Authors: Cheryl Spence
He decided he would only visit Gregory, if Christine thought it was okay. “Jules, I cannot decide for you; it would clarify your unanswered questions for all these years. You need closure on this most painful aspect of your life my darling. Plus I am sure you can ask questions about your momma and what she was like. You never know you may end up loving Gregory after all. Just in case anything God forbid happens to anyone of you. I think you should try to get to know him.” Julian smiled for the first time, “It’s like my past has caught up with me all in one day. Daniel came to the office today, he is free y’ know. Has been since three months.” Christine suddenly shuddered at the mention of Daniel. She spoke in a determined voice. “I am glad that he is free. However, I hope you did not invite him to live with us!” “I am shocked at your attitude towards Daniel, after all these years. Besides I would never offer our home to someone, without discussing it with you. You know that.” She regretted her earlier, attitude, because of the pain, her darling just endured. But Daniel rubs her the wrong way. She knew, from speaking with Julian, that Daniel hated her. He claims she was responsible for Julian, breaking his engagement to Lizzie. He has never forgiven Christine for being with Julian. So Jules should not be surprised at her attitude, towards that ingrate Daniel. “Julian, my darling this is neither the time nor place to discuss my relationship with your cousin. Besides you know why I cannot stand him.” “I am sorry, I shouldn't have yelled at you. I guess I am just overwhelmed and I took it out on you. Come I want to kiss you.” They kissed, for a few minutes, and then Christine said, “Hey, Mr. McGuire needs your answer. I will support whatever decision you make. Looks like Gregory really cared for you. Pity he did not choose to openly accept you as his son. But I think he wants to do so now.” Julian, smiled and said, “I have made my decision I will visit Gregory. I have some spare time tomorrow, please let him know I will come.” Harper sounded like he was the happiest person in the world, when he said, “Oh thank you, thank you. I think I hear angels singing. “All I know, if he had purchased you from my father, we would not have met. I can’t believe Jim was so greedy; he preyed on your father’s love for you all in the name of money. Bastard!” Julian, sighed and rubbed his nose on Christine head, then he started to smile. He softly said, “Chris, I can’t imagine life without you. God I am really glad my father did not buy me from Jim. I would never have what you call it? Gotten re-acquainted with you.” He groaned and said, “Hmm that would be so sad!” “I know, I now would be married to Paul. God I suddenly had a sickening feeling, saying that. All I know is that we are married, and our love is forever and ever.” “Yes and I am so happy for that. Harper, I hope I will not regret this, if I do I will come looking for you.” “Julian I assure you Gregory loved you then and loves you now. You won’t regret visiting him I promise.”
Chapter 11
The Meeting
Julian was stunned beyond belief, before him stood his father Gregory. Julian felt his knees losing their strength and just stood gawking at the man he hated his entire life. Seas of darkness engulfed him and he stood breathless, surprised that no words came from his month as he had planned to vent his anger and frustration at Gregory for abandoning him all those years ago. It was Gregory who broke the silence. He hesitantly spoke, as he was afraid of what Julian will say he wanted to hug and kiss his son in the worst of ways. “Julian, I am glad you came. I was afraid you would refuse and I would not have blamed you one bit. I see you are looking well.” Julian stared at his father and contemplated on leaving, he found the scene most uncomfortable and chided himself for allowing Harper to cajole him to visit Gregory. He slowly spoke, voice filled with disdain. “Why did you want to see me after all these years? You abandon me and now have the audacity to request to see me; say what you have to and then I will leave. Nothing you say can
ever
erase the hate I feel for you.” Gregory felt a pain in his chest by Julian’s harsh words; he is not surprised, as his behaviour and treatment towards his son were disgraceful and unforgivable. “Julian, I know nothing that I say can ever erase the hate you feel in your heart for me. I need you to please listen to me and maybe, perhaps one day you will see me as a human being and then eventually your father.” Julian snorted at Gregory’s high hopes, the most his father should be thankful for, is that I came and I am still here. Why I don’t know, damn Harper, I feel his has a talent of taming a savage beast with his words.
“Gregory, don’t you dare ask for my forgiveness, you have some nerve? You sold me into slavery, how cruel were you? There is
nothing
you can possible say to me, absolutely nothing!” Gregory sat on the edge of the sofa and stared at Julian, words could not describe the guilty feelings that are surfacing in his soul. My son, my son he thought. He hates me more than I expected. God I had hope Harper would have smooth things over for me. I see I have a battle on my hands. Julian is so determined not to let me in his life; I don’t blame him, as I have no rights to ask for the love and understanding of my son. “Julian, I am ever so sorry for what I did to you. There is no excuse I can offer up, only once again to say I am sorry and I promise you I will spend the rest of my life, even to my last breath trying to get your forgiveness and love. Please allow me to at least try and explain my abhorrent behaviour. Please sit.” “I am not planning to tarry; I have a wife and two darlings at home waiting for me. I only came, as I was curious, wanted to see what a half human looks like, plus Harper had said I looked just like you. I see his point, but that’s all we have in common, as I would never, ever abandon the woman I love and my children, n
ever.
