Epilogue
I was nervous. In fact, I felt like I was about to puke as I looked at myself in the mirror. It wasn’t exactly how I had planned this as a little girl. I had planned to do everything in my power to stop this from happening when I was a child. I had hated the idea of going through this ceremony and now I felt my hands shaking as I looked forward to it. My life had changed so much over the past year as I thought back over it all.
I was ready. I knew that I was ready for this. This was going to happen. Our ordeal had ended almost two weeks ago, but still I dreaded this. There was a knot in my stomach. We weren’t chained together any more, not physically at least, but I could still feel him. He was nervous too. I worked with my hair. It never worked right, but still I tried.
“Damn it!” One of the ladies came up to help me. She was an older woman, a member of Devin’s pack.
“It’s fine. It will be just fine. Everything’s going to be okay,” she crooned at me as she worked carefully through my hair. “We’ve all been through this.”
“Where’s my sister?” She was the only family that I had left. I didn’t want her to miss this.
“She’s outside, setting up. Do you want her in here?” The woman looked concerned, taking a stance that showed that she was afraid that I was going to bolt at any moment. I wasn’t going to run, but still that didn’t take away the fear that I was feeling. She continued to stare at me. “I can send someone to get her here.” It was a hastily made promise that I knew that she would keep.
I felt like crying, but fought against the urge. “Please.”
The woman working with my hair turned to another lady in the room. “Get her please.” There was an exchange of knowing nods as they ran out to get my sister, but I wasn’t really paying attention.
“Fynna!” It was less than a minute later that I heard her voice calling my name.
“Thank God you’re here.” I turned to my sister, destroying the work that the older lady had done with my hair. “I can’t do this. You have to get me out of here. What’s going on? This is so permanent. I can’t do this. I can’t do it.” I was starting to hyperventilate.”
“You can do this. You want to do this, remember?” She reached up and touched my arm. “It’s going to be fine. You love him, remember?”
“I know I love him, but is that enough?”
“It was enough for you to give him a piece of your life.” She reminded me of something that I didn’t want to think about.
I shuddered as I felt his mind. He was freaking out a bit too. He was close, that’s why I could feel him so strongly and the time that we had spent together planning our shifter wedding had been a nightmare to put together. At least, it had been until the local witch told us not to plan over everyone else’s free time, but to place this event when we wanted it. They could work around us. We had moved all of my stuff into Devin’s house over the past two days, and I knew that my stuff would be waiting for us. Tonight would be the first night that we officially lived together, even if we had spent several nights at each other’s houses.
We hadn’t lived together before. This was a change in my life, something that would affect the rest of my life. It was perfectly natural for me to feel nervous about it. All of the ladies went to work, helping me with my dress and my hair. They put make up on me but it didn’t feel right. I wasn’t comfortable.
We had picked up some human customs over the last few years and our ceremonies had become more and more like theirs. In a sense I was getting married in less than fifteen minutes, but this was a bit different. He was going to be my mate. I fought to get myself in control and I reached out to him. He was going through the exact same thing. This was permanent, and as a result, was meant to be frightening. We mate for life; living together and raising a family, growing old and helping his pack accomplish its goals.
I tried to remember what they would expect from me. I was going to be a defender, a supporter, a lover and a friend and he was expected to fulfill the same things. We would live through illness and attacks. We would have adventures together and because of the spell, we would die together. It was the way that we were expected to live.
I took a deep breath and walked out to the man that would become my mate. We met each other in the small park, and I looked at him. He was dressed to the nines, a handsome man and a part of me wanted to faint at the sight of him. He was magnificent looking and the way that he was staring at me, I could tell that he was impressed.
Obviously, the other women had done pretty well. The ceremony was beautiful, but a little too long for my taste. I just wanted it to be over. When it was over, that was it. We were mated. We had no reception. I saw no need. The next day there would be a party at the tribe where people could celebrate an Alpha’s mating, but our first night would be ours and ours alone.
We finished the beautiful ceremony and walked slowly to his car. I was trembling. I remember that much. When we arrived at his place our trembling had increased to shaking. I felt like it was my first time. He took me by the hand and led me into the house, my new home.
“No pressure.” He whispered the words. “Whenever you’re ready.” He didn’t push me, he didn’t pressure me and I felt the urge to hyperventilate again.
“Why does this feel so different?” I asked the question, not really understanding the question, much less the answer.
“I don’t know, but it feels different,” he agreed with me.
I looked at him, his eyes were wide, he was taking in the sight of me, breathing deeply like it was overwhelming him as well. I couldn’t tell you how he was feeling at that moment, but I can say that it made me feel a little better to see him just as uncomfortable as I was there.
“Sacred, almost,” I explained
“Exactly.” He nodded. I leaned closer, my lips brushing his cheek. “What was that for?”
“Just because I love you,” I whispered in his ear and he held me close.
“I love you too.” He told me the truth.
I knew it was the truth because I had seen his heroism. He loved me in a way that I would never truly be able to explain; in a way that only one person could love another. He wanted to keep me close, he would give his life for me and I would give my life for him. We’ve already proven that. Our relationship felt destined somehow, but I hesitate to actually call it that. Fate cannot be changed, cannot be improved or destroyed.
We ended up in bed later that night and it was one of the most exquisite nights in existence. We belonged in each other’s arms and we belonged together. He held me as we mated, officially, for the first time. He held my body while I writhed in pleasure underneath him, twisting and turning and clawing at his back. He touched me in intimate places, running his fingers up and down my body. The fingers felt like a thousand dancing feet on my skin.
I loved to feel him, embracing me, hot arms wrapping around me. I needed him and he needed me. We didn’t say anything that time, the sacred moment that we shared seemed to last an eternity. He needed me, that thought brought me deep comfort. I needed him, he knew that, I didn’t have to tell him, but I made a note to tell him every anyway. I was driving him as crazy as he was driving me, and fell afterwards into an exhausted heap, sleeping in each other’s arms.
THE END
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