Authors: Shelby C. Jacobs
I could feel my throat catching. Either he was the most sincere man I had ever seen, or he was a damned good salesman. I didn’t care. I wanted to buy whatever he was selling. “Ok, let’s go for a walk. I think the Deli’s still open. Maude makes a mean chocolate fudge sundae. I so need a sweet dessert.”
With the tension relaxed, we straightened up. I brushed my hair and put on a little lipstick and tucked in my blouse. PJ straightened his pants and shirt, and tried to smooth his hair. When we were ready, I opened the booth door to the kitchen so we could go out the back way. Halfway to the loading dock door, Ronnie stopped us.
“Where are you two going?”
He was smiling, so I knew he was teasing.
“Can I go out with PJ? Please? We’re just going up to the Deli and get Maude to fix us a chocolate sundae with whipped cream and two cherries on top.”
I had been teasing with Ronnie for twenty of my thirty-two years. When my dad left me and mom, Ronnie was right there to hold us and protect us. I always wondered if Ronnie had a thing for my mom, but he seemed to be happy as a friend to my mom, and a substitute dad for me.
“Ok, I’ll leave the light on for you. Seriously, let me know before closing if you’re going to be back, so I can lock the dock doors. Have fun.”
“He likes you.”
I said that as much for my benefit as PJ’s. It was important for me that Ronnie and Wilma approve.
Walking up the street with PJ, holding hands, seemed natural, like something we had been doing for years. I felt relaxed with him. We had gotten all the first time sexual tension out of the way, so we could be friends and not just potential bed partners. Don’t get me wrong, I still wanted him in bed! Now it was a certainty, so there was no rush.
It was easy to talk to the big guy. We talked about the weather, the Grizzles and his college team, until we arrived at the Deli. It was near closing time, but I persuaded Maude to fix us a sundae with hot fudge, nuts, whipping cream and two big cherries on top. I knew I would have to double up on my exercise to pay for the calories, but I didn’t care. Being together was all that mattered.
Randle and I used to get sundaes last thing at night. Why, did I think of that now?
PJ was not a quiet laugher. He was more the ‘har-har’ type guy, all big smile, open mouth and loud. He didn’t snicker, he belly-laughed.
“Where are you going to put that, skinny?”
“Shush, everyone doesn’t need to know!”
Between bites, he asked. “What would you like to talk about? We’ve been talking a lot about me. Why don’t we talk about you?”
“I’m not very interesting? What do you want to know?”
“Well, tell me about the Bar. How is it going?”
“We’ve been doing okay, profitable for the past six years, well … except last year was slow.” I could feel myself warming to the subject. Jimmy’s was such a big part of my life, maybe too big. “But to tell you the truth, it could be so much bigger and better.”
“Seems pretty successful now. You want to do more?”
“I want to expand into the area next door and give us more dining room space. We make great pastries, but our baking space and equipment is limited; all that needs to expand. I’ve got more ideas than I can handle now. We could play off the gangster past of the Bar, you know, tee-shirts, novels, website and so on. Ronnie wants to add a stage, and allow new artists and songwriters to come play their material. In fact I’m meeting with a group of investors next week to talk about expansion, and possibly diversify into other areas, maybe even out of State. I just need to get my banker to loosen up a little money to expand the concept, before opening another location.”
“Sounds interesting. Who are the investors? Local?
“No, some group out of New York. They have a lot of pro athletes in their group. Something like the Pro Group or the Players? Something like that.”
“Shoot! How much do you need? I have a couple of dollars in my pocket. Might even be able to get you a little more.”
“Thanks, that’s sweet. You have $500,000? No, seriously, I’ll get it from the bank. I just need to sweet talk old Shelby Loomis. He’s an old friend; he and Ronnie and Jimmy were in the army together, and were pretty tight until Jimmy was killed. They went to high school with my mom. I think Ronnie was kind of sweet on her. But that’s another story.”
“I’d like to hear more. Let’s pay up and walk off these calories.”
“Since I took over, I’ve been obsessed with growing the business. Jimmy was quite content with having a nice neighborhood bar and restaurant. But I think it has the potential to grow much bigger, and that’s what I’ve been working on. Pretty dull stuff, huh?”
