Bitter Sweet Love (4 page)

The male pride in his face was so evident when I opened my eyes that I wanted to pick up something heavy and smack him upside the head with it.

“Don’t even say it,” I warned, flushing.

“What?” An infuriating half grin appeared on his lips. “I wasn’t going to say a damn thing.”

Chapter Seven

The memory of his kiss lingered on my lips long after he was gone and well into the following day. I had no idea a kiss could hold that kind of power, and maybe that wasn’t common, but with Dez it remained at the edge of every thought, thoroughly distracting me.

I spent the better part of the morning pretending to learn the fine art of healing with stinky herbs before giving up. Since my homeschooling had finished, Claudia was now trying to impart what she’d believed was a more important education. Other girls my age were going off to college. I was learning the difference between witch hazel and lemon thyme.

Roaming aimlessly, I found myself outside of the room Dez was staying in—the same room on the third floor he’d been in before he left. He was still resting, and I knew that I shouldn’t go in, but a familiar restlessness had invaded me and when this happened, I was prone to doing inappropriate and even stupid things.

Wiping my palms against my jeans, I tried his door. It was unlocked. I took a deep breath and eased it open. Heavy curtains drawn over the windows cast his room in darkness, but my eyes adapted quickly. My gaze fell to the large bed first, but it was empty. I suspected as much.

I turned and saw him in the corner of the room.

We could rest two ways—in our human forms or entombed. Most of us slept like everyone else in the world, in a nice comfy bed, but those who hunted needed the deep healing sleep that only came from taking on the form that had inspired hundreds of thousands of statues.

Quietly, I approached him, drawn in a way that caused my skin to tingle. His wings were tucked close to his sides, their tips nearly brushing the floor. The horns on the graceful arches were large and thick, edges deadly sharp. His head was bowed and arms folded in, hands clasped over his pelvis.

In the darkness, the slate gray of his skin was dull, but in the light, I knew it would hold a soft sheen. His form was unmoving, not even his chest stirring beneath the stone. I didn’t like to sleep this way, and never having a real reason to do so, it wasn’t something I engaged in often. The sleep... it was too close to being dead.

I honestly didn’t know why I did what I did next. Biting down on my lip, I reached out and touched his arm. The shell was smooth and warm, completely unyielding. I moved my hand up his arm, following the hard swells of muscle. My hand drifted of its own accord, gliding to a stop on his chest. Under my palm, his heart beat―
thump
,
thump-thump
,
thump
.

Lifting my hand, I trailed my fingers down the curve of his jaw, touching him in a way I didn’t have the courage to do when he was awake. I sort of felt like a creeper, but I was too entranced by the feel of him to stop. My finger grazed over the bottom of his lip as I glanced up.

Two eyes the color of polished sapphires stared back into mine.

Oh. My. God.

His mouth opened and he bit down on the pad of my finger with just enough pressure to cause me to gasp. I was frozen and then I felt his tongue circle the tip of my finger.

I jerked back at the sudden flood of heat in my veins, curling my hand against my chest. “I was...” I really had no excuse for what I was doing.

Dez’s chuckle was deep and husky, and I shivered, backing up another step. He straightened and lifted his arms, wings unfurling as his back bowed. Stone and bone cracked. The outer shell glimmered red and then faded back into his skin as he shifted into his human form. Bare golden flesh rippled tautly as he lowered his arms. My gaze moved down.

He was naked and he was...

“Oh, my God!” I whipped around, squeezing my eyes shut. My entire face burned. How had I not noticed
that?

Dez’s laugh caused my body to burn bright. “Oh, come on, it’s not like you haven’t seen me naked before.”

“When you were, like, ten, and it was by accident!” I clapped my hands over my cheeks. “And you weren’t so...”

“So what?” His warm breath caressed the back of my neck.

“Nothing!” Wow, I’d never be able to get the image out of my head. Not sure I wanted to, but still...

“You can turn around now.” Amusement danced in his tone. “I have clothes on.”

I might have been a bit disappointed as I peeked at him. He’d pulled on a pair of sweats, but they hung so low I wondered how long they’d remain around his hips. He parted the room’s curtains and light seeped in, spreading over the floor.

“I’m sorry,” I said. “I didn’t mean to wake you.”

“Has something happened?” he asked, walking back toward me. He yawned when I shook my head. “So you just wanted to see me?”

I didn’t say anything.

He grinned. “And feel me up?”

I cringed. “You’re never going to let me live this down, are you?”

“Never.” He reached out and tugged on the edge of my ponytail. “Don’t worry. I enjoyed it.”

“Good to know,” I muttered.

“Let me shower and we’ll do the mall thing today. Okay?”

