“Ease my suffering, woman,” Shane demanded, sighing at Reesa’s hands creeping under his T-shirt to deftly unzip his pants like she’d been waiting to do it forever. He was rigid and straining for her before Reesa managed to free him.
To hell with pride, Shane decided, giving in to the bliss she brought him and leaning into her eager touch. When she bent and slid her mouth over him without warning as he stood there partially undressed, Shane’s knees buckled at the incredible feeling. They went tumbling to the floor, his greater weight and size taking them both down.
“Either you’re really outstanding, or being macho when a woman does that is an urban myth,” Shane said tightly, catching a giggling Reesa in his arms as they landed with him under her on the floor. “You took my legs right out from under me.”
Next thing Shane knew Reesa was determinedly shoving and pulling until his jeans were down to his ankles. She couldn’t get them off because he was still wearing his shoes.
Then Reesa bent her head and took him into her mouth again, obviously intending to finish what she started. Shane groaned at the heaven it was, but he still pushed her gently off him when she paused to take a breath.
“I want that—I do—more than is right probably, but I need the whole connection this morning,” he said hoarsely, flipping Reesa to her back. “I couldn’t sleep last night thinking about doing this.”
Shane shoved his hands between the folds of her robe and lifted her hips to slide through her wetness with one single hard thrust that only took him only part of the way inside her. It was just enough to remind them both of what they had been missing. The sounds they both made in relief were more animalistic than civilized human.
Knowing Reesa was as desperate for him as he was for her made Shane rougher than he’d intended to be as he pressed harder, trying to bury himself as deeply as he could in her while she was still struggling to take him completely in. Struggling to rein in his control, he slid out partially before finally pressing hard again until he was exactly where he needed to be. Then Shane realized with alarm that he had completely forgotten to put on a condom before doing so.
“Wait honey—wait. Stop moving,” he begged, starting to slide out before things got beyond his control to do so. “I forgot the condom.”
“No—don’t leave. I’m using birth control,” Reesa cried, wrapping her legs tightly around Shane’s waist and digging her heels into his backside to stop his retreat, sighing as she felt him finally push back inside her before becoming very still.
Muscles flexed and clenched in his hips and legs as Shane strained trying to decide what to do. Part of him was relieved. The other part was in shock. Not having had unprotected sex before was something he’d been meaning to mention, but Reesa didn’t always have the best reaction to finding out she was yet another first experience for him.
“Because of a solemn promise to my father, I have never not used protection since I became sexually active, not even with my long term girlfriend in college. I never asked any woman I was with to go without protection. Are you absolutely sure this is okay?” he asked tightly, feeling Reesa’s answer in the way she dragged his mouth to hers to shut him up as she nodded and closed her eyes.
Okay, Shane thought, moving gently now and in wonder of what he was experiencing. It was a bit like having sex for the first time, and to know it was with Reesa—well, he didn’t want to miss any nuance of it. This was not what he planned this morning, but plans didn’t mean much when their mutual desperation levels had already hit fifteen on a scale of one to ten.
“Too damn long,” Shane whispered fiercely against her mouth when Reesa let him surface from the kiss and breathe enough to speak. He was not going to last long in his current hyper-aroused state.
“No. Don’t worry. It’s never too long. It’s always just right,” Reesa said, her sincere gaze seeking Shane’s desperately to make sure he believed her.
Drinking in her green gaze full of awe, Shane laughed softly at her misunderstanding. “God, I am so in love with you,” he said fiercely. “I meant it’s been too long since we got to do this.”
Reesa smiled, but didn’t laugh at her mistake, couldn’t when she was trying to not be incinerated by the friction of an unadorned Shane moving with precision now that he wasn’t worried.
“This isn’t going to last much longer,” he warned her, feeling himself building to an impending explosion.
“Neither am I,” Reesa rasped, feeling him laugh against her as he changed his angle and pressed up on his next stroke. “My God, you do that well.
Again please.
”
“Anything you want,” he agreed hoarsely.
“
Shane
,” she called, her body racked with tremors of relief as the waves lifted her against him in demand. In support Shane stroked her even harder, claiming a right to do it with his triumphant laugh as she shook in his arms over and over while he throbbed in her depths.
Then just as she was coming down off the last wave of her climax, Reesa finally felt Shane find his own release inside her. He slowed then, drawing out every stroke as if enjoying every millisecond of time it took to completely empty himself in her.
Reesa felt Shane kissing the sides of her face, still moving against her now pliant form. Her throat tightened, tears threatened, and she wasn’t completely sure why. Shane’s unrestrained, obvious pleasure in not using a condom surprised her with a level of satisfaction about their lovemaking that she had never felt with any other lover. Sometimes he took everything she offered with the gratitude of a teenager scoring for the first time. Other times, he lost control and took her body like a conquering warrior claiming a mate. Her sense of ownership about him and his body appalled her. Worse because she could see in his gaze he felt the same.
And over the great sex was acceptance. Rightness. Belonging.
To him.
Just like Shane said she did.
Oh God—how did I fall in love with a man who’s still trying to figure out who he wants to be when he grows up?
Reesa made a guttural sound of frustration, not sure whether to laugh or cry. It was never supposed to get this serious. Now what would happen when Shane left or died or just got tired of her crazy life? This worry is exactly what she had been trying to avoid. Panic over the thought of losing him stripped down her defenses, and the truth just came tumbling out of her unable to be checked by any amount of logic.
“Damn it, Shane. I love you. I do. But how can this be happening to us so fast?” Reesa asked, all but sobbing the question against his chest as his rapid heartbeat still drummed hard in her ear. Her emotions were threatening to choke her.
