Bookworm II: The Very Ugly Duckling (51 page)

“Your brother’s spell didn’t kill me,” Elaine said, keeping her voice level with an effort. He’d seen her shatter. He had to have assumed that she was dead. The gods knew it had taken hours before she’d even regained the slightest ability to
think
. “Do you remember the book of protective wards I was looking at? One of them saved my life.”

“Which is precisely what I want to hear,” Johan sneered. “Who
are
you?”

“Elaine,” Elaine said. Her temper couldn’t be allowed to flare, not now. She had to remain calm. “Do you remember the hot water I gave you?”

Johan nodded, surprise clearly visible on his face. He’d insisted on washing in his room, so Elaine had used magic to heat the water for him. But he’d forgotten to put in cool water before dipping his toe into the tub, scalding himself. Who would have known about that, but Johan himself – and Elaine? She had certainly never mentioned it to anyone else.

“You’re plucking things out of my mind,” Johan said. “I ... you’re
dead
.”

***

Johan couldn’t help feeling a quiet nagging doubt. He didn’t know just how far a glamour, combined with deceptive spells, could go; could they really pull thoughts out of his head? Or were they simply using magic to tell him something he wanted to hear? It wouldn’t be hard to think of memories Elaine and he shared that no one else would ... he stared at the form of his friend, feeling his heart harden in cold determination. The person who was wearing his friend’s form would
pay
.

“And you have stripped both your brother and father of their magic,” Elaine – or the person who was pretending to be Elaine – said. She turned to look at the statue of Johan’s mother – the statue that
was
Johan’s magic. “How many more are you going to hurt before you realise that you’ve gone off the right path?”

“And who are you,” Johan demanded, “to tell me which is the
right
path?”

“I’m your friend,” Elaine said. “Haven’t you done enough?”

“It isn’t enough,” Johan said. “The world is full of magicians who abuse their powers, who hurt and humiliate and kill those they deem beneath them. I was created to stop them.”

Elaine gave him a long considering look. “Is that what you really believe?”

“Why else,” Johan demanded, “would I even exist?”

“There may be a greater purpose for you,” Elaine pointed out. “Or you may be being misled by a voice in the back of your head.”

Johan felt a flare of anger. He couldn’t be angry at Elaine, no matter what she said, but the person wearing her form ... he’d kill him. But he also wanted to win the argument.

“If I hadn’t been there to testify against Jamal,” he said, coldly, “he would have gone free.”

“Perhaps,” Elaine said.

“There’s no doubt about it,” Johan snapped. “Do you think that the testimony of a group of
mundanes
would have stood up against magicians? That was why my father worked so desperately to bring me back under his control! I could be forced to recant my testimony and Jamal would go
free
! And he
did
go free.”

“He swore an oath,” Elaine said, quietly.

“Which he didn’t actually break,” Johan thundered. He stood up, leaning on the table like his father had done when he’d been yelling at his children. “And he was able to use my father’s oath to kill him!”

The thought was staggering. If Jamal hadn’t lost his own powers, he would have taken over House Conidian despite being in disgrace. Who would put the head of a Great House in the dock? Somehow, he doubted that Lady Light Spinner would have taken the risk. Jamal would not only have control over the family’s money, he would also have controlled the family’s patronage network. There could have been a very real risk of civil war.

“My brother will not be able to threaten the stability of the city again,” he finished. “And nor will anyone else!”

“Apart from you, it seems,” Elaine said, waspishly. “Or don’t you realise just how much trouble you’ve already caused?”

“Now they care,” Johan observed. “Where was their
concern
when I was being treated like an object?”

He stood up, lifting his hand. “You are not Elaine,” he snapped. “I saw Elaine
die
. And I will make you
pay
for impersonating her.”

***

Elaine almost panicked as Johan raised his hand. Despite Dread’s warning, it had honestly not seemed possible to her that Johan might not think that she was the
real
Elaine, even though hindsight suggested that it was at least a possibility. Part of her wanted to run, but she knew it would be futile; unlike most normal magicians, Johan didn’t seem to need line-of-sight to cast antipersonnel spells. Instead, she braced herself and jabbed her hand into her pocket, breaking the vial of Johan’s blood. The glass cut her hand – she hissed in pain – allowing their blood to mingle.

