Read Cease (Bayonet Scars Book 7) Online
Authors: JC Emery
Standing in front of the classroom door with the stupid permission slip in my hand, I suck in a deep breath. All the windows on this side of the building are high up, near the ceiling, save for a small square window at eye level, in the center of the bright blue door. I peer in and freeze.
There must be about ten students in the room, a much smaller number than during the school year. There are two little girls huddled together at one long table, their refuge among the sea of boys surrounding them. But that's not what has my blood running cold--it's the sight of the skinny, pale-faced boy with wavy light brown hair and large, sad brown eyes. He sits hunched over in his chair, his hands in his lap, and his bottom lip pulled between his teeth. Ryan sits beside him, a scowl on his face, his eyes focused up on the ceiling. A woman in her thirties, who I assume is their teacher, stands in front of Ryan with her hands on her hips. She's pissed about something, and knowing my boy, there's no telling=. That doesn't bug me. The kid isn't bothered by her, so neither am I. It's Ian that makes me take pause. I squint my eyes and stare at the red, angry scar that mars his face. He's been scratching at it, I can tell. It's not normally this red or obvious. Their teacher keeps going. Ryan rolls his eyes. And while the two of them are in some kind of battle of wills, Ian continues to sink further and further into himself. His hand comes up to his face and scratches at his scar. He flinches on contact and rocks himself back and forth. His movements are small, inconspicuous. Nobody seems to notice. Except I do. I see this boy with all his pain and damage. I see his heart and his mother's spirit that lives in him so brightly. I see this kid who's been through some serious shit and the way he just caves in on himself. It's not fucking right, and I'm going to make this better for him. I have to.
Turning the knob and pushing the door open, I try to avoid the curious looks from all the kids but mine.
The lady, Mrs. Rhodes, turns my way and blanches. She forces a smile to her face and, with tight lips, says, "Can I help you?"
"Yeah, I'm here for my boys," I say and bridge the gap between us. Reluctantly, I hand over the fucking permission slip. It's ridiculous that I have to explain myself. These are my kids. Well, the smug-looking one making rude faces at his teacher's back is definitely mine. The other one is mine, too. His momma just doesn't know it yet.
"Okay, well, we're in the middle of an assignment right now." She turns her head toward the boys, catching Ryan's expression. She clenches her jaw and tries to calm herself down. My mouth twitches as I fight to keep the smile off my face. He's such a little asshole, and I'm a shit parent for enjoying this. If Ruby were here, she'd shut him down real quick, but that's what mothers are for.
From beside Ryan, Ian sits up a little straighter now. His face is a mix of worry and fear--and more of the latter than the former. His eyes volley between his teacher and Ryan with an alarm that worries me. I could tell this Rhodes lady that he's freaking out and I need to get him home, but I'm not going to do him like that. He's nine today--fucking nine--and it's time he and Ryan start learning how to be a men. I can't teach them how to handle their own shit if I run to his rescue.
"How about you just send it home with them. We got shit to do, and their mom's waiting on us."
"Language, Mr. Stone." Mrs. Rhodes's jaw ticks in irritation. "Their mom? I thought . . ." she trails off.
"Boys, pack up. We're going," I say without taking my eyes off of the woman in front of me. I don't bother explaining the situation to her. She wouldn't get it anyway.
We make it out of the classroom and to the van before either of them speaks.
"That was so cool, Dad!" Ryan shouts from the backseat. He bounces in place. Leave it to my kid to be fucking excited over me telling his teacher off. While Ryan chatters about whatever the fuck it is that his teacher did to piss him off this time, Ian sits in his seat in silence with his brows pulled together.
"Hey, bud. What's going on over there?" I keep one eye on the road and the other on the quiet boy behind me. He doesn't respond, so I try again. "Why are you so quiet?"
"Where's my mom?"
"She's at the clubhouse." He's opening up, which is good. It also gives me something to focus on aside from the fact that I'm driving a fucking minivan. I bought the stupid thing as kind of a joke for the little woman, but since this was the only thing available for me to pick the boys up in, it's not fucking funny anymore. I'm trading this goddamn thing in for something I can be seen in around town. If any of my brothers see me in this mom-mobile, they might take my fucking cut.