I folded my hands together to keep from clapping. “Try not to sound too excited about it.”

He laughed. “It’s a mall. Maybe if we were doing the skinny-dipping today, I’d be more excited. Correction. I’d be a lot more excited.”

I wanted to kick myself for suggesting that condition. “You know, I could probably think of something more important than that to do, like—”

“Oh, no, no take-backs.” He winked. “Can’t make any changes now. We’ve already started, and I know the perfect place for the skinny dipping. And honestly, I am counting down every second until then.”

My cheeks flushed. “I hate you.”

“No, you don’t.”

“Go shower.”

“I am.”

“Then go.”

“I’m trying to, but you keep talking to me and looking so damn adorable.”

“I’ll stop talking or looking cute,” I said, fighting a grin. “Go.”

He smiled widely. “I said adorable.”

“Go!” I laughed.

“Going. I promise. Right now.”

As he walked past me, he swooped in like a damn bird of prey. Dez kissed me before I realized what he was about to do. His lips were on mine, warm and firm. The kiss was brief, nothing like last night, and then he was going, walking into his bathroom, and I was standing there, feeling the touch of his lips for endless minutes.

My mind was in a thousand places while I packed a small suitcase for our trip, partly stuck on my mall condition, which we’d fulfilled yesterday. Dez and I had... we’d had a lot of fun. We hadn’t talked about the past and our conversations hadn’t been serious as I forced him from one store to the next. He’d displayed an inordinate amount of patience while I tried on clothes and sorted through a hundred scented candles, picking out the perfect one for Danika.

It had been hard not to look at him and blush after everything I had seen in his bedroom and it had been equally hard not tonotice how the human girls checked him out. He turned the heads of the young and old in every shop we went into.

And it had been damn near impossible not to want to tackle the chicks by the food court and rip their arms out.

We’d ended our trip at a tiny ice-cream parlor in town, and as we walked back to the car, Dez had completed
his
condition. When he kissed me, he had tasted like chocolate and man, a mind-numbingly intoxicating flavor.

He’d also stayed with me until he left to hunt with the rest of the clan, talking about nothing important while we pretended to watch a movie. No one bothered us even though I’d been in his room. I’d fallen asleep before it was time for him to leave and woke before he returned, scrambling back to my bedroom before I had done something stupid, like waited for him in
his
bed. It had been hard leaving. His scent had been everywhere.

And now I was preparing to leave my home for the first time in forever. I’d never been anywhere before, and I’d already packed and unpacked three times. Why did I think I needed two outfit choices for each day?

While we’d been at the mall the day before, Dez had announced that we’d be leaving the following afternoon and traveling by car. Excitement hummed in my veins at the prospect of all I would get to see.

Danika sat on my suitcase while I zipped it shut and then she bounced off. “I expect mementos. Something cheesy. Like an authentic I Love New York City T-shirt.”

“Okay.” I grinned as I pulled my suitcase off the bed. It thumped on the floor when I set it down. “What about from DC?”

“A naked picture of Zayne?” she asked.

I laughed, shaking my head. “And how do you expect me to pull that off?”

She shrugged. “He’s got to take a shower at some point, right?”

“I’m sure he does, but I have a tiny problem with Jasmine taking a picture of a guy naked.”

We both turned at the sound of Dez’s voice. He stood in the doorway, hair damp and an easy grin on his face. I flushed, but Danika looked unrepentant.

“But she’s doing it for me,” she reasoned. “It’s not like she’s going to be looking at his goods.”

All I could think about was Dez’s goods.

Dez’s brows rose. “No guy’s junk needs to be on display for her to take pictures of.”

“What about your junk?” she challenged.

“Wait. What?” I belatedly got in on the conversation. “Can we not talk about guys’ junk?”

He grinned as his gaze collided with mine, and I knew he was thinking the same thing I was. I turned before my cheeks burned off my face, and was tackled by my sister.

She hugged me tight enough that I squeaked. “I’m going to miss you,” she cried, head buried in my shoulder. “But have fun. Okay? And be safe. Promise?”

“Promise.” I blinked back sudden tears. Since Danika had been born, we hadn’t been separated longer than a handful of hours.

Danika stepped back, her smile wobbly. She ducked her chin as Dez strode into the room and picked up my suitcase. Together, we followed him to the ground level.

Herding two small children into the kitchen, Claudia glanced up with a tired smile as she passed us by. One of the toddlers was in his true skin; the other had only phased one wing. I stopped, watching them as the little one hopped, got some air with its one wing and then landed a second later, laughing in high-pitch squeals.

“Kids are frightening,” Danika murmured.

“I don’t know.” I smiled. “They’re kind of cute.”

