Cloudburst (41 page)

“What's happening?”

She stopped in front of me. “I want him out of the house. After what he tried to do to you, he put up no resistance.”

“Where's he going?”

“I don't care. If he wants to come back for anything after this, he has to call first to let us know. It's either this or I call the police and have you talk to them.”

Of course, she was right to be in a rage. I was still more frightened than angry about it. Jordan looked at my face.

“Don't you get like some of these women who find a reason to blame themselves. You did nothing to encourage this, Sasha. I had a bad feeling about his attitude toward you when he bought you that expensive necklace and talked about taking you places. As it turns out, he was unable, if I'm to believe him, to get three tickets to the concert he wanted to take us to. Remember that? Turns out that there were only two tickets, and guess who would be left home?”

She looked toward the stairway.

“It's his way,” she said. “He often cut me out of things after Alena's death. He was always taking Kiera here and there and coming up with reasons why I couldn't or shouldn't go along. He gave Kiera plenty of expensive presents, too.”

What was she saying?

“But surely, you don't think . . .”

“I don't put anything past him,” she said. “I'll send Mrs. Duval up with your breakfast.”

“No. I'd rather get dressed and go down,” I said.

“Good. Neither of us will be sickly, pathetic, and weak now.”

She walked off with a determined gait, the anger, grit, and fortitude so evident that I thought I could see it floating down through her legs to strengthen each step she took. My mind was spinning because of the speed with which everything was happening. It was as if I was in a real California earthquake, only in this one, the trembling was coming out of my heart, where the fault line had always been.

I closed the door and hurried to shower and dress. Just before I went down to breakfast, I paused at my computer. Maybe I did have Mrs. Caro's sixth sense. I turned it on and waited for my e-mail to show. There were a number of messages from the girls at school, three from Jessica alone, of course, but there it was, Kiera's.

I highlighted it and went to it.

Like before, it was short and nasty.

I bet you're happy now.

20
Recovery

O
ne of the first things Jordan decided to do was literally take over Donald's office. She was in there first thing in the morning to begin her education. She wanted to be as intelligent as she could be whenever it came to any aspect of their fortune. I went in to watch her after breakfast. She had papers piled on the desk and was sorting them out in separate piles on one of the tables. As she worked, she mumbled to herself. Finally, she realized I was there, too.

“Oh. Did you have breakfast?”

“Yes.”

She looked around. “I can tell you this, Sasha. I am not going to be one of those weak, pathetic women who look like terrified, injured kittens when the whole thing is over. And if one more of my so-called friends tells me how sorry she is for me, I'll scream so loudly in the phone that it will break her eardrum. Feel sorry for Donald, I'll tell her. He's the pathetic creature, not me.”

She paused, seeing the look of shock on my face. I
had never seen her this intense. I hoped her anger wasn't making her so crazy that Donald would get the better of her.

“Sorry I'm shouting,” she said, and sat hard in the desk chair. “You know, I actually found some names and numbers of the girls he was seeing in different parts of the country. They were right here in his top drawer. How's that for chutzpah? You know what that is?”

“Bold, nervy?”

She smiled and took a deep breath, finally calming herself a bit. “Seems like you're in the middle of a hurricane, I know. I am sorry about that,” she said. “I really am.”

“I don't see how you could be blamed for anything.” I hesitated and then decided to say it. “Besides, Kiera is already blaming me.”

“What do you mean?”

“She sent me a one-sentence e-mail this morning.”

“Which was?”

“ ‘I bet you're happy now.' ”

Jordan lowered her head to think a moment and then looked up. “I don't know what I'll do about her now. She's old enough to make her own decisions legally, and she has quite a trust fund that Donald insisted she be able to access when she was twenty-one, even though we knew she would not be finished with college, if she ever finishes. Now that I no longer want to be the obedient little rich wife and mother, I feel obligated to make her see how imperfect her supposedly perfect father is. I gave in too quickly on everything, and I felt sorry for Donald, too, after we lost Alena. I
guess I let him get away with far too much. He took advantage of my sympathy.

“I am sorry now about the way he treated Ryder Garfield,” she continued. “Perhaps if I had been more sympathetic to Ryder's problems, none of this might have happened.”

“You did what you thought was right,” I said. “Anyway, you shouldn't blame yourself.”

I thought I knew what was bothering her. It was understandable.

“When you called Kiera and spoke to her roommate, you couldn't keep that information from Ryder's parents. It would have been irresponsible of you, maybe even illegal.”

“Excuse me?” she said, pulling herself back in the chair. “Kiera's roommate? When did Kiera get a roommate? She had such trouble with the girls in her dorm ever since she was enrolled that I didn't think she would ever get another roommate.”

“But she went to Europe with them last summer.”

“No, she didn't go to Europe with them. She went on a group trip Donald arranged to match the one the school was doing. Did she tell you something different?”

“She has to have a roommate now,” I insisted. “Whom did you speak with when you called looking for us?”

