Chaos (25 page)

She merely stared at me with her new, fathomless Rita Santos eyes, and I had to look away. “You abandoned all those people,” I said in a choked voice. “You left them at the mercy of evil creatures that
you
created.”

“But I didn’t abandon anyone,” she replied. “I sent Takeshi, Malachi, Ana, and you.”

I grimaced. “How does that make up for hundreds of years of suffering? How could you create those things? How could you allow them to take over like that?”

“I loved them, and so I gave them one thing,” she said quietly. “The one thing I give to creatures I love. Do you know what it is?”

“A massive dome so they could create a hell that outdoes any kind of hell I’d ever imagined? Did you gift wrap it, too?”

“No,” she said patiently. “I gave them free will.”

I looked up at the ceiling, a swirling, living mosaic of crystals, shifting and roiling like an ocean. “Well. How nice of you.”

She chuckled, sending vibrations through the floor that rattled my bones. “I wouldn’t say that. Free will makes every kind of evil possible, baby. Every single kind. Bu
t . . .
”

My eyes were drawn to hers, like they were magnetic. “Bu
t . . .
”

She smiled, and it was both joyful and sad. “Free will is also the thing that makes love real.”

She loved the Mazikin, and she’d wanted them to love her back. But they’d chosen something else—a shot at power, the chance to shed her authority and make their own rules. All because she’d loved them enough to give them a choice.

“Do
I
have a choice?” I asked.

“There’s always a choice,” she replied. “But that doesn’t mean you get to determine which options you have.”

“In other words, all the options are shitty.” I was smart enough not to ask for the Countryside, for Malachi, for freedom.

“You can apply any term you like.”

“And you already know what I’ll choose.”

She raised an eyebrow. “Does that really matter?”

Did it? I was too tired to think, but I knew I couldn’t just curl up in a ball and abandon every person in the land of the living who was in danger because Juri and his Mazikin were still on the loose. I didn’t have it in me to walk away from them. “Send me now,” I said.
Before I fall apart.

She leaned in, filling me with this jittery sense of unease, like I was about to be struck by lightning. “Fight hard,” she whispered.

I always do,
I was about to say, but I was jarred into silence as my vision turned black.

When it returned, I was in the living room of the Guard house in Warwick. Henry lay crumpled on the carpet in front of me, sleeping or maybe unconscious. I rubbed my stinging eyes, took a breath, and immediately began to cough as a wave of heat rolled over me.

The curtains, the furniture, the wall
s . . .
everything was on fire.

TWENTY-SIX

I
CROUCHED, GATHERING
H
ENRY’S
lean body in my arms, and squinted out the front windows. A group of people stood on the front lawn, lit by the glow of the fire, making them easy to see even though it was dark out. And as one of them dropped to all fours and loped across the grass, I knew exactly who they were and what they’d done. With all of Malachi’s knowledge in his head, Juri had known where and when to strike.

“Henry,” I said between coughs, shaking him. “Come on,
please
!”

He stirred weakly as the flames crawled toward the ceiling. I hooked my arms beneath his and drew him along the hallway toward the rear of the house, which opened onto a wooded area, behind which was another neighborhood. The smoke was thick, making it nearly impossible to breathe. I was unarmed, and all our weapons were in the basement. And I knew what waited for us outside. Juri wanted to lure us out and end us for good.

I paused in the hallway outside the kitchen as a crash near the front door told me the house was starting to come down. If I tried to get to the basement, it might collapse on my head. Instead, I darted into the kitchen and grabbed two steak knives. I was still wearing my stained leather clothes, so I jammed the knives into two empty sheaths and lunged for Henry as the ceiling began to rain bits of ash and debris. As the cinders burned holes in our clothes, I heaved his arm over my shoulder and wrenched him up, putting my arm around his waist and limping down the hall toward the back door. Henry’s feet were moving, but he was pretty out of it. He wouldn’t be much help once we got outside, and that meant I was about to have a knife fight on the lawn. In the middle of Warwick, Rhode Island, where my probation officer would love nothing more than to see me brought up on a murder charge. Killing Mazikin had completely different and very serious consequences in the land of the living.

I never thought I’d miss the Shadowlands, but there I was.

My lungs burning, I reached the cramped mudroom and peered through one of the cloudy glass panes in the back door. I didn’t see anyone. My fingertips skimmed over the handle of the steak knife at my belt. “You and me, Henry. It’s up to us,” I said in his ear.

“Captain?” he wheezed.

“Yeah. I’m back.”

“Didn’t expect that,” he said, his voice so weak that I clutched him tighter, my fingers against his bony chest.

“We’re going out the back, and we may have to fight.”

He tried to raise his head, but it seemed too heavy for him. “Can’t.”

His voice was saturated with exhaustion and pain, and I understood it well—so I wracked my brain for how to motivate him. And it hit me: Sascha. I remembered who he was. That Guard from the Wasteland was Henry’s soul mate. “I saw Sascha, Henry. Outside the Mazikin city.”

He started to lift his head. “Sascha?”

