Bound to Break: Men of Honor, Book 6 (8 page)

Dash had dual citizenship—his mom was from the States, dad born and bred in South Africa. Up until Emme went to college, the family had spent part of every year in the States and Dash had gone to college there. He’d been into mixed martial arts. Semi-pro boxing. Knew how to fire weapons. Add the photography to that, and as his future supervisor would tell him on that day, “You’re the perfect storm. Everything we look for in an agent.”

It happened fast after that. He didn’t finish college. Not formally, anyway. His family thought he dropped out of school because he’d gotten the photography job of a lifetime, his big break. And that was partially true.

So he’d built his life from there on out on partial truths.

“If this hadn’t happened, when were you going to tell me?” Emme finally asked.

“Never, if I could help it.”

She went to walk away and he said, “I know you’re pissed, but I never wanted you to have to live the life I did.”

“That wasn’t your choice to make. You made it for all of us.”

“Because my job dictates that.”

There wasn’t going to be a day that went by where Em wouldn’t be looking over her shoulder. That built-in superstition would haunt her. Would affect the rest of her life.

“When will we know if we’re out of danger?”

He didn’t tell her that he’d been given the option to relocate them, that if it were solely up to him, he’d pack his family up and get them the hell out of there.

But they’d never leave. And he wouldn’t force that. He would, however, hire guards that would double as bouncers, put in extra security and the like, in addition to the CIA team that would be guarding his family until this Lucky-slash-Josh situation was figured out.

And then he’d head to Virginia and figure out what the hell Josh was up to.

“You slept with him,” Emme said now. “Was that part of the job?”

How could he tell her the answer to that was both yes and no? The most honest answer tumbled out of his mouth before he could stop it. “I like him.”

Emme leaned against the door. “Like as in, want a relationship? Are those allowed in your job?”

He snorted. “They’re not encouraged, and he’s the first guy I’ve liked in a long time.”

“And he might be here to hurt us.”

He shrugged.

“You consider yourself a good judge of character, right, Dash? Do you think you could fall for someone who might hurt us?”

“They say love’s blind, right?”

“Ah, Dash.” She went and hugged him. “He’s perfect for you.”

“That’s why you let him stay?”

“We let him stay because we think he’s a good person. You won’t get me to believe otherwise. I mean, he’s had a million chances to hurt us. It’s not like he asked questions about you. He never went in your room in the apartment. He refused. He was the one who saved Dad’s life when he had the heart attack two years ago. He came to us broken, needing family, and he found it. We love him.” She sighed. “This is going to crush Mom and Dad.”

And it did. When his parents heard what happened—from Emme, of course—they were furious. At Dash. Probably because Emme added in the fact that he’d slept with Lucky, when he hadn’t actually confirmed that, and now they were like the morality police.

The disappointment on his father’s face was the hardest to bear, and it had nothing to do with what Dash had done to Lucky.

Everyone was upset that Dash hadn’t trusted them. What Dash didn’t bother to tell them was that this time he didn’t even trust himself.

Chapter Seven

Sawyer couldn’t sit still. A long run down the beach did shit to tamp down the tension that continued to rattle his body with every pounding step in the wet sand.

He ran until he couldn’t any longer, and since he’d had to run for his life on several occasions, that was a hell of a long time. But even though his body shut off, his mind refused to.

He imagined that’s what it must’ve been like for Rex in that prison, when he’d been captured. Imagined what it would be like to see someone you thought had died step in front of you.

Imagined how much things in his future could change because of this.

When he got back, he took a long, hot shower. His body had turned to mush but his mind would never let him sleep. He planned on settling in with several action-packed movies in the hopes they’d at least keep his mind entertained when the phone rang.

He’d figured it’d be Jace, who’d tried to get him to hang out with him and Clint again. But drinking hadn’t helped anything. Rex had warned Sawyer about the radio silence, but when he said, “Hey,” and Rex’s voice answered, “Did I wake you?” Sawyer fucking melted.

“I’ve been worried about you,” he admitted before he could stop himself.

“I’ve been worried about you,” Rex countered.

He couldn’t even ask Rex where he was. Realized that Rex might be on base and couldn’t tell him. “Have you been sleeping at all?”

“Always have trouble without you next to me. In case you hadn’t noticed, my sleep patterns have vastly improved with you in my bed.”

“I noticed,” he said quietly. Rex had to be someplace private if he was able to talk about things like that, so he breathed a little easier. Things were okay.

“Good. Because I assumed you did, but then I realized that I should probably stop assuming and start telling you.”

“Thanks.” Sawyer closed his eyes, said a silent prayer that he’d say the right thing. “Is Josh okay?”

“He’s alive. He’s okay.”

He let out a long breath. “Good.”

“He looks the same. Like time stood still for him. And he doesn’t remember anything. Not me or his time with the teams. Or anything before four years ago.”

Sawyer didn’t know what to say. Figured Rex just needed for him to listen but he couldn’t help but add, “I’m glad he has you there.”

There was a long pause. “You’re a special one, Sawyer.”

“Is—”

“I don’t want to talk about it anymore. Not right now. Things are strange and crazy, but I couldn’t sleep because I was thinking about you. No one else but you. This conversation’s about you from this point onward.”

Sawyer’s cock got hard at the tone and the implication of Rex’s words. He’d automatically headed to the bedroom, collapsed on the sheets that smelled like Rex.

Rex had asked him to stay here while he was gone, asked that Sawyer be here when he got back. Sawyer hadn’t had the heart to refuse and now was glad he hadn’t.

“Get yourself comfortable, baby,” Rex purred. “But first, grab the laptop. Want to see you.”

