Blackness Within (55 page)

“You were going to marry a man you don’t even know! Then your junkie brother and O’Sullivan play your heroes. That was my job,” he growls into my face. “And do you come back to me? NO! You hide and when I find you, you send me away. After everything I did for you! Then you pulled your slutty stunt at the Royals game. I was so disgusted with you. I stood in that stadium, ready to take you away from this toxic life you were living. But I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t stomach the idea that in six months you had given yourself to three men. You’ve turned into a whore just like your mother,” he seethes.

I flick my eyes to Roman. He’s my only hope at this point. I need him to save me. Ben catches me and tsks me like a child.

“After all of this you still want him? He isn’t who you think he is. He’s not a drug kingpin. He’s not a criminal. He’s not anything he told you was. His name isn’t even Roman Vojtech.”

I hold Roman’s midnight gaze and see regret marring his features. Even the dragon on his neck seems to be holding his head in shame. I don’t understand.

Roman

Motherfucking piece of shit! I want to rip this pissant’s head from his body and shit down his neck. I almost have my left arm free. I need him to stay focused on Natasha so I can work my way out of the bounds I allowed myself to be put in.

I’ve been watching Ben Horowitz for months. We knew he hacked into us after we found the money he moved. I already had Natasha for months at that point. The Vojtech Bratva believed Blake had stolen my son and my money. I had to make him pay in order to remain the omnipotent head of the crime syndicate. Ben was just a hiccup in this fucked situation, or so I thought.

I didn’t plan to take Natasha. I planned on holding her for a few weeks and then faking her death. But I couldn’t let her go. Ben didn’t just steal Bratva money. He put Natasha and Blake in grave danger with his ignorance about the criminal world. I had to make deals and kill a few people in order to keep Natasha alive and at my side.

I fell in love with her. She doesn’t even know who I am. I couldn’t tell her. I couldn’t show her. I had to hurt her. I had to break her. I had to rip her soul from her body to do my job and I loathe myself for it. If I had treated her the way she deserves, they way I wanted to, we’d both be dead.

Four and a half years undercover for the DCA and I found the woman that made me want to walk away from it all. If it weren’t for Igor, my best friend and partner for the last fifteen years, I would have blown the op and ran away with Natasha.

I have a tracker in my shoe. I’ve been watching Ben and Natasha since the fire. He’s been stalking her while I stalk him. I’ve spent time watching Natasha on my own too. I almost ruined her. Slowly, she’s building herself back up into the strong woman I was forced to crush. Brian O’Sullivan brings out a light glow from her that I never experienced. I was never allowed that joy in life. I don’t deserve that kind of joy in life. But I wanted it with Natasha.

I wanted everything with her. A man like me doesn’t get that type of reward for the life I’ve lived. So, I watched her illuminate in front of my eyes under another man’s watchful loving gaze. When she called out O’Sullivan’s name in her sleep, I did the right thing. I took that picture and forced him to back away. If the Bratva found out Natasha had a weakness for him, they would have killed him without thought. I saved the man’s life that stole the only good thing in mine.

When I saw it the first time, the way she responded to him, it was a dagger to the soul. I knew in that moment I never had the real Natasha. I had the victim fighting to survive. O’Sullivan has the real Natasha. I decided to let her go that day. Knowing she was fulfilled in his embrace, I couldn’t take her away from that. I’d done enough damage. Enough.

I still needed to protect her. When the DCA alerted me that Ben was making moves with offshore accounts, I stalked his every move. There was no indication he was going after Natasha. The DCA wanted me to hang back so they could watch him work, possibly leading them to other criminal hackers. I didn’t perceive the threat in its entirety. I never thought he’d use violence and drugs to get her. I was wrong. That’s rare. I’m going to fix this for her. I owe her and I owe Ben.

I alerted Igor of Ben’s movements tonight. He followed her to the hospital and made up a story about his dying father in order to isolate her. When he tazed her, I lost my shit. I wasn’t in position to stop his assault, so I pretended to let him get the jump on me after he loaded Natasha’s limp body in his Porsche.

I activated my tracker before I let Ben taze me. A grab team should be here soon. I don’t trust that Ben has this situation under control. He’s jittery and unsure. He’s a criminal, but the kind that hides behind a keyboard, not a semi-automatic.

He drugged Natasha and me. I’ve been drugged with this type of nerve agent before, giving me a resistance to it. It’s worn off faster than Ben considered it might. He has no idea I’m completely functional. The drug paralyzes you and allows you to be awake and breathing on your own. You can feel everything that happens, but you can’t scream out to beg for help or fight against it. It’s a common torture device. One I’ve used on many people.

I’m going to kill this motherfucker. I’m going to rip his skinny ass limb from limb. He’s the reason I don’t have Natasha. He’s the reason I have the scent of her stuck in my lungs. He’s the reason my world was shattered when she walked away from me. He’s the reason she loves Brian O’Sullivan in a way she never cared for me. He’s the reason my life no longer has light.

