Bound by Love's Gravity (27 page)

Deke heard Adam’s sharp intake of breath. He saw his partner’s perceptive eyes drift toward him. “You know you love her. Don’t you? You finally realized it.”

“No,” he replied without reservation. “I don’t.” He didn’t love her. This wasn’t love. It was so much more.

* * * *

Outside of Deke’s office, a shell-shocked Sarah stood by a red-faced Sam who swore softly. “He doesn’t mean that,” her friend whispered fiercely. “You know he doesn’t.”

But she didn’t know that, not anymore. After last night and this morning, she’d assumed everything would fall into place. She’d imagined this fantasy world where Deke would confess his love for her then the three of them would get married and have two-point-five children and a dog. Of course, she would have proudly worn their collar and been the perfect wife for them.

Clearly, her dreams had been childish. Even worse, they were premature and completely wrong. He didn’t love her. If he didn’t love her now, he probably never would.

Without realizing what she was doing, she backed away from the doorframe, slowly at first but faster and faster as she got further away. Unable to take anymore and unwilling to listen to another word, she spun on her heel and ran.

As Sarah sprinted down the steps then through the front doors of The Edge, she was cursing up a blue streak. For someone who never swore, she realized she was familiar with a lot of dirty words. Behind her, Sam hollered for her to wait on him, but she didn’t listen. She kept going—and going—until she stood by her car in the parking lot across from the club, bent over with her hands on her knees, sucking in air in long, drawn-out breaths.

Why? How could I have been so wrong? I knew he loved me. I knew it. But, God, he didn’t. He doesn’t.

Sarah felt sick, her stomach somersaulting. And for once, she thought vomiting might not be so bad after all. That would definitely take her mind off the ache in her chest. Right now, she’d prefer anything to the crushing pain she felt.

“I have to go,” she muttered to herself as she reached for her purse, only to realize it wasn’t there. “No, no, no. I’ve got to get away from here.”
I’ve got to get away from them.

Panting, Sam reached her. “Sarah, don’t fly off the handle. You probably misunderstood.” He touched her arm, the gentle gesture comforting, and surprisingly, she didn’t flinch or pull away. “He.
Loves
. You.”

“Can we not talk about it?” she asked, valiantly fighting the tears threatening to spill. “I just…I just need to go home.”

Sam shook his head. “Oh, no you don’t, sweetheart. You’re not fit to drive anywhere.”

“Sure I am.”

“No, you aren’t.” Cupping her face, he wiped a single tear off her cheek then showed the moisture to her pointedly. “See. You need to let me take you home.”

A huge part of her wanted to deny him. But the other part didn’t mind. She didn’t want to be alone, and she did like Sam. She was comfortable with him, so going with him made sense.

Before she thought better of it, she nodded and agreed. “Okay.”

“Where are your keys?”

Sarah reached into her pocket, hoping she’d stuck her key in there. When she found nothing again, she groaned. “I left them inside.”

Equally frustrated and heartbroken, another tear fell from Sarah’s eyes then another and another. Before she could stop them, tears rained down her face. She tried to wipe them away, but there were just too many, and she gave up.

“Where?”

“They’re in the coat check.” She hiccupped. “I forgot my purse in there last night.” She hiccupped again. “I–I–I was in a hurry.”

Sam nodded. “Don’t worry. I’ll get them,” he murmured as he whirled around and sprinted into the club. A couple minutes later, he emerged, carrying her keys in his mouth while tapping away on his cell phone’s keyboard. Closing in on her, he shut his phone and slid it into his pocket.

“Who were you texting?” she asked suspiciously, inwardly praying it wasn’t Deke or Adam. Yet at the same time, hoping it was.

Sam confirmed her best and worst suspicions. “I wanted to let Deke and Adam know you’re okay.”

“Traitor.”

“Sorry, sweetheart. I want to keep my balls attached to my body.” Putting his hand on her back, he guided her into the passenger side of her car. “If it makes you feel better, I didn’t send the message to your Doms.” He smirked. “I sent it to Ansley.”

