Charcoal Tears (5 page)

My initial trepidation upon seeing the photographs returned tenfold, and I skipped to the next folded page:
Goosey Goosey Gander
. This time two lines were circled.

I took him by the leg,

And threw him down the stairs.

The next marked page was
Jack and Jill
, and before even reading the lines, I instinctively knew which ones would be circled.

Jack fell down,

And broke his crown,

And Jill came tumbling after
.

It was clear that the note had something to do with Noah and Cabe, as they were included in every single picture, but what did the messenger want exactly? Did they expect me to stop talking to the two boys, or were they trying to warn me about something? Or… perhaps more importantly…
why did they care
? I shoved everything into the envelope and grabbed a blanket, moving back to Tariq’s room. He had finished eating, and was snoring softly. I shut his door, locked it, and slid onto the end of his bed. He grumbled something, kicked at me and then shot up into a sitting position, his sleep-tousled hair matted to one side of his face.

“Seph?”

I didn’t answer, and he hovered there for a moment. The tears were rolling silently down my cheeks, and he touched a palm to the side of my face. I screwed my eyes shut, and he watched me for a moment more before falling back. He threw his own blanket over me, fit a pillow beneath my head, and went back to sleep.

Tariq was an amazingly simple person.

In the morning he didn’t wake me up until the last possible minute, and when he did, he shoved a handful of clothes at me and pushed me toward the bathroom. I brushed my teeth, combed my hair and slid on the cotton shirt and pleated black skirt. It was a little nicer than what I usually wore, but I didn’t have time to change again. We both crept through the door and I left a twenty on the counter for Gerald. Hopefully he would buy food with it.

The drive to school was quieter than usual, and I knew that Tariq wanted to question me, but he held it in. He reached over and squeezed my hand after we parked, and then slid out of the car, hurrying off. I sat there, staring at the dash until a knock on the window startled me; Cabe smiled down at me.

“You coming in?” His voice was muffled.

I pushed the door open and moved to retrieve my bag, but Noah was leaning against the passenger door. He opened it, slung my bag over his shoulder and began to stride toward the building entrance. Cabe coaxed my keys from me, locked the car, and walked after him. It took me a few moments to catch up to them, and they fell into place on either side of me again. I suddenly felt like the pictures stuffed into my bag were going to burn a hole through the material and spill out onto the corridor. I swallowed back my fear and tucked my hands against my sides, unsettled by the brush of their arms against mine. The other kids all stared at us, looking from the boys to me, and back again. Someone wolf-whistled and called my name. I almost tripped over, but Noah snarled something at them, and I managed to collect myself.

“They think you’re new, like us,” Cabe said with a deep tone of amusement.

I huffed out a breath—a reaction that seemed to amuse Noah. They followed me to homeroom and then Noah disappeared. We took our seats and a blond girl perched on the edge of Cabe’s desk.

“Hey.” She smiled at him. “I had fun last weekend.”

She slid me a look, smirking, and my eyes went wide, something catching in my throat. Why did I feel like her words had been somehow aimed at me?

“Off my desk, Kat.” Cabe sounded annoyed. “You know it was a one-time deal, don’t try and pull this shit.”

Her smirk melted into a fierce look, dark with anger, and this time it was definitely aimed at me. I shrank back against my chair and she flounced off his desk, moving to the other side of the room. I was a little surprised, as I had pegged Cabe as an almost too-nice kind of guy. Not the kind to brush off a one-night stand so harshly. He fixed his eyes to the front, pulling out a notebook and doodling in it. Mr. Thomas lectured away about appropriate uniforms and Cabe’s notebook slid onto my desk.

You look like you haven’t slept
.

I winced and pushed away the notebook. He blinked back, surprised by my reaction and then leaned forward, dropping an arm over the back of my chair.

“I wasn’t trying to insult you. You just look tired.” His whisper caressed my neck, and my vision of the front of the classroom blurred as the scratchy feeling spread over my neck.

