Born to Rule (9 page)

Alicia noticed that her songbird seemed the slightest bit happy only when she was reading
Love Letters of a Forgotten Princess
. If she happened to look up as she read, she could see an almost wistful look in the golden bird’s eyes. Sometimes she thought he might even be on the brink of singing. If only that would happen, Alicia thought, she’d be the happiest camper at Camp Princess.

Chapter 11

THE PRINCESS PARLOR

The next morning there was a cold drizzle falling outside the castle, which meant there would be no swimming or archery or falconry. After needlepoint the three princesses decided to go to the Princess Parlor, where the campers often gathered on rainy days to play checkers, practice with their songbirds, drink cocoa, and toast marshmallows.

“Maybe the smell of cocoa will loosen up your bird’s vocal cords,” Kristen said hopefully as they entered the pink and silver parlor. Alicia was carrying her weeb in its cage. She set the cage on a stand and stood hopelessly as she listened to another bird sing an aria, a song from an opera.

“Still no luck, Princess Alicia?” Princess Eloise looked up from the chess game she was playing with Princess Myrella. Princess Eloise was as pretty as she was kind. Her auburn hair fell in cascades of ringlets to her shoulders. Her eyes were a rich, deep brown, and dimples flashed in her cheeks when she smiled.

“No luck,” replied Alicia. “And I had a consultation with Princess Roseanna. But nothing seems to work.” What I need is a wizard like Merlin, she thought, not for the first time. Merlin’s magic would make the weeb sing.

“You know, Alicia, my very first session here my songbird sang, but it had a hideous voice. I think I might have preferred if she hadn’t sung,” Eloise said with a smile.

How did Princess Eloise always seem to know exactly the right thing to say? Alicia was so glad that she was on the Purple team too.

“Come over to the piano. Let me play some scales for the bird,” said Gundersnap. But even with music, the bird did not sing. Alicia looked at her weeb sadly. She felt like she was going to cry.

When Gundersnap saw this, she stopped playing and jumped up.
“Vrachtun!”
The word fired from her mouth like a bullet from a musket. Her eyes narrowed as she looked at Alicia’s bird. “Enough of this, you lazy veeb. Sing! I command you to sing for your mistress!”

The bird blinked, turned in its cage, and dropped a splat of white.

“That does it.” Gundersnap opened the cage door and reached in.

“What are you doing, Gundersnap?” Princess Eloise cried out.

“Don’t vorry.” Gundersnap held the bird upside down and began to shake it like a saltshaker. “Sing! Sing!”

Other princesses dropped their marshmallow sticks in the fire and gathered around in dismay.

“Stop it!” Alicia cried. “You’ll kill him.”

“Nonsense,” snapped Gundersnap. “My mother always shook us like this when we were little and misbehaving. It shakes out the nonsense.
Nicht nocklepop,
eh, bird?”

“Please stop, Gundersnap. I can’t bear it,” Alicia cried.

Gundersnap stopped, surprised. She shrugged, then turned the bird right side up and returned it to the cage. “I only vanted to help,” she said softly.

Princess Eloise looked at Alicia with great sympathy and said, “This happens sometimes, especially with male weebs.”

“But I feel so bad, Princess Eloise. I know that this contest counts for a lot. The Purple team needs all the good songbirds it can get. I know it’s been a long time since we’ve won the Color Wars.”

“That it has been!” said a princess named Lana, who was a Crimson.

But Princess Kinna said, “You know, I’ve heard that if you go out on a snowy and moonlit night and find a female weeb, that will make a male weeb sing.”

“Really?” Alicia asked. Could she do that? At night? Would that really make him sing? She couldn’t bear to be the princess who was responsible for losing the most important contest of the Color Wars.

“There are no shortcuts with a weeb,” Princess Eloise said. “Just patience. Princess Kinna, those are just old tales.”

Princess Kinna shrugged and went to sit by the fire.

It’s so embarrassing, Alicia thought, being the only princess with a nonfunctioning songbird! And to think Gundersnap’s bird not only knows how to sing but to march as well. Born to rule, that girl!

A few Crimson princesses who were sitting by the fireplace began to giggle and steal glances at Alicia as she stood with her stubborn bird. Kinna exploded out of the armchair. The one hundred and forty-eight braids that were laced with strings of diamonds trembled as she spoke a rather fierce-sounding language to the snickering girls. Even though the princesses did not understand what she was saying, they looked taken aback by her outburst.

“All right,” Kinna said calmly, “I see my words need no translation. As captain of the Purples, I remind you that I have the right to report you for poor sportsmanship and unprincesslike behavior in the face of competition. This would result in demerits for your total team score.” Her black eyes glistened like river stones.

There were no more snickers about Alicia and her bird.

Chapter 12

A RUSTLING IN THE NIGHT

More than a week had passed since Alicia caught her bird, and still it remained fiercely silent. There were only a few days left before the songbird contest. The motto that the Queen Mum had proclaimed kept ringing in Alicia’s ears: “If one can teach a songbird to sing beautifully, one can lead a nation. Remember, Princesses, you were born to rule.” Alicia pictured herself on the island she was supposed to rule—not on a throne, but in an ice-cream wagon, selling snow cones, or worse! If only the stubborn weeb would cooperate and sing.

She heard a knock on her chamber door. “Come in,” she called.

It was Kristen.

“I’ve come to help. Look at this.” She held up a funny little whistle. “It’s a pitch pipe.”