After a quick stop by the trailer park in town to pick up Josh--the boys' friend who somehow managed to evade summer school--the four of us head toward the park. Might be the first time in my life, but we're running early, and I have to circle the lot a few times before I give up and put the car in park. Keeping three rowdy boys contained in one vehicle without issue takes some kind of special mastery I don't have. By the second lap around the park, all three are unbuckled and Ryan and Josh are wrestling. They probably shouldn't be doing that, but fuck it. They bump their damn heads, they might learn to sit the fuck down. Christ, I don't know how Ruby does it all day.
"Ow!" Ryan screams from the very back of the van. One of his legs is stuck straight up in the air as it kicks relentlessly at Josh's side as he keeps my boy pinned down. The kid deserves it, so unless there's blood, I'm staying in my fucking bubble. Ian's in the seat in front of them, facing the back, and he's actively coaching Ryan in how to get out of Josh's hold. The kid has a surprising amount of knowledge regarding wrestling maneuvers.
"Dad, help!" Ryan screams. I smile to myself and turn around in my seat to get a better view.
"Just tap out. He's got you pinned," Ian says with a sigh. Already bored of the action, he turns around and faces me. "Are you going to help him?"
"Do you think I should?"
Ian thinks on it for a moment before he grins and shakes his head. "No," he says. "He started it."
"You know if you need it, I got your back right?" He nods his head and gives me an unenthusiastic, "Yeah", but I can tell he doesn't mean it. The boy's probably had a lot of men promise him shit they couldn't deliver throughout his life. "I'm gonna show you. Every single day, I'm gonna be here for you. You and your mom."
He doesn't say anything. He just stands there, watching me for a long moment before his eyes get really big and the largest grin I've ever seen spreads across his face. His eyes are firmly focused on something behind me.
Ruby
.
When I turn around, I see her. She's standing in front of the minivan, hands on her hips and a smirk on her face. She raises an eyebrow at me and shakes her head. Ian and I fight to see who can get out of the mom mobile first. I think he wins by a hair, but I'm so focused on my own pursuit that I don't push it when the kid jumps out of the side door and screams, "I win!"
"We weren't even racing!" I shout and scoop him up in my arms. My back aches as I spin him around in circles. He's not nearly as small as he was even a few months ago. "You're a cheat!"
Ian squeals in delight and reaches out for Ruby, just barely missing her outstretched arms as we make another circle. He's laughing a full belly laugh that warms my fucking heart. He could probably do this forever, but my head is already spinning, so I set him down and gather my bearings.
"Doesn't matter. Momma cheats all the time and gets away with it."
"Does she now?" My question is for Ian, but my eyes are for Ruby. She's smiling at us in a way that makes it impossible for me to not smile back. It's not the happy, joyful smile I give our boys. It's different. I don't know how exactly. I just know it doesn't feel quite the same.
"She cheated during Monopoly last week," Ryan says, bouncing toward us. Josh follows, rubbing one eyes and using the other to glare at my kid. As Josh passes, his eyes meet mine and I pat him on the back. Josh is a little taller than Ryan, but my kid's a fucking bruiser.
"I did not!" Ruby's eyes are wide as she stares down at Ryan in fake disbelief.
"Yes you did. You also said liars get their butt spanked!" Ryan darts around me with an outstretched open palm, but I catch him before he can smack her.
"Hey, that ass is mine," I say with narrowed eyes at my son. He glares back at me, and I swear to Christ the kid is my fucking clone. God help the entire goddamn world. When I fix my attention back on Ruby, I lick my lips and watch as her eyes heat. Jesus fuck, this woman could kill me with a single moan. She's going to moan for me one of these days, and my heart is just going to give out right then and there.
"Tell me there's a reason these punks aren't in school," she says. Her tone is a mix of hopeful and suspicious, but she's not pissed, so that's something.