Shane froze at Reesa’s tearful confession of love. He managed to maneuver their bodies until he could see Reesa’s whole face, including the sheen of tears in her eyes that he’d already heard in her voice.
“Do you want the scientific reason or the Shane Larson general rationalization?” he asked, trying to use his business voice.
“No science—it’s too early in the morning,” Reesa told him, wiping her eyes which were still welling up with tears she couldn’t seem to turn off.
“Okay—here it is. I have no idea how it happened that we fell in love so fast, but I’m not dumb enough to pretend otherwise. I hope you aren’t either, regardless of how many dweebs disappointed you in the past,” Shane said.
“It’s not that men disappointed me,” Reesa denied. “They just haven’t stayed. It wasn’t like they cheated or left me because of petty problems. It was always something bigger than that, Shane. I’m not ready to be in love with someone new. You know I’m on the rebound.”
“I don’t give a damn who came before me. I just know I want to spend the rest of my life with you, Reesa. You’re the first and only woman to ever inspire the creative urge in me to want children with her,” he said, bracing his weight on his elbows to take her face in his hands.
“
A creative urge?
You really need some counseling,” she said, fighting not to laugh in his face. It wasn’t funny. It was just—insane for him to be talking that way after two months.
“Why would I joke about that? Look, I’m crazy about the kids you already have. It’s my plan to eventually catch up to you in parenting skills,” he said seriously. “Do you think you might one day want more?”
“
More children?
As in
a baby?
” Reesa repeated in a squeak, appalled at even the thought of adding infant care to the chaos she currently lived with daily. She remembered how tough it had been on April when Sara had come along. Babies disrupted everything and you didn’t get to sleep all night for several years.
“Shane—I can’t talk about any of this without wanting to push you off me and run away screaming. I don’t even want to be in love, much less think about having more children,” she said, her voice tight with fear.
Shane sighed and kissed her temples, unoffended by her doubts. “Well, I guess that’s fair. Why don’t we wait until Zack’s in college to have the baby discussion? It was the whole unprotected sex for the first time in my life thing. You can see why my mind might have gone to imagining having a baby with you in wishful thinking, can’t you?”
Since Shane was still pressing his full weight on her, escape from him was impossible. Out of options to flee, Reesa snorted and finally gave in to worried laughter.
“How the hell did you have sex for over a decade and never once without a condom? You must be more afraid of your father than you are of your mother,” Reesa said.
“More like I just didn’t want to disappoint him,” Shane told her.
His sincerity had her sighing in shame at her reaction. Tomorrow she would feel special, precious, and like the luckiest woman in the world to have been his biggest intimacy risk. But right now, she was still reeling from the baby talk.
In the short time they’d known each other, Reesa really had only one major complaint about Shane. It was that he was always racing ahead, confident he was right, and never giving her much time to think or decide if she agreed with him.
Couldn’t he see she just wasn’t the kind of person who moved that fast in making decisions about important things? She was an accountant for pity’s sake. Slow. Methodical. Checking and rechecking until she was absolutely convinced something was right.
“I’d been planning the unprotected sex thing for a week, but it still ended up happening spontaneously only because
you
forgot. Haven’t you figured out that I’m not like you, Shane? I have a single-minded focus when it comes to sex. It’s the only area of my life capable of bypassing my logical mind, especially when it comes to you,” Reesa declared. “I try very hard not to talk during lovemaking because I’m sure I would only say stupid things.”
“Okay. Let’s back up and shelve the conversation about unprotected sex for now. Good morning,” Shane said, sliding out of her and trying not to laugh at Reesa’s groan of disappointment. “Don’t worry. I’ll be back inside soon. Let’s try the bed next time. The floor sounds good in theory, but it’s hell on the knees.”
Reesa lifted a hand up for him to help her stand and realized her robe was still mostly tied and mostly on.
“Some smooth guy you are. You didn’t even get me naked,” she said in dismay.
Shane pulled up his pants, but didn’t bother with fastening them. They were coming off as soon as they got to her bedroom. He did pull on his shirt just so he wouldn’t get cold.
“Bitch. Bitch. Bitch,” he said with a grin. “Haven’t you had your coffee this morning?”
“No. I just made some before you came,” Reesa said.
Shane grinned at her choice of words, happy when Reesa swore under her breath and blushed.
“You know what I mean,” she chastised. “The brew-finished alarm had just sounded when you knocked on the door. I hadn’t had time to pour a damn cup.”
“That’s because I barely got inside before you attacked me,” Shane said, lifting her hand and tucking it in his. “Lucky for you, I didn’t fall on you when we crashed to the floor. Talk about catching a guy off-guard. You may not talk much during sex, but I’m pretty sure I heard you humming during some of it.”
Reesa colored again, but didn’t tug her hand away. “Don’t tease me. I couldn’t help myself. It had been too long,” she said finally.
“I’m having déjà vu—seems like I heard that once already this morning,” Shane said with a smile.
“Well, you were right,” Reesa said, giving in to his teasing and giggling. “Damn it Shane. I don’t know what we’re going to do when I go back to work. Finding time will be even harder.”
“So don’t go back to work,” Shane said reasonably.
Reesa patted his impressive abs through his T-shirt. “Very nice thought, but not realistic. I have to go back to work, Shane. I have to be employed to keep the kids. I have no choice.”
“Of course you do,” Shane said, frowning. “Take the money I offered you and put off working until Sara starts school full-time. Follow your original plan.”
Reesa shook her head as she headed to the kitchen. “Shane, you’re an amazingly generous person, but I can’t take your money. It wouldn’t feel right to me.”
“Damn it, Reesa,” Shane said, following her and throwing himself down into a chair to keep from putting his hands on her when he was this frustrated. “Explain to me why you’re being stubborn about this. What is the problem with letting me help you?”