Christmas Delights 3 (40 page)

"Goodnight then." Daniel stepped into the room and
away from Riley, shutting the door on whatever response he got.

Daniel fell onto the bed without undressing. His mind
replayed the look on Riley's face as Daniel had turned away from him. The look
of disappointment and rejection. Why did Riley look like that? Did Riley really
want to kiss him, or were Daniel's own feelings of attraction confusing him
into seeing things that weren't really there? What would Riley have done if
Daniel had kissed him? Part of him wished he'd done it and found out. But he'd
made that mistake before and lost Riley. He couldn't stand the thought of it
happening again. Daniel felt lost and confused as he slipped into a restless
sleep.

* * * * *

The aroma of coffee filled the air around Daniel as he
awoke. His limbs were stiff and his eyelids heavy. He stretched, hoping to
force some energy into his tired muscles. He was confused for a moment. He
wasn't where he was supposed to be this morning. As the disorientation subsided
and he remembered he was in Riley's apartment, his anxiety rose. Would Riley be
awkward around him this morning? Or could they go back to the easy atmosphere
they'd shared in the airport? Daniel forced a smile as he left the bedroom to
find out. He could get through a couple of hours with Riley. He'd be fine.

"Merry Christmas." Riley smiled at Daniel over the
top of his cup.

Daniel's resolve to stay calm was smashed to pieces as he
looked over to where Riley leaned against the kitchen table, wearing nothing
but a pair of low slung jeans. A bead of water fell from his wet hair and
slowly rolled over his bare collar bone. Daniel followed its progress. When the
droplet disappeared into a thin covering of dark hair on Riley's chest, Daniel
flushed. His cheeks grew hot as he looked up. Riley smiled at him before
pushing away from the table and walking over to the coffee pot on the counter.
Daniel was wrong. He wasn't going to make it through a minute with Riley. The
next few hours were going to be torture.

"Oh yeah, Merry Christmas." Daniel said to Riley's
ass. Shaking his head, he sat down at the table. 

Riley handed Danny a mug of black coffee. "Sorry, I'm
out of milk. So, we've got a couple of hours to kill before we can call the
airport. I thought breakfast first and we could watch a film? I don't have much
in the way of food but I think there's some eggs in the fridge. Omelets suit
you?"

Daniel's stomach growled loudly at the mention of food. He
laughed. "Yeah. Any food sounds good at this point. But can I get a shower
first?"

"Yeah sure. There's a towel on the rack in the
bathroom. I'll cook the eggs while you freshen up."

When Daniel returned to the kitchen ten minutes later Riley
had put a top on, with the sight of him in a tight v-neck only slightly less
distracting than his bare chest had been. Daniel managed to ignore the urge to
run his hands over Riley's exposed biceps as they ate by keeping his eyes fixed
on his food. He racked his brains for something to talk about to occupy his
brain.

"So, what's with the beard?" He needed to work on
his small talk.

"Huh?" Riley held his forkful of eggs half way to
his mouth.

"The beard. I mean it's nice and all but it's not your
usual look is it?"

Riley put his fork down and smiled. "How'd you know
what my usual look is?"

Oh, crap. Busted. "I... I watch the show sometimes.
Y'know, it's sometimes on when I'm in the room and I..." Fuck. He wasn't
helping his cause.

Riley's smile grew teasing. "Yeah, yeah. If I had a
dollar for every time someone started a sentence with 'I don't watch the show
but...' I'd have a lot of dollars by now." He winked and stroked his thumb
across his jaw. "You're right. I don't usually look like this. It's for my
latest storyline. That's why I'm here in Denver so late, filming overran. Been
lost in the mountains a while. Got a big cliffhanger over whether I survive
coming up."

Daniel wasn't sure what to say in response. He kept his
mouth shut to avoid telling Riley how hot he looked with a beard.

Riley stage whispered, "I survive. That's off the
record by the way. I better not read that in your paper next week."

"Your secret's safe with me. Scout's honor."
Daniel raised his hand in salute.

Riley laughed. "You were never in the scouts and that
was the wrong hand gesture."

They finished their breakfasts in amiable silence.

Daniel offered to do the dishes as Riley had cooked. Riley
agreed but insisted on helping. They cleaned up and settled onto the
uncomfortable sofa to watch Home Alone. Daniel hated the film, he always had.
Riley must have forgotten all of the times he'd moaned about having to watch it
with his sister when they were kids.

