Catching Summer (7 page)

The cemetery was a lonely yet beautiful place. There were rows of flowers in every color, lined all the way up the field and around a pond in the center. Austin’s plot was on a hill overlooking the pond. If it wasn’t for the support of his MMA friends, I couldn’t have afforded this elaborate of a resting place. They’d funded the entire service to help me out financially. There was a monument that stood about eight feet tall of an angel warrior, depicting how they all saw Austin in their minds. He was loved by his friends, and especially by me.

The flowers I’d left a week ago were wilted, so I took them off his grave and replaced them with the season’s first set of fall-colored flowers. I sat down on the grass and stared at his name, tracing my finger along the warm marble stone. “I have so much to tell you,” I whispered. “First, I’ll give you the good news.” In my back pocket there was a letter from
Southern Trends,
a well-known magazine about the top places to visit in the South. I opened the letter and set it on the ground in front of me. “I received a letter saying that
our
restaurant is going to be featured as one of the favorite local restaurants in North Carolina. Do you know what this means? It means your dream is finally coming true. People will make a point to visit if they’re in the area. It’ll be just what you wanted. Your brother will be ecstatic when he finds out.”

A tear slid down my cheek and fell onto the letter. “The only problem is that you’re not here to see it happen.” I closed my eyes and hung my head. The warm wind blew across the field, bringing the sounds of swaying branches and rippling water in the pond. It was so peaceful. “I miss you, Austin. Every day I think about you and wish that I could’ve done something to help you. If I’d known that something was wrong, I could’ve gotten us help. The worst part of it all is that I know what was going through your mind while they had me. I know you blamed yourself. I have never and will never blame you for what happened.” The sound of his pleas for the men to let me go echoed in my ears. I wanted to forget the terror in his voice and the way it had shattered my heart. I never got to say goodbye or touch his body before they threw him away in the alley.

“All you ever wanted was to be a better fighter, a better husband,” I cried. “I just wish I could’ve told you more often that you were all of those things and more. You gave me some of the best years of my life, even though they were over too quickly. No matter what happens, I want you to know that our memories will always be in my heart. I will never forget you or the love we had.” I folded the letter back up and stuck it in my pocket before getting to my feet. Standing there, I took a deep breath and inhaled the scent of fresh-cut grass and flowers. Every time I visited, I waited to hear Austin’s voice come in through the wind. Sadly, it never came and it never would. He was gone.

“Goodbye, Austin.”

Monday ended with Grayson buying everyone at the bar drinks after he heard the good news. Even Philip showed up, but only to tell me he needed to move our appointment to Wednesday instead of Tuesday because something had come up. Since he was there, he ended up celebrating with us. We were excited for the interview and agreed that we’d both be present and we’d make sure Austin was our main focus. Through all of the excitement, I felt bad about telling Luke to make sure Evan left me alone for the day. It would’ve been nice to tell him.

Now it was Tuesday morning and I was super early, all alone in the practice facility parking lot while I waited for everyone to show up for training. Today I had to renew my first-aid certification. Evan would be my partner, and my stomach was in knots knowing I’d see him again.

Coach Joel arrived first, followed by some of the players. There was no news of Jaxon’s death so I was pretty sure Evan hadn’t gone after him for what he did. I had yet to see him or Lindsey. My waiting came to an end when Evan pulled up in his truck and parked beside me. He locked eyes with me and my heart jumped, beating wildly against my chest. Taking a deep breath, I let it out and got out of my car. Evan tossed his gym bag over his shoulder and approached me cautiously.

“Are you all right?” he asked, his voice gentle, deep.

I nodded but then caught a glimpse of his hands and his bruised knuckles. “I am, but now I have to ask you the same question.”

He looked at his hands and chuckled lightly. “I knew you were going to ask. I’m fine, but I can’t say the same for Jax.”

“So you did go after him. I didn’t know if you would or not.”

“After what he did, he deserved a lot worse. My only concern was for you.” He moved closer and set his gym bag down before reaching for my hands. I let him take them and immediately relaxed with his touch. “I wanted to see you yesterday. I was worried you’d hate me after what happened.”

I squeezed his hands. “Never. I’m just glad I was there and that Luke showed up.”

“Me, too,” he murmured. More people started pulling into the parking lot, including Jaxon and Lindsey. I watched Lindsey storm inside, not even attempting to look our way. Jaxon, on the other hand, glowered at Evan when he got out of his little black sports car.

