Blazed (34 page)

Ivy smiled to herself, then directed it up to me.
 "I have indeed, young man. Let me look at you both without those silly masks."

My fingers pulled at the strands of ribbon attached to Emmeline's mask. My god, I'd almost forgotten how divine she was. It damn near took my breath away. She seemed to go through the same motions when I removed my own mask, and something shifted and click into place. This woman was mine, and would be forever. I'd do anything
— anything, to make sure of it.

"Oh yes," Ivy gushed, "yes, you're perfect together. I'll be on tenterhooks waiting for news of your engagement." And approval from the Child of Cupid. We couldn't fail. My complications would have to be resolved, and quickly. I couldn't risk leaving anything to time or chance.

I took Emmeline's left hand in mine and kissed the emerald on her finger, then kissed her soft, pink lips. "Actually Ivy, I concreted my intentions to keep the lovely Emmeline just this afternoon."

"Oh!" Ivy snatched her hand from my grip to critique the ring.
 "Beautiful, simply beautiful. Like the lady herself. "Masks back on, my loves! We must celebrate!"

AND BOY DID we celebrate. From that day, my life would become about celebrating every day I had with that girl. As hungover as we were, we made love through the night, slept only briefly and started again in the morning. It didn't matter to me that she jumped up to be sick because we both laughed about it, and laughter was something my life had seen too little of. Love like ours came around once in a lifetime, as did women like Emmeline. And yes, I had to celebrate that.

We fooled around in the lift down to breakfast like we were already newly-weds, hands always on each other and nearly always lips. Dressed in our formal outfits from the mixer, we looked dishevelled but peaceful, focused only on each other. That lift ride might have been the single-most best moment in my life. It was the moment I knew our fates were inextricably juxtaposed. No matter what, we would always be connected. 

It made me smile to watch Emmeline crane her neck to look around at the impressive structure of the hotel. I don't think she even realised she was doing it, and I'd been in enough expensive hotels, restaurants and venues to take it for granted, so I got a good view of her wide, awed eyes. They really were an amazing and unusual colour. I'd seen it elsewhere but just couldn't place it...

"So what do you hunger for, Miss White?" I shoved her gently when she gave me that look. I wanted that too, but she needed to refuel first. I had a week left before I had to resume caring duties and I had big plans to spend most of it admiring that starry-eyed look she got when I'd made her come so hard her head spun. "Something that doesn't involve one or both of us making sex noise."

"But where's the fun in that? I'm actually jonesing for black coffee and scrambled eggs." She had no idea how good it felt for me hear her talk about being hungry. The idea that she might go back down the road of anorexia someday put the fear of God in me. I wouldn't be able to watch her suffer
— I'd suffer with her.

"After the pounding you just got, are they not already scrambled?" She tried to look affronted but failed. I hoped I hadn't accidentally touched a raw nerve.

"Look, see. Scrambled eggs on toast. Perfect. If I eat real quickly, we can get back up to that big ol' bed before check out time and you can bash my head against the headboard a few more times."

"Okay!" Now she was talking! "Chop chop, vixen. I have plans for us this afternoon."

"Oh?" Her face lit up like a kid at Christmas. The woman was bloody insatiable and I loved it. Her greed for me was a real turn on, just one on a long and extensive list.

"Not
 those plans. God woman, you'll kill me before the honeymoon." 

All of a sudden, she turned away. Dread bubbled in my stomach. Had she changed her mind?

"So you know, I'm really in no rush to—"

"Me either." I was quick to reassure her. As eager as I was to make her my wife, and despite the wrongs I had to set right before that could happen, I wasn't going to push her harder than she wanted. Too many people had done that to her in the past. I knew she needed the control, that's why she looked so relieved.
 "I'm still not done terrorising you. It's been less than a day, there's no need to rush it all now when we have all the time in the world."

ESME caused a welcome distraction, walking in looking like Death himself. While the girls spoke, I took the opportunity to admire how amazing Emmeline looked even when hungover. She had come so far from the waif in baggy clothes and looked like she was, herself, expensive. Maybe even worth millions. Luxury suited her and she wore it well. It was like a kick in the nuts every time I saw her— I couldn't believe my luck.

Unable to keep our hands off each other when we weren't talking to someone, we stumbled out onto the open terrace attached to the dining room, barely keeping our coffees from spilling. My fast reactions saved the cups when she ground to a standstill right in front of me, face draining of colour like she'd seen a ghost.

"Emmeline?" 

A hesitant croak left her mouth and she stepped back, gaze fixed on the other three guests sitting with Esme. "Oh, um... hello."

Henry and Ivy sat on either side of Tallulah, the daughter I'd been fortunate enough to avoid at the mixer, still dressed in their evening clothes sans masks. They'd been nice enough to put us in one of their suites when we stumbled across the street from
 
The Roses
 with our female companions barely able to hold themselves straight. 

And they were looking at Emmeline the same way she was looking at them. Stunned. Mortified. Maybe even confused.

"Henry," I took the coffee cup from Emmeline's hand before her white knuckle grip snapped the handle and urged her towards the table, "you know of my best girl?"

"I should say so, as
 
your
 
best girl is also 
my
 
best girl." 

Emmeline made the strangest noise of shame, guilt and woe. It took a moment to register why she looked so green around the gills, but when it did, I pulled her back into the dining room, completely dumbstruck.
 She was the missing Tudor— the daughter who wouldn't play house. No wonder she held herself so well around a high-end crowd. She 
was
 
worth millions herself, even if she was living like a bum on bookshop wages. 

I didn't know how the hell to react. She wasn't helping matters by looking so ashamed.
 "Why the hell didn't you tell me Henry and Ivy are your parents?"