The first time Daniel caught Riley staring at him he ignored
the tingle of lust in his groin and turned back to the TV. When he looked up
again Riley was still looking at him. "What?" He asked. "Do I
have egg on my face or something?"

"No. I just…I don't know. This is nice. I missed you
Danny." He placed a hand on Daniel's thigh. Leaning over slowly, he moved
in for a kiss. Daniel was stunned at the soft press of lips against his own.
But the warmth of Riley's mouth was inviting and familiar. Daniel let the kiss
linger without thinking about what he was doing. Then the slick heat of Riley's
tongue surprised him, and his attention snapped back to what was happening.

The warm attraction and contentment that had settled over
Daniel disappeared. In its place anger built. He knocked Riley's hand away and
stood up. "No!"

He clenched his fists and took a steadying breath in through
his nose. He paced away from Riley. Keeping his back to Riley he spoke again,
not shouting though he wanted to. "You missed me? Is that a joke? You
missed me?"

He heard the squeak of leather as Riley stood, then the soft
shuffle of bare feet against the wooden floor. He felt Riley stop behind him.
"Danny."

"No. Fuck you. You don't get to tell me you missed me.
And you sure as hell don't get to kiss me. You left Riley. You left, not me.
You." Despite his efforts, the last words were shouted. The anger at
hearing Riley calmly telling Daniel he had missed him made Daniel's chest
heave.

"Danny." Riley put a hand on Daniel's shoulder.
Daniel wanted to shrug it off. At the same time he had craved that touch from
Riley for so long. Even through his anger he couldn't bear to lose it.
"Danny, I'm sorry. I never wanted this. I miss you. Can we talk about
this? About before? I need you to let me fix this. Please, Danny."

Daniel was sure that nothing Riley had to say to him could
fix the past. They were broken because Daniel had got it wrong and kissed his
best friend. That's what Daniel had believed for the past seven years. But
Riley had just kissed him. What did that mean? Daniel didn't know. He couldn't
wrap his brain around the fact that maybe Riley hadn't been repulsed by the
kiss back then. None of it made sense. Why had Riley cut off contact if he
liked Daniel? Daniel scrubbed his hands over his face. He needed to let Riley
talk.

"Okay." Daniel turned to face Riley.
"Okay."

Riley moved back to the couch. He perched on the edge,
elbows on his knees as his hands raked through his hair until it formed an
unruly mess. He turned to Daniel, opening his mouth to speak but then shutting
it again. He sighed heavily. "Will you sit down? Please."

Daniel did. He sat on the chair next to Riley, careful not
to let their legs touch. He stared straight ahead. He didn't want to look at
Riley as he spoke. He needed to take in his words without the distraction of
how defeated Riley looked.

"Okay, I need to explain. First off, Danny, and I need
you to know this, I didn't stop talking to you because of the kiss. That kiss
was... It was perfect."

Daniel huffed out a disbelieving laugh.

"Well no, maybe not perfect. Not the kiss itself. But I
wanted it. I wanted you. You had to know that right? That's why you kissed me?
You felt what we had, it wasn't just friendship."

Daniel didn't respond. What could he say? He nodded in
agreement.

"But I was leaving. It was my big break. Jesus, a part in
a soap, D. Getting paid to act, it was my dream. You know that. I couldn't turn
it down."

Daniel looked up as Riley's knee nudged his own. He was
right, Daniel knew Riley needed that job. And look at him now. He had a
starring role in a major network show. Riley had made the right decision.

"That doesn't explain why you cut me out, Riley. You
were my best friend and even if you didn't want any more than that," he
stopped talking and shook his head. "Even if you didn't want me like I
wanted you, wasn't our friendship worth keeping?"

Riley nodded. "I was wrong. I thought it was for the
best. I knew that if I talked to you I'd miss you even more. God, I thought
that if I just forgot about you..."

They sat in silence. Daniel swallowed down the anger and the
hurt. He wanted to tell Riley that he hated him. It would have been a lie. He
had never hated Riley.

"Did it work? Did you forget about me?"

"No."

It should have made Daniel feel better, knowing that Riley
still thought about him. It didn't. He felt his eyes start to sting and he
closed them against the tears. He wasn't going to cry.

