Read Castle to Castle Online

Authors: Louis-Ferdinand Celine

Tags: #Classics

Castle to Castle (39 page)

Suppose you're a king . . . your people eat, drink, go to church, and leave you alone . . . all of a sudden fireworks on all sides! . . . they knock over your Bastille . . . and wipe out your regime! . . . Pont-Neuf, Grand Army, and all! you've said one little word too many! all it takes to break that "perfectly natural" charm! . . .

Without boasting, I can say that I watched my step . . . not a faux pas! I led them away as if it were the most natural thing in the world . . . Delaunys, his wife and Lili . . . we left the
Löwen
in plain sight of the
shuppo
. . .
Raumnitz befehl!
hush hush! . . . he salutes . . . okay! . . . direct to the Castle! we take the elevator . . . first Madame Mitre . . . actually she's the one that counts . . . I explain the case . . . the two of them are at the door, waiting for me . . . Madame Mitre understands right away . . . "You know how it is, Doctor, the Ambassador right now!"

It was always "the Ambassador right now" for one reason or another! This was a particularly bad time, his wife née Ulmann had just phoned from Constance that he should do this . . . do that . . . oh, Madame nee Ulmann was a power! the story was that she was opposed to her husband's policies . . . pure hokum, according to Pellepoix° who knew them well, they bickered for the gallery, but they both belonged to the "Great Conspiracy!" . . . possible . . . but in the end one thing is sure, he was drilled, she wasn't . . .

I've told you, Brinon was always perfectly regular with me . . . not cordial, no! . . . but regular . . . he might have been put out with me for not having "superb morale," for not writing in
La France
that Boche victory was around the corner . . . for speaking very freely . . . not playing the game . . . what game was he playing? I never found out! . . . the fact remains that he never asked me any questions . . . he could have . . . I was a doctor and that's that! . . . oh, I practiced all right! I knew every passage, every blind alley and attic in that Hohenzollern fortress! bringing the good word to this one and that one . . . Subject of politics, Brinon left me alone . . . that's unusual! . . . mostly the bigshots in the double game aren't satisfied unless you wave your arms and really get yourself hooked . . . occasionally we exchanged a few words on the subject of letters from Berlin, from the Chancellery . . . mentioning medicine . . . and things I had said at one time or another . . .

"What do you think, Monsieur de Brinon?"

"Nothing . . . I'm reading you the letters from Berlin . . . that's all. . ."

As Bonnard said, Brinon was a cave animal . . . gloomy and secretive . . . you couldn't get anything out of him . . . all the same, six months hefore the end, I went to see him about some ointment . . . sulphur and mercury . . . "Oh, Doctor, come along in six months it will all be over" . . . I didn't ask him which way . . . he never said anything about anything.

Anyway, with my raggedy Delaunys, it wasn't exactly the right time . . .

"What do you want of the Ambassador, Doctor?"

To let them stay in the Castle, because if they go back to the
Löwen
you know von Raumnitz? . . ."

Of course she knew him . . . and his little ways . . . I didn't go into details . . . neither did she . . . she knew all about it . . .

I dive right in . . . bull by the horns . . .

"I'll take them up to the music room . . . they'll behave . . . I vouch for them . . . they'll rehearse . . . I'll bed them down . . . they won't move . . . they'll sleep up there . . . Lili will bring them their
Stam
. . . Lili dances up there . . . I'll tell the servants, I'll tell Bridoux, I'll tell everybody it's for the big Celebration . . . all right? . . ."

Madame Mitre hadn't heard . . .

"What big celebration?"

"Oh, it's his idea . . . the banquet for the 'Retaking of the Ardennes!'"

Madame Mitre doesn't get it . . . she looks at me . . . have I gone off my rocker too?

"No, Madame Mitre . . . no . . . that's the pretext! . . . My mind's all right, but he believes in this Celebration! he's dead sure . . . and sure that he'll be promoted to concert master . . . it's his dream . . . Monsieur Langouvé has promised him . . .. you understand?"

She begins to catch on . . .

"But listen to me, Madame Mitre . . . if I take them back to the
Löwen
. . ."

Oh, she understands that . . .