"You didn't ask?" The obtuse retort pissed me off. If she could be so honest about everything else, why was this such a big secret? Did she think I'd start trying to chip away at her hidden fortune? Didn't she fucking know me at all? "You know enough about my family to know that I'm not an active member. If it doesn't matter to me, it shouldn't matter to you."

But it did. It mattered a lot because she was the daughter of a man I respected deeply. Hell, if I'd have known, I'd have proposed properly so he didn't feel like his dear daughter had been short changed. I would have asked his god damn permission like a gentleman. I owed him that for all the times he'd helped me.

And that was when it clicked. Henry was always happy to help me, and this time, I needed help to make his little girl happy for the rest of her life. He had the power to do things I'd struggle to do
— make plans I couldn't even dream of concocting. He could be my greatest ally, and he could help me set this right.

"You're right." I grabbed Emmeline's hands and pulled her up to her feet, wrapping her arms around my neck so I could kiss her. She was worth all that I would have to do, and she was worth it to Henry too. The first little while would be tough while I was forced to keep her at arm's length, but after that, she'd always be happy because I'd make sure of it. I'd devote my life to it. "So if you don't mind, I'm going to go and find out if you come with a dowry."

"What? Hey!" Feeling lighter already, I took our plates from the approaching waiter and rejoined the Tudors and Esme, putting Emmeline's down in between Esme and Ivy so she could eat while I spoke to Henry. She needed that energy even more now— I would be flaming for her when I got her alone.

"Henry, old boy. I believe it's customary for me to seek your blessing. Let's take a walk."

WE walked down to the trellis at the bottom of the hotel's garden before I braced myself the way I always did before I begged a favour from Henry. This had to be by far the biggest ask I had for him, and I technically owed him thousands.
 

"You had no idea, did you?" He shocked me by talking first, reaching up to one of the honeysuckle blossoms. "You thought she was just a broken girl you picked up from the gutters and turned into a queen. Your queen."

"She was already a queen, I just helped her see it." Nodding, he turned back to me, brow arched expectantly. The man could read me so well— he knew there was more. "Henry," I rasped, hands balling into fists at my sides, "I want to be upfront with you. I love your daughter and I'd love nothing more than to marry her with your blessing. But there are things that stop me. Things nobody knows."

He listened patiently while I told him about the side of my life nobody save
— the part that forced me to keep my distance from Emmeline. I explained how Natasha had been diagnosed just as we were due to head out on tour and considered being with me her dying wish. I explained how we married in secret quickly so I'd get everything when I was gone— my reward for humouring her when she knew how much I'd be sacrificing. And I explained why the situation was particularly bothersome— the lies and the betrayal that meant I deserved my life back with what I'd earned. When I finished, he nodded and looked out across the room to the table where the women in his life sat.

"So what exactly is it you're after, son? My blessing to carry on keeping secrets from my daughter, or my help so you can live happily ever after?"

"Both. But right now, mostly the help." Bowing my head, I stepped back and paced the grass restlessly. "I've played it over a thousand times in my head and I see no way out. I can't lose Emmeline now I've found her. But I've paid my dues, six years of them."

Henry's hand clapped down on my shoulder. It was a gesture that provoked a sigh of relief. I knew that his brutal refusal came with a handshake. He was on my side. "It's a tricky one, but I'll help you, son. Anything to keep that smile on her face."

"And in the meantime?"

He frowned. "Tell her the truth, but I suggest you word it very carefully. One wrong syllable and she'll go down like a lead balloon. Otherwise, welcome to the family."

His acceptance made me push out a breath I didn't realise I'd been holding. "You're sure that you're alright with this?"

"All is fair in love and war, young man. All manner of philandering, foul play and truth stretching is fair game. You did what you thought was right at the time, and retrospect is a bitch. Just keep Emmeline out of this. She doesn't need to know the ugly details."

A massive weight lifted off my shoulders. Like always, Henry would save me from trouble and make my dreams come true. Maybe this time I could repay him by making that beautiful daughter of his happy for the rest of her life after she'd been miserable for so long. It might just be enough his time and effort to see her happy.

BUT when we turned back to the terrace, she was gone. We exchanged confused glances before I ran back up to the dining room and searched inside, hoping that Emmeline was there with Ivy and Esme. But nothing. Dread took over again. When she always worried that I'd never come back, it was me that worried she wouldn't wait. All the men she took home in my absence, the way she didn't chase me... I never really believed that I was enough. Now I had my proof.

"I swear, Dad, I have no idea where they went!" Tallulah's grating bleat pulled me back out to the terrace, where Henry stood over his eldest daughter looking enraged. He didn't need to utilise years of learning her mannerisms to know that she was lying because it was written all over her face. In fact, she looked downright smug. "She just took off without touching her breakfast. Nothing new there. Oh, I lie," she turned her pig-eyed gaze on me and nodded down at the scrambled eggs still piping steam. "She did touch it. Your ring is in there somewhere."

"What?" Without forethought, I bolted over to the table and saw the emerald glinting up at me. "When did they go?"

"About five minutes ago." Tallulah turned back to the magazine she was reading and refused to look up. "She said something about telling you to go fuck yourself and your complications."

I didn't understand. All she knew was that my time for her was tight. I loved her
— I gave her a god damn ring so she knew. If it was too much, she should have said at the time instead of letting me announce it to the world.

I'd find out what the hell I'd done wrong, if it meant following her through hell and back. If we were over, just like that, I at least deserved a chance to make it right. I needed it so I wouldn't let the confusion kill me. She made me crazy enough to take that path if I had to live without her. She was the only reason I had to get away from my fucking wife. Without her, I was a sucker, waiting and hating myself for it.