Our father waited inside the foyer. As Dez disappeared outside with my suitcase, I walked up to him. He smiled, and I noticed how deep the skin crinkled around his eyes. He looked weary but happy.

He placed his hands on my shoulders, heaving a long breath. “Tell me I’m making the right decision by letting you travel with only him.”

“You are.” A knot moved into my throat. I was itching to get out of this house, but there was a part of me that hadn’t been prepared for the emotion behind leaving my family, if only for a little while. “I’ll be okay.”

“I know you will.” He sighed again. “I trust Dez. He’s a good Warden and I know he won’t let anything happen to you. He cares for you deeply, always has.”

I glanced out the open steel doors, watching Dez shut the back hatch on the SUV.

“Answer a question for me, sweetheart.”

My gaze returned to my dad. “Yes?”

“Do you still have feelings for him?” he asked.

I started to reply but stopped. Everything about Dez was complicated, and how I felt about him even more so. There was such an ugly, messy ball of hurt that had lingered after he’d left, but just thinking about him made my heart jump and my stomach tumble. “I do, but...”

“But he left?”

I didn’t respond, but he knew. Dad had been there during the worst; the days and weeks immediately following Dez’s unexpected departure. How many times had I asked Dad why? There had never been an answer.

My father pulled me in for a quick hug that felt good, grounding. I would miss him, my sister and my clan, but as he pulled back, I knew I was getting a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.

He smiled as he patted my cheek. “Go easy on him.”

At first I thought that was a strange thing to say, but then suspicion rose. “Do you know why he left?”

Dad nodded. “I do, Jasmine, but it’s not my story to tell. It never has been.”

Chapter Eight

The couple-hour drive down Interstate 87 was blissfully uneventful and also very beautiful. The rolling hills were a lush green, the trees thick and stately, but the almost pristine wilderness gradually gave way to buildings larger than the tallest trees as we neared the city. My face was practically planted against the side window the whole time as I soaked in everything I saw.

“You haven’t been this far south?” Dez asked, and I looked over at him. One hand on the steering wheel, the other on his thigh.

I shook my head.

He grinned as he sent me a sideways glance. “You used to sneak out to fly when I was around. I’m sure you didn’t stop.”

“I sneaked out a time... or two afterward.” At his wry look, I smiled. “But I never flew south. I always went north. I didn’t want....”

“To get caught?” He laughed at my innocent expression. “That’s smart. You probably would’ve been seen if you came south.”

Driving to the city took a little more than three hours, but it took less than thirty minutes for one of us to fly. If I had dared to venture south out of curiosity, I would’ve been caught due to all the Wardens that covered the city, and I wouldn’t have been surprised if my dad locked me up.

It wasn’t too long before the last of the high hills cleared and New York City came into view in the distance. I leaned forward, grasping the dashboard. “Wow.”

“It’s something, isn’t it?”

I nodded as my eyes widened. The city created its own skyline, an elegant stretch of buildings against the backdrop of blue skies, some tall enough that they seemed to have their very own stairway into Heaven. I could almost imagine what it looked like at night, all lit up, dazzling and awe-inspiring. My heart thumped in my chest as the giddy realization that I would get to see that with my own eyes sunk in.

Traffic slowed as we crossed over one of the long, wide bridges, and only then did I feel Dez’s stare on me.

I looked at him. “What?”

He didn’t say anything as he picked up my hand and brought it to his mouth. Against the center of my palm, he placed a kiss, and my heart did another jump, this time a backflip. I started to ask why he’d done that, but realized that question would sort of ruin the moment and it was a very nice moment.

Instead, I smiled.

It took an absurd amount of time to make it into the city, to the point where the buildings were so tall and so crowded that they blocked most of the sun and the streets were in their shadows.

Dez parked the SUV in a large garage and I followed him to the back, my eyes darting over the never-ending line of cars snuggled tight in their parking spaces.

Too much was roaming through my head as I trailed after him, into the ground floor of one of the tall buildings we’d passed. There wasn’t much I knew about Dez’s plans for this trip. No matter how annoying I got demanding details, he wouldn’t tell me anything, but since he was carrying our luggage inside, that meant we had to be staying here. I could barely contain the squeal as I’d been worried we’d do a drive-by through the city. I had wanted to
enjoy
it.

A young woman behind the desk looked up when Dez and I approached. She blinked twice at Dez and then smoothed a hand over her already neatly coiffed hair. Her gaze moved to me once and then centered back on Dez as if I didn’t even exist.

I folded my arms.

“How can I help you?” she asked, smiling as though Dez was her own personal sun.

Dez leaned against the counter, one side of his mouth curled up. I rolled my eyes. “We have a reservation.”

