Bittersweet Endeavors (21 page)

“
But,
”
she began,
and
stopped herself.  She wanted him
, but more so,
she wanted him to
want her
, too
.  She couldn’t deny that their closeness felt wrong
, morally and
lawfully
, but by God, she didn’t care.

“We can’t go any further.  I shouldn’t have taken such liberties,
Myra
. 
I apologize
.”  His voice came on a
husky
,
ragged whisper.  He turned
away from her
, but she
saw
that
pleasure
still labored his breathing.

“Make love to me, Seth,” she whispered. 
The words left her mouth before she realized what she had said, but she didn’t care. 
His to
uches filled the emptiness she
had
felt since
she
le
ft
England
.  She never thought her sadness and loneliness
could be
healed by his affections, but the pangs of despair that
brought
her
daily tears
had been
replaced by
joy
.  
She placed her hand
on his shoulder and leaned her head onto his back
.  “Please,” she said
in
a rushed breath.
 

If
ever a
sound of pure agony
was
heard
, it came within Seth’s
groan
.
 
He turned around and held her in his arms
, and
Myra
caressed his cheek with the tips of her fingers.

“
Myra
, there’s
naught
more
I
rather do than
lay you down right here and make love to you.  Truly,
tis nothing more,
” he said
,
pained.  “But
tis
not right.”

“Because I’m a servant,
”
she said. 
Of course, she thought.  No one of his
station
would want someone like her. 
T
he handsome and wealthy Seth Preston
who
would
soon
be
betrothed
and it was
to the most beautiful woman in Jamestown
.  Myra was inconsequential within Seth’s set ambitions
.  She
noticed
how the women in town looked at him,
as well as
Cassandra.  What a fool
she was
thinking
that
he found more interest in her than his usual flirtation
s
.  She interpreted his pity for something more.   She wanted to gather her skirt and run to the furthest corner of the earth. 
She felt humiliated
and
could just
die from the embarrassment of it all!  How could she disgrace herself so?

“It has
naught
to do with you being a servant
,” he said harshly.  “
Certainly
you know by now that you’re
much more than that
,
Myra
,
”
he added more softly.

She didn’t reply.  W
hat could she say?  Perhaps she
was
m
ore than a servant
in his eyes
, but so had
Lucia’s mother been
to
Anvil, and he now hates her.  God help her, she didn’t want that
happening
between her and Seth. 

“
Myra
, you deserve better than this
.
”
He waved his
hand
and
display
ed
the area
which surrounded
them
.  “
Taking you here
, in secret
as tis
something to be ashamed of
is
n
’
t
what
I want.
”

“I’m sorry,” she whispered.  “I shouldn’t have asked
and
shal
t
not
ask
ever again
.”

His smile broad
ened
and her cheeks burned like fire. 
Myra
turned away.

“
Myra
, there’s
naught
wrong with you asking
.  It
warms my heart
knowing
that
you want me the way I desire you.” 
H
is hand guided her chin
and forced
her t
o look him in the eye
.  “I hold you in too high esteem
and sha
lt not
ca
st your virtue aside when I cannot
yet
offer a promise of more.
Can you understand that?”

He cared for her.  A tear fell down he
r cheek and he pulled her close
within the warmth of his broad chest. 

“
Do you truly care for me, Seth
?”
Her tears
dampened his shirt
when
her head
rested
on his chest.  Yet what was ahead for him and
Cassandra? 
Would
he
marry Cassandra and think to
keep Myra
as
his paramour after he married?

“Oh, my sweet
,
Myra
,
of course I care for you.  More than you know.”

“There’s been talk, Seth.”  Anvil paced the woven rug
aside
the fireplace
in the Preston Man
or
.
A twitch in his cheek made
way to reveal his anger.  “Talk of you and that indenture,” he added with a heavily
laden
sigh.

“What talk would that be,
f
ather?” Seth asked evenly.  He knew i
t wouldn’t take long before the
chatter
re
ached his father’s ears, and he
had
dreaded
th
e
expected confrontation
.

Anvil paused and his graying brows angled downward
and
form
ed
a perfect
V
.  One
fist rose into the air and
mad
e harsh contact with the mantle
.  T
he motion
shook
the contents
atop
the hearth
and
a
vase
fell and
shatter
ed on
the floor
. 

“You know full well what talk.  If there
’
s any truth in it
, I’ll
forbid you to see her
, ever!
  Furthermore, I’ll sell her contract to someone
in another
colony
,
far away from our own
, and away from you
.”

Hot blood of anger coursed through Seth's veins.  Just the mere thought of someone else as
Myra
's employer made his temper flair, let alone the thought of never seeing her again.

“I was
n
’
t aware you’ve taken so
much consideration
in
the blather
that circulates around this household,
f
ather,” Seth bit out. 
“
Dallying
in the servant
s
chambers again?”

His father flinched, and although Seth surprised
himself
by his own audacity, it
didn’t make a
difference.  He
’d
fight
with all the power he possesse
d
to
keep
Myra
at the plantation, and in his life.

“I’ll not tolerate such insolence.”

Any other time, Seth would
have
apologize
d
for
his
display
of
disrespect
, but he refused
his father a retraction.  “
Myra
is a friend, and I’ll not stand by and have the servants or you
prating
on
about her or
m
e.
”

“What are your intentions with this servant?  Have you bedded her?”

His directness
caught
Seth off
guard.  He didn’t expect such
candor
. 
He wanted
their relationship
out in the open—h
is
love and
intent
to marry
Myra,
but
he
p
romise
d
her
that he
’d
keep their
union
secret
. 
He treasured
the
stolen moments
they share
d
,
and
if
it was
his decision alone
,
he
’d
remove her from
the
grueling daily tasks and present her with the life she deserve
d
. 
Unfortunately,
his father
sill dislike
d
her, and
Se
th understood
why Myra thought
best
in
keeping
their relationship silent—at least for the time being.

“
Nay
, I ha
ven
’t bedded her.”  Seth turned,
his
attention
drawn
to
Margaret
as she entered the
room.  She caught the
latter
end of their conversation
and
attempted a quick
, discreet
exit.  But Se
th called her back and hoped
she
’d aid
his cause
.

“Margaret,”
Seth called. “Considering you’
ve spent much time of late with
Myra
, can you
please
explain that there
is
naught
for
father to worry
about
; t
hat our time together has been
exceedingly
proper and there’s
only
friendship betwixt us?
”

Margaret squirmed in the seat
that
she
had taken
reluctantly near her father. 
Seth kn
ew
s
he hate
d
lying
,
but
it was
a small favor to ask. 
Aside from that
, he
had
spent the latter weeks
covering
for
Margaret’s disappearances
so she and Zachary could spend time together.  Did
n’t she
owe him
a favor
in return?

“Well,
Myra
is
a lovely young woman, and
if the rumors speak true
of she and Seth
, I
would think it a good match
.”

Seth pierced
her with a
hard
gaze
. 
Anvil looked accusingly at Seth but directly posed his q
uestion to
ward
Margaret.  “Is there
more than
a
friendship between your brother and that indenture?”