” “Julian, I love you with all my heart, please believe me.” Julian arched his brows and looked at Gregory in disbelief. “Did you just say that you love me? I wonder if my hearing has suddenly eluded me. Love me. Do you even know the meaning of that word?” Lines of frustration suddenly grew on Gregory’s forehead; Julian noticed and knew another thing they both had in common, when worried lines of frustration also emerge on my forehead. Julian really looked at Gregory for the first time. Gregory was a distinguished gentleman, tall about 6’4”, with a powerful build, his eyes were deep sea blue, his dimples are as deep as mine. His hair, the parts that weren’t greying were black as coal. When he spoke he exuded power and confidence. His clothes were expensively tailored. “Yes, I said I loved you, please Julian please allow me to explain my actions, if you still hate me after I will understand and will never bother you or your family again. Please allow me to tell my tale.” Julian wanted to run through those double doors back to the safety of his family, he decided against doing so as curiosity got a hold on him. So he sat on one of the chairs and faced his father in anticipation of his story. “Go ahead, I am listening.” Gregory gave a sigh of relief; at least Julian was willing to listen to him. “After, Clara killed Heedi, your mother I threw her out of my home and decided to raise you myself. Julian I kept you for four years before Clara came back into my life. I was weak and foolish for her. Due to loneliness and the fear of dying alone. I courted other women, but I did not feel any sort of closeness to them. So I let her back into my life. I feared for your life as I knew she was dangerous and may have harmed you. Jules I tried several of my friends and relatives to take you in, alas no one wanted to raise a Mulatto boy in the south. I craved Clara so much that I did the most unforgivable thing; I sold you to Jim O’Connor. I paid him for years as I am sure Harper must have already told you so I could always keep you close to me. Clara never knew of my actions, she assumed I washed my hands of you.” Julian stood up and went to the windows and looked out. Everyone passing by seemed so at peace within themselves, birds were chirping, children were playing. Everyone and everything seem so happy, but here I am suffering and reliving one of the most painful periods in my life. He was weeping and he felt a hand on his shoulders. He spun around and saw that it was Gregory; Julian stormed through the doors, and got into his carriage. Gregory raced through the doors. “Julian, please come back, I don’t want you to leave.” Julian who was still weeping whispered his words. “Gregory, I am twenty-seven years old. It’s too late to ask for any damn forgiveness. You sold me into hell and I made my way out, with the help of God, my darling Christine and Blake Bach who is more of a father than you ever were. Please, please don’t ever attempt to contact me again. I sorely am not ready to handle you. Please go back to Georgia and leave me be!” “I am no longer living in Georgia; I have bought this mansion here in New York, as I want to be near you. Julian I am never giving up, I need your love and forgiveness and I will keep trying.” Julian did not reply, but drove the carriage away from Gregory’s mansion, hoping never to lay eyes on his father again.
Julian arrived home and found Christine anxiously waiting on him. She ran to him and rained soft kisses on his nose, eyelids and lips. “Sweetheart how was it? What was he like? Have you forgiven him?” “Hmm you are full of so many questions. It was one of the most uncomfortable moments in my life. I met him and hated him even more. I don’t like hating anyone; I just wished he woulda stayed away. I would still be oblivious to his existence. He is so damn arrogant, he assumes, I should forgive him and his selfishness.” Christine worried about the effects of Gregory’s appearance on Julian. He was a wreck; he seems to have lost his confidence and his assertiveness. Never have I seen Jules, so unsure of himself. “Julian, I want you to pray about this. I know we haven’t prayed in a while, but I know that God will help us, He has helped us and stood by our side for years and I know He will not leave us by the wayside now.” They held hands and knelt in prayer. After praying, Julian felt at ease and crawled into bed and slept for a couple hours before he felt Christine kissing him awake. “Hmmm, want to make love I see. I am still weak from seeing Gregory so I may not be at my best tonight.” Christine smiled and rubbed his chest and kissed him again. “Jules, I wish we could, but we can’t. I woke you as Gregory is downstairs. He is insisting on speaking with you.” “What? What is he doing here; I said all that I had to say to him earlier on. I have nothing left.” “Jules, please he is most distressed, please we prayed for you to forgive him. Please try. The children need a grandfather; they are downstairs harassing Gregory and Harper. Will you join them?” “So he has decided to thug at my heart, by using my children. I don’t know why as I have decided to allow him in my life. Just a little now.” Christine shrieked with delight and jumped on top of Julian. “Julian, I am so proud of you. What changed your mind?” “Gregory is not in the clear yet. I just thought that