Sawyer smiled and grabbed for the MacBook Air on the night table. He turned on Skype and waited for it to load as he got naked.

Rex looked tired but his eyes were bright. Sawyer put a finger up to the computer as if to touch his face.

“This is nice,” Rex said. “Wanted to see your face when you came.”

“You’re coming too,” he replied and Rex snorted.

“Someone’s feeling his oats.”

“Damned straight.”

Sawyer lay on his side, lubed his cock and began to stroke it the way Rex told him to, first long and slow and then fast and hard until he was begging Rex to let him come.

“More than once,” Rex said. “Love to hear you beg.”

“I want you inside me. Fuck, if I think hard enough, I can feel your cock in my ass.”

“Jesus, Sawyer.” The bed on Rex’s side rustled and he knew, just by the sound of the man’s voice, that Rex was jerking off. “Want to bend you over the nearest couch. Or my desk. Wouldn’t care where you were or who was around when I did it. I’d hold you down, bite the back of your neck. Drive into you until you were yelling my name. Because I love it when you yell my name.”

“Yeah, I’d do that. Fucking take everything you gave me.”

Their relationship had started out with phone sex, because that had been the most non-threatening for Sawyer.

He still liked the memories it brought back, and the orgasm raced through him. Rex shouted softly as he came a minute later. But Sawyer couldn’t find that good, contented feeling he usually had when an orgasm abated.

Rex, of course, noticed. “Trouble staying still?”

“I am still.”

Rex frowned and Sawyer realized his foot was shaking, which in turn made his entire body shake. It was such a part of his constant need for motion that it rarely registered with him anymore. And it turned itself off in high-danger situations, like a survival switch. “I guess I just need to come again.”

“I won’t let you come unless you stop moving.”

“Guess I’m never coming then.” Frustrated, he let go of his cock.

“Want to tell me what’s going on? Besides the obvious?”

“It’s my mind, Rex. I’m comfortable. I’m relaxed. I just can’t shut my mind off,” he said.

“Talk to me, baby.”

“It’s not the time.”

“It’s always the time to tell me how you’re feeling. Please,” Rex added, and Sawyer blurted out, “I feel like we don’t know each other outside of work.”

“Work is us, Sawyer. Work does define us. It’s not a typical job.”

“You think because you see me at work that you know everything about me?”

“Not everything. But discovering’s a big part of the fun.”

Sawyer leaned back against the pillows. “That’s true.”

“So what don’t you know about me?”

“If I don’t know it, how do I know what I don’t know?” Sawyer asked, and Rex laughed. “Okay, start with the Dom stuff.”

“What about it?”

“I know you were really into it at one point. And then, not so much.”

“I was, before Josh. And then I went so far opposite of it and I felt lost. Until I found you, and then I found myself again. Does that make sense?”

“Yeah, it does.”

“I don’t want to be a full-time Dom with you, Sawyer. You’d hate that. But I do know how to calm you when you can’t calm yourself. I’ll show you that I can fix it, if you’ll let me.”

“How can you do that?”

“Next time I see you in person, I’ll show you.”

“And for now?”

“We’re back in that shower, the night you were watching me,” Rex started, and Sawyer’s entire body flooded with heat again. “I’m jacking myself off, and you think you’re safe. Hidden. You watch me come and then you go back to your bunk. You’re alone in there, because the rest of the guys are out on watch. You’re supposed to be getting shut-eye, so you lie down and close your eyes.”

Sawyer’s hand snaked around his cock, but he didn’t stroke himself for fear he’d come and end the story.

“I pull the covers off you, and you try to get up, but I’ve got surprise on my side. I tie you, facedown, to your bunk. Spread-eagled. And you’re begging me to let you go. But I won’t, not until you tell me to fuck you.”

“Fuck me,” Sawyer breathed without thinking.

“Good boy. Because if you didn’t agree, I told you I’d leave you there, just like this, for the other men to see. That’s not to say they won’t come in and find me fucking you though.”

A groan escaped. Sawyer loved these fantasies, because they were safe. Because Rex told him time and time again he had no interest in sharing him or risking his career like that.

But as a fantasy…hot as hell.

“I’m running a finger down your ass. I’m asking you if you’ve ever done this before. You tell me no. I tell you this is what you get when you spy on your CO.”

“Couldn’t help it. You looked so hot. You knew I was there the whole fucking time, too.” He hadn’t known at the time, but knowing it now made the whole thing that much sweeter to revisit.

“I’m going to eat your ass, Sawyer, because you love it and because you’re embarrassed at how much you love it still,” Rex said, his drawl deepening and yeah, that was true. Sawyer’s face flushed as soon as he said the words and he began to stroke his cock, his hips rocking back and forth as he imagined Rex’s tongue doing all those things that made Sawyer go completely fucking wild.

He came with a huge shudder, kept his eyes on Rex’s the entire time. Loved it that the man came immediately after he did.

“It’s probably the last time I can talk to you like this for a while.”

“Why’s that?”

“I’ve been talking to the JAG. There are questions for me and Nate and Uncle. It’s going to be fine, but we’re going to have to sort things out. No different than being sent on a mission,” Rex said quietly, and they both let the lie slide.

They fell asleep with only the computer screen between them. Sawyer woke up multiple times during the night, only to find Rex still there. Not sleeping, but each time, nodding to let Sawyer know he was still there.

He’s still there.

Chapter Eight

Lucky slept on and off for the last leg of the plane ride to Virginia and the naval base he’d been told he’d been a part of for years.

He didn’t even remember living in Virginia. Didn’t remember what state he’d been born in, grown up in. Didn’t know if anyone would truly believe that.

Dash does.