“Earn your way back to him, Henry. We have a mission, and I need you.”

His fingers tightened over mine. “Give me a weapon.”

I handed him one of the steak knives. “All I have at the moment.”

“More than enough.” He leaned on me, still wheezing.

I shoved open the back door. “Through the woods. Then we get onto the street, where people can see us.” Fear of getting caught worked both ways. Juri was too smart to get himself thrown in jail.

We limped rapidly down the steps as a siren howled in the distance. My ears alert for any sound of footsteps behind us, I half dragged Henry onto the back lawn and headed for the woods beyond it—the thick late-spring foliage that would help us to hide.

A low chuckle reached me, even over the wail of the fire engines as they rumbled up the street. I looked over my shoulder.

Juri stood in the backyard, leaning against a tree, gorgeous in the firelight. His face was unscarred, his back straight, his arms crossed over his chest. He looked completely relaxed. His black-brown gaze was so familiar, so intent. “I missed you, Lela,” he said, his eyes lingering on my body.

Rage exploded through me—not just because of who he was, but because he’d reopened the deepest wound I had by looking and sounding so much like Malachi. “Fuck you, Juri,” I yelled as the red lights of the fire trucks flashed at the front of the house. Shouts from the firefighters didn’t sound scared, so that told me the Mazikin in the yard had probably fled already. “If you came for a fight, let’s go.”

Henry leaned away and braced his hands on his thighs, giving me freedom of movement in case Juri charged. I drew my knife.

Juri smirked. “Not yet. I’m not ready for this to end.” He took a few lazy steps away from the tree, his gaze never leaving my face. “See you at school, my love.” In a scary-quick move, he sank into the billowing smoke of the side yard.

“The rest could be anywhere.” Henry pulled on the back of my tunic, and it was enough to get me moving again. Juri’s words rang in my mind as we staggered into the stretch of woods and out the other side, into a neighborhood that was nice enough for the residents to call the police if they saw two homeless-looking folks stumbling around in their gardens.

“Where to?” Henry asked.

I had no idea. We scrambled between two fences. I tripped over a recycling bin, sending bottles and cans clinking and rolling. A light in the house next door came on. “Anywhere but here.”

Henry’s breath was labored, and his face was blackened with soot, but his steps were a bit steadier as he sucked in the clean air. “My phone is in my pocket,” he rasped, then doubled over, coughing and retching as his lungs worked hard to get rid of all the smoke he’d inhaled.

I led him along a driveway and onto the street, knowing we needed to get out of here or risk getting questioned by police. Security lights clicked on as we walked up the road. I fished Henry’s phone from his pants pocket.

With my eyes closed, I visualized the number that had popped up several times on my own phone, one I’d rarely called. I punched it in and hoped for the best.

“Hello?” said a sleepy voice.

“Tegan. It’s Lela.”

“What the hell? Where have you been? And why are you—?”

“Can you come get me? I’m near your house.” I read off the street name, knowing that her parents’ huge property was less than half a mile away, down near the bay.

She groaned. “Fine. But where the hell have you been? I mean, I know you have stuff going on, but skipping town for a week isn’t exactly—”

“A week?” When I’d been to the dark city, I’d come back only a few hours later, even though it had felt like I’d been gone for a month. “Are you sure?”

“Are you drunk?”

“Can you just come get me?” I pleaded as another set of lights came on and someone stepped onto their front porch. From the silhouette, it looked like the person was holding a phone to his ear. Shit.

“Yeah, yeah. Hang on. I’ll be there in a few minutes.”

I closed my eyes in relief. The last time I’d been with Tegan, she’d seen Juri kill Jim right in front of her. Raphael had taken those memories from her, promising it would spare her the pain, but mostly to keep her from talking about what she’d seen and blowing our mission. I’d wondered what Raphael had left her with. But whatever she knew, it wasn’t stopping her from coming to the rescue.

I told her the intersection where we’d be waiting and prayed that no one would try to stop us. My muscles were screaming with fatigue. The last time I’d had a moment of rest had been before we’d destroyed the portal. Those few hours of healing, in that bed with Malachi. His hands on my skin. His mouth on mine. His arms around me. The weight and scent of him. All of it rose up and threatened to drag me under. Only Henry’s scarecrow body leaning against me kept me in the now.

We moved slowly along the sidewalk, no longer running but still alert. “So. I’ve been gone a week?”

Henry nodded. “I lay low. Guarded your friends. Then Juri showed up at the house.”

I had to wonder if Juri had done it because of what he’d seen in the portal. He’d known I was in the Mazikin realm, and he might even know the portal had been destroyed. Had he guessed I would return?

“You came back alone,” Henry said hoarsely.

Alone. My chest ached, the empty space filling up with hurt. “Yeah. He’s okay, though.” Henry and Malachi had become friends, and I knew Henry admired him. He also understood what Malachi meant to me. “I got him out of there, Henry. He’s in the Countryside, where he belongs.”

