Chances Are (15 page)

Her mother's clipped tone told her plenty. She was trying to keep her feelings in check. She'd always done that whenever what she was dealing with was overwhelming or painful. She'd told Niyah once, if she kept a lid on her brewing emotions she had a better chance of settling them within herself rather than risk overflowing and burning everyone in her path.

Obviously something was brewing.

“Mind if I follow you guys around?” she asked Jason.

“Sure, come on.”

 

Niyah kept an eagle eye on Garrett: how he talked with the girls, how he coaxed them into being open and relaxed, how he worked the equipment. But most of all, she watched the dynamics between him and her mother each time they had to interact.

Her mother was more reserved than she'd ever seen her while Garrett talked with her about the program and her goals. But it was when Dione knew Garrett wasn't watching that Niyah saw the truth.

The way her mother's expression softened, and her eyes picked up the light. Her mother really liked him, but she was doing a good job of hiding it.

“That's about it for today,” Garrett said, shutting off the camera. “Thanks.”

Dione got up from the couch in the visiting room, said her good-byes and walked out. Niyah watched Garrett's gaze follow Dione until she was out of sight.

 

“Is the temp here yet?” Dione asked Brenda when she'd returned to the office.

“Just got here. She's with Betsy doing rounds.”

“Great.”

It was always so difficult to get help during the holiday season to cover for staff who wanted to be with their families. With the house being a twenty-four hour operation, someone had to be on duty at all times. The agency they'd been using since opening had been wonderful in providing reliable help to fill the staffing gap. And even though Betsy lived on-site in her own apartment, she'd spent every holiday with Dione and Niyah for the past eighteen years.

Betsy and the temp appeared in the doorway.

“Here you are,” Betsy said, breathing a bit hard. “This is Christine Long. She's going to work the holiday shift.”

Dione extended her hand. “Dione Williams. Welcome and thanks. I'm sure Betsy filled you in on everything.”

“Yes, she did,” Christine said in a slight West Indian accent.

“Things are usually pretty quiet for Thanksgiving. The girls generally get together and cook one big meal, which they'll have downstairs. Any problems or questions, my number is in the Rolodex. I'll be by sometime on Thursday.”

“I'm sure everything will be fine.”

“Okay, folks. Have a great holiday. Betsy, I'm parked out front.”

“Be out in a minute. Just have to get my bag.”

“I'll help you, Ms. Betsy,” Niyah offered and followed Betsy out.

“Bren.” Dione walked around the desk and gave her a hug. “Have a good one, girl.”

“You, too. I mean that. Just relax and enjoy yourself, Dee. You deserve it.”

“I don't know about all that, but I'll try.”

“All ready,” Niyah announced from the doorway.

“Christine, remember, any problems, call,” Dione reminded her.

“I will.”

 

It was just like old times, in Dione's Hollywood kitchen, only better. They weren't all squeezed into a small, cramped space. They didn't have to battle bugs and the cold. And they were together, laughing, joking, cooking and making a mess.

This was family, Dione thought as she watched Niyah teasing Betsy while she patiently tried to show her daughter the proper way to knead dough for the pies.

There was joy on their faces, a genuine love. Betsy had been the grandmother Niyah never had the opportunity to have, and the mother Dione missed.

She should tell Niyah the truth about what happened to her when her parents found out she was pregnant—how they wanted no part of her, or her child; how they never answered her letters, or her calls and had eventually changed their phone number.

Niyah believed that her grandparents had died before she was born and Ms. Betsy had taken them in. She'd tried to give Niyah everything in her power as if it would somehow make up for the voids in her life.

Looking at her now, she was happy with the results.

 

Thanksgiving morning her apartment was filled with the scents of baking turkey, collard greens boiling in the huge pot, baked macaroni oozing with three kinds of cheese and Betsy's favorite: apple pie.

“Smells like a real feast for a king,” Betsy said as she ambled into the kitchen. “Plenty of queens. Too bad there's no king.”

Dione cut her a look. “Why don't you say what's on your mind, Betsy.”

“All I'm saying is it would be nice to have a man around to say the blessing today. I'd like to see you settled and happy, Dee. I see how you are around that Garrett fellow. Holidays are a time to put bad feelings aside.

“He doesn't celebrate holidays,” she tossed out, not meeting Betsy's stare.

“Maybe he never had anyone to share them with, or had anyone who cared enough about him to make him a part of things. You just want to see what you want to see,” she mused. “Somebody who doesn't see eye-to-eye with you about that place is dismissed.”

“Betsy, please—”

“No. You listen. For all your degrees and training, it's so easy for you to help others, but you can't ever see clear enough to help yourself.

“You spent the past few years of your life dedicating it to those girls, before that it was Niyah. But someone I know in my heart could be special and important to you, you won't give the same energy. And you know why? I'll tell you why, because in the long run it just might make you happy. And you still don't think you deserve it, that you should steal some happiness for yourself. You can't make up for the past by reconstructing everyone else's life. You got to work on you first. I keep telling you that. I've seen how he is with those girls. He treats them decent and with respect, no matter what other feelings he may have. And I see how he looks at you when he thinks you're not paying attention. It's not the look of someone who doesn't have some feelings for you. He's a decent man, Dione. A good man at heart. I feel it in my bones just as sure as I can feel a storm coming. If you worked on him half as hard as you work on those girls, you just might discover you've found a gem.”

