conclusion she’s really from the future and was a Texas Ranger?”
“
Is
a Texas Ranger, Tad Lockhart.” Birdie strode to the door. “Excuse me, gentlemen. I’ll go change clothes while you discuss me like I’m not here.”
“Yes, I do believe she’s from the future,” Ethan said. “Don’t you?”
Tad released a pent up breath. “Yeah, I do, especially after the Massacre at Wounded Knee. She’d told us it would take place on December 29
th,
and it did.” He dropped into the chair Birdie had vacated. “It’s hard to believe, but with that little gun of hers, the massacre, and a few other things she’s told me, I’ve come to accept it.”
“I know one thing,” said Ethan. “She’s not like women of this era and though she’ll try, she’ll never fit into the mold of what we consider womanly behavior. If you try to keep her on a short leash, you’re going to lose her.”
Chapter Twenty
Birdie argued with Tad all the way home. He insisted she at least quit going to the Reservation.
“Why? No one knows who I am. I’m Jenkins, the skinny cop.” Well, that wasn’t exactly true. Lila and Rose knew who she was but they’d never tell.
“Don’t you realize how worried I’ll be for your safety, not to mention your reputation?”
She glanced his direction. “Why is my reputation so important?” He appeared as miserable as she felt.
“It’s important because I couldn’t stand to see you unhappy. You may think you don’t need other people, but we all do, including you. I couldn’t stand it if folks shunned you, and you’d feel terrible.”
“I don’t know if I can withstand the confines of nineteenth century society. I can’t play ball, I can’t ride with the Rangers, and you don’t want me working with the police department, doing what I’ve been trained and love to do.”
He yanked his hat off and ran his hands through his hair. “If anyone finds out, you’ll be ruined in this town. Remember, your actions have an effect on Mother also.” He slapped his hat against his leg and situated it back on his head. “I can handle the gossip, the whispers. Of course, I may have to beat the stuffing out of a man or two, but it’s the women who are most vindictive.”
Tad had that right. Women in the twenty-first century were the same way. Of course, society’s rules had changed, but if a group of women got it in for you, they’d make your life hell. That’s one reason she didn’t want to work in a largely female environment—too much sniping and other petty nonsense. Birdie didn’t want to bring gossip down on Olivia’s head or on Bethany’s, either. But, Olivia had mellowed somewhat since she learned the truth about Birdie—that she really had traveled back in time. Plus, Olivia was a pretty tough lady. Not many people would have the nerve to defy her and turn their nose up at Birdie. She sighed. Still, didn’t want to put the older woman—soon to be her mother-in-law—in a position where she had to defend her.
“Tad, I understand your concerns, but please, let me finish out this case. We’re so close to solving it, and I’ll give up my job until the department might need me again.”
He pulled Chester to a halt. “Your job? Do you mean to say you’re getting paid?”
Strawberry passed them by so she turned her and brought the mare up alongside the gelding. “Yes, I am and quite nicely I might add. More than you pay me to keep your books.”
She pulled Strawberry closer to Chester and reached for Tad’s hand. “I promise I’ll be careful and no one will recognize me.”
He brought her hand to his lips and kissed her knuckles. “Birdie, I believe it would kill me if that crazy man hurt you.”
The pained expression on his face weakened her resolve, but she couldn’t give in. He’d never said the words, “I love you,” but his actions betrayed his feelings. She hoped he’d say them one day soon. “I’m not going to get hurt.”
“How can you know that?”
She withdrew her hand, took a deep breath, and exhaled. What could she tell him? In her life this was her job and dangers were part of the territory. “Tad, this is what I’ve been trained to do. Give me a little credit for knowing how to take care of myself.”
He groaned. “Do you know how hard this is for me? I realize you’re from the future.” He shook his head. “I sure as heck don’t know how it happened, but I believe you were a Texas Ranger in your time and that you’re well trained, but you’re a woman. Putting yourself in danger and participating in police matters is just not done in this time. Consider how I feel.”
“Are you saying you’d be embarrassed or ashamed of me if someone found out?”