Sarah choked. “Seriously?”

“Seriously,” he replied with a laugh. “It’ll take her a while to tell them. By then, we’ll have a head start.”

“Thank you,” she muttered as she sat down into the front seat and buckled up.

Closing the door, Sam jogged around to the driver side. When he ducked into the interior, he murmured, “You’re welcome.” And in a jiffy, he started the car and got on the road, heading away from the club.

Deke watched Adam narrow his eyes. “Liar,” he snarled, clenching his fists as though he were going to start a brawl in the middle of Deke’s immaculate office. “You’re a fucking liar.”

“I’m not lying. I don’t love her.” He paused to work up his courage before making the emotional declaration that would forever alter his life. Once he finished telling Adam these things, his relationship with Sarah was sealed.

Finally ready, Deke sighed. “Love is weak compared to what Sarah makes me feel. She’s everything to me—
everything
. Do you know how scared that makes me? Do you have a clue how bad that makes me feel?”

Pausing, Deke gulped, preparing to confess the hardest part. “I love you, Adam. I never thought I could love someone as much as you. But I do. And I feel like a bastard for that. I feel like I’m cheating on you. It’s fucked up. I know.”

A slow smile spread over Adam’s face. “Deke, you’re not cheating on me. I want you to love her like you love me. I want her to love you as equally as she does me. She’s ours. I don’t want the three of us to be uneven in this relationship. We’ve been there before, and it nearly destroyed us.”

Knowing exactly who Adam was referring to, Deke’s face flushed “I didn’t love Megan,” he admitted. “I wanted to, but…”

“She wasn’t the one,” Adam finished for him. “Neither of us loved her, and she didn’t love us. If she hadn’t killed herself, we would have ended things eventually.”

Grateful, Deke squeezed the side of Adam’s neck. “You’re right. I just wished I had seen that sooner. If I had, we would have been with Sarah before now.”

Adam nodded. “I know.”

“I kept you away from her because I knew this would happen.”

“I know.”

Frowning, Deke shook his head. “No, you don’t. I made sure that you couldn’t meet her.” Deke had. He’d always been careful, making sure that the two of them were never in the same town together. It had been hard. But a desperate man would do desperate things.

Again, Adam said, “I knew, Deke. You’re a smart man, but so am I.”

Deke chuckled.

“The only thing I don’t get is why you changed your mind before Gray, Cade, and Jaycee’s wedding?”

Okay, one last confession—the ultimate admission. “When I visited Serenity a couple of years ago, I saw Sarah, and I wanted her. No, I craved her. I would have killed to have her.” He frowned, recalling the day he’d seen her in Tranquility Park gardening with the sweetest, most enchanting smile he’d ever encountered. “It took everything in me to walk away from her, to leave her behind, without a word. All I could think about was picking her up and hauling her back here where you were. But I couldn’t do that, not then.”

“Why?”

“It wasn’t the honorable thing to do. I was committed to you, and we swore after Megan that we’d never share a woman again.”

Adam pressed a lingering kiss to Deke’s lips. “I know we did. But things change.”

“Yes, they do. That’s why I made sure you met her.”

Adam laughed. “And thank you for that. She’s…everything.”

Grinning at Adam’s word choice, Deke leaned forward and nipped his partner’s lower lip. “So are you.”

* * * *

Riding in the passenger-side seat while Sam drove to her apartment, Sarah didn’t speak. Neither did Sam. They passed the time in companionable silence, and Sarah was grateful. She didn’t need or want to make small talk. And she would rather eat snails than discuss Deke or Adam right now. So she let the silence stretch on—and on—until the car sputtered. “What was that?”

“Uhh, I have no idea,” Sam answered. “As good as I am with my hands, I don’t do cars. That’s Brett’s thing.”

The car sputtered a second time.

“Let’s pull this baby over,” Sam mumbled, his concern frank in his tone. “Then we’ll call for help.”