"There is," I say and pull a red bandanna out of my back pocket and bend down to face Ian. He stares at me, almost nervously, but I smile, and he relaxes in response. "I'm gonna put this on your eyes. Is that okay with you?"
His eyes automatically dart to Ruby's, and after a thoughtful moment, he nods his head. Trust is everything with this kid. With Ryan, you can just grab him and blindfold his ass. He'll pitch a fit about it, but he won't be distressed. Knowing everything Ian's been through, much less with a man he trusted and looked up to, I can't do the same with him. He needs to trust me so I can help him work through his shit. So when I reach up and put the blindfold around his eyes, I'm talking to him the whole time. Mostly, I'm telling him about Ryan's last birthday when he got us kicked out of the pizza place. That ban lasted for almost an entire month before the owner realized how much pizza the club orders and lifted it for the sake of his business. Still, I can't say it wasn't embarrassing to have my kid break into that machine that's totally rigged but is supposed to give you a chance to grab and win a stuffed animal. Even after I told him to give back the quarters he'd gotten out, he still managed to make it home with almost four bucks in his shoes. I was pretty proud of the little asshole, if I'm being honest.
"What are we doing?" Ruby's biting her lip. She watches me as I stand up and place a hand on Ian's back.
"We're throwing a fucking party here," I say. "It's Ian's birthday, isn't it?"
Her eyes widen to the size of saucers before the tears start. The fucking tears. I pretend not to notice and just shrug off her reaction like it's not a big deal even though I know damn well it is a big deal for her and her son. I just don't like the tears. Thank fuck she has a son and not a daughter. I don't know how I'd handle all the crying.
My steps falter with the thought. She
does
have a daughter. She also has another son. They're not here, but that doesn't mean they don't exist or matter to her. Ian was old enough when they were born to remember them. I know Ruby talks about them as much as she can so that Ian never feels like they're forgotten or disposable. That's the worst thing, she said, the idea that Ian might think she could just toss a kid aside. She couldn't, but he's a little kid, and he needs to be reminded of that fact and often. I can't give her back the time she's lost, but I'm going to try like hell to make sure she's reunited with them one day. I haven't asked her anything else about the twins since she told me about them. I don't know what to say. Every time I think about that motherfucker who hurt her, I want to kill someone. She begged me to leave it alone, so I have. For now. But the first chance I get, those babies are coming home, and fuck anybody who gets in my way.
"What did you do?" Her voice is a mix of amazement and curiosity.
"Something you were afraid to do," I say and don't meet her eyes. I know why she didn't plan a party for him. She doesn't want to give him something he might not ever get again. But what she doesn't know is that this isn't a one-time deal. This is the first of many we're going to have as a family, and even though she's not ready to admit that yet, I am. Ruby gets my boy in a way no woman ever has. She tolerates me and my shit like nobody else ever could. So fuck her doubts. She's ours.
Looking at my woman, I see the tears clearing from her eyes. I kind of like it, knowing they're happy tears. Feeling a little fucking romantic, I take her hand in mine and give it a squeeze. We walk across the park and over the hill that separates the lot I parked in from the playground where my mom has the party set up. When we get to the top, we stop and I grin to myself at the gasp that escapes my girl.
The trees surrounding the playground have been decorated with balloons. Ma's already got three of the grill stations going with burgers and hot dogs, and the entire club is here. Grady's got his woman here, and she's starting to show, so I know we're going to have a new little fuck running around soon. Chief's daughter, Elle, is on the swings, trying to see who can pump higher with Butch's daughter, Nicole. Across from the crowd of adults is Butch's woman, Sheryl, and their baby, Jeremy. Kid was just barely hatched and he's already got a handful of lost girls losing their shit over him.
"You didn't." Ruby's got her free hand over her mouth, and the fucking tears are back, but I don't care. She's happy, and fuck if that doesn't make my entire goddamn day. It makes riding around in that minivan like a bitch totally worth it.
"You ready, Ian?"
"Yeah," he says with a shout. I remove the blindfold from his eyes and pat him on the back.