It was all I’d wanted for him. I’d been willing to become a Guard because I thought it meant he’d be free, and now he was. Sure, he wouldn’t get his ordinary human life, but he’d have something better. He’d have heaven. Maybe he’d find his family. Maybe he’d be with his brother. No more fighting. No more dying or killing. Only sunlight and rest. It should have made me happy, but instead I had to blink back tears. It should have given me hope, but all I wanted to do was lie down on the ground and sleep forever.

Now Henry was almost holding
me
up. “So we’re back to trying to stop them here. Just the two of us.” A hint of bitterness had crept into his raspy voice.

I nodded. “But they can’t multiply anymore. We destroyed their portal, so the ones here are the last ones, and they’re stuck. They can’t get back without risking permanent death, and they can’t bring any more in.”

He chuckled. “That is a fairly significant development, Captain.”

I looked up the road as we reached the intersection. “The Judge said there are still eleven of them here, including Juri. Once we terminate them, that’s it.”

His eyes met mine. “That’s it. I wonder what happens after that.”

I was saved from answering as Tegan’s little BMW pulled up at the curb. Her window slid down, and she recoiled at the sight of us.

“I am the best friend ever,” she said, popping the locks.

Against my will, I smiled. Tegan was annoying and ignorant, but I kind of liked her. I opened the back door and helped Henry inside, then got in the front seat. Her nose wrinkled. “Jeez. You stink. Like you’ve been at a barbecue hosted by skunks.”

“Or in a house fire,” I muttered, glancing over at her.

Tegan’s short brown hair was sticking up, like she’d rolled out of bed. She looked in the backseat. “Hey, Henry. You look like shit.”

He laughed and then coughed a few times. “I know. Thanks for picking us up.”

I looked back and forth between them, and Tegan patted my leg. “Henry’s my stalker.” She didn’t say it in a freaked-out way, though.

Henry rubbed a grimy hand over his face, which only made it more evenly filthy. “She’s more perceptive than I figured. She als
o . . .
”

“Henry drove me home after Jim ditched me,” Tegan said, her voice changing, becoming tight and strained. “I was too messed up to realize Henry was probably a serial killer. But he hasn’t slaughtered me yet.”

I gave Henry a tight-lipped glare. In his ordinary human life, he pretty much
had
been a serial killer. The only difference was he’d gotten paid.

Henry smiled, and I realized he kind of liked Tegan, too.

“Anyway,” she continued, “when a few creeps cornered me outside the mall a few days ago, Henry ran them off. We have an understanding.”

“As Jim’s
uncle
,” Henry said, “it was the least I could do after my nephew took off. He ran with a rough crowd, and I felt responsible.”

Tegan pulled up to her property and punched in the security code. As the metal gates swung open, I looked across the rolling lawn. Malachi had been here the night we went to prom. That meant Juri knew it was her house.

“How much security do you have around this place?” I asked.

Tegan snorted. “Considering that my dad defends some of the most unsavory characters in the state, I’d sa
y . . .
a lot. He’s kind of paranoid.”

Perfect.

She followed a narrow roadway around the back of the mansion. “You can spend the night in the carriage house,” she said. “If you don’t want to go home to Diane, that is.”

Diane. Before I could ask, Henry leaned forward and said, “She’s fine, Lela. She’s okay.”

“Pretty upset, though,” added Tegan. “She’s called me several times, wanting to know if I’ve seen you. She’s afraid yours might be one of the bodies in that club that burned. I was, too, until Henry told me you were just hiding out for a while. I had no idea you were trying to escape from a gang, Lela. You could have told me.”

I hadn’t known myself, but it seemed a pretty good cover. “Um. Yeah. My past is sort o
f . . .
yeah. But now I don’t want anything to do with them.” I rubbed my eyes. I needed to rise from the dead and let Diane know I was okay. But I knew that was going to be a pretty intense experience, and right now, all I wanted to do was sleep. “I’ll go see Diane tomorrow. She’s probably at work right now.” Ironically, she might be safer down at the medium-security prison than she was in her own home.

We got out of the car, and Tegan unlocked the carriage house, which was about the size of Diane’s regular house. She flicked on the lights in the entryway and pointed up the stairs. “There are three bedrooms up there. I’ll bring you guys some clothes. Lel
a . . .
” She seemed to notice my outfit for the first time. “What the hell are you wearing?”

She narrowed her eyes and came toward me, reaching out to touch my goatskin tunic. I stepped back into the shadows as she said, “Is that a knife? Is this a costume, or have you lost your mind?”

“Ah, Tegan, I would love some regular clothes, though I don’t think your pants would fit me.” Tegan was built like a pixie, and I was a bit mor
e . . .
more
.

She waved her hand. “I’ll bet my mom has stuff. I’ll bring it over tomorrow. I’m going back to bed.”

She walked toward the door and then turned to me again. “Lela, are you okay?” she asked quietly. “You loo
k . . .
different.”

Because I’m done,
I wanted to say.
I’m running on empty and I’m afraid it’s not going to be enough.
“I’m all right.” I forced the words out. “It’s just been a hard week.”

Her brow furrowed. “See you tomorrow?” She didn’t sound sure at all.