“Oh my God, you did that to him?” I asked, eyes wide. Almost all of Jaxon’s face was black and blue; he looked horrible. “What is your coach going to say about that?”

“Don’t know, don’t care. If Jaxon says it was me, I’m going to make sure he regrets it. But I highly doubt he’ll do that because I can have him thrown off the team for what he did.”

“The same goes for Lindsey if I’d just turned her in. I guess I’m just a nice person,” I mumbled.

“And that’s what I respect about you. Not many people are like that.”

“You are,” I said. “If you weren’t, you’d have turned Jaxon in. It looks like we have something in common.”

Letting my hands go, he picked up his bag and threw it over his shoulder. “I’m pretty sure we have a lot more in common than just that. I’ll show you soon. That is, if you want me to.”

I winked up at him, playing it cool even though my whole body trembled in anticipation. “I’ll think about it and let you know.”

Opening the door, he ushered me inside, smiling mischievously at me as if he knew something I didn’t. Instead of going down the hallway toward the locker room, we went the opposite way toward the meeting room. “Lara said you had some good news to share. She thought maybe you’d want to be the one to tell me.”

“Yes,” I squealed excitedly. “I wanted to call and tell you yesterday, but the day sort of slipped by me. The restaurant is going to be featured in
Southern Trends
as one of the best restaurants in North Carolina. Do you know what this means?”

“That you’ll need to hire more staff since the restaurant’s going to be busy as shit,” he commented with a smile.

I laughed and elbowed him in the side. “That, too, but it’ll give the tavern the publicity it needs. For so long, I was afraid it would tank and we’d go bankrupt. It’s taken off the past year and now it’ll only get better. All I wanted was to make Austin’s dream come true and it has. It’s an amazing feeling.”

“Well, Austin was a very lucky man. Lara told me you went to visit him yesterday. I’m sure he’s proud of what you and his brother have accomplished.”

“Thanks,” I said softly, smiling up at him. “I didn’t know what you would think of me visiting his grave.”

“Did you think it would make me mad?” He waited for an answer, and all I could do was shrug in reply. In all honesty, I thought it would make him uncomfortable. Taking my hand, he turned us down a vacant hallway and backed me into a corner. It was dark and quiet, except for the pounding in my ears. He gently pushed me against the wall and blocked me in with his arms. “You loved your husband, Summer. I’m pretty sure you still do. Visiting his grave doesn’t bother me. I want you to be able to talk to me about these things.”

I nodded quickly and felt the burn behind my eyes. “I’m trying, Evan. It’s so hard to let go.”

His hands gently slid up my arms until he cupped my cheeks and tilted my head back. He bent down and breathed me in, his body so close to mine. My skin broke out in chills as the stubble on his cheeks rubbed across my neck. “You don’t need to let him go. I would never ask that of you. All I want is for you to find room for me. I just hope you don’t wait for me to pass out again before telling me how you really feel.”

Gasping, I pushed on his chest so I could see his face. “What are you talking about?”

Chuckling, he trailed his fingers down my cheek. “I wasn’t asleep when you kissed me the other night. I heard every word you said and felt every touch. Is what you said true? That I am what you want?”

“I can’t believe you were awake,” I hissed low. “I wasn’t ready for you to actually hear that.”

His gray eyes bore into mine. “Well, I did. And now I want to kiss you knowing that nothing is going to hold us back.” His thumb brushed across my lips as he stared down at my mouth. “Say yes, sunshine.”

Leaning closer, he stopped with his lips only a breath away. His fingers caressed my skin and I closed my eyes, moaning as his warmth seeped into my body. He was so close, but I wanted him closer.

“Yes,” I breathed, wrapping my arms around his neck. “Nothing will hold us back.” His hands, his lips, and his scent engulfed me. I opened up to him and let him kiss me, long and deep, but most of all it was full of need. He needed me and I needed him. There was no turning back.

After our first-aid class, Evan walked me out to my car before having to go out on the field with the guys. It was strange how everything came back to me from nursing school. I hadn’t used any of my medical knowledge in so long I was afraid I’d lost it. It turned out that I still had my nursing skills.

My day was cut short since I wanted to make sure the restaurant was in top shape before the journalist came to interview us and take pictures. I was happy with the way it looked, but I wanted it to be perfect for Austin’s sake.