“What does it do?” Alicia asked.

“Maybe it will help your bird find his right tone. You know, his key. We can play the do-re-mi thing,” Kristen said.

“Oh, I’m so sick of the whole do-re-mi thing,” Alicia said with a sigh.

Just then Gundersnap and Myrella came in.

Gundersnap carried a small vial.

“What do you have there, Gunny?” Kristen asked.

“Honey! There is a saying you can catch more bees with honey than with vinegar.”

“But he’s not a bee, Gundersnap. He’s a bird,” Alicia said mournfully.

“This is a desperate situation, is what it is. Come on, let’s try it,” Kristen said.

“Come on, do try,” Myrella urged.

“Has being sweet worked for you, Myrella, with those awful turretmates?” Alicia asked.

“Not really, but then again, they were born sour.”

Gundersnap walked over and put two drops in the weeb’s cup with an eyedropper.

“This doesn’t sound like a remedy your mother the empress tried with you, Gundersnap,” Alicia said.

“
Nachtung
, never. No. She dosed us with vinegar once a month. She said it made us strong.”

Alicia and Kristen exchanged looks. It was their fervent hope that they would never have to meet Maria Theresa, Empress of All the Slobodks.

The princesses waited. The honey did nothing. The bird remained silent.

Luckily there were other activities besides songbird training in the days to come. Alicia loved jewelry design and making lanyards with semiprecious stones. And in upcoming sessions, there were going to be campfires and sleep-outs by the lake, the Purple team in their purple silk tents, the Crimson team in crimson silk tents. There would be more canoeing, which Alicia was becoming quite good at, and sailing. Alicia was also very skilled at falconry, which was the sport of hunting with birds. Teaching songbirds to sing was more difficult than teaching falcons to do double air flips!

Alicia, Kristen, and Gundersnap had just returned to their chambers from the archery field. Gundersnap was stomping around, singing a popular Slobodkonian marching tune. Her bird was chirping along quite nicely. Kristen had managed to teach hers a sea shanty. And Alicia once again tried to get her stubborn little weeb to sing the scales. Still nothing.

“I don’t think that I have a bit of talent for this, Lady Merry. It took me forever even to catch this bird. I have a learning disability. I am songbird challenged.”

“Nonsense, Your Highness,” replied Lady Merry. “I shan’t hear of it. The only thing you lack is patience. Give it time.”

After dinner there was a knock on the turret door.

“Yes,” trilled Lady Merry. “State your business. The hour is late.”

“A package has arrived for Princess Alicia.”

“Oh, my package!” Alicia exclaimed. “At last!”

A few minutes later, Alicia opened her box in the privacy of her bedchamber. There was a note from her father.

Dearest Alicia,

I hope you are finding camp fun as well as a challenging experience. I know that you are up to any challenge. For you are my brave Alicia, and in your heart you are no puffball princess.

Love and Kisses,
Pop

I hope I’m brave, she thought. “Oh, I miss them so much!” Alicia whispered, picking up the silver-fox muff and rubbing it against her cheek. She even put on the earmuffs, though it was summer outside. Then she got up and peered into the cage at the difficult bird. “Perhaps tomorrow you shall sing?” But the bird only looked back as if to say, “Perhaps not!” Alicia sighed.

Well, she thought, she might as well not waste time worrying. She turned to
Love Letters of a Forgotten Princess
. As she picked up the book, she looked at the bird. She had been right. His gaze did soften whenever she opened the book. Cautiously she stepped toward the cage, still holding the book open but pressed to her chest. There was a sudden mad fluttering as the bird hurled itself against the wire. Alicia gave a little shriek. A golden feather floated down toward the floor. She stooped to pick it up, and when she rose up again the little bird cocked his head and looked at her. There was intelligence in his eyes that made Alicia feel he was trying to tell her something.

Suddenly Alicia understood. “I must let you out, mustn’t I?” she whispered. Somehow she knew that the bird would not fly away. When she opened the door of the cage, the bird flew directly to her bedpost and perched there, seeming to wait for Alicia to begin reading.

She had left the cage door open so he could return whenever he wanted. But he stayed where he was. He seemed in fact to be reading over her shoulder. When she grew very sleepy, she tucked the golden feather between the pages to mark her place. As she drifted off, she felt something rustle in one corner of her chamber. Did the room grow cold? Did she hear the songbird finally trill in the night? Was it words she had heard, the muffled voices of a man and a woman? Or were words from the book lacing through her dreams?

“For heaven’s sake, Your Highness, what’s your bird doing out of the cage?” Gilly said as she entered the chamber with Alicia’s breakfast tray.

“Oh, my goodness.” Alicia yawned sleepily. “He’s still there.” She rolled over and looked up at the bedpost, where the weeb was perched. He gave her an interested but not unfriendly look. All this time she had been waiting for him to sing. But now Alicia had the strangest feeling that the weeb was actually waiting for her to do something.

“What?” she said aloud. The bird opened his beak this time, very wide, but no sound came out.

“Are you talking to me, milady?” Gilly turned from ironing the tea gowns.

“Oh, no, Gilly. No, just…nothing.”

Gilly gave Alicia a close look. “Well, the weather looks good, milady. It will be falconry this morning, then canoeing.”

“Oh, how nice.”

“You’ll be using your special falconry glove, I take it. Quite the envy of the other campers.”