We did? As Dez took care of our check-in, I noticed that he mentioned only one room, but I was too fascinated by everything around me to make an issue of it. As lame as it sounded, I’d never been inside a hotel before, and especially not one as trendy as this.

The lighting was dark and mysterious. Rock music wafted from unseen speakers. Black and red couches lined the walls, low to the ground and level with the tables. A bar separated the lounge area from the dining section. All the staff, male and female, wore black and looked as if they’d just stepped off a runway.

I glanced down at my jeans and T-shirt and raised my brows. I really didn’t fit in.

“Ready?” Dez asked.

Nodding, I turned and discovered the clerk watching him wistfully. Who could blame her? It wasn’t until we stopped at the elevator that I thought to ask, “Where’s our luggage?”

“They’re taking it up to the room for us.” He placed a hand on my lower back, guiding me into the mirrored elevator. Once inside, he waved a card in the air as he grinned. “Your eyes are so big, they’re about to pop out of your face.”

I flushed. “I’m sorry. I probably look like an idiot, but I’ve—”

“You don’t look like an idiot.” He reached up, tucking my hair back behind my ear.

The elevator moved smoothly, clicking away at the floors. “I know I look like I’ve never been anywhere.”

“It’s cute.” He draped his arm over my shoulders, causing me to stumble into his side. “And stop worrying about it. This is for you. Have fun.”

Reassured that I didn’t look like a total loser, I was bursting at the seams by the time the elevator stopped on the twentieth floor and the doors slid open. We hung a right and followed the curving hallway until Dez stopped in front of our room.

A knot formed in my belly.
Our room.
I doubted Dez had gotten one with two beds.

Dez opened the door after the handle showed a little green dot. How high-tech. Cool air greeted us as we stepped in. He moved out of the way, letting me investigate. In the small hallway, I found a closet and a door leading into the bathroom. A separate shower, wide enough to fit two people, was on one side, and a large circular tub on the other.

Clasping my hands together, I inched past a wet bar and a desk and into the main part of the room. A large TV was attached to the red wall...and across from it was a bed big enough for four people. My cheeks heated as I glanced away. Aside from a small chair under the TV, there was no other place for anyone to sleep. We’d be sharing a bed tonight. I wasn’t going to think about that right now.

I hurried toward the curtains and threw them open. Holy crap. Leaning forward, I pressed my forehead against the pane of glass as I stared down at the busy street below.

“Do you like the room?” asked Dez.

“Yes,” I whispered, and then louder, “Yes, I do.”

“This is supposedly one of the nicest hotels in the city, or so I’ve been told.” His voice was closer. “I figured we could stay for two nights and then leave Thursday morning. That should give you time to really see Manhattan and also give us enough time to get down to DC. You’ll only have a day there before our seven days are up, but I guess we can stay longer, if that’s what you want.”

As I stared out the window, my throat worked hard to swallow the sudden emotion clogging it. I knew that most males wouldn’t have gone to this amount of trouble. Sure, they would’ve attempted to woo me, but to meet all my demands and not fight me on my desire to enjoy the simplest of freedoms? Not likely. But Dez was doing all of these things. There was something to be said for that, but I wasn’t sure words would do justice to the feelings working through me. I had a feeling that if I attempted to tell him I’d mess it up somehow.

“Jas?” Uncertainty threaded through his tone.

Dropping the curtains, I spun around and launched myself at him. Dez caught me around the waist, stumbling back a step as I wrapped my arms around him, squeezing tight.

“Thank you.”

“What?” He laughed.

My face was buried in his chest, so I lifted my head and repeated, “Thank you.”

He looked at me. “You’re welcome.”

I didn’t think he understood the depth of my gratitude. Stretching up, I placed a kiss against his cheek. I knew it wasn’t much, but it was something, wasn’t it? When I pulled away, he was staring at me as if I was insane.

Then he lifted me off my feet and turned. “I would’ve brought you here the moment I returned if I knew it would make you
this
happy.”

A laugh caught in my throat as a different look seeped into his eyes. The hue brightened and then his lids became heavy as his lips parted. Slowly, he let me slide down so that I was on my feet, but he still held me to him with one arm. He cupped my cheek, smoothing his thumb along the curve of my bottom lip. Every nerve in my body zeroed in on that touch of his. His chin lowered, and I thought he would kiss me. My eyes fluttered shut and anticipation rose sweetly.

But the kiss never came.

He let me go, stepping back. “Well, we better get going if you want to see as much as you can.”

The pang of disappointment surprised me, but I nodded. It was probably better this way, though. Because I had wanted him to kiss me, and it didn’t have a thing to do with any of our conditions.