As soon as Sam got halfway out of the road, the car stuttered then died. He attempted to turn the engine over, but it didn’t work. Five tries later, it was fairly obvious the car was a goner.

“Oh no.” She groaned, shaking her head in distress. “No, no, no.”

Patting her knee, he smiled reassuringly. “I’ll get out and see if something obvious is going on. If not, I’ll call someone. Okay, sweetheart?”

She nodded but couldn’t speak. This day was rapidly turning into a disaster. Couldn’t she go to bed and start over again? That sounded like the best idea ever. Not that life worked that way, but a girl could dream.
Dang it.

Swiftly, Sam popped the hood then hopped out of the car. He gave her a wave before disappearing underneath the hood.

Waiting for the verdict, Sarah did the unthinkable. She contemplated giving in and calling Deke or Adam or Deke
and
Adam. Despite her desperation to avoid them, she needed them there. They would fix the car, and they would repair her messy emotions.

Sarah growled. She didn’t need them to rescue her. Not if they didn’t love her. No, not if
Deke
didn’t love her. She knew Adam did. But she couldn’t exactly call him because she couldn’t call Deke.

“Son of a gorilla’s butt,” she grumbled, crossing her arms and leaning her head back against the headrest. “This stinks.”

“Yes it does,” Sam muttered as he suddenly appeared next to the open door. “I think I’m going to have to call”—he came to an abrupt halt, cocking his head to the side and pointing out the back windshield—“There’s a SUV coming. Let me see if they’ll help.”

An odd sense of anxiety settled in her body. Her heart accelerated, and she wanted to say
no.
But what could she do? Unless the car drove by them, they were stuck here. Besides, they weren’t in a slasher film or anything. There weren’t any serial killers hitchhiking through Kansas. Right? She was just being silly.

“Okay,” she finally muttered.

“Stay here,” he ordered.

And she did.

As luck would have it, the SUV did stop in front of them—where she couldn’t see the driver or Sam because the hood blocked her view. When several minutes ticked by, and her friend didn’t return, she grew restless. So she decided to get out of the car to see if she could do anything to help.

“Sam, can I help you?” she called out as she stepped into the nippy Kansas morning.

“N–n–no,” he stuttered. “I’m fine. Get back in the car, Sarah.
Now.
”

Sarah had never heard Sam sound like that, a cross between pissed and panicked. Something was obviously wrong. Straightening up, she stalked around the front of the car. She was ready for anything or anyone. At least, she thought she was—until she spotted the man wielding the knife.
Gavin.

Immediately, Sarah’s legs wobbled and she screamed bloody murder.

“Hello, Sarah. Have you missed me?”

Like a mouse misses a snake.
Stunned, she couldn’t respond to him. She stood rooted to the ground, struggling to breathe, as she stared at Gavin helplessly.

Even though it had been a year since she’d seen her ex-boyfriend, he hadn’t really changed. Still ridiculously tall and well-built, Gavin wore clothes that screamed money. His coffee-colored hair was styled in the same trendy way, and his sapphire eyes shone as brilliantly as they always had. His flawless white teeth sparkled when he smiled in the way only he could—charming but conceited, shallow and superficial yet manipulative and malignant.

How could one person be so many things at once? And how in the world had she been naive enough to miss the evil simmering underneath the charismatic persona? How had he hidden the monster inside him?
Because the Devil doesn’t always wear red and breathe fire. Sometimes he masquerades in Gucci crocodile loafers and spews pretty lies like a narcissistic sociopath with a hidden agenda.

“Get in the car, Sarah,” Sam instructed. “This has nothing to do with you.”

That was where her friend was wrong. This had everything to do with her. Gavin was here—for her—which meant Sam was going to get hurt if she didn’t do something. Thinking quickly, she searched for some way to save him. When nothing came to mind, a load of adrenaline poured into her veins, and she snapped, her temper exploding all at once.

Storming straight for Gavin, she barked, “Get the fuck away from him.” She closed in on her ex, who merely smiled at her arrogantly. “You’re here for me. Take me and leave Sam alone.”