“I’m fine,” I whispered back, inexplicable panic rising in my throat. “It was a late night.”

His hand fell over my knee, squeezed once, and then he straightened away from me. Across the room, Kat looked like she was about to throw her desk at me. I let out a hard breath and waited for the class to end. Noah leaned against the wall outside as we exited the room, and I wondered how he had managed to get there so quickly. He was in my next two classes, even though I was pretty sure that I’d had history the day before and he hadn’t been in it then. When he sat beside me, everyone stared. Lunchtime couldn’t come soon enough.

Retreating to my corner table with Matthew was a breath of fresh air, but everyone was still staring. Whispers scattered across the cafeteria, and Matthew shifted in his seat, his eyes flicking up and around, landing on me, going back to his iPad, and repeating the process. Eventually, he set the iPad down.

“Why is everyone staring?” His voice was a squeak. I felt bad for him.

“I’m not sure.” It was only half of the truth, but I wasn’t about to say anything about the strange new boys and their awkward attachment to me.

I suddenly wished that the silent stranger from work were here. Not only would I be able to talk about what was happening without worrying about his judgement, but he’d also frighten everyone else so much that they’d stop staring. I looked over to where Cabe and Noah sat. They were bent together, excluding everyone around them from their whispers. Cabe glanced up, caught me watching, and motioned me over. Matthew’s head snapped back to me, his mouth falling open.

“What was that?” he asked.

I coloured, staring down at my hands. When I looked up again, Noah was watching as well. He made the same motion, and I forced myself to my feet, persuading my stiff limbs to walk me over the expanse of the room without tripping. Heads turned as I passed, and Noah ordered the person on his left to move. The whole row shifted down, and Noah caught my arm, pulling me down onto the seat between himself and Cabe. It was uncomfortable, trying to swing my legs over in the skirt I wore. As soon as I was seated, they both moved close to me again.

“Who’s the friend?” a boy asked from across the table, eyes on me.

“No one,” Noah said lightly.

“Seph,” I corrected, needing to clear my throat to work past the nervousness.

The boy tilted his head, his eyes running over my features. “I feel like I’ve seen you before.”

I shrugged and turned, bumping Cabe’s arm. He leaned down so that I could speak in his ear without the others hearing.

“What am I doing here?”

“Having lunch with us?” He answered my question with another question, and as he pushed something into my hands, my reply died.

I held a chicken wrap, still warm. I started to eat, and was already halfway through before I paused. I looked up and spotted Tariq across the cafeteria, shooting me confused glances. I stood, feeling that the stares were worse now, but I forced my head up. It was easier to ignore them this time. I crossed to Tariq and handed him the rest of the wrap. Pink rose high in his cheeks, but he accepted it without protest.

“Hey, Seraph,” one of his friends said, smiling at me.

I shot a questioning look at Tariq and he shrugged, seeming almost guilty.

“Hey,” I replied.

“Harry,” he provided.

“Right.” I paused. “Bye, Tariq. Bye, Harry.”

I started to turn away, but someone grabbed my arm. Across the room Noah rose from his seat. I turned to face a redheaded boy. He had a cheeky smile in place.

He said, “You forgot me.”

“I have no idea who you are.”

He feigned a hurt expression and Tariq kicked him under the table. “Stop flirting with my sister, Reggie.”

Reggie slid his hand down to my wrist. “What if she likes it?”

“She doesn’t,” Noah said, suddenly beside me.

Reggie released me immediately, his eyes flashing with what I recognised as fear. He edged further down his booth seat, away from me. “Hey, no problem, I was just messing around.”

Noah grabbed my hand and pulled me away from the table. Tariq stared at us until I was forced to turn so that I didn’t trip over trying to walk backwards. I sat down again between Cabe and Noah, and Cabe started prompting people back into conversation, drawing their attention away from me.