“Sounds like the makings of a superwoman to me. Do you have a life outside the Bar?”
“Pretty boring to tell you the truth. You’re the most exciting thing to happen in a lot of years. Anyway, let’s talk about you. I know about the Grizzles, you told me about what’s her name. Any kids?”
Say no … please say no!
PJ paused for a few seconds. This was not a happy subject for him, and he didn’t feel comfortable talking about it. “No child that I know of, thank goodness. Like I told you, I was married for a couple of years toward the end of my stay in Memphis. Thankfully, there were no children.”
“And?”
“You know the basics,” he replied. “I learned there is more to marriage than just sex and lust. They’re a part of it of course, and can be what brings two people together, but when the sex is over, you’ve just got to love the person for who they are inside; the real person, and not their outside beauty. It took me two whole years to learn that lesson.”
“That’s the way it was with Randle and me. We met in college and were immediately attracted to each other. But gradually we learned who the other one was, and our love grew deeper. We didn’t have to fall into bed every time we saw each other. We actually talked. That was so great about us.”
“Tell me about Randle. You miss him a lot, I bet.”
“Yes I do. He was the love of my life. I could simply be me when I was with him. I didn’t have to be strong and aggressive. I really just wanted to have babies with him and grow old together. But…”
I couldn’t finish the sentence, it hurt too much.
“You haven’t dated anyone else since he passed away?”
“Oh, I’ve dated. In fact I’m dating one of the lawyers in the firm that represents the Bar. He’s not what I want. He and I both know it. Let’s just say we’re friends with benefits. Before you ask … no, I don’t know what I want. When the right man comes along, I’ll know it.” And with a laugh I blurted out. “Who knows, Coach, it might be you.”
He gave that loud hearty laugh. “You don’t strike me as someone who would settle for a dumb jock.”
“Never can tell.”
PJ, I just might surprise you!
On a whim, he then asked. “Charley, this whole night has been about your sexy dream fantasy about me. Tell me, do you have any other sexual fantasies?”
Why did he ask me that? What a strange question.
I took a few seconds to think, before I replied. “Randle and me, we used to have a weird sexual fantasy. We nearly pulled it off one night.”
“Now, you have to tell me. Don’t leave me hanging.”
“I know it sounds silly, and please don’t think I’m weird, but I always wanted to make love where there’s a good possibility of getting caught in the act. Maybe during the day on a golf course, or at a water park on a busy period, or in the men’s room at the airport, or even on a public bus or train, or on campus at a school. You know someplace public … and dangerous.”
“Dang woman, you really do have sexy ideas. Anything else?”
“Oh, and another fantasy we had was to have a lot of people making love to me at one time, or at least watching me and Randle and applauding. Weird? How’s that …?”
I felt strange telling PJ that, but he had asked. Besides it was just a fantasy between Randle and me.
“Wow, that’s some fantasy. You do a lot of sexy dreaming?”
PJ tried to be serious but he couldn’t help laughing out loud.
“I told you. In reality I lead a pretty dull life. But I am around Jimmy’s every night. You would be surprised what I see and hear. The single women seem to feel comfortable telling me of their adventures, both good and bad. I could write a bestseller about them …
‘Lust in Suburbia
… Sounds good, huh?”
“You write it and I’ll buy it.”
“Good”
“Now, tell me about you and Randle nearly fulfilling your fantasy.”
“No, I can’t, it’s embarrassing.”
PJ stopped walking and sat down on one of the street benches on Second Avenue. He pulled me down beside him and put his arm around me. I felt a good long sweet kiss coming on and I was ready.
PJ leaned over to me and whispered in my ear. “Please … pretty please.”
“You rascal, I thought you were going to kiss me. You just wanted to sweet talk me into telling you a sexy story so you could get your kicks.”
I had him dead to rights, so I just laughed at him and pushed him away. He had the biggest fake pout on his face. “Ok, one nice big sexy wet kiss and I’ll tell you.” I threw my arms around him and planted a wet one on his lips. Before he could respond, I pulled back. “It’s a long story so you’ll have to make that last.”
“I’m all ears.”
I wonder how sexy I should make this story…?
