Black Widow (37 page)

Preston doesn’t seem fazed by the gun, only hurt is written all over his face as he reaches out to her. “You could have told me. I would have understood. You were enough. I loved you and a part of me did die when I thought you jumped off that bridge.”

“You didn’t love me. How could you love me and fuck those other woman?”

“It was just sex. It’s a release. A way to have a good time. I only fucked them. I made
love
to you. I came
home
with you. I wanted a
family
with you. You’re the one that ruined that. If you would have just told me you didn’t want to go anymore then I would have realized what was really important and stopped.”

Calmly, he takes a step forward, reaching for me to move behind him.

“But you said you had needs,” Kim says as her voice starts to shake slightly.

“Yes, but my needs also involved having you in my life.”

“So you would have stopped?” Her arm drops a little as her tight grip fades slightly around the gun.

I watch silently as he takes a closer step toward her, “Yes. I would have. The night you jumped I made up my mind quickly that I would. There was no question to it really. My needs for you were much bigger than my needs for a sex club. I only kept going after you died because I didn’t have you.”

“How can you say that? I asked you to stop and you said no.”

“Kim, you never said anything until you stood on that bridge. If you would have just talked to me, told me how you felt. I never wanted to put you in a situation that made you uncomfortable. I can’t believe you weren’t honest with me and told me that you didn’t like it. God Kim, that’s heart breaking to hear. I was your husband. The one person you should have trusted in the world and I led you to do things with your body that you didn’t like. I’m so ashamed and so sorry.”

I watch as Kim stares blankly at Preston, completely emotionless.

“Now please. Drop the gun. This is not the way to settle this,” Preston says as he reaches out for her.

“It’s too late. My life was over a year ago. I guess it’s finally time for it to be over for good,” she responds.

I watch in horror as she raises the gun to her head and without a second thought, pulls the trigger.

“No!” Preston yells as he reaches toward her but it’s too late.

Her body falls like a cut down tree, landing on the ground with a loud thump. Preston falls around her, lifting up her lifeless body as he starts to cry.

I walk up, rubbing my hand on his back not sure what to say. I’ve been in his shoes. Even though it’s been a few years, and with everything she just put him through, I know this is still the hardest moment in his life.

Thankfully, Nicholas comes running in the door after he heard the gunshot. I hear him call 911 and tell them there’s been a shooting and someone was dead but everything else is a blur.

I stare as Preston cries over her lifeless body saying things like, “Why?” and “This didn’t have to happen,” and “I loved you.”

The last one hurt but I know I can’t take it personally. I love my husband to this day and a part of me always will.

After the paramedics are gone and the place is cleared out, I look at Preston who’s got a look of complete loss on his face.

“Are you ok?” I ask as I wrap my arms around his body, showing him that I’m still here and not going anywhere.

Thankfully, he hugs me back. “Yeah, I’m so sorry you had to witness that. I still can’t believe she was alive this entire time.”

“Yeah. Pretty crazy, but I want to know how
you’re
doing?”

He looks me in the eyes, “Thank you. Thank you for caring about me. For understanding what I’m going through right now. For wanting to help me. And for loving me.”

I don’t need to say anything. It’s all been said so I lean over, kiss his soft lips and hug him as tightly as I can.

“I
don’t know if I’m ready,” I say to Preston as we park in front of Bridge.

Preston reaches over, grabbing my hand, “This is what Becca would have wanted. You know that just as much as I do.”

I smile up at him, knowing if she were here right now she would kick my ass for doubting getting out of the car. I laugh to myself as I picture it in my head. Preston’s right. We owe her this.

Life has been good these past six months. I ended up buying the place I had my eyes on and, not only is Preston helping me remodel it, but we’re making it our home together. Both of us are ready to move forward together and forget about our dark pasts.

Only we’re not alone now. I’m five months pregnant and we just found out we’re having a girl. There was no question as to what her name would be. Rebecca Lynn Babcock is due on June 23rd. Though it was a complete surprise, both of us are ecstatic to welcome a baby girl into our lives.

It’s amazing how things worked out. Preston and Kim tried to have a baby for years and they could never make it happen, while Nick and I froze his sperm with hope of a day that never came. Preston and I weren’t even thinking about it and surprise! It was the best moment of my life when I saw that plus sign, clear as day, telling me I was going to be a mommy.

Pregnancy has been good to me and I only have a slight baby bump so I promised Preston we’d go to the club again before I started to look like I was about to pop. We don’t plan on playing with anyone else though, tonight is just for us.

I slip my mask down my face as we slip out of the car and down the dark alley. It feels so good to be back.

We’re greeted with a knowing grin by the security guard at the door. Though the club is still private with no names and masks, Preston introduced me to the staff once I officially took over Becca’s role.

They’re not to greet us in a different manner or let people know who we are but the smile I get in return soothes my nerves, welcoming me back home.

Even though I’ve been back in the building, it was during the day so it didn’t feel real. But as I walk in now, I’m taken back to my first time with Becca. The night I met Preston, and my life was changed forever.

A calmness wraps around me making me smile. I feel her. She’s here with us, forever.

The next morning, while I’m waiting for my drink at Starbucks, I run through how much my life has changed. How I went from being a lonely, workaholic, basket case to a confident, sexy, woman who is madly in love and pregnant in the span of a few months, will forever baffle me. I’m so thankful for everything my life has become.

“I have a dirty chai for Rebecca on the bar,” I hear the barista call out.

A bubbly woman, with short brown hair gives me a warm smile as she walks up, grabbing her drink and walking out the door.

I have to laugh as I whisper up in the air, “Love you, girl.”

Lost In You
by Three Days Grace

• This song came on when Kamii turned on Pandora, listening to music for the first time.

Blow Me Wide Open
by Saint Asonia

• Preston plays this when he’s trying to drown out the steel drum beat.

Comatose
by Skillet

• This plays after Preston first spends the night with Kamii.

Black Widow
by Iggy Azalea

• Ha! I’m hoping I don’t have to explain this one ;-)

Writing
Black Widow
was an extremely different process than both
Unwritten
and
Rewritten
. When I wrote those books, I only had dreams of one day publishing them and I worked on them for over a year before they were actually released. With this book, I knew it would be released and that made me somewhat more nervous.