Riley said "When I got to L.A. I hated it. I wanted to
come home. I missed my family, but I missed you more. I wanted to call you and
tell you to join me. How fuckin' selfish is that? I wanted you to pack up and
move across the country because I was lonely."

"I would have come. I would have been there in a
heartbeat." Daniel had thought about it when Riley found out he'd got the
part. He daydreamed about them moving out to California together. Riley would
do his acting and Daniel would get some crappy job doing god-knows-what. He'd
have been happy though. They would have been together.

"I know you would have. That's why I couldn't call you.
You had your college place and your own ambitions. It might have worked for a
bit but, long term, you'd have hated me." Riley looked up to the ceiling.
"And I wasn't out then. Hell, I'm not out now. My agent back then was so
against me admitting I was gay. Told me that coming out so early in my career
was a bad idea. Now, I think it'd be fine. The producers at Rocksfall know and
they haven't killed my character off. I just haven't made any big
announcements."

Daniel turned to face Riley. He reached up to brush his
thumb against the coarse hair on Riley's cheek. He felt sick and guilty but he
had to tell Riley that he wasn't the only selfish jerk. "I missed you like
hell. And when you wouldn't return my calls or my emails I was so angry. I
wanted to hate you. Sometimes it felt like I did hate you. I hoped you'd fail.
I used to wish that the show would get cancelled, or that they'd sack you and
you'd have to come home. What kind of person wishes failure on his
friends?"

Riley pushed into the touch of Daniel's hand. "It's
okay."

"It's not. I didn't just want you home. Sometimes I
just wanted you to fail so you'd be as miserable as me. I thought if you came
back a failure you'd want to be friends, even if you didn't want more than
that."

Daniel watched as Riley kissed the pad of his thumb. Riley's
voice shook as he said, "I always wanted you. I was just too stupid to see
that pushing you away was the worst thing I could do. Out of sight, out of mind
is a god-damned lie."

Daniel moved his thumb to rub over Riley's bottom lip.
Pushing his fingers through the hair on Riley's neck he pulled Riley towards
him. Their mouths hovered close as Riley whispered, "I was so fucking
dumb." Daniel shook his head before he closed the gap and kissed him.

The kiss was tentative and slow, their lips barely moving as
they learned the feel of one another. Relief washed over Daniel as he kissed
Riley without fear of rejection. When Riley had kissed him earlier he was too
shocked to respond. This time he savored the warm sweet taste of Riley as their
tongues brushed. Riley leaned into Daniel's body, tipping him back against the
arm of the couch. He pressed their bodies together as he crawled over Daniel.
Daniel groaned and pulled Riley in closer, their crotches rubbing together
creating a delicious friction. Daniel was more turned on than during any
fantasy he'd had about Riley. They moved awkwardly but quickly to shed their
shirts. The leather of the couch a cold shock to Daniel as his skin was exposed.

Daniel watched how beautifully the muscles in Riley's chest
and arms tensed as he pushed up on his elbows to slide his body against Daniel.
Riley smiled as he looked down between them. "You don't know how often I
thought about this Danny." He moved an arm between them to undo the clasp
of Daniel's belt.

Daniel tilted his hips into the touch. He needed Riley. His
body ached with the desire to be touched by him. He stretched up to bite at the
flesh of Riley's shoulder, earning a groan of appreciation in return. Riley
worked one-handed to ease open Daniel's jeans. He struggled as he balanced over
Daniel, who reached his own hand down to help. He raised his hips as they
pushed the denim down Daniel's thighs.. Riley took Daniel's cock in his hand
and stroked him. His touch was light, slowly building Daniel's pleasure but not
enough to get him off.

Daniel closed his eyes. He gave himself over to the
sensations strumming through his body. He felt Riley's mouth on his throat,
moving with gentle kisses and tantalizing licks. The stubble on Riley's jaw
scraped at Daniel's skin. Daniel ran his fingers up Riley's back and into his
hair. He tugged gently on the curls at the nape of Riley's neck in
encouragement. "Feels so good."

Riley hummed in agreement against the skin under Daniel's
ear. He nipped at the lobe with his teeth, then laved the sensitive skin with
his tongue. Daniel turned to kiss Riley. The gentle slide of their lips gave
way to heated roughness. Daniel rubbed his leg against Riley's erection. He broke
their kiss and pushed Riley up and away from him. "Get those jeans off,
Riley."