Putting his hands on my waist, Evan guided me back toward the car and leaned against me. “What are you doing this weekend?”

Narrowing my eyes, I grinned and circled my arms around his neck. “Working, probably. Why?”

“I want you to come to the away game with me. Do you think Lara and Grayson can handle the restaurant without you?”

The thought of going away with him excited me, but I hadn’t talked to Grayson about him yet. That was an obstacle I had yet to overcome. I didn’t know what he would think about me moving on to another man. “I don’t know yet,” I told him. “Can I give you a maybe and call it good for now?”

Grinning mischievously, he leaned down and kissed my neck, trailing his lips up to my cheek. “Is there anything I can do to persuade you?”

I giggled and pushed him away. “Yeah, you can let me get to work. I have a busy week ahead of me.”

He opened my door and I tossed my purse onto the passenger seat. “Will you be here tomorrow?”

“Of course,” I replied, but then my smile faded when I realized what day it was. I usually met with Philip on Tuesdays but he’d had to reschedule. “No, wait, I can’t. I have an appointment.”

“With your therapist?” he asked. Embarrassed, I lowered my head, but he tilted up my chin with his finger. “Hey, there’s no need to be ashamed that you needed help. I thought maybe you were moving past it.”

“And I think I have,” I confessed. “This past week has been a whirlwind for me. I told Philip at my last visit that I think I’m approaching the end. He was the only person I could really talk to until…”

“Until what?” he asked softly.

I lifted my gaze to his. “Until you.”

He lowered his lips to mine, holding me with his hand at the back of my head. I didn’t want him to let me go, but unfortunately, he had to. “Then meet me for breakfast before your appointment. I want to see you tomorrow. We can take things slow.”

“Slow, huh? I think I can manage that.”

“And then maybe you could squeeze me in for dinner?”

“Only if you come to the restaurant. I’ll be there until closing every night this week. Now next week, we can probably work something out. I’ll be there during the days and Lara will be there at night.”

A smile lit up his face. “I look forward to it. That means I can take you out on a real date.”

“Won’t this interfere with your bachelor status?” I teased.

“Yeah, but I don’t give a shit about that. If you want me to stay one, I can. I’ll leave it up to you.” He kissed me one last time and shut the door after I got in the car. As I watched him walk away and his words sank into my head, I realized I already knew what I wanted.

Evan and I chose to meet at a local café that was just a block from Philip’s office. I was a little early and hungry as hell, so I ordered two blueberry scones and a hot chocolate and had an Asiago cheese bagel packaged up for Philip. As soon as I sat down, Evan walked through the door.

“I’m not late, am I?”

“No, I’m starving. Plus, they only had two scones left and I wanted to get them before someone else did.”

Shaking his head, he smiled and waltzed over to the counter. The woman at the register recognized him and her face brightened. She giggled at everything he said and made sure he didn’t have to wait long for his order. When he walked away, every head in the place turned to watch him take a seat with me.

“Nice choice,” I said, glancing down at his pastries. The apple fritters were my other favorite.

Taking a bite of his fritter, he nodded in satisfaction until the whole thing was gone. He looked down at the to-go bag I had sitting on the table and asked, “What’s in there?”

“A farewell gift, I suppose. It’s a bagel for Philip. I think I’m going to make today my last appointment.”

His eyes went wide. “Are you serious? That’s great. And you think you’re ready for that?”

I shrugged. “Who knows, really? But I think it’s time to try. My nightmares don’t come as often, and for the past couple of weeks I’ve actually been able to sleep more than four hours at a time.”

“That’s all you sleep? Have you ever taken medication?”

“Yeah, but I noticed it made my dreams worse, more vivid. So I figured no sleep was better than that.” Sleep was my enemy. I was terrified to close my eyes for fear of what I’d see. Every day, I prayed for that fear to go away. Evan nodded in agreement, but I could tell he was worried about me by the frown on his face. “What will you be doing in practice today?” I asked.

“Same old shit. Coach wants me with Gavin one-on-one so I can make sure he’s just as good as I am. He wants another record-breaking wide receiver in case something happens to me.”

“Let’s hope that doesn’t happen,” I added. “Do you have a backup plan in case you can’t play football anymore? What did you study in college?”