even though what he did was reprehensible, he never fully abandoned me. Plus hate is an unnecessary emotion, it only ages you and makes you feel empty inside. I will be cautious though as I don’t want to get too emotionally attached. Who knows he might abandon me again.” “God I will strangle him if he ever does that again. I will tell him you will be down shortly.” Julian came down the stairs and found the boys both seated on Gregory’s lap. God they look so comfortable he thought, I wonder if he held me in that manner as he is doing now. Christine spoke, “Boys, let’s go poppa wants to speak with Mr. Livingston alone. March along now.” “Momma why does he have the same name as us?” Joshua said. “Your poppa and I will tell you in a while, come lets go.” The boys chorused, “Bye Mr. Livingston!” Gregory smiled and said, “Bye little darlings, see you soon.” They both raced up the stairs with Christine following behind. “Julian, you have a wonderful, beautiful family. I hope you will give me the opportunity to become a member too.” “Don’t you dare. Why are you here? I thought we said all we had to say a few hours ago.” Gregory stood up and walked over to Julian; he held his shoulders and looked into his eyes. “As I said earlier, my son I will never give up. I will keep on trying to win your forgiveness and love. You had better get used to seeing me around.” Julian walked away from Gregory and sat beside Harper. He pursed his lips together and winked at Harper, who looked puzzled by Julian’s gesture. “Well it so happens Gregory, that I have prayed for the strength to forgive you or at least let you be a part of my life.” He paused and smiled to himself. “Well were your prayers answered Jules, were they?” Julian hugged his body and stood facing Gregory. “Yes they were. Gregory I will let you in my life,
but
only one day at a time. Just one day at a time.” Gregory was so happy; he almost skipped over to Julian and hugged him. “I am happy; I promise you I will never, ever leave you again. I will be patient and anytime you want to spend time with me. I will be available.” They were distracted by Harper’s sobbing; Julian knelt before him and asked. “Harper are you okay?” Between sniffles Harper said, “Today is the most wonderful day. I have witnessed a miracle. All of Gregory’s prayers have been answered, today is truly a blessed day!” “Harper, it’s all because of you, I probably would never agreed to see poppa--” Julian was surprised, he called Gregory poppa. It felt so good saying that. “If you hadn’t convinced me to do so.” He went over to Gregory and hugged him for a few minutes, between sobs he said, “I want to formally introduce you to my family.”
Julian opened the door to the study and yelled for Christine and the boys. “Joshua and Julian could you both come by my side? I want to introduce you to someone you will be seeing a lot of. This is Gregory Livingston, my poppa and your grandfather. Go and say hello.” Joshua ran to Gregory and kissed him. “Oh I have a grand-pa, I am happy as you are so nice to us. Are you coming to live with us?” Julian was surprised by Joshua’s openness with Gregory as the child was shy and does not practice speaking with strangers. Perhaps Gregory does have a good heart after all. “No my son, but I will be nearby and I will be more than happy to be your grand-pa.” Julian brought Julian Jr. to Gregory as the child hid behind his leg. Gregory lifted him and spun around with him. “Please don’t be shy; I am your grand-pa. Oh okay don’t pout, I think he wants his momma.” “And last by no means least, please meet Christine my wife.” “Wow, I have one thing to take credit for; you have inherited my taste for exquisite women. Jules your mother was an extremely beautiful woman. You have her eyes, I have a portrait of her, and I must show it to you sometime.” “I want you to tell me about her as well. I need to know who she was.” “I will tell you anytime you are ready.” Harper said, “I am sorry to cut this visit short, but Gregory we have to prepare to meet with the purchasers of your holdings in Europe. Remember they are meeting us for dinner shortly.” “Oh, I almost forgot, Julian do you mind if I left now?” “I don’t, just please don’t pull another disappearing act, please.” Gregory hugged Julian and kissed the sides of his face. “Julian, I was weak and foolish before, I will never ever leave you again. I must take leave now. Where are Christine and the children?” “We are right here Gregory. It was so good to finally meet you. Before you go I must thank you. Thank you for helping to create Jules, who is the most wonderful person in this whole world. I hope we will get to know each other as time goes by.” “Why you are welcomed, and I am so happy to meet the woman who has loved and cherished my son, through these years.” Gregory and Harper went through the doors; Julian stood and watched until their carriage disappeared. He went upstairs to Christine who was already in bed awaiting him. “Christine, I am so happy to finally bury my hate for poppa. God it feels so good saying that. I can’t wait for him to tell me about momma.” “Come here my darling. I am so delighted for you. I hope Gregory lives up to his promise, never to abandon you again. He seems sincere; I only hope he truly is.” Julian snuggled with Christine until they both fell into a deep and restful sleep.