Bound (16 page)

Ryke nodded silently and I inched closer to him.

“Does that make sense?” I asked. “Did you ever feel that way after Maggie died? Like you just couldn’t go back there again?”

“Yeah, I went through that. The first six months I was either angry or numb. Then I had a lot of random sex.” His brows furrowed like he was thinking about something. “Did you stop that kiss because you didn’t like it, or because you did?”

I smiled as our eyes met. “You know the answer to that. You’re the panty-dropping Jason Ryker. Of course I liked it.”

“I haven’t thought about any panties but yours since we met.”

“You’ve thought about my panties?” I arched a brow at him. “That’s kind of pervy.”

He shrugged and grinned
at me. “I’ve thought about them a lot. I especially like it when you wear those tight black pants and I can see the outline of your panties on your ass.”

I glanced down at my black yoga pants and my cheeks warmed.
How did this guy manage to make me feel sexy just by looking at me? His words were like foreplay, whether he touched me or not.

Quinn had gone for it as soon as we’d walk into his apartment or mine. A grin, and then his lips would be on mine. But Ryke was building my appetite for him in a way that was enticing and
agonizing at the same time.

He opened his mouth to say something and we both turned from the sound of the back door
opening. Mom and Dale were home. Dammit.

“Hello!” Mom called loudly. Ryke and I smiled at each other.

“Hi!” I called back.

“I better go,” Ryke said, getting up from the couch.

“Hey,” I said on an impulse. “I’m going camping with some high school friends next weekend. We meet at this campground in Wisconsin every year at the end of summer. It’s just rafting and fishing and drinking, nothing exciting. Anyway, if you want to go . . . I mean, if you aren’t busy—”

“Yeah, sounds good
,” he said.

He said goodnight to Mom and Dale and then to me, and as he walked out to his Jeep, his words still ran throu
gh my head. Yeah, an entire weekend with Ryke sounded very good.

***

Ryke

It was good to be skating again. I hadn’t done any in the off-season, and I’d missed the rhythm of it. Skating drills in the chill of our arena gave me that eager pre-season itch. I loved hockey bone-deep. The smells of sweat-stained leather gloves and stale popcorn made me feel at home, no matter where I was.

“Pass it, asshole!” Luke gro
wled at me. I looked over and eased the puck his way with my stick.

I’d been distracted thinking about Kate. When she’d reached for my mug after we finished our coffee this morning, our hands had touched, and the way she’d looked at me . . .

Kiss me, Ryke.
I knew it was what she was saying. Fucking knew it as sure as I knew anything. The fluttering eyelashes and parted lips said it loud and clear.

But I’d backed away. She didn’t really want it, I knew. Or she did, but didn’t. Fuck if I could even keep it straight anymore. Not touching her was nearly impossible. I
often had to put my hands in my pockets to avoid it.

“You’re thinking about
Kate again,” Luke said when we stopped for a water break, our skates spraying snow onto the rink wall. I shook my head and glared at him.

“Fuck you.”

“What? Fuck her and be done with it, man. Or fuck someone else to get her off your mind.”

“I’m not obsessed with her, you prick,” I said, still panting from the exerting skate. “Don’t try to read my mind.”

Victor Stein slid to a stop next to us. “What’s up, big boy?” I said, grinning. Victor was a 6’6” defender who was 240 pounds of solid muscle.

“Hey Vic,” Luke called. “When Ryke’s distracted, who’s he thinking about?”

“That hot blonde he calls his ‘assistant’,” Victor said, smirking as he air quoted.

“I’m thinking about Dawn, asshole,”
I said. Hearing his wife’s name wiped the smile off his face. “God, I love the way she screams my name. Does she let you pound her ass, or is that just me?”

He shoved my shoulder and I shoved back, sending him sliding backwards a couple feet. He was heading back for me when Coach Renner’s bark stopped him.

“Ladies, save it for a game! Get your asses back to work!”

“You better watch it,” Victor mumbled toward me.

I grinned and skated away. My excitement today wasn’t just from the familiar feel of my skate blades gliding over the ice. I’d called a sporting goods store on the way to the rink this morning and asked them to deliver camping supplies to my apartment. I was spending the entire upcoming weekend with Kate, and at night, we’d be alone in a tent.

If I could help her let go of her fears, it could be the end of the dry spell for both of us. Hers was longer than mine, but three plus months was a hell of a long time for me. Since I’d met her, it wasn’t just sex I wanted anymore. It was
Kate. Vulnerable, sweet, sexy little Kate, who was making me wonder if maybe there was such a thing as a second chance.

Chapter 8

Kate

I shook my head as Ryke bent down to rearrange items in the back of the Mustang. It was packed tight with what looked like enough supplies for a month-long excursion.

“That’s a lot
of beer,” I said, counting four cases stacked up on the seat.

“With so many of us,
it’s not that much.” His voice was muffled as he rearranged things to make room for my bag.

“Yeah, but everyone brings their own, and you packed four bottles of hard liquor in the back.”

“I didn’t know what you like. Pass me your bag.”

Handing
over my tattered purple backpack, I smiled. Ryke had put a lot of effort into buying and packing all this stuff. It was a role reversal for us, since usually I was the one planning and doing the legwork.

“Hey, thanks for doing this,” I said.

He backed out of the car and shut the door, grinning victoriously and wiping a hand across his forehead. “I wanted to. We both need to get away. My preseason games start soon and then I’ll be on the road a lot.”

“Yeah, it’ll be nice to get away,” I said, sighing as I scrolled through my cell phones messages and deleted two voicemails from Quinn I’d never even listened to.

I jumped into the car, eager to leave. The moment Ryke pulled out of the parking garage, I felt a little lighter. I hoped all my worries would remain in Chicago so I could catch more than a passing glimpse of the happy, carefree Kate I’d been before.