I sat there numbly, and I was sure that I wasn’t even blinking. It took too long for me to regain control of my faculties.

Who are you
? I thought as I stared at the side of Noah’s profile.
What do you want with me?

Instead, I said, “That wasn’t necessary. Please don’t do it again.”

3

Call Me Daddy

Noah rolled an apple into my lap halfway through lunch and I accepted it without complaint, despite the fact that he had merely grunted at my reprimand earlier. I munched slowly as people talked around me, my thoughts occupied. Noah was as quiet as I was, but at least he didn’t look as bored as he had the day before. When the bell rang, they walked with me to art class, and I froze before my easel, something niggling at me. Yesterday I had rolled up my last painting and put it in my bag, but I hadn’t seen it since. I pulled my bag into my lap and searched it just in case, but it was really gone. Frowning, I grabbed a pencil and started to scribble. I didn’t pay attention to what I was drawing, as my mind was simply too caught up on other things, but when I smelled the blend of wooded citrus and something airy that was unique to Quillan, I tensed and pulled back. I had drawn the stairs to my house, leading to the bedrooms on the second landing, except that these stairs were twisted with frightening shadows, the balustrades curved with menacing intent. The base of the stairs was littered with money, colourless outlines scattered into haphazard piles of coins and scrunched-up notes. At the top stood a shadowy figure, broad shoulders hunched.

As Quillan looked on from behind me I reached up and tore away the paper. I started again and he walked away silently.

My last class for the day was music and I was hunched over the piano bench, pressing keys idly as Mrs. Reynolds tried to decide which group to put Cabe and Noah in, since they had only just transferred to the class and we had already paired off for our projects. I wasn’t surprised when they came over to my piano. I was the only one without a partner. Mrs. Reynolds had given me the option of being in a group of three or being by myself. No doubt, Cabe had used his silver-tongued charm on her to reverse my decision.

“Do you play?” Cabe asked, sitting on the stool beside me.

“Nope,” I said, pressing a few more keys.

He laughed. “You picked the wrong instrument then. What do you play?”

“Nothing,” I admitted. “I just like the sound.”

“Noah is a maestro,” Cabe said, earning a glare from his brother. “A moody one,” he corrected, “but a maestro all the same.”

“How are you two related?” I blurted out.

They both looked at me. Cabe was the one to answer, but his voice had lowered. “We’re only half-brothers. No need to spread it around.”

Yeah, right, because I have so many friends to gossip with
.

“So you’re talking today?” Noah nudged us both from the bench.

“I guess.” I stood up, watching as his fingers stroked the keys in a delicate melody, almost too soft to be heard over the other instruments in the room. Cabe was right; he was very talented. Maybe their continued forced presence around me was beginning to make me more comfortable with them.

“Ready to tell us why you didn’t jump out of the way of my car?” Noah asked, still focussed on the keys.

“Is that why you two won’t leave me alone? You want to know why I have slow reflexes?”

Cabe huffed, dropping an arm over my shoulders, his hand nudging until I was facing him. “You want us to leave you alone?”

I opened my mouth to answer, but thought about the pictures on my bed and the note that had accompanied them. Noah stopped playing, and I felt him stand behind me. He tapped on my shoulder, forcing me to face him. His stormy eyes caught mine, trying to pull the words from me as he had in the cafeteria the day before.

“Answer Cabe,” he said softly.

It was too much. They were both too much. “No,” I said reflexively.

“No what?” Cabe poked me.

“You don’t have to leave me alone.”
But maybe you should
.

Noah’s eyes glimmered, his mouth hooked up into a grin and he stepped back to the piano. I turned to catch Cabe’s wide smile. None of it made sense. The more time they spent with me, the closer to them I felt. It was true; I
didn’t
want them to leave me alone. The scratchy feeling, while not entirely pleasant, was transforming into something frighteningly addictive. It had passed the barrier of my skin and it now traversed my insides, wiggling about and settling into my nerve endings, jolting me to life.