“Business, actually. I was one of the top students in my class. But to be honest, if something ever happened to me I could see myself coaching.”

“Or you could always help out at the restaurant, since you know so much,” I said, laughing.

In all seriousness, he nodded. “If you ever needed me, you know I would. I just hope me needing a new job doesn’t happen for a very long time.”

“Same here.” Drinking the last of my hot chocolate, I finally took a glance around the room and noticed all the stares. “Evan,” I whispered, “why is everyone looking at us?”

About that time, a little girl with golden braids and missing front teeth walked up to our table, carrying a newspaper and pen. A lady with the same blond hair and eyes watched curiously, with a big smile on her face. She waved at me and I waved back.

“Can I have your autograph, please?” she asked Evan sweetly.

He beamed and gently took the pen from her grasp. “Of course, sweetheart. What’s your name?”

“Abbey.”

Evan wrote an inscription to her and handed her the paper, smiling. “Well, Abbey, thank you for coming to visit me. Is your mom about to take you to school?”

She nodded excitedly. “Yes, and now I can tell all my friends that I met you.” Abbey then turned to me. “Do you mind signing this, too?”

“Me?” I asked incredulously. “Why on earth would you want my autograph?” When she set the paper down in front of me, I noticed it wasn’t just Evan on the front page of the sports section. It was a picture taken at the football game when he’d picked me up and swung me around in his arms. I stared at it, at the smile on both of our faces. It was perfect. The title of the article was
COUGARS ON THEIR WAY TO SUPER BOWL?
“Oh my God.”

“Please,” the little girl begged. “You’re Evan’s girlfriend. That makes you famous.”

With shaking hands, I took her pen and signed my name with a couple of hearts and a smiley face. I had no clue what to write. After I handed it back to her, she giggled and skipped over to her mother. “I wasn’t expecting to see us in the paper like that.”

Evan chuckled and reached for my hand. “I was waiting on you to mention it. I saw it this morning before coming here. It’s a good picture of us.”

“It is,” I agreed. “I actually look happy. But how did they find out my name? I don’t even know what the article says.”

He squeezed my hand. “It doesn’t say anything about your past, if that’s what you’re worried about. And it’s the media, Summer. It’s not that hard to figure out who you are.”

“I understand that, but what does it say? And why did they choose that picture to print?”

“Hell, I don’t know, maybe because it was a good picture. They did the same thing to Cooper and Kate. It’s just the price you pay for being with me.” His lips tilted up in a grin. “And besides, now that everyone knows who you are, they’ll be checking out the tavern. I think it’s a win-win.”

“I’m not here with you in hopes you’ll get the restaurant more business, Evan. I’ve handled that on my own.”

“Yes, you have. But I’m here to help you in any way I can. That’s what you do when you care about someone.” He quickly glanced down at his phone and groaned. “All right, sunshine, I have to go before I’m late.”

We both stood, and he grabbed my trash and threw it away while I carried the bag with Philip’s bagel. Once outside, he wrapped his arms around my waist and kissed me. “I’ll come by tonight after practice so I can see you.”

I kissed him again and nodded. “Okay. I’ll see you then.” He winked at me before taking off across the street and disappearing around the corner. I pulled out my phone, curious to see if anyone had texted about the article. It just so happened I had a gazillion from Lara, and a couple from Kate and Grayson. I could already imagine Lara’s with the overly dramatic exclamation points and shouts of happiness. Kate’s was probably the same way, since she and Lara were just alike. Grayson’s, however, had me worried. Instead of looking at them, I pocketed my phone and walked the block to Philip’s office.

Once at his building, I climbed the stairs to his suite and opened the door. His secretary, Anita Crabtree, welcomed me with a smile. Her brown hair was in the usual bun, and she had on the type of sweater vest you’d see older teachers wear. I think maybe she was one before she retired and started working for Philip.

“Summer, how are you this morning?” she greeted me warmly.

“Good and you?”

“Peachy, my dear. Dr. Parker’s expecting you, so you can go right on in.”

“Thank you, Anita.” His door was just across the hall, so I took a deep breath and entered. He had his back to me, holding the newspaper picture up in front of him. “I see you got the paper as well,” I said.

“Every morning,” he replied, swiveling in his chair to face me. His hair was shorter than it had been last week, and he was dressed in a pair of jeans and a blue-and-white-striped button-down shirt. More casual than I’d ever seen him. He even had more stubble on his face, a more rugged appearance.