*****
“When we had been married about six or seven months, we lived in Memphis. We took a three-day weekend trip to the mountains in Northern Arkansas. It was cold, but we really didn’t expect to spend much time outside. The cabin had a separate hot tub on the private deck, so naturally we spent some time in it … naturally so to speak. On Saturday, it was freezing outside, which gave us a reason to stay inside and mess around. That evening, we decided to go out for a good steak and a few drinks. Bottom line is we wound up in a small dive in some back street around 11:30. We had a little too much to drink, and had been talking dirty and feeling each other up all evening. That’s when I came up with my fantasy of making love with an audience, or with other people all handling me everywhere.”
I could see PJ’s eyes light up, he must have been seeing himself in that dive.
“I leaned over and whispered in Randle’s ear. ‘Bet you won’t love me right here with all these people looking on. Bet you can’t get anyone to help you.’ Randle was always up for a challenge even when he wasn’t drunk.”
“He laughed and began taking my flannel shirt and jeans off. I wasn’t wearing a bra or panties so it wasn’t long before I was stark naked and giggling like a teenager. Next he stood up and loudly announced to the five men in the bar. ‘My wife wants me to love her here and now but I’m too drunk to get it up. I need some help. Who’s going to help me?’ Everyone looked up. I began turning around and showing off my obvious features; I really put on a show. The men even clapped and whistled. But no one seemed in the slightest bit interested in Randle’s offer. Not a single soul! I thought at least one of the guys would jump at the chance, but they didn’t. In fact, four of them walked out and the fifth was too drunk to get his head off the table.”
“Damn Charley, what did you do?”
“PJ … I was so embarrassed I started to cry as I put my clothes back on. When I look back on it, I don’t know whether I was crying because I realized what I had done, and was ashamed, or I was crying because no one wanted to fuck sexy little me. No one wanted me! Randle and I didn’t even do it that night.”
And so that’s the tale about my venture into fantasy land. I had been watching PJ the whole time. It was quite difficult to read his expression. At one moment he was grinning from ear to ear, and the next he had a blank look. I guess I wanted him to grab me and make love on that street bench. So much for all that sexy daydreaming.
“Sounds like you really are a sexy little girl.”
“Not any more I guess … too busy working.” I wanted to let him know I might be sexy again. I just didn’t want to be pushy about it. Damn, I couldn’t just announce. ‘Let’s make love tonight.’ But I could throw out a line and see if he’d nibble on it. I could see PJ’s eyes begin to light up. He understood my meaning. The bait is in the water.
Now, get him to take it.
“Oh?”
On cue! He’s nibbling!
“I haven’t felt like being sexy in years, just haven’t found the right guy … yet”
Move the hook away just a little, tease him more!
“Maybe we can change that.”
He’s on the hook, now reel him in!
“Maybe?”
I was having fun. I hadn’t flirted seriously in ten years at least. But I am good at it; like riding a bicycle, you never forget how!
PJ, you just might hit a home run tonight, if you don’t screw it up!
“Let’s head back to Jimmy’s.”
I stood up and headed that way. I waited for him to stand. When he did, I reached for his hand and put it around my waist. I slipped my hand under his shirt and rested it on his hip. We began the short walk back to Jimmy’s talking about nothing. We both knew what was going to happen when we got back. I was going to get my clean crisp sheets, a soft bed, dim lights, mellow music and a basket of brilliant red rose petals, and he was going to get over his fear of being intimate. I was feeling alive again, like I was twenty-two, happily married and enjoying Randle all over. I slipped my hand under PJ’s shirt and felt his muscular back. He and Randle had similar backs, smooth, hard and hairless. I loved to rub Randle’s back after he had a long day. That’s one of the ways I connected with him.
PJ was busy as well. His hand slipped lower on my hips and pulled me closer. We had to slow our pace, as our hips were touching and getting in the way. I put my hand on his hand and encouraged it to slip a little lower, until I had it right where I wanted it. PJ was cupping my butt cheeks, squeezing them and rubbing them. I kept my hand on his and found his index finger. I pressed that long boney finger between my butt cheeks and pulled it up. Randle would do that when we were out, and it was all I could do not to pull him into the women’s room and make love in one of the stalls.