Chaos (21 page)

“All right, Shane. If you need anything though, just say
so.” Jordan couldn’t imagine how much his brother had to hurt.

“I’ll call. Thanks for coming, Jordan.”

“Sure,” Jordan hesitated at the door. “Shane, I love you big
brother. Thanks for not getting killed.”

“I love you too. And there’s no way I’m letting myself get
killed. Not now when life is just starting to get so interesting.”

“Hmm, we’ll have to talk about that comment,” Jordan raised
an eyebrow. “But we’ll have plenty of time over the next few weeks so get some
rest. I’ll be back later.”

Alyssa walked out of the airport, still feeling as numb as
she did when she had entered it nine hours earlier. The cause was different.
Currently, she was lost in thought, rehashing the things Shane had said. The
panic that kept surging through her was only marginally better than the one
that had resulted from Brett’s call the evening before. She had to put his
words out of her mind before she made herself crazy. It was the drugs talking
about what he wanted, not Shane speaking specifically to and about her. She
knew he didn’t mean it. Why, then, did her heart race every time she replayed
his words in her mind?

“Alyssa, over here,” Chris shouted through the open window
of the SUV.

“Oh. Hi, Chris.” Alyssa shook her head to clear her
thoughts. “Where is everybody?”

“At the motel. We’re staying put today, so I figured Murray
could use a day with his father out of the car. No weather talk permitted until
after supper. How’s your guy?”

“Fine. Shane’s not my guy though.”

“Yeah, right. Any girl would dash off in a flash like you
did for someone she’s not involved with, just because he was hurt while he was
working. I know he’s your cousin’s brother-in-law but that’s not really enough
to be considered close family. I’ve watched your face when he calls and I saw
you when your friend called to tell you about him.”

“I’m so confused,” Alyssa sighed heavily. Maybe it would
help to talk to someone who wasn’t involved. “We hated each other for a year.
We couldn’t speak without arguing. Then Kiley hooked up with his brother and we
were forced into each other’s company. I remember I was dancing with him at
their reception because Kiles made us and then an hour later we were still dancing.
Do you mind my talking about this?”

Chris squeezed her arm before pulling out of the airport.
“You go right ahead. I thought you might need to, which is another reason I
came to get you alone. From what you’ve told us and his brother’s radio show,
it feels like I almost know him.”

“Thanks,” Alyssa said gratefully. “Okay, so we were dancing
and arguing quietly so Kiley wouldn’t notice and the next thing I knew he was
kissing me. Let me tell you, Chris, that man can kiss! I never felt so
overwhelmed by just a kiss before. He was incredible. Before I knew it, I was
in his bed, having sex that was better than anything I ever imagined.”

“The look on your face is from more than good sex,” Chris
commented when Alyssa paused.

“I know. We ended up spending the weekend together. I
learned that McKade isn’t what I thought he was. He is as arrogant as he was
when I met him but it’s not the same kind of arrogance as I assumed. It’s more
like extreme confidence from being sure of himself and his abilities than it is
from being egotistical and pompous. He’s a bit of a perfectionist when it comes
to himself and he’s even more capable than he gives himself credit for. He’s
got a terrific sense of humor. He cooks like a dream and enjoys it. He knows
all sorts of unexpected things like essential oils and aromatherapy. He gives a
heavenly massage. We spent a day in my studio and he let me pose him however I
wanted. Every shot was good. Then, he helped print some of the photos and
caught on faster than anyone I ever worked with. I have some with me if you
want to see them.”

“I’d love to.” Chris was mentally shaking her head. Whether
or not Alyssa was willing to admit it, this Shane was much more than her
cousin’s brother-in-law.

“We both agreed we were just having some fun together. We’d
enjoy each other until the heat between us cooled and then we’d work on being
friends so it wasn’t awkward at the family gatherings when we bumped into each
other. I don’t know what happened and when it changed but it did. He’s a truly
good guy. He cares about people. You heard about his kitten search with the
little girl but it’s more than that. You saw my book on the gang. There is a
kid who has started talking to McKade. The Kid’s not very old and he shouldn’t
be involved. McKade is trying to get him to ask for his help so he can get him
away from there. And he will too, if the Kid ever asks him to.”

Chris caught the expression on Alyssa’s face. “What is it?”

“Well, all McKade told me about what happened was that he
was in the wrong place at the wrong time. I’m afraid the Kid was part of it.”

“Wouldn’t he tell you?”

“Not if something bad happened.”

“Then we’re going to stop at the mall and see if there’s an
internet cafe. We’ll check out the articles and see if we can find out anything
more for you.”

