Authors: Maya James
The
safer we all think we are, the more danger we're in.
Killing
John had been hard on her, more than she had expected, more than she had
admitted it to anyone other than me. Charity was an angry woman, a dangerous
thing as John found out, but she's no killer. She didn't shed a single tear, he
didn't deserve one. Her body trembled for days, though. It was heartbreaking
for me not to be able to help her by taking away her pain.
That
was the last time I will ever allow her to do that. Had I been stronger, not
laying in a hospital with a security guard and a fake name, I would not have
let it happen.
I'm out
of this. I'm done. I live now only to keep Charity safe, nothing else. I'm making
sure Garrett is trained and I'm taking over the functions left open by John's
absence. Nearly the same for Lena, her role at Panther, Inc. has expanded.
Trisha is assisting her now.
We're
both out--except for finding Brian Marker.
Something
will happen soon, I can feel it. Getting rid of John was not the end. Time
hasn't healed that wound, not yet. He was with me for so long; I still can't
believe he tried to have me killed--twice!
Charity
rolls gently to one side, her beautiful face slides closer to me.
John's
wife is absolutely devastated by his disappearance. She still believes he will
show up at some point, but I can see the painful doubt beginning to seep into
her eyes. We comfort her the best that we can, it's not her fault what he did.
That's more than he deserves.
I'm
just grateful he didn't go after Charity to get to me. That may have been the
last, tiny little piece of human decency that John had. I know Marker won't be
so decent, especially if he knows that Charity pulled the trigger on John. That
makes her as dangerous as the rest of us, and fair game for him.
We have
to wait for him to make a move, poking his head out of whatever hole he's
hiding in. Arthur Shae helped us the best he could, part of the conditions of
the truce between the groups, which do not even feel like separate groups at
this point. Both sides are seeing benefits to treating this more like a merger
for now. John Roberts has most of the control. Shae told us everything he knew,
how he made contact with Marker, how he paid him, none of it led anywhere.
Marker knew better and cut all his services. So we wait.
Charity
takes another long breath. She's almost awake now. I see the rest of my life
with her clearly, and I want it.
How can
I not adore her? She's given me my mother back, and a brother I never knew.
Even though we have different fathers, and we didn't grow up together, we are
so much alike it's scary. Garrett is learning fast. He's a fucking natural, and
someone both Lena and I finally trust to take this over soon. We see the light
at the end of the tunnel--if we can live long enough to reach it.
It's
been easier getting to know Garrett than it has been to connect with my mother,
not for any reason other than that it's hard to forget the hate, even when she
doesn't deserve it at all. My mother is nervous, and so am I, each afraid to go
too fast. Charity and Garrett both have told us that slow is fine, we have a
lifetime now. Garrett, I trust with my life and Charity's, which it's huge. I
know him; I might as well have known him for years. I don't need a lifetime
getting to know him. He's my brother and he's put himself on hold right now to
help us with the group and with Marker. I know he wants to get closer to
Trisha, but he isn't doing it. Garrett insists Charity and I have to be safe
before he will focus on anything else.
My eyes
will be on Charity until this is done and she is safe. I don't want to know a
day when I can't lay next to her, full of anticipation, just to watch her eyes
open and be the first thing she sees. These moments reliving the first time I
saw her can never end; I'll make sure of that.
I don't
deserve her; she's much too beautiful. I'm smiling at her even though she can't
see me. That's how she makes me feel. She makes me happy when she doesn't even
know it or mean to.
My
hands gently grab the sheet that covers us and I slowly pull it down, exposing
her sensual neckline and soft rise toward her breasts. As usual, she has on a
white, sleeveless tank top with no bra on under it. I feel myself stir at the
sight of her nipples jutting through the fabric. It's more than a sexual
response, I feel her in my soul.
Charity's
breathing changes, and her eyes slowly blink open. She sees me and returns my
smile. I touch her lips with my finger and she puckers against it. "Good
morning, Beautiful," I whisper.
"Morning
handsome," she replies, her voice sleepy and cracked. Her angelic smile
spreads across her tired face. "You're watching me again?"
"Always,"
I reply in a heartfelt whisper.
"You're
so fucking cute," she says as she rolls even closer to me and places her
soft hand on my face. "I love you."
Holy
Christ! I just don't deserve her. She's too beautiful, too kind, and too
amazing for someone like me.
"I
love and adore you, Warrior."