“I take you as my apprentice,” she said, out loud. The magic – subtle magic, but none the less powerful – crackled around her, forming the mental link. Johan had already given his consent when he had accepted her offer; he’d never thought to rescind it. “I choose to link my mind and magic to yours ...”

She closed her eyes, suddenly very aware of his presence. His magic didn’t seem to react at all to the oath, but his soul did; she felt her mind extend until it was touching the very edge of his mind. And, beyond, she could see the web of life he’d tried – so inadequately – to describe to her. It was strange and beautiful ... and
magic
. For the first time in her life, despite becoming a Bookworm, she really understood what magic truly was.

We manipulate it when we cast spells
, she thought,
but Johan is directly linked to the magic ...

But there was no time to admire it, not now. Their memories clashed together, flashing through their minds. Johan would see everything, she knew, from her first memories of the orphanage to the terrible moment when she’d turned to glass and shattered ... and slowly pulled herself back together. A stab of guilt passed through her mind as Johan saw it, their thoughts so close that his guilt was hers; he’d never even
tried
to restore her. But how could he have known that she would have survived?

Not your fault
, she thought, knowing that he would pick up her message – and the truth behind it.
Stop blaming yourself for problems that are not your fault
.

Her memories grew stronger, a blur that only seemed to reveal flickering images that made up the essence of
her
. Her first day at the Peerless School; her graduation, with few honours; the pain and shock of discovering that she was a Bookworm. Millicent’s stunned face as she realised that Elaine was capable of much more than she thought, Bee leaning over her the first night they’d made love ... she couldn’t help smiling at the shockwave of embarrassment and lust from Johan as he saw
those
memories. And the Witch-King’s looming presence as she threw the Blight’s wild magic at Kane, hoping to bring him down.

“I am who I am,” she said, out loud. Johan could no longer dispute it. Nothing could have created so complex an illusion. “Do you see me now?”

Johan’s memories opened up in front of her. His first set of magic tests, blurring into dozens of others; his father’s eagerness to prove his son’s magic turning to disappointment and shame that his son was so weak. Endless torments and humiliations, each one a reminder that he couldn’t protect himself from his own siblings, let alone outsiders. An isolated existence, broken only by the few times he’d managed to sneak outside and explore his hometown – and then the Golden City, when his family had
still
kept him prisoner. And, always, the threat of being murdered by his own family, just to conceal the fact that they had birthed a Powerless.

He isn’t touched by the Witch-King
, she thought, feeling a wave of relief that almost stunned her. Johan might have been touched by madness, grief and guilt, but he wasn’t under the Witch-King’s control. And that opened up all sorts of new options. If, of course, she could talk him out of imposing his rule on the city.

“I see you,” Johan said. She felt another stab of guilt, mingled with a set of thoughts of just what he had intended to do to the person he thought was impersonating his friend. “You’re alive!”

Her eyes snapped open as she felt him wrap his arms around her and hug her, tightly. “You’re alive!”

“Not if you crush me,” Elaine said, unsure if she actually spoke or thought the words. From what she’d read in books, the mind-merge would eventually recede, leaving them with a link that would be unbreakable, but nowhere near as intimate. All of a sudden, it was easy to see why so many apprenticeships became sexual relationships. “Or if you kill me.”

“I wouldn’t have killed you,” Johan protested. “I thought that you were ... someone pretending to be you.”

She knew that he was telling the truth, although he would not have hesitated to kill the person he thought was impersonating his friend. His only real friend, she knew now. Johan’s life had been so limited that he’d clung to Elaine as soon as she’d shown him kindness, kindness she hadn’t had to show. And she cared deeply about him, more than she’d ever realised. He reminded her far too much of herself.

“It’s all right,” she said, wrapping her arms around him. “But you have to stop this madness.”

