Burn: Outlaw Romance (Hotter Than Hell Book 3) (10 page)

My life has been one long, silent, scream.

Dax

I SHOULDN’T FUCKING CARE
. She’s no one to me, but I still replay everything she said. What kind of hell did she live through? Twenty plus years is a long time to plan vengeance and keep the torch burning. How can I not respect that? If I hadn’t killed the man who killed Savannah and my child, I would still want vengeance.

I walk into the front room, where the men are waiting. The only woman in the room is Red. She wisely keeps her eyes down. The men congregate in groups talking quietly. I march behind the bar and grab a beer out of the fridge, untwist the top, and take a healthy swig. I need another minute to gather my thoughts.

I rest the beer on top of the long, marred counter before looking over the room. “We eat and then the officers will meet at the table to discuss what we do with the woman.”

Bear is one of the only men standing. “You need to hold church for that? She should already be dead,” he grumbles.

I give him my full attention. “I’m not Fox. I don’t kill women without a very good fucking reason.”

He’s not intimated, which is what worries me about not acting decisively on this.

“She pointed a gun at you. She knows you killed Fox. Red says she’s his fucking kid even if it’s hard to believe. I say get it over with and let’s move on,” Bear says.

He’s a cold bastard and I wonder why he’s still here. Skull put in a good word for him or I’d be knocking him on his ass right now. He’s saying what several of them feel, I’m sure of it. I hold my temper and thankfully it’s AJ who settles things down.

He stands and faces off with Bear. “We’re a club. The officers vote for what’s best for the club. Our prez isn’t dictating, he’s acting responsibly. Have you fucking forgotten that Fox was a tyrant and did whatever the fuck he wanted whenever the fuck he wanted to?” He glances at me. “I agree with you. We hold church after eating because right now, I’m fucking starving.”

“Here, here,” Skull shouts and tips back his beer. Bear mutters under his breath but doesn’t say anything more. He grabs a chair and falls into it. The old chair squeaks under his weight. Bear’s around my age, packs close to the same muscle as I do, and carries a huge chip on his shoulder much like the woman in the small room. I heard he did time for beating a man to death. Given my own past, I can hardly judge. I’m keeping my eyes on him, though.

It twists my guts that I already know the way this vote will go. I’ll be the one to fucking pull the trigger too. I won’t leave this to Skull or Vampire. I’m now wearing the president’s patch and that patch comes with a price. I remove another beer and drink it down as quickly as the first.

The women made enough chili to feed a village. It’s halfway decent—burns fire through my intestines and has enough salt to raise my blood pressure significantly. Arizona red bottom chili at its best. Hell, I’m starving and willing to eat almost anything. At least this is slightly better than the TV dinners I’ve been living off. The clubhouse has never been known for its fine cuisine. Chips or bags of peanuts are the usual fare. It’s something else I plan to change. We need to be a family and that means we spend time together. Fox had monthly “bring your own everything” barbeques and that was the only “family time” as far as including old ladies was concerned. Besides the barbeques, Fox never wanted girlfriends or old ladies at the club or even on the property. Fridays and Saturdays were brother party nights when the whores earned their drugs.

One of my priorities is making room on the property for the single men. If the tied brothers want to move onto the property, they’re welcome to. The more the merrier. We need to make sure everyone is financially sound and doesn’t do something stupid that lands them back behind bars. I’ve taken over Fox’s room and that leaves two other available rooms plus the small room. We’ll save that one for unexpected visitors. If we didn’t need every penny to get a convenience store started, I’d tear down the clubhouse and build from the ground up. Aluminum siding on the outside and painting on the inside will need to do for the next year.

Years ago, this land was a motorhome park. It still has the hookups but they’re so old we need the electricity cleared by the county. Once that happens, we can build our own small city. It would solve so many problems.

There’s very little talk while we eat. The earlier camaraderie from working together outside is gone. The only bright spot is having the front yard of the clubhouse cleared. We’ll tackle the back yard in the next few weeks.

I hold back a groan at all the shit I need to do.

The chili sets heavy in my stomach when I stand and walk to the meeting room. I glance over my shoulder and the other board members rise and follow.

The room is about ten by fifteen with enough space for a large table and chairs. There are folding chairs stacked against the far wall and that’s it. The room has a ceiling fan and one small boarded window, so the fan mostly circulates the heat.

I walk to the head of the table and pull out
the
chair. Even though I fucking hated Fox, it’s strange to take his seat. I wasn’t part of the inner sanctum and rarely entered this room. I knew the rule, though—no one sat here but Fox. I pick up the old wooden gavel lying on the table and run my hand over the smooth handle. I glance up and see the brothers watching me.

“Fucking weird,” I say aloud. A second later, I rap the wood sharply on the table.

Church is in session.

Skull, Vampire, Johns, and AJ wait for me to begin. “Honestly, this isn’t what I expected on day two as president.” I scratch my chin and continue. “We have a tough decision and nothing about it makes me fucking happy.”

Skull grunts and AJ starts to speak but then decides against it.

I look at him and then share my gaze with each of them. “At this table we speak our minds. I’m not Fox, and if this club goes down, it will be on us as a group. It doesn’t matter if we agree or disagree in this room. Majority vote carries and when we leave this room, we back it up.” I direct my gaze to AJ. “Say what the hell you need to say.”

He clears his throat before speaking. “Red’s a problem too and it seems you’re overlooking it. Her fuck up could send us back to prison. We don’t know who else knows what went down yesterday. Killin’ a woman ain’t my thing. That said… both of them are a danger to this club.”