“No, never! But folks could make life mighty uncomfortable for you.” He cocked a brow and grinned. “In doing so, they’d make me mad as all-get-out. I’d sic Mama on the women, but I might end up busting a few noses of the men.”
“Tad Lockhart, you’ll do no such thing. Lloyd would end up having to put you in jail.”
“I have an evil temper sometimes, was known to be a scrapper when growing up. Just ask James.”
She cocked a brow at him. “Are you proud of your fighting?”
“No, but I guarantee, no one will hurt me or mine and not feel some pain in return.”
“Tad, believe in me. I can handle whatever they dish out. This case will be over soon. Afterwards, I’ll only help with evidence.” Lloyd needed her right now. They were so close to finding the man cutting up the women. She reached up and caressed his cheek. “Please be patient and give me to until this guy is locked up.”
He sighed and leaned over and kissed her. “All right, Birdie.”
“Thank you, Tad.”
She turned Strawberry around and they rode along in quiet for a while. The sun was setting behind them, casting their shadows on the dirt road before them. Fields of winter wheat grew on either side of the road. Cows or steers, whatever the difference, munched on grass. Life was so different and yet, she couldn’t say she didn’t like the differences. The air smelled cleaner, except for the odor of manure, even in town and life was slower, more laid back. It didn’t do much good to get in a hurry because the speed you got somewhere depended on how fast a horse you owned.
Just ahead the ranch, cast in a yellow glow, came into view. Birdie drew a deep breath, let it trickle out, then asked, “Tad, where have you been going the last few nights?” His head jerked toward her. His lips parted. His jaw tightened, but he said nothing.
“Surely,” she said, “you didn’t think your evening trips would go unnoticed, especially when you used to spend that time with me.”
“It’s… it’s something I need to deal with. I promise, though, I’ll tell you soon.” He didn’t appear defensive, which was a good sign, so she let the subject drop. For the moment.
* * *
Tad sat in the parlor of Mrs. Mayberry’s home. Sarah, whose child died shortly after birth, and Nathan had moved back in with her mother after he put Lucy in the hospital for better care. Hopefully, Dr. Franks could control her pain until she passed. The creak of the rocking chair sang a comforting tune as he gazed down at his son. His heart swelled with love and concern. He couldn’t give this baby up, yet he feared Birdie wouldn’t marry him when she found out. What woman would want to raise her husband’s child from an illicit relationship?
He couldn’t keep Nathan’s existence from her any longer. She had to be told, as did Mama and Bethany. A child needed his family. He prayed Birdie would understand and stick by him. Tonight. He’d tell her tonight. God, he loved her. Shocked at the revelation, because he’d never consciously admitted his feelings before, not even to himself, he lifted Nathan, one hand under his butt and the other around his head, he met the baby’s gaze. “I love you, little man, but I love Birdie too.”
The baby cooed at Tad and he gasped to keep his heart from bursting with joy. A woman to love, one who he was sure loved him, and this precious child, as well. How many gifts could a man like him deserve? Tears clouded his vision. He had to get a grip on his emotions. He couldn’t go around crying every time he thought of Birdie, or heard this little tadpole coo. A chuckle erupted from him. “You are my little tadpole,” he said, and Nathan’s eyes widened. Tad leaned down, kissed his forehead, and cradled him within the crook of his arm.
A knock sounded on the front door. Sarah walked past the doorway of the parlor on her way to answer it. “Hello. Can I help you?”
“Yes. Is Tad Lockhart here?”
Tad instantly recognized Birdie’s voice. She’d followed him. He froze for a moment, then relaxed. It was time. “Bring her in, Sarah.”
Birdie stood in the entryway to the parlor, eyes wide, staring at the baby in his arms.
“This,” he said, his voice husky as he rose to his feet, “is my son. Nathan.”
She moved closer and looked down at Nathan. A fleeting expression of longing crossed her face before she lifted shocked eyes to him. Her bottom lip trembled. She tried to still it by pinching her lips together, which made her effort to smile a grimace. Oh, God, he’d hurt her so much, and hated himself for it, but he couldn’t regret this child.