Johan looked at her, a trace of betrayal in his eyes – and more, much more, in his thoughts.

“You’ve seen it too,” he said. “You
know
just how badly magicians treat mundanes. Surely I shouldn’t let them get away with it.”

Elaine hesitated. The hell of it was that she didn’t disagree, not completely. And she knew that he would see that doubt in her mind. If there was a way to strip magicians of their power, forcing them to live a normal life, the threat of using it might keep them in line. But it could also become the weapon of a tyrant, forcing magicians to serve him ...

“I think we have a more important problem right now,” she said, instead. “You caused a panic – and this house is likely to be destroyed. If I could get through the wards, the Inquisitors could also break through – and you would be killed. I won’t let that happen.”

Johan stared at her, bleakly. “So ... what do we do?”

“You come with me,” Elaine said. “We leave the Golden City for good.”

The thought was terrifying. She would have to sever her ties to the Great Library – and, even if she returned, it would never be the same. And she hated the thought of going outside the Golden City for longer than a few days, even though it was the only way to keep Johan alive. And if she failed to talk Light Spinner into supporting her, their life expectancy wouldn’t be very long at all.

Risky
, she knew. There was the knowledge in her head – and the sheer power Johan possessed, both valuable prizes for anyone with the nerve to try to take them. But she could see no alternative. Now that they were bonded, there was a good chance that Johan’s death would take her with him. And she couldn’t knowingly lead him to his death.

But the Witch-King was still out there ... and, now that she had seen the web of life, she suspected she knew where to start looking for him. If they could find and destroy him, they could return home as heroes ... or, at the very least, build lives that would remain stable.

“Come with me,” she said. She cast a spell that incinerated much of the study. The effort tired her, but it had to be done. “We’ll let everyone think that you died here.”

Johan followed her without arguing, although she could sense the questions drifting through his mind. She cast an illusion over him, rendering his body invisible, then sent a silent command to him to release the maid. Johan obeyed, undoing his spell as soon as Elaine waved her wand. The maid climbed to her feet and fled towards the servants quarters. Elaine watched her go, feeling a strange mixture of emotions. Half of them were from Johan.

“Dread can help us smuggle you away,” she started, then stopped. Dread
wouldn’t
; his oaths would force him to take Johan into custody or simply to kill him outright. Given the danger, Elaine suspected the latter. “No, concentrate on remaining completely invisible and just keep following me. And
don’t
touch anyone.”

“I won’t,” Johan promised. “And thank you.”

“We shall see,” Elaine said. “We shall see.”

Chapter Forty-Three

“Perhaps you would care to explain to me,” Light Spinner said, “precisely why you decided to hide Johan from the Inquisitors and then bring him to
my palace
?”

Elaine winced at the Grand Sorceress’s tone. Light Spinner had good reason to be angry, not least because of the Privy Council’s divisions and increasingly strident attempts to insist that Johan be killed or brought under firm control. At least, now that he was officially dead, such demands were being abandoned.

But several Family Heads are dead, killed by their oaths
, she thought.
The chaos has only just begun
.

“Because he represents a weapon we can use against the Witch-King,” she said. She’d filled Johan in on the missing part of her story during their walk to the palace, although he had picked up most of it from her mind. At least those memories weren’t embarrassing. “And because he doesn’t deserve to die.”

“An interesting argument,” Light Spinner observed, caustically. “Stripping someone of their magic isn’t a crime?”

“It isn’t actually against the law,” Elaine pointed out. It hadn’t been thought to be even theoretically possible, she knew. There were ways to prevent someone from using their magic, but not to actually take it from them. “And besides, he was well and truly provoked.”

Light Spinner’s eyes seemed to glare at her for a long moment, then she settled back in her chair. “Maybe,” she said, finally. “But you know that most of the world won’t see it that way.”

Elaine nodded. “Hence my decision to convince everyone that he was dead,” she said. “And that will ensure that the secret remains a secret.”

“Let us hope so,” Light Spinner said. “And what do you intend to do with your secret apprentice?”