Just as I’m getting my right arm free, Ben crawls on the bed on top of Natasha. My stomach clinches as I see his intent on his rat-like face. He’s going to rape her in front of me.

“Let’s make him watch,” he purrs in Natasha’s ear as her pale grey eyes plead with me to save her.

“I’m sorry,” I mouth as tears stream down her round cheeks.

Ben doesn’t notice me because he’s focused on raping a woman he professes to love. He rolls to the side and removes the quilt from her body. The idea of his hands on her sends rage boiling to the surface and I break the bounds, ripping the arm from the chair.

That’s when all hell breaks loose.

O’Sullivan

Zeus and I run about twenty blocks. I’m following him like I’m Timmy being led around by Lassie. I trust this dog though. He’s on a mission. There’s focus and purpose on his face as we pace each other.

We passed Natasha’s old road a while back. I was hoping that’s where Zeus was leading me. Wishing and praying that she came here to look at the remains of the house she worked so diligently for and lost. When Zeus passed it by without hesitation, I knew something more sinister was at play.

Is there someone from Blake’s past holding Natasha? Did a soldier in the almost dismantled Vojtech Bratva find her? Did she take a walk in the park and get hurt? Has someone attacked her? My mind is racing with the what ifs. I can’t stop my brain long enough to consider where I’m being dragged to.

Zeus puts his nose to the ground and begins to slowly lead me down a quiet street. I scan every house and attune my ears for any sounds of distress.

Nothing.

It’s tranquil other than my heaving breathing and Zeus’s snorting. I wish I had my phone. I’m alone with a dog and no weapon. I don’t know if Zeus will attack or halt on my command. He’s not going to hurt me, but what if he goes after an innocent person?

I push the worry from my mind as we pass small bungalows, Zeus still searching. Tall trees cast shadows beneath the streetlights as we move down the sidewalk, ominously silhouetting our path. I continue to search for anything familiar, listening for any pleas. Where is she?

Zeus yanks the leash in my hand abruptly as he finds what he’s looking for. I follow him across the street where he stops in front of a small white house. It’s tidy and well kept with flowers in boxes beneath the windows and a welcome mat on the front porch.

Zeus growls and snarls at the front door, but he doesn’t bark. He’s alerting me of the danger without announcing his presence.

“Okay, Zeus,” I whisper my understanding.

I move around the house silently while Zeus guards the front door. All of the blinds are drawn as I try to peer in the windows. I don’t hear a sound. Someone’s going to call the cops on a peeping Tom and I’m going to get arrested.

Zeus is here though. He brought me here. She has to be here too.

I move to the backdoor and jiggle the handle quietly. It doesn’t budge. I move around the other side of the house and find a brand new Porsche in the driveway. I don’t recognize the car. I cup my hands around my face and press my face to the passenger window.

It’s clean inside, no signs of blood or a struggle. It’s so pristine I wonder if it’s ever been driven. As I pull away from the glass, I feel something tickle my cheek. I swipe at what I believe is a spider web to find a long strand of platinum hair caught in my stubble. It’s attached to the car. I follow the silky clue and find a small clump of hair smashed in the top of the door.

Grey.

She’s here.

I drop her hair from my fingers and sprint back to the front of the house. Zeus has moved onto the porch, growling and gnashing his teeth.

“You’re all I’ve got other than these,” I say to Zeus showing him my fists. “Let’s go get her.”

Zeus leaps into the air, lunging at me to get fucking moving. That’s when I hear it. The feral howl of a man obliterating another as the assaulted cries out in pain.

I ram my heel into the door above the handle over and over until the wood splinters and Zeus races past me. I follow in his wake. At the end of a short hallway, I find myself entering a small bedroom. There’s a body toppled over in a chair and a man leaning over a bed. I look at the bed to see pale pink-painted toes and I launch.

Zeus is attacking the man on the floor. I don’t care. He can eat an innocent bystander. I have to get my woman. As Zeus snarls and rips at flesh, the man at the bedside turns and I see the dragon.

Vojtech.

Revenge.

Natasha

Ben’s going to rape me and I can do nothing to stop him or protest. I can’t see Roman anymore. Ben’s blocking my view as he removes the quilt from my body. His eyes are filled with hate and rage as he stares at me, promising me torture with his lifeless gaze.

I hear a loud pop and then Ben is gone. Wood smashes in the room as Roman roars. I force my eyes to where I hear the fight to find Ben passed out on the floor, having been flung into the chair that was holding Roman captive.

Then Roman turns to face me, his face full of fury as he approaches me. I have five toes wiggling, but that’s it. I can feel my throat bobbing in panic as Roman leans into my face.

“I’m so sorry, Natasha. None of this was supposed to happen. You were never supposed to get hurt. I’ll get you out of here safely. Don’t be afraid,” he whispers softly, kindly.

I’ve never heard this man be so sweet. It’s making me more scared. I hear a loud bang near the front of the house. Please be the police.

All of a sudden, I hear Zeus attacking and shift my eyes to find him demolishing Ben’s body on the ground. I have no desire to make him stop.