My hands are flat on the table and I fight balling them into fists. I knew Red would be a problem. I also know AJ is right in everything he says. “Pauline is a danger to us too and she walked away.” I’m hoping this puts things into perspective. “The men who left the club yesterday walked out with all of our secrets. I’m not stupid and I know we haven’t seen the last of them.”

“What did Red say?” Vampire asks.

I turn to Vamp. “Not much. I didn’t really give her a chance to explain before I punished her.” I give AJ a quick head bob. “I made it severe enough to leave a lasting memory if she ever decides to share again.”

Skull speaks up next. “Fox never gave a fuck about the women. I know they stuck around because of the drugs, but, like us, they have no place to go. They’ve put up with a lot of our shit. I think we owe them a say. What’s strange is that Fox kept Red around instead of kicking her ass to the curb like he eventually did to all the other women who spread their legs for him. I’d like to know more about that connection and give Red a chance to defend her actions.”

If I didn’t know better, I would think Skull had a background in communication. That was a damn eloquent speech. I glance around the table. “Are we voting on it?”

“I’m a go for Red having her say,” AJ says, and the other men nod.

“Bring her in, Skull.”

His chair slides back and he leaves the room. A few minutes later, he leads Red in. I can’t read her expression. Skull gives her his chair and grabs one from against the wall. Red meets everyone’s eyes with a little more belligerence than she should. Fucking woman could use a lesson or two in humility. She’s not stupid and must know why she’s here.

“Everything, Red. Leave nothing out,” I say. Skull stitched her face and I have no doubt it hurt like a bitch. The skin around the bandage is red and puffy. Another smaller bandage covers the top part of her breast. It was little more than a scratch of my knife, but I’m hoping it means something to the men in this room.

Red’s long fingernails tap against the table for a moment as if she’s considering. I swear I’ll strangle her if she keeps this up. “I’ll tell you whatever you need to know,” she finally says sweetly.

For her sake, I hope she gives us something that will keep her alive. “Start from the beginning,” I nudge when she doesn’t begin talking immediately.

She rests her palms flat on the table and the infernal clicking stops. She exhales loudly before she begins the story. I’m not feeling the regret for what she did. If
I’m
not, no one the fuck else is either.

“I met Sofia’s mother, Carmen, when Fox brought her to the bar where I worked.” She stares at the wall over AJ’s shoulder before continuing. “Fox and I fucked regular back then. One day, he shows up with this young, beautiful thing on the back of his bike. I’ll admit I was pissed off. Carmen was so innocently pure it was enough to gag you. No one understood what the hell she was doing with Fox. He had the hots for her big time. And he wasn’t as particular back then when it came to skin color. Perry ran the club and had a Native American old lady. You all know that, years later, Fox killed both of them and changed the club to what it was until yesterday.” She takes her eyes from the wall and gives equal attention to everyone at the table. She shakes her head. “Carmen was sweet, vivacious, and incredibly beautiful. You’ve seen her daughter. The two are very similar. Her English wasn’t too good, but she caught on quick. Fox could be quite the ladies’ man when he took the time.” She makes a disgusted face like it pained her to say that. “I watched him devour her completely. He pressured her into using drugs and verbally dragged her down until the drugs were her only escape. It only took a few months before she was addicted and relied on Fox for everything. Once she craved what he provided, he started beating the shit out of her for every small infraction. He called her his Mexican punching bag and said he liked the way she screamed.” Red stops and her eyes turn back to the wall. It’s obvious she doesn’t like replaying these memories. She clears her throat. “Speaking Spanish was one of his major issues. He almost killed her once for saying, ‘gracias’.”

Red glances down at her hands, which are now in fists. “I tried to talk her into leaving him but the drugs held her. I could barely keep up with my own drug habit back then, so I kind of understood.” Red gives a small laugh and her fingernails start clicking again. “Jesus, I won’t deny it. I was glad Fox had someone besides me to beat on.” Her fingers stop moving and she stays silent for a moment. All I can hear in the room is the clank of the ceiling fan. “He began sharing her with his friends. That was the hardest part for her. She’d take a beating, but shit, she hated sex with all those men. I walked a street corner down on Van Buren before I met up with Fox, so sleepin’ with different guys was no big deal for me. Shame was what really controlled Carmen. She’d beg Fox not to loan her out until he beat the shit out of her, stripped her naked, and let those men gangbang her.” Tears roll down Red’s face and I hope like hell they affect the men around this table.

“Go on, Red,” I encourage softly.

“She was pregnant twice before Sofia.” She wipes her eyes with trembling hands. “Fox beat those babies out of her. It’s a miracle he didn’t kill her. Then she discovered she was pregnant with Sofia. She was a dried up old woman and not even thirty.” She looks into AJ’s eyes. Wisely, she knows he’s the one she needs to convince. “I betrayed Fox and helped her get away. I’d do it again too. I’ll pay with my life knowing that I did something good.”

Red takes her eyes from AJ and scans the table. “Fox swore he’d find her and kill her. He looked everywhere. Eventually, one of the boys tagged her walking into a grocery store when Sofia was a year old. When Fox didn’t arrive at the store in time to confront her, he practically screamed this place down. He staked out the store for two weeks before catching her. He beat her so bad she spent more than a week in the hospital. Thank God she didn’t have Sofia with her that day. Fox went down for five years. He served two. By the time he got out, I was off the drugs, but like everyone else here, I had nowhere to go. After Fox did his stint in state, he was more involved in his racial crap too. He got out, took over the club, and made the changes he wanted.” She looks at me. “The men back then were too afraid to mention Carmen. Fox would lose his shit if they did. Most of those men fazed out of the club, were killed in the shit Fox had going down, or Fox killed them himself. There’s really no one around, now that Clutch is dead, who would remember her. I’m the only whore who goes that far back.”