"You know how they were treated in Cissen? beaten to a pulp . . . so you see . . . he isn't quite right . . . concussion! . . . at his age! . . . just take a look at his head! . . ."

"Oh, Doctor, I believe you . . . very well, I'll tell Monsieur de Brinon there's an orchestra rehearsing . . . for a benefit performance . . ."

"Fine . . . certainly . . . thank you, Madame Mitre! . . . hardly anybody goes up there . . . nobody but Bridoux . . . and the servants . . . it's too cold . . . if anybody asks, I'll say: it's the retaking of the Ardennes . . . the big celebration . . . good-by, Madame Mitre . . ."

So I climb my people up to the seventh floor, Delaunys, his wife, Lili . . . Delaunys and his wife are scratching even worse than we are . . . they'd reinforced their scabies out there . . . I've seen plenty of scabies, but the insects they brought back from the camp and the brush! . . . real flesh plows! . . . galloping scabies! . . . in addition to their bruises and blotches, they were living Chinese puzzles, checkerboards of scabies

"Haven't you any ointment, Doctor?"

"No, but we'll have some soon, Madame!"

I comfort her . . . I don't want them to stop scratching, to stand still and think . . . the idea was to keep them moving . . . get them up those stairs . . . We made it! . . . here we are! the spacious concert hall . . . "Hall of Neptune" they called it . . .

"Oh, very nice! oh, splendid!"

They keep exclaiming . . . he's delighted . . .

"And excellent acoustics, I hope?"

"Admirable, Monsieur Delaunys!"

Indeed, the Hohenzollern princes hadn't stinted . . . the hall was a good six hundred feet long, all draped in pink and gray brocade . . . and down there on the stage at the end the porphyry statue of Neptune . . . brandishing his trident! . . . terrific! . . . standing in an enormous shell . . . alabaster and granite . . .

I've got it! . . . the idea came to me instantly!

"How about it, Delaunys? . . . Monsieur de Brinon has given his permission . . . you won't have to go out . . . you'll sleep in the shell! . . . over there! both of you! . . . you see? . . . no need to go out! . . . they'd pick you up and send you to Cissen! . . . they'd take you back! . . . I'll bring you blankets! . . . nobody'll see you! . . . you'll be a lot better off than at the
Fidelis!
. . ."

They were only too glad to believe me . . .

"Certainly, Doctor! Certainly!"

"And you'll bring us some ointment?"

"Oh yes, Madame . . . tomorrow morning!"

So that's the story . . .

Just then Bridoux comes through! . . . General Bridoux in his boots and spurs! . . . resplendent! . . . he crossed the hall from end to end at lunchtime . . . to the ministers' table . . . one two! one! two! . . . every day at the stroke of noon! and every day at the stroke of noon he made the same observation . . . "Get out of here!" He couldn't stand seeing Lili dance in this hall! so closed-in! . . . not brutal but authoritarian! . . . outside she had the terraces! and what terraces! . . . the air, the view of the whole valley! . . . Minister of War and cavalry general! . . . "Get out of here!" . . .

As for him, he had escaped from Berlin . . . "Get out of here!" from the Russians . . . later escaped from the Val de Grace from the Fifis . . . "Get out of here!" . . . and ended up in Madrid . . . "Get out of here!" . . . That's life in a nutshell . . .

One thing anyway, I had found a place for the Delaunys . . . they spent about a month in Neptune's shell . . . Lili brought them their
Stam
. . . they slept in blankets she brought from the
Löwen
. . . they got along fine with Bridoux . . . they went out on the terraces to please him . . . Later on things happened . . . a lot of things . . . I'll tell you.

I leave Lili at work . . . rehearsing her dances with the Delaunys, her pieces for the Celebration . . . its no joke any more . . . all "perfectly natural"! . . . chaconnes, passe-pieds, rigadoons! . . . after a while we got very serious about it . . . don't tip the kettle . . . don't let the devils out! the "Retaking of the Ardennes"? Certainly! all the ambassadors will be there! . . . of course! the triumph of Rundstedt's army? Oh la la! triumph is putting it mildly!

