Charis (24 page)

Adrian and Simon were in partnership together in an IT company they’d
started and were based in Winchester. Adrian and his family lived on the
outskirts of Bishop's Waltham in a large 1930's house they’d bought a few years
ago and were well settled there. Jennifer and David would be living in London
and were actually going to live in Charis' St. John's Wood house. It had been
empty for several weeks and when Charis found out they were getting married she’d
offered it to them rent free. All that she required was that they pay the
council taxes. As places to rent in London were very expensive, they had gratefully
accepted her offer.

The obvious ones to come to live at Willow Bend were Simon and
Lorraine with their new baby, as Charles was a vet and he and Amelia had the
free use of a small flat attached to the surgery in Romsey, where Amelia taught
at a nearby village Church of England primary school. It wouldn't do forever,
but it suited them well for now. It gave Emily and Giles something to think
about anyway, and as Giles had said, they had plenty of time. The decision
didn't have to be made immediately.

*****

Time marched on and soon April was over and they were into May. The
spring had been beautiful in the south of England that year and Ben and Charis'
little garden looked glorious, full of colour and the perfume of the lilac bush
flowering early that year, filled the air. Down in Hampshire, at Willow Bend,
Simon, Lorraine and Joshua had moved in with Emily and Giles. They'd had some
modifying done so that each had their own space; a front door, kitchen, living
room, bedrooms and bathroom. Emily was able to dote on her newest grandson and
it seemed to be working out well.

May meant that Ben and Charis were approaching their first wedding
anniversary. For Charis it seemed incredible that the year had gone by so fast,
but it also seemed that she and Ben had been part of each other forever. Time
was such an amazing thing.

Ben arrived home one evening and announced, “Well, I've managed to
get time off for our anniversary, just the Friday before the long weekend and
then the Tuesday, so we have five days and I've booked a hotel in Keswick.”

Charis squealed with excitement, “Oh, Ben, how wonderful! Thank you,”
and threw herself into his awaiting arms.

“If that's the kind of reaction I get to surprise holidays,” he
said, “I can see I'll have to make more such arrangements,” as he gave her a
big hug in return.

It was exam time at the Music Academy and that meant Charis was busy
with last minute tutoring.  She had several of her students sitting for important
exams so the time passed quickly. By the time the term ended there were only a
few more days before they were heading off to the Lake District.  She spent the
time cleaning and packing and getting organised for their holiday. They’d both
been very busy over the past few weeks. It seemed as though they hadn’t had
much time together, and these few days away were very important to them both -
breathing space; Ben, because he was going to be busy when they got home again.
Helen's TV show was resuming and he was booked for another six-week stint. It
no longer bothered him, but as his regular work load didn't diminish at all, it
meant that he had to work extra hours to fit in all his patients. Needless to
say, they were eagerly anticipating their five days of precious time together.

They left very early on Friday, to beat the early morning rush hour,
and headed to Oxford where they wandered around the beautiful university
buildings for a couple of hours. This was where Charis should have gone after
finishing school, but because of Mildred, her plans had suddenly changed.

“Are you still sorry you didn't get to come here?” Ben asked as they
walked hand in hand.

“No, not really,” she replied wistfully. “Sometimes I think little
what
if
thoughts, but then I remember how I met you and the
what if
becomes
what if I hadn't met Ben again?
And, I'm really glad now that I
decided to take up music as a second choice, although I think it should’ve been
my first choice all along. So, no. I'm not sorry I didn't come here after all.
But I do love this city, don't you?”

“Yes, I do. The buildings are so evocative of a different era, and
seem to
breathe
learning,” Ben agreed.

They stayed for a little longer, enjoying their time there, before
heading north again.

Their next stop was Kenilworth. Neither of them had been there
before. They liked the town and loved the castle and all the history that went
with it. As they didn't need to be in Keswick until late, they took their time
exploring the castle ruins and visiting the Gate House before continuing their
journey.

It was already dark when they arrived at their B&B, Ben giving
silent thanks for the Sat Nav equipment in the car or they probably would’ve
become hopelessly lost, this part of England being completely new to them both.
But they’d arrived safely and tired, but very happy. Once settled in their
room, they discovered they weren't quite as tired as they thought after all.