“Could we?”

“Sure. I know there’s one between us and the motel. We
should be almost there. Alyssa, Shane sounds important to you.”

“He is, I guess. He kind of amazes me, the way he knows me
so well.”

“I bet you haven’t admitted that to him.”

“No.”

“Why not? I mean, if he’s such a great guy…”

“That’s the thing, he is a great guy. But I’m not looking
for a permanent guy. Not at this point in my life. He says he wants to find a
career woman to settle down and have a family with. He was telling me how he’ll
stay home with the kids and be there to pamper his wife when she gets home from
work. We’ve been teasing about it. But then last night, McKade told me that the
career woman he has in mind was me. He said he loved me and that he was going
to find us a house near Kiley’s. He said he was going to marry me someday.”

“What did you say to that?”

“Well that’s the thing. I think it was the drugs they gave
him talking. He couldn’t possibly mean it. I mean, that’s not the sort of
relationship we have. I just let him talk because I didn’t want to argue and
upset him.”

“So you didn’t agree or disagree?”

“That’s it exactly. He made me promise to wake him before I
left this morning. When I did, he acted like he did before I started this
assignment. I don’t think he even remembers the things he said last night.”

“You want him to though, don’t you?”

“I don’t know. He’s grown on me over the past few weeks but
love? Marriage? Kids? A house in a quiet little town? Even if I did have the
studio he talked about, I’m not sure I want all that. Not at this stage of my
life anyway.”

“But what about Shane? I mean, Shane personally, the guy who
knows you so well and suits you physically? Do you want him?”

“No. Yes. I don’t know. I don’t want to give him up to some
other woman but I don’t know if I can be what he wants right now.”

“Then I suggest you spend the next few weeks while you’re
with us giving all this some serious consideration. I think the drugs may have
loosened his tongue but I doubt if any man would say those things without
meaning them on some level. It’s not like he was lying to try to coax you into
bed at the time. Even if you’re not ready now, he may be willing to give you
time if you say you want to end up with him eventually.”

“But…”

“I’m not saying you should lead him on. Just don’t toss him
away before you’re sure he’s not what you want. Be as honest and open with him
as you can the next time he brings it up. If he’s as decent a guy as you say he
is, I’m sure he’ll be willing to discuss it with you. Don’t throw away a guy
who may be the best thing in your life just because he realized the potential
you have together before you did.” Chris hoped she wasn’t being too blunt. She
truly liked Alyssa but was already aware of how stubborn she could be.

* * * * *

Chris tugged Alyssa with her, urging her out of the mall and
to a bench as far away from the doors as she could find. She had to get her as
secluded as possible, knowing the photographer needed as much privacy as a
public place could allow. When they were finally seated, Chris pulled Alyssa to
her and rocked her, much the same as she did when her son, Murray, was sobbing.
She encouraged Alyssa not to hold back, hoping to have enough emotions drain so
the girl could speak about the article they read.

Alyssa’s tears slowed to a sniffle. “Thanks.” She accepted
the tissues Chris pressed in her hand. “I…”

“Take your time.” Chris rubbed her back, offering comfort
when there were no words available. “We don’t have to be anywhere today.”

“That’s why he wouldn’t tell me anything,” Alyssa’s mind was
still reeling. “The Kid shot him, I know it.”

“Alyssa…” Chris wasn’t sure what to say.

“He kept telling me they were going to initiate him fully
soon. McKade explained that he meant he was going to have to kill someone to
secure his place in the gang.”

“Do you think your friend is the one…”

“No!” Alyssa cried vehemently. “He would never shoot anyone
in the back, even if the Kid did just shoot him. He’s not like that.”

“It said the Kid died during surgery. Maybe Shane didn’t
know when you were there.”

“That has to be it. He would have waited for the outcome
before he told me anything,” Alyssa concluded. “Oh God, this is horrible.”

“I’m sure he’ll tell you everything next time you speak with
him.”

“I don’t think so. He knows how much the Kid got to me. He
won’t do that on the phone. He’ll avoid it until we’re together if I let him.”

“Aren’t you going to ask him? Aren’t you going to tell him
that you know?”

“I can’t. Not over the phone. McKade’s the kind of guy who’s
going to beat himself up over this. He had the Kid promise to stay alive while
I was away. He was trying to talk the Kid out of the gang for me. If he knows,
it must be tearing him up.” Alyssa wasn’t sure who she hurt more for.

“Why don’t you do back home for a few weeks? You can catch
up with us later,” Chris suggested.