As for ambassadors, only one . . . the Japanese . . . and a single consul, the Italian . . . maybe in a pinch the one from Vichy . . . who'd escaped from Dresden? . . . and the German Ambassador? Hoffmann? . . . accredited to Brinon . . . Otto Abetz° still gave little "surprise parties" now and then . . . oh, all very harmless and innocent . . . Without prejudging the future but taking the past into account, the Chancellery of the Greater Reich had worked out a certain mode of existence for the French in Siegmaringen, neither absolutely fictitious nor absolutely real . . . a fictitious status, half way between quarantine and operetta, elaborated by Monsieur Sixte, our great legal expert at the Foreign Ministry in Berlin, who had drawn on every possible precedent: the Revocation of the Edicts, the Palatinate, the Huguenots, the War of the Spanish Succession . . . finally we were granted the "conditional, exceptional, and precarious" status of "refugees in a French enclave" . . . Visible marks of our status were our stamps (portrait of Pétain), his
Milice
in uniform, and our unfurled flag on high! and our clarion reveille! . . . but our "exceptional enclave" was itself an enclave in Prusso-Baden territory . . . and watch yourself! this territory itself was an enclave in South Württemberg! Just to give you an idea . . . The total unity of Germany dates from Hitler and not so very unified at that! for instance: there were trains going from Germany to Switzerland that crossed the border ten times, the same one, in fifteen minutes . . .
länder
, loops, hamlets, riverbeds . . . hell . . . I go on and on . . .

One way or another, we were short on ambassadors for this celebration . . . make do with Japan? . . . of course we could invite Abetz . . . as ambassador of what? . . . Abetz went around in a wood-burning car . . . you were always running into him . . . three hundred yards: breakdown . . . another three hundred yards: another breakdown! . . . his big noggin slashed and battered! . . . bubbling with ideas, all of them wrong . . . everybody in Paris knew Abetz, I didn't know him very well . . . no sympathy . . . really nothing to say to each other . . . practically any time you saw him he was surrounded by "clients" . . . courtiers . . . courtier-clients from every Court! . . . the same ones or their brothers! you can drop in on Mendès . . . Churchill, Nasser, or Khrushchev . . . always the same people or their brothers! Versailles, Kremlin, Vel d'Hiv, Auction Rooms . . . Laval! de Gaulle! . . . you'll see . . . gray eminences, punks, shady characters, Academists or Third Estate, pluri-sexuals, rigorists or proxenetists, eaters of hosts or piddle-bread, you'll find them forever sybilline, reborn from century to century! . . . that's the continuity of Power! . . . you're looking for some little poison? . . . some document? . . . that big chandelier? . . . or that little dressing table? . . . that rolypoly groom? . . . yours! . . . one wink, and it's fixed! . . . On his return from Clichy (Dagobert's court) Agobert, bishop of Lyons, already (632) complained that the Court was a sink! a den of thieves and whores! . . . Agobert of Lyons! . . . he should come back in 3060 . . . thieves and whores! hell find the same! Don't doubt it . . . Groom-Eminences and Court hookers!

I'm taking you away from Siegmaringen . . . my head's a puzzle! . . . I was telling you about the street in Siegmaringen . . .
shuppos
. . . but not just
shuppos!
. . . soldiers of every rank and branch of service . . . chucked out of the station . . . the wounded of disbanded regiments . . . units of Swabian, Magyar, Saxon divisions cut to pieces in Russia . . . cadres from God knows where . . . officers of Balkan armies looking for their generals . . . flummoxed . . . same as you could see right here during the big Schelde-Bayonne "shellac steeplechase" . . . addled colonels . . . Soubises without lanterns° . . . you saw them outside shop windows staring in, as if they were looking for somebody inside . . . pretending . . . Abetz in his woodburner stopped every three hundred yards . . . he couldn't have failed to notice that Adolf's army was in a very bad way . . . Abetz never spoke to me . . . I saw him go by, he didn't see me . . . if his car had broken down, he looked in some other direction . . . okay! . . . and then one morning he stopped me . . .

Other books

Descent of Angels by Mitchel Scanlon
The Delta Star by Joseph Wambaugh
The Devil to Pay by Rachel Lyndhurst
Devious Minds by Colleen Helme
Dark Horse by Tami Hoag
Obsession by Susan Lewis
Awaken to Danger by Catherine Mann