They spent three whole days exploring the area; they found the house
her father had lived in as a child; they walked through the little town of
Keswick; they took a ride on a boat around Derwentwater, sitting at the front
and getting splashed with spray from the lake, laughing and wiping the water
from each other’s faces. Then they travelled further afield, visiting some of
the other lakes, and walking some of the fells, things Charis was sure her
father had done in his childhood. She felt very close to him here and wished he
could’ve been with them to show them around this place that he’d loved so much.
It was all very picturesque; green and lush and rural. 

 And all too soon the time was gone. It was time to go home. Home! Her
home with Ben - this wonderful man who was her husband. Her husband for a whole
year now and what a glorious year it had been. How happy he’d made her. How
happy they’d been together. So many things had happened to them; lots of happy
times, lots of good things, one or two not so good, even a couple of dark times,
all wonderful memories of family and friends forming a patchwork quilt of their
first year together, the first year of their ‘Happily Ever After’.

Her husband, her prince, her love, her life, her hope, her dreams,
her world, her everything.

PART VIII

HOME AGAIN

She could hear Ben's voice through her pain
but it sounded as if it was coming from miles away.  The pain engulfed her…searing
her as though it were tearing her in half. She bit her lip desperately trying
not to cry out. And then it eased and Ben was beside her,

“You're doing great,” he said. “Not long now, just a few more big
pushes and he'll be here.”

He sat beside her, his hand gently on her tummy until he could feel
the next contraction. He’d been wonderful with her; holding her and massaging
her back, talking softly to her, encouraging her and doing everything he could
to ease her pain through the hours she’d been in labour.

“Push now,” he said. “Push as hard as you can,” as he moved to bring
their son into the world. “One more push. That's all it will take. You can do
it,” he encouraged her.

Gathering all that remained of her strength, Charis pushed and
suddenly it was all over. Relief flooded over her. Ben held their baby boy for
just a few seconds, looking at the perfectly formed features. What a beautiful,
healthy baby they had produced. Then he placed the tiny bundle in her arms and
for a few minutes they sat together, filled with joy and love for each other
and for this precious baby. Returning to his professional role, he moved away
to complete the things he had to do as the attending doctor before calling his
mother to come for the baby and take care of what needed to be done.

In a previous life, before she’d married her Arab prince, Emily had
trained as a nurse at one of London's leading hospitals, and they’d asked her
to come and assist. She’d been waiting with Giles in the sitting room, waiting
to hear the baby's first cry…waiting to know that all was well. 

For months Charis had been afraid that she’d die…felt
certain
she would die, and was tormented by the thought of her baby growing up without
a mother. Ben had constantly assured her that everything was going well. “You're
doing brilliantly,” he’d told her, “And our baby is perfect.”

He’d wanted Frank Norris to take care of her and book her into the
hospital for the birth, but Charis had refused. “My mother died in a hospital,”
she told him. “I won't go there. I want you to take care of me and I want to
have our baby at home.”  And she became so distressed each time they’d spoken
about it that he’d eventually given in to her, but only on the understanding
that Frank or Graham were available and standing by in case of an emergency. An
ambulance could be at the house within five minutes.

In just a short time Emily was back in their bedroom with her newest
grandson cleaned and wrapped and she gently handed him to Charis who gazed in
wonder at this child she and Ben had made together. She looked up at her
husband with such love in her eyes and smiled, “He is so beautiful,” as she
caressed the little cheek and held the tiny finger. “I can't find words to say
how I'm feeling right now.”

Ben sat on the bed beside her. “It’s a miracle that never ceases to
amaze me. But this is
so
different from all the hundreds of other babies
I’ve delivered. You’re wonderful. I love you more than I can ever express.” He
kissed her very tenderly.

“Now, you need to let Mum get you freshened up. I'll take young Paul
to meet his grandfather.”

And he took their baby in his arms and carried him from the room.