“Sports radio ok
ay?” Ryke asked, pushing a button on the console. I murmured my okay and leaned back to watch our departure from the congested city. The long string of tightly packed cars slowly stretched out until we were winding our way through tree-lined country roads.

I hadn’t seen endless grassy fields in so long.
The canvas of bright green landscape and endless blue sky cleansed away my tension. Ryke and I talked about our grade school days for nearly the whole ride. He’d been playing hockey since before kindergarten, so it was infused into all of his best memories and friendships.

“No matter what team I’m on, I’ll always be a Firebird,” he said, his eyes softening as he talked about the team he’d played for in high school. “Those guys mean a lot to me. My old teammate Yuri’s on the Montreal team now. We always get together after our games.”

“What does a firebird look like?” I asked, cocking an eyebrow.

“Badass. I’ll
show you one if you want.” He glanced at a road sign as we neared the campground.

“The parking lot’
s just a couple miles away,” I said. “And how will you show me a firebird?”

“I’
ve got one on my hip. My old team’s logo.”

My lips parted as I remembered the black tips snaking out above his waistband in the underwear ad. “Oh. A tattoo?”

“Yep. It’s a bird with flames around it.”

“Did it hurt?”

“Not really.” He shrugged. “You get used to it as you sit there.”

“Do you have any others?”

“Just one.” He stared out the windshield at the narrowing dirt road. “On my left shoulder blade. It’s a rose with vines around the letter H.”

His eyes had dar
kened a little and I could tell this was a bad subject. Former girlfriend, maybe? The silence hung, and I was trying to think of a subject change when he glanced at me.

“It’s for my sister Hannah. She died of leukemia when she was four.”

“Oh, Ryke. God, I’m sorry.”

He sighed softly
. “I was nine when it happened. Her name was Hannah Rose, that’s why I have a rose.”

A flicker of sadness passed over his face, and I realized I’d never seen this side of Ryke. The thought of his family going through that was more than I could stand to think about.

“Why did you have the tattoo put on your back?” I asked. “Is it because it’s so personal and you don’t want the whole world to see it?”

He smiled tightly. “There is a reason, but it sounds cheesy.”

“What could possibly be cheesy about that?”

“I started wanting that tattoo when I was 14. My parents wouldn’t let me get one when I was that young. I never forgot about it, though, and I went and got it on my eighteenth birthday. I wanted it back there,
where I can’t see it, to remind me that . . .” He sighed and rubbed his jaw. “Sometimes even though you can’t see someone, they’re always with you.”

And that was it. As soon as I heard those words I knew this was a man I could fall deeply in love with. If I let go of the tight hold I had on my heart, he would own it.
I wished we could turn around and go somewhere else; spend this weekend completely alone.

He pulled into a parking spot next to my friends Josh and Lee. The sight of Lee’s shaggy blond hair made me smile. He hadn’t changed since high school.

“Kate!” Lee said, heading my way with his arms open as I stepped out of the car. Josh was admiring Ryke’s car.

“Hey,” I said, squeezing Lee tightly.

“Man, you look familiar,” Josh was saying to Ryke as they shook hands.

“This is Ryke,” I said.

“Ryker!” Josh said, pointing at him. “You play hockey?”

“Yeah,” Ryke said. I went to stand by his side. Hearing about his sister made me want to wrap my arms around him, but I set
tled for feeling his warmth next to me.

“Everyone else is at the camping spot,” Lee said. “You guys want help carrying your stuff?”

“Yeah,” I said, turning toward the car. Would my friends think Ryke and I were a couple? And if they did, would I correct them?

***

Maddie and Allie were twins with glossy dark brown waves and bright blue eyes. We’d run cross-country together, and I’d spent many miles behind one or the other admiring their long, perfect legs.

They stood in a cluster with Michelle, who was a year younger than us
but had married our friend Deacon, and Lexi, who had dropped out of college to open her own salon. I’d heard it was doing well.

“Hey, girls!” I said, grinning as I ap
proached. There was something reassuring about seeing friends I’d known since childhood. Ryke had been mobbed by my guy friends and was talking hockey with them while they all unpacked camping equipment.

Glancing up at me,
Maddie’s eyes widened and everyone got quiet. I stopped walking, an ominous feeling settling over me.

“Hey, Kate,” Maddie said. I saw Lexi shoving something in her purse and I wrinkled my face in confusion. No
one wanted to look at me. I was like an awkward high schooler approaching the cool kids and feeling their rejection.

“Am I interrupting?” I said. “I didn’t realize . . .”

“No!” Lexi reached for me with a hug. “It’s so good to see you, Kate.”

“Will you guys just tell me what’s going on? Were you talking about me?” My heart raced as I wondered what they could’ve been saying. What’s she doing with Jason Ryker? Did you hear she got pregnant and lost her baby? This annual gathering was usually the only time I saw these friends, but surely that was old news by now.

“Uh . . .” Lexi shuffled her feel and avoided my gaze. “I was . . . showing them pictures of my son.”

I wobbled a little,
like the ground was shifting beneath me. “Your son? Lexi! I didn’t even know you were pregnant!”

Smile, Kate. Smile. Be happy. Come on.

But I couldn’t. Not because I wasn’t happy, but because I was shocked.

“I’m sorry,” Lexi said softly. “I didn’t mean to leave you out, it’s just . . . I don’t want to make you feel bad. I got pregnant the same time you did,
but you didn’t know, and . . .”

“Oh.”
I wanted to be alone with my tears, but I couldn’t. For now, I had to smile and pretend. “Lex, that’s great. I’m happy for you. Please don’t feel weird about it. We’re friends, and I’m still happy for you.”