I set the bag in front of him and took a seat. “I brought you breakfast.”

His smile brightened when he opened it up. “Ah, an Asiago cheese bagel. You know me so well.”

“I should hope so,” I said with a laugh. “I’ve been talking to you for almost two years. I consider you more a friend than my therapist now.”

“If I was your friend, I’m pretty sure you wouldn’t have forgotten to tell me about your new boyfriend. What’s going on with you and the football player?”

Sighing, I leaned back in the chair. “I had no clue they were going to put that picture in the paper.”

Philip took a bite of his bagel and shrugged. “Well, you look happy in it. I have to give you that. I’m assuming
everyone
will know who you are once the story circulates.”

“Including Austin’s family,” I added sadly.

He sat back with furrowed brows. “Do you think they’ll get angry with you?”

I shrugged. “I don’t know. I hope not. This is all so new to me.”

“Are you two serious?”

“Not in the way you’re thinking. We haven’t even gone on a date yet. I do like him, though. He’s the first man I’ve felt anything for in a long time.”

“I see. And does he feel the same way about you?”

Looking out the window, I could see the football stadium. “Yes. It scares me because I don’t know the first thing about being with someone. Austin is all I’ve ever known.”

“Just take your time,” he suggested. “I know guys like that are used to getting what they want. I’d hate to see you pressured into doing something you don’t want to do.”

“He’s not like that, I assure you. Evan’s different. I’ve known him for a long time now.”

Philip got up and sat down beside me, studying me. “Good. Although, I have to say, you seem different today. This past week has changed you. Do we owe that to your newfound love?”

I laughed and shook my head. “Not exactly. Maybe half of it, but it’s also that the tavern is going to be featured in
Southern Trends.
I can’t begin to tell you how excited I am. For the first time in my life, everything feels right.”

Turning toward me, he grabbed my hand and covered it with his other one. “That’s amazing, Summer. I’m so proud of you and how far you’ve come. From what I’m hearing, it sounds like you might be ready to be on your own. Don’t you think?”

Nodding, I agreed. “I believe so. It’ll hurt to stop coming to you because it feels like we’ve grown close. I don’t know what I’m going to do without you.”

“I’m not going anywhere, Summer. I’m still going to come to the restaurant, and instead of analyzing you as a doctor, I’ll talk to you as a friend. You’re not getting rid of me that easily.” He helped me to my feet. “Although I think I’m going to miss you. Your smile always brightened up this stuffy office.”

I wrapped my arms around his neck and hugged him tight. “I’ll miss you, too. If something happens and I need to call…”

He held me tight around the waist. “Then you call me, okay? I’m always here for you if you need me.”

“Thanks, Philip. That means a lot to me.”

Letting me go, he stepped back and leaned against his desk. “So is there anything else you want to talk about before you go? It
is
your last session.”

Smiling, I shook my head. “I actually think I’m good. Maybe now when you come to the restaurant I can ask
you
questions instead of our conversations being all about me.”

“I look forward to that,” he murmured.

“Take care, Philip.” Opening the door, I breathed a sigh of relief and looked back at him one more time before walking out of his office and out of the building. It felt good to be on my own.

By the time I got to the restaurant, Lara was champing at the bit. She greeted me by the door and pulled me into the office. “Why haven’t you answered any of my texts?”

“Uh, maybe because I’ve been busy. What’s going on?”

“You and Evan are what’s going on. I saw the picture of you two. You both look so freaking adorable. They’re all calling you his girlfriend. They even mentioned the restaurant. How cool is that?”

“Has Grayson seen it? Have you talked to him?”

Her smile faded. “He’s not here yet. Do you think he’ll have something to say about it?”

I shrugged. “I don’t know. I keep wondering what Austin’s family is going to say. I don’t want them to think I’m going to forget him.”

Lara put her hands on my shoulders and squeezed. “No one’s going to think that, Summer. We all know you love and miss Austin. You’re twenty-eight years old. Surely they wouldn’t expect you to be alone for the rest of your life. And if they do, they can suck a big fat cock and get over it.”

We both burst out laughing and I hugged her. “Oh, sis, what would I do without you?”

“Go insane. I’m glad I can make you laugh.”

“You do more than that, and I love you so much for it.”

She squeezed me hard. “And I love you.”