“No. I’m here. I need to finish this.” Alyssa struggled to
pull herself together. “I’d be too stressed, running back and forth. I’ll be
okay. It was just a shock.”

“I can imagine. It’s been a rough stretch since you got the
call last night. Your nerves must be about shot.”

“It’s too much. I just need some time. Let’s go back to the
motel. Maybe Murray can distract me with one of his stories.”

“I’m sure he’d love to tell you one.” Chris smiled at the
thought of her son’s enthusiasm when someone asked him to demonstrate his
imagination. “He was pestering Brian to play with him in the pool when I left.”

“Why don’t you let me watch him this afternoon? You and your
husband could spend some time alone. I’ve noticed you haven’t had much
opportunity since I joined you,” Alyssa offered, desperately wanting something
to keep her from dwelling on her own problems.

Chris hesitated. “He’s a handful when he has free time. I’m
not sure if you’re really up for that.”

“Please, Chris? It’s exactly what I need today. Since we’re
not moving today, I’ll have too much time to think. You’d be doing me a
tremendous favor if you let him fill up the rest of the day for me.” Alyssa was
practically begging.

“All right but we won’t go far. Promise you’ll call us if he
overwhelms you.”

“I promise but I’m sure I won’t have to. Chris, thanks for
letting me fall apart like that.”

“No need. And if you want to talk more, I’m available. We
can always put Murray with someone else for a few hours, whenever the urge
strikes. It’s nice to have a woman to talk with. I mean, one who’s not totally
focused on the sky.”

“Then I’m glad I’m here too. And that offer to talk goes
both ways, if you ever need an ear.” Alyssa was surprised at how comfortable
she felt with her employer. Maybe it was all the emotions that Shane had
stirred up since they started spending time together. She certainly seemed to
be more open than she had been before him. That was a good thing, wasn’t it?
Kiley would be pleased if she managed to keep it up once she got home. Thinking
of going home captured Alyssa’s attention until they pulled into the motel.
Thank goodness Chris was letting her use Murray to keep her from becoming as
morose as she knew she would if she were left on her own all afternoon. She’d
deal with the night later. After that, she’d take it one day at a time until
she went home and faced Shane with the knowledge of the Kid’s death and after
his involvement in Shane’s injury.

Ignoring his nurse’s protests, Shane was on his way to see
Flynn. Jesse had charmed her into letting him bring Shane upstairs so he could
be there when the boy woke up. Shane’s parents were waiting in the hall. He
would introduce them after he had a few private words with Flynn.

“Hey there, Flynn, how are you feeling?” Shane asked when
the boy’s eyes flickered open. He looked so young without the tough expression
he usually wore plastered on his face.

“Stoned. I can’t feel a thing,” Flynn replied as a frown
appeared. “Am I paralyzed?”

“No, they just don’t want you to move yet. The doctor
assured me that you’ll be as good as new in no time. In fact, he said you’ll
probably be completely healed before I am. Something about age and resiliency.”

“Okay. Good. You okay?”

“I’m fine. Don’t worry about me. Look, I know you’re still a
little out of it but we need to talk.” Flynn’s expression changed to panic.
“Nothing bad. Just some options you need to consider in the next few weeks.
Flynn, don’t get upset. We’re in this together. I promised and I’ll never break
my word to you. We just need to kick around some details.”

“Okay.” Flynn looked doubtful.

“First, I want you to know that I will do whatever you
decide. This is entirely your call.” Flynn nodded slowly. “Well, here goes
then. We need to define our future relationship. As I see it we have several
choices. The first option I think is completely unacceptable but, in all
fairness, I have to present it to you anyway. You can go back to your dad.”

“No! If you make me, I won’t stay!”

“Calm down, Flynn. I said it wasn’t really a choice. All
right, here’s option two. I can become your legal guardian. That means I’m
responsible for you until you’re eighteen. After that, I have no say in your
life unless you invite me to.”

Flynn was still frowning. “That’s it?”

“Nope. There’s a third possibility and, let me assure you,
it’s the one I sincerely hope you choose. Now remember, this is your choice
entirely. No pressure, no matter what. All I ask is that you think about it
before you answer. If you’ll let me, I will adopt you. You would become my son
in all ways except biologically. You’d be stuck with me for life, even when
you’re all grown up and independent and perfectly capable of taking care of
yourself.”

“Adopt me?” Flynn sounded stunned.

“Yes, adopt you. I’d like you to become my son. Before you
make your decision though, I should tell you that I intend to ask Campini to
marry me when she gets home.”

“You’re stoned! That’s crazy. Be your kid. She won’t marry
you if you’re saddled with me.”