*****

From the time they knew it was to be a boy, Ben had suggested Charis
might like to call him Paul, after her father, and she wanted to include Ben's
name, so they planned on naming him Paul Benjamin and had thought of him as
such for several months. Ben's study had been moved to one of the spare
bedrooms upstairs so that his former study could be used as a nursery for the
baby, even though Ben's dressing area would be left there. Charis thought it
sweet that the men in her family were already learning to share. Everything was
ready to welcome little Paul into their home. Charis had been worried at the
beginning of her pregnancy because the first time she had become pregnant she’d
lost the baby very early on. She hardly had time to know she was to have a
child before it was over. Ben had whisked her off to St. Anne's to make sure
that everything was alright. She was home again within a few hours, still
groggy from the anaesthetic but remembered Graham's parting advice. “Now my
children, no sex for at least twenty-four hours,” grinning as he said it.

Ben was cross with him. “You really do have your mind in the gutter
sometimes Graham,” he told him.

But the next day as they were sitting quietly together on the sofa,
Charis had been watching the time, and at three o'clock she looked up at him
and almost in a whisper she said, “It's three o'clock.”

“Yes.”

“Well?”

“Well what?”

“It's been twenty-four hours.”

“Is that supposed to mean something?”

“Graham said twenty-four hours.”

“You heard that? I thought you were more asleep than awake. If he's
not careful I shall put that man's name on my little list,” referring to the
'little list' they’d discussed when they first met.

“But I
do
want to get pregnant again,” she told him.

“Not so soon,” he replied. “Your body needs to recover from the
trauma you've just gone through. No trying for another baby just yet. And I
think we'll wait for at least another twenty-four hours before we do anything
like unto it. In fact, all
my
patients would be told to wait at least a
week.”  He put his arms around her and held close. “We'll have babies, I
promise you,” he’d said. “All in good time.”

Now they had Paul and he was perfect. Her fear of childbirth was behind
her, at least for the time being. Losing her first baby had given Charis an
even greater fear that she may die, but her sorrow from the baby dying she
thought was possibly even worse. 
Rather me than our baby
, she’d told
herself.

Emily washed Charis and dressed her in a clean nightgown and Ben
brought the baby back to her arms, sat on the side of the bed and looked at his
wife and new little son and silently gave thanks for the safe arrival of Paul…for
his little family. He felt very blessed.

*****

Charis had her miscarriage six weeks before their second wedding
anniversary. To celebrate their anniversary, and to keep her mind occupied with
something else, Ben planned a trip to the north of England and Scotland. He’d
been to Scotland before but Charis hadn’t. He was able to take some time off
work, so this time they had a full weeks’ holiday and a long weekend - ten days
in all.

First they drove through the Peak District where they stayed at a
B&B way out in the countryside.  They explored a few of the picturesque
villages before heading north again, through Yorkshire and the Yorkshire Dales,
stopping at Fountains Abbey, then into County Durham and into the city of Durham
itself. They fell in love with the old city, with its cobbled streets and
historic Cathedral, before they continued north into Northumberland. Up the
coast by the North Sea, to Hadrian's Wall, Alnwick Castle, the Farne Islands,
and Lindisfarne and finally into Scotland, spending each night at a local
B&B. They visited Jedburgh which had associations with Mary, Queen of Scots,
and the old ruined abbey and then on to Edinburgh where they spent three wonderful
days exploring the city and being regular tourists. Charis thought they should
come back when the Military Tattoo was on at the castle. She’d seen it on TV
several times and longed to see it in person. “Maybe next year,” she’d
suggested. 

All too soon it was time to return home to London. But by then both
Charis and Ben had a greater appreciation of their beautiful country and
decided that one day, when they had more time, they would explore it more
fully.

Ben still continued with his appearances on Helen's ‘Woman's World’.
The show ran for three months, twice a year, and in each series he was on once
a week for six weeks. It no longer bothered him, but he’d still rather not be
doing it at all. He felt it kept him from doing his more important job, caring
for his patients, although he'd had great opportunities to give valuable advice
to many women and he hoped he’d made some contribution to them taking better
care of their health. He’d been invited to attend a medical conference in New
York and to present some of his findings about high risk pregnancies, which was
more and more becoming his specialty. So he’d gone and taken Charis with him.
They’d spent several days there where he'd received positive reaction to his
report. They enjoyed some leisure time, seeing the sights and taking in a
Broadway show, and shopping for little gifts to take back to family and
friends.