“I never called, Sasha. I don't understand what you're saying. I thought you knew what had happened.”

I felt the blood draining from my face.

“Oh, my God,” Jordan said, realizing. “Kiera told you I called?”

I nodded. “What did happen, then?” I asked.

“Kiera called Donald and told him she had just found out that Ryder Garfield was going to meet you at the motel. She claimed she knew nothing about it and didn't want him blaming her. She told him exactly where you were, room number and all, and said she was sorry she had planned this special outing. She had been expecting it to be only you and her.

“He called me immediately, raging about it. He said he called Dr. Steiner to see if Ryder had indeed left the school. She had just discovered that he had and had just called his parents. Donald told her exactly where Ryder was going, and Dr. Steiner called his parents with the information.

“Of course, I don't think any of us imagined that Ryder would be so distraught that he would take his own life. No matter what was going on in that family, no parent would want to lose a child that way.”

I really thought for a moment that I had lost the ability to move, even to swallow.

“You knew how adamant Donald was about it all,” she continued. “Of course, I wonder now what really motivated him, just as I wondered what truly motivated him to buy you that expensive necklace.”

“I don't want it,” I said. “Sell it, and give the money to some charity, to the homeless.”

She did look different behind Donald's desk; she did look stronger, and that took the trembling out of my body.

“What are you going to do today?” she asked as I started out of the office.

I thought a moment. “Get off my knees. I'm not making and selling lanyards anymore.”

I didn't elaborate to take the look of confusion off her face. That would have to come later, I thought, and went upstairs to get my things together.

I wrote a note for Jordan, explaining that I wouldn't be able to have dinner with her. I asked her not to worry about me and pinned the note to the outside of my door, and then I left the house quietly. Alberto had parked my car in the garage the day Donald had picked me up at school. As unobtrusively as I could, I got in, started it up, and drove away. A short time later, I was on the freeway heading north to Kiera's school.

There is an old saying Donald actually uses.
Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.

In the back of my mind, I could hear my mother softly chastising me.

“Remember the safety valve? Remember being skeptical? Remember me telling you that the world is divided into two kinds of people, the gullible and the deceptive? It's only good and sensible self-defense to be distrusting and a little deceptive yourself. This isn't paradise yet. We're always in one danger or another, no matter where we are. Remember all that?”

“Yes, Mama, I do,” I said. “I was a fool.”

After nearly two hours, my cell phone rang. I saw that it was Jordan, but I didn't answer it. She would only ask me to turn around and come home. I knew she would be angry and disappointed in me, but I was as determined to do what I had to do as she was determined to do what she had to do. I hoped she would understand.

It started to rain, which made driving more difficult on the freeway. When I was taking driving lessons, my instructor always groaned at the sight of rain and went into a tirade about how people here didn't know how to drive in the rain. They didn't slow down, and they could easily lose control because the roads could get as slippery as roads with ice.

“Stay farther back,” he'd advise.

The one thing I didn't want to happen now was a car accident. I heard his warning and dropped my speed. It was dreary and slow for the next two hours, and then the rain stopped and the clouds began breaking up. Weather changes in this part of California could come quickly. When I reached dry road, I sped up. I wanted to get there before it was dark.

Kiera's college had a population that wasn't much larger than the student body at Pacifica. All her life, she had enjoyed special treatment in ideal places. Her college reeked of privilege and wealth. Set off the main road in a beautiful rustic area with Monterey pine trees and perfect manicured grounds of rich green grass and flower beds and fountains, the college had two main buildings for classrooms and administration. To the left and right of them were the dorms. All of them looked like real residences, with pretty shutters, arched windows, and soft, light blue siding. There were walkways and bicycle paths linking every structure. Right now, young men and women were walking and talking, riding their bikes, or just sitting on the benches to get the last warm rays of a retreating sun. I saw the parking spaces for guests and pulled into one.

When I stepped out, there were two women who looked more like teachers than students walking by. I asked for directions to Kiera's dorm and headed toward it quickly. When I walked in, there were four girls in the small lobby talking. It looked as if they had all just returned from classes. They still carried books. Everyone turned to look at me.

“Hi,” I said. “I'm looking for Kiera March.”

“Try any rock outside,” a tall, dark-haired girl said. They all laughed.

“Excuse me?”

“She's usually under a rock,” the girl next to the dark-haired girl said. Everyone smiled.

“Well, right now, she might be in her room,” I said. “Which way, please?”

“Just take the stairway on your right,” a girl with pretty light red hair and green eyes said. “Her room is the first on the left upstairs. You can't miss it. On the door, she has a sign that says ‘Keep Out.' ”

“Yeah, like anyone would want to go in,” the tall girl said. They all widened their smiles.

“Really, do you know if she's here?”

“We don't keep track of her,” the redhaired girl said softly.

I started to walk toward the stairway and stopped, turning back to them. “Why do you all dislike her so much?” I asked.