“Then she’s not the woman I think she is. Listen, please. I
promised you I would get you out of the city and make your life safer. I don’t
want to give you back to your family. I don’t want to turn you over to social
services where you’d get stuck in a system that I don’t believe would benefit
you. I thought something clicked between us when we talked. Was I mistaken? I
want you with me. I want it legal so you know no one is going to show up one
day and force you into the life you thought you’d left behind. Whether the legal
status is as your guardian or as your family is up to you. I assure you that I
intend to treat you as mine, regardless of your choice.” Shane realized that he
was holding his breath and exhaled. “Flynn, just think about it. I don’t want
an answer now. It’s a big decision and you shouldn’t rush into making it.”

“You’re fucking serious!”

“Very. I want you to be my family. I want to know that, no
matter what comes up in the future, we have each other to depend on. I want to
add Campini to our lives permanently if she’s willing to accept us. If she
does, you should know that we might have kids together someday. But, if we do,
you will always be my oldest son. That will never change.”

“Holy shit!” Flynn couldn’t quite believe what he was
hearing. The guy he was told to kill a few hours earlier was actually inviting
him to be his kid. And he’d just said that he was planning on asking Alyssa to
join them. He also sounded as if he was putting a messed up kid before the
woman he wanted to marry.

“Okay, I’ll take that to mean you’ll think about it. We’ll
talk more about this once we’re both out of here.” Shane couldn’t tell what he
was thinking. “Next, I need you to meet my parents. We’re going to stay with
them the next week or so. After that, I’m going to have to come back here and
tie up some loose ends so I can get out of here.”

“What about me?”

“I want you to stay there, with them. It’ll only be for a
little while. I thought, if you don’t mind, that I’d find us a place to live
near my brother. It’s a great little town. It seems like a good place for a kid
to grow up.”

“I’m not a kid.”

“You’re right. In many ways, you’re not. I’d like to change
some of that if I can. I know there are things you’ve seen and done that no one
should have to live with. But, in other ways, you are still a kid. I’ll expect
you to go to school, like any other eleven-year-old.”

“But I haven’t gone in over a year.”

“We have the rest of the summer. I know some great people
near my parents’ who will help if we asked them to. You’re smart. If you decide
to work at it, I’m sure you’ll have no problem getting caught up. All I’d
expect is for you to try your best.”

“You’re really quitting?”

“Yep. I told you before, lots of times. I’m frustrated and I
don’t think I can do the job I was hired to do. It’s time to get out before I
become part of the problem. Don’t worry though. I’ll get a job. I checked out
the town and I already have some ideas.”

“You’re going to leave me,” Flynn accused.

“Just temporarily and with my parents, not strangers. Flynn,
trust me. They will take care of you just like they did me and my brother when
we were kids. Give them a chance. Not all grandparents are like yours. I’ll be
with you at the beginning. I promise, I won’t leave you there any longer than
is absolutely necessary. You know I can’t bring you back to the city with me.
As far as everyone here knows, you died in surgery last night. We can’t take a
chance of anyone seeing you.”

“I don’t know.”

“Just meet them,” Shane urged. “I can’t stay here with you,
no matter how much I want to. My parents can keep you company. They’ll tell you
stories of me, Jordan and Brett growing up if you asked them to.”

“I guess,” Flynn agreed. He was too tired to argue and
thinking was becoming a chore. He could always go to sleep and ignore them
until Shane came back.

Shane brought his parents into the room. “Flynn, these are
my parents. Mom, Dad, this is the young man I told you about.”

Rose wheeled her son out of her way and slid a chair next to
the boy’s bed. She could see how suspicious he was, even through the pain
medicine they were pumping into him. “Nice to meet you, Flynn. My son tells me
you’re quite a character. I’m looking forward to getting to know you.”

“Uh, hey, Mrs. McKade,” Flynn muttered.

“Listen to you! Such a polite boy. There’s no need to be so
formal. Rose will do for me and this is Danny.”

“Hello, son,” Danny joined in. “I hear you and Shane are
coming for a visit. It’ll be good to have boys around the house again.”

Flynn couldn’t restrain himself. This man sounded like he
was talking about kids, not a grown man and a total fuck up. He started to
giggle.

Shane laughed with him. “See what I mean? No matter how old
the rest of the world thinks I am, these two will always be my parents and I
will always be their son.”

“That’s right, young man and don’t you forget it,” Rose
scolded, making Flynn laugh even harder. “Isn’t it time for you to be getting
back to bed? That nurse wasn’t happy about you being out of it in the first
place, so may I suggest you scoot back to your room?”

“Mom!”