As far as she knew, Henry was still away on some archaeological
expedition and although he was out of the country thoughts of him would
infiltrate her mind at the most inopportune times upsetting and worrying her. She
dropped a glass in the sink when she closed her eyes and saw his face. Constantly
looking over her shoulder when she left the house was becoming harder and harder
to explain to Ben. David had said that most of the time these things never
escalated and were nothing to worry about. She tried to take comfort in his words
but it wasn’t easy. She kept her fears to herself and prayed mightily that
Henry would forget her.

At the beginning of August Ben arrived home from work, told her he
had a surprise for her, took a small package out of his briefcase, and handed
it to her. “Open it,” he said, anticipation in his eyes.

Inside she found airline tickets, confirmation of 2 nights’
accommodation in a first class hotel and tickets to the Edinburgh Military
Tattoo. The date? Her birthday.

“Happy birthday, my love,” he grinned. “I know it's a little early
for birthday wishes, but I thought you might like to have a couple of weeks to
plan.”

“Oh, Ben! How can I ever thank you?” she exclaimed as she threw her
arms around his neck and gave him a big hug. “You are so kind and so good to
me.”

“You can thank me tonight when we go to bed,” he said as he returned
her embrace. “But right now I'm hungry. What's for dinner?”

By October Charis knew she was pregnant again. This time she felt positively
nauseous, not just in the mornings but all day long. She hadn't felt that way
in her first short pregnancy and Ben said that some would say it was a good
sign.

“Like many of the old wives’ tales, it may even be true,” he said.
“But don’t worry…I'll take very good care of you.” And he had. The sickness
gradually eased but never completely disappeared. She gave up teaching at the
Music Academy so she could rest more, but apart from that life continued on
without much changing. She continued to work in her little garden, she and Ben
still went for walks by the river or in the park. They occasionally went to a
West End show or to the ballet or a concert. Family members came to visit, or
friends came to dinner, or they would go and visit friends. They saw a lot of
Jennifer and David, but also Tim and Janet, and James and Helen. They had
occasional visits to Hampshire to spend weekends with Emily and Giles, who in
turn came up to London to visit them. Sometimes Ben would text her from work and
tell her not to start dinner because he was taking her out for the evening, but
most nights she cooked for them at home. Ben always made her relax after dinner
while he cleaned up in the kitchen and put the dishes in the dishwasher, then
they'd sit together on the sofa until it was time for bed. Charis found that being
pregnant did not affect her desire for Ben and their physical love for each
other continued unabated.  As she got bigger, and the baby inside her began to
move around, she noticed that Ben became more gentle and tender with her and
more considerate with everything he did. He was a wonderful husband and she
knew he would make a wonderful father.

Most of the time she managed to remain optimistic through her
pregnancy, as she desperately wanted to have children…a family…but sometimes
the fear of dying in childbirth gripped her, her mother and grandmother both
dead after giving birth. What if it happened to her too? Ben said she was well.
He said there was nothing that would happen that he couldn't handle. She was
healthy and the baby was healthy so she mustn't worry. And she tried not to, she
really did, but every once in a while fear would rear its ugly head and she
grieved for her child who would have to live without a mother.

Ben spent a lot of time educating her about what to expect when the
time came for her to give birth to their baby. She’d witnessed a birth before,
on the plane coming home from Cairo, but obviously
having
a baby was
very different from watching someone else, so he went through it with her
several times hoping that understanding what was happening to her body would
help ease her fear.

She’d wondered how Ben felt when they discovered they were going to
have a boy. He’d made such a big thing of wanting “little girls who looked just
like their mother”, so she’d asked him about it.

“My darling girl,” he said. “I already have the most beautiful girl
in the world as my wife, and yes, it's true that I would love to have a
daughter, or daughters, someday, who look just like their mother. But if we
never have any it will be okay with me. Even if we’d never been able to have
any
children it would still be okay with me. As long as I have you I am the
happiest man alive.”