She turned and walked away, leaving Dione to her thoughts.

Sitting in her bedroom, with the morning moving toward afternoon, Betsy's words echoed in her head. She'd been staring at the phone contemplating calling Garrett.

She knew Betsy was right, and Terri and Niyah. Every single word. Somewhere deep inside she didn't believe she deserved to be truly happy. That to be happy would be a slap in the face to the shame she was made to feel, that had become engraved in her, a part of who she was.

So she lived vicariously through the joy of others, the success of her daughter, of the girls who came under her care.

Holidays are a time to put bad feelings aside,
the voice of Betsy whispered.

 

Garrett sat alone in his apartment, the televised football game watching him. Would it have really been so bad to spend Thanksgiving with Dione and her daughter? He took a long swallow of beer.

True, holidays had always been a difficult time for him all his life. Whatever foster or group home he found himself in, he always felt as if he didn't belong.

Holidays were a time for family and he didn't have one. Never did. He had no clue about his roots, what magical genes went into making him who he was.

He was nobody.

He didn't want to go through the rest of his life feeling that way. But he'd been afraid of what opening himself up to feeling would cost him.

He took another swallow of beer. Maybe that's just the way things were.

When his phone rang, he started to ignore it. He was only on his first beer of the day and he had every intention of getting drunk.

But the phone kept ringing. Finally he snatched it up and couldn't have been more stunned.

“I hope I'm not disturbing you,” Dione said, trying to slow down the racing of her pulse with deep, silent breaths.

He sat up from his slouched position. “No. Not at all. I was—just watching the football game.”

“Oh.”

Silence.

“So—how is your day going?” he asked needing to keep her on the line.

“Hectic. But we've just about finished with preparations. We were going to sit down to dinner in about an hour or so, and—I was hoping you'd reconsider and join us.” There she'd said it. Put it out there. It was up to him now.

The static vibrations popped back and forth between them.

“I'd need some time to spruce myself up,” he said. “You know how it is just hanging around the house. I could be there in about an hour.”

“Then we'll wait until you get here.”

 

Garrett had been in Dione's for a mere five minutes and there was no doubt that he was welcomed.

Niyah entertained them with hilarious stories about her professors at Howard and the array of scandal in Washington.

Betsy treated him like a long-lost son, waiting on him hand and foot and he was loving every minute of it.

And Dione, what could he say about her? She was as regal as a queen at court. A vision to watch and he could see that she was in her element surrounded by love. Her face glowed and her smiles to him, small touches and whispered words of conspiracy about Niyah and Betsy all made him feel that this was the best decision he'd made in a long time.

It took all he had to keep the tremor out of his voice when they all sat down at the table, joined hands and Dione asked him to say the blessing.

Dinner was something he'd only imagined, seen on television, believed that it could only be for someone else. And here he was. The atmosphere was filled with laughter, lip smacking and the sounds of silver hitting china.

This is what he'd been missing.

 

Niyah insisted on doing her one last good deed before she returned to school, so she cleaned the kitchen and packed away all the food, while Dione, Betsy and Garrett relaxed in the living room.

Before long Betsy claimed fatigue and disappeared into the bedroom she shared with Niyah.

“Can I get you anything?” Dione asked.

“Please. No. I'll explode.” He looked at her and laughed. “Dinner was great.” He paused a moment. “It was better than great. And I want to thank you for giving me a second chance.”

Dione looked down at her folded hands. “Everyone deserves a second chance,” she said softly.

He stretched his arm along the back of the couch and draped it around her, easing her close to his side.

She rested her head against his shoulder and shut her eyes, allowing herself to simply enjoy the moment, accept the sensation of joy.

Yes, everyone did deserve a second chance, she thought sinking deeper into the comfort of Garrett's embrace.

Even her.

 

All too soon the day was coming to an end and she'd promised Christine that she'd stop by. Besides she wanted to check on the girls.

“I'll take you,” Garrett offered, when she told him what she needed to do. “And no, you don't have to drive your own car so that it will be easier. I'll bring you back, too.”

She laughed and looked forward to spending some secluded time with him. “If you insist,” she teased.

 

Niyah and Betsy walked them to the door.

“Hope you had a good time,” Betsy said with a wink.

“I certainly did.” He kissed her cheek.

“Maybe you'll join us for Christmas,” Niyah suggested.

Garrett looked at Dione. “We'll see. But thanks for the offer.”

Niyah reached up and kissed his cheek. “You make her happy,” she whispered in his ear before moving away.

Their gazes connected and she gave him a soft smile of encouragement.

“I should be back in about an hour,” Dione said, slipping into her coat.

“We won't wait up,” Betsy said with a yawn and turned away, heading back to the bedroom.

Dione smiled and shook her head, feeling as if she were being sent out on her first date.

By the time they arrived at Chances Are, everyone was pretty much settled down for the evening. She checked in with Christine who confirmed that everything was fine, and she'd be turning in soon herself.

“Is there anything you need?”

“No. Betsy showed me where everything is in her apartment. And I brought my own personal items.”

“Great.” She turned to Garrett. “I just want to say hello to everyone then I'll be ready to go.”