“Don’t argue with your mother,” Danny spoke up. “We’ll look
after your young friend for you. Go on, Shane. He’ll be fine with us.”

“You cool with this?” Shane asked, knowing he had no real
choice.

“Yeah, whatever.” Flynn shrugged, unsure of the people who
spoke to this big, tough guy like he was a little boy.

“I’ll be back as soon as I can,” Shane assured him.

“You’ll do what the nurses tell you,” his mother declared in
a tone that showed she wouldn’t put up with any arguments. “Get some sleep,
son. We’ll visit with you later, when Flynn takes a nap.”

* * * * *

Jesse waited until Shane was settled back in his room before
he spoke. “I got a call a little while ago. From Frank. In Germany.”

Shane tensed, waiting for bad news. “Frank went himself?
And?”

“He found Corporal Roberts and arranged a private meeting.
When Frank explained why he was there, Roberts seemed surprised that Flynn
still existed. He made some remarks about the boy’s mother and grabbed for the
paper that Frank had with him. He kept asking if signing it meant that he’d
finally be rid of that mistake, as he called him. He demanded that Frank make
it clear that he wanted no contact from Flynn or anyone who has anything to do
with him in the future.”

“How can he be like that?” Shane was furious and relieved
all at the same time. “What the hell is wrong with him? Why doesn’t he see what
he’s so quick to toss away?”

“Some people are like that, Shane. As I see it, you should
be glad that he’s such an asshole. His signature gives you one less obstacle.
He also signed the consent form requesting that you be appointed as Flynn’s
guardian. Apparently, he questioned Frank about your mental stability when
Frank told him you wanted Flynn.”

“I told Flynn that I wanted to adopt him.”

Jesse raised an eyebrow but didn’t comment on that
statement. “Frank’ll be back tonight. After that, all you need is the doctor’s
okay and you two can get out of here.”

“Thanks, Jesse. I can’t tell you how much I appreciate your
help with this.”

“Don’t mention it. It’s good to get a chance to do something
this positive for a change.”

“What do you do, really?”

“I work in security. And I do some investigating. On
occasion, I’ve been sent in to retrieve kidnapping victims. I test Wyatt’s
gadgets as needed. At the moment, I’m involved in breaking down a distribution
system that puts guns in the hands of street kids.”

“So that’s how you know so much about this group.”

“Partly. You understand that this is confidential?”

“You really need to ask?”

“No but I don’t usually mention this to anyone other than
Frank or Wyatt.”

“Well, you can always talk to me. Any time. About anything
without worrying that it would go any further than me.”

“I just may take you up on that some day.” Jesse fully
expected to. He understood Shane’s feelings of frustration and was beginning to
share his desire to do something more positive with his life. “You and Alyssa
have a nice visit?”

“As nice as it could be, under the circumstances. I told her
how I felt and that I wanted her to marry me eventually. I told Flynn too.”

“Hmm.” Jesse wished he could have seen Alyssa’s face.

“I don’t think she was ready to hear it yet. I think she
kept telling herself that I didn’t know what I was saying.”

“But you gave her something to think about. Even if she
doesn’t believe you now, it’ll be in her mind. Damn, Shane. I’m amazed. You get
shot and are ending up with one hell of a woman, a son and a whole new life.
You’ve had quite a day.”

“You really think they’ll both say yes?”

“Without a doubt. It’s only a matter of time. You’re as
charmed as your brother is, maybe more.”

“Hardly. If this works out the way I’m hoping, it’ll be
pure, dumb luck. I wonder how Flynn’s getting on with Mom and Dad?”

“I wouldn’t worry about that. Your parents are great.
They’ll get him to see that not all people are bad in no time.”

“I really am lucky, aren’t I?” Shane asked with wonder as
the shot he had been given started to take effect.

“Extremely,” Jesse agreed. “Get some rest. I hear you might
be able to leave with Flynn tomorrow.”

“I hope so. I hate the thought of him being on his own. I
know Mom and Dad would take turns, staying with him but I want to be there.”

“I’m sure he’ll be happier with you around too. If you’re
not released, I’ll have you transferred with him. You could probably be in the
same room then, unless you expect some of your friends to visit.”

“I wouldn’t think so, since they’ve all been in today. I
didn’t tell Jordan and Kiley about this yet.”

“Are you going to?”

“I want to talk to Campini first. I don’t want her to be the
last to find out. Mom and Dad said they’d help run interference for us. I hope
she comes home soon.”

“For your sake, so do I. I’ll stop in later. Call me if you
need anything.” Jesse left, needing to catch some much needed sleep himself.