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Emma of course, is convinced that Zayne is just 'hooking up' with me and that he is not a man capable of a relationship. While I whole heartily agree with her, it still sucks hearing that other people view him the same way. Not that Emma knows him well but it doesn't take being around Zayne a lot to know that he is as much off limits to women as a devoted married man is, unless you just want hot sex of course. That much he can do.

While I have missed Zayne incredibly and it has taken everything I have not to pick up the phone and call him, I have enjoyed my time with Emma and Carver. It's the first time since this whole Zayne fiasco started that I have just been able to hang out with them.

Unfortunately for me,  Emma has a show tonight and Carver has a date, which leaves me friendless for the night. Apparently the red head from
Serenity
is good for more than dry humping on a dance floor and her and Carver have seen each other a couple of times since that night.

While I am happy that Carver has found someone that he really seems to like and that Em is out living her dream, sitting at home alone on a Friday night is a recipe for disaster. I have to keep myself busy. At least I recognize this. And while crying into a tub of ice cream all night sounds appealing, I refuse to let myself go there. Admitting how far I have fallen for the one man I can't have is not something I want to dwell on.

No. I need to get out. Try to move on with my life. I have to learn to accept that either I put Zayne behind me or I settle for what I can have; a loveless relationship where the other party continues to sleep with other women. Either way I lose but at least walking away now lets me keep a little bit of my dignity in tact. Because even if Zayne wants whatever this is to continue, I know that my heart is too far in it now to accept any less than all of him.

I text Becca to see what she's up to tonight and get a response within minutes. Apparently
Saving Solice
is playing at
Vitos
tonight and while Jake and Pat are manning the bar, Becca is hanging out in case they need an extra hand. I guess this band has a pretty big local following and draws in quite the crowd.

Deciding that my options are otherwise very limited, I settle on heading over and keeping Becca company. I throw on a pair of ripped jeans partnered with a black fitted tank that has rips and tears purposely placed across it. It shows just enough flashes of skin to be sexy but not too much that it's overly revealing or shows off anything I don't want it to. I leave my hair down and complete the look with smoky eyes and a light layer of mascara. Nothing too over the top but dramatic enough that I will fit right in with the rock crowd that typically frequents
Vitos
.

I walk through the doors not fifteen minutes later and am completely floored by the amount of people that are here. Certainly they must be violating at least five fire code rules, the biggest being well over capacity. People are jammed inside the little bar standing shoulder to shoulder, most crowded around the small stage where the band has already started their set.

From what I have learned from Becca,
Saving Solice
plays a combination of covers and originals, making sure they keep the crowd interested and involved. Right now Seether's version of “Careless Whisper” is blaring from the stage. I can't see the band but the lead singers voice is like pure silk. Smooth and deep with just enough rasp to make it sexy as hell.

After squeezing through the small space and rubbing my body up against more people than I care to think about in the process, I finally spot Becca at the end of the bar. Per her usual garb, she's dressed in a black and red plaid skirt and a black shirt that dips so low in the back, it's more like half a shirt and her almost entirely tattooed back is on full display.

She gives me a bright smile when she catches sight of me and immediately stands from her stool to pull me into a friendly hug. “This is crazy.” I yell over the music, gesturing around the bar. “Poor guys.” I say, pointing towards Jake and Pat who are frantically trying to keep up with the amount of drink orders pouring in, not only from the bar but from the two waitresses working the floor as well.

“Bullshit! They are making bank!” Becca says, swiping her hand through the air. “Lucky bastards. I would have loved to work tonight but Pat was already scheduled.” She says, pinning her eyes on Jake, clearly unhappy that her relationship with him didn't earn her at least a little bit of favoritism.

I shake my head at her and turn my attention back to the bar. I catch Pat's attention first and after filling three martini glasses full of some bright red liquid, he saunters over to me, giving me what he thinks is his panty dropping smile before asking what he can get for me.

I have only met Pat one other time when he stopped by during one of my sets. He typically only works the weekends. While he's not ugly by any means, he definitely is not the hunk he thinks he is. He's rather short for a guy and extremely stocky. Not fat, just really broad. His light brown hair can only be described as wanna be Edward Cullen hair, and while he thinks his muscle shirts are sexy, they're actually quite the opposite.

Regardless, once you get past his obnoxious cockiness, he's not so bad. “You playing for us tonight?” He asks, nodding his head towards the stage.

“Not a chance.” I say, again practically yelling so I can be heard over the band.

“Pick your poison.” He smiles, stepping back to gesture around the bar. “Of course I could always make you a Patgasm.” He says, his smile verging on wicked.

“Trust me, you don't want anywhere near that.” Becca laughs beside me. “Give us two shots of tequila and two Vodka and Cranberry tall.” She says, shooing him away with her hands.

“Thank you.” I say, grateful that she stepped in. Again, I have only been around Pat once but in that short time frame I learned quite a bit about him. While I think most of it is an act, some of it is just how he is. He's crude and sexual and I swear he thinks that every woman wants to sleep with him. I couldn't keep up with how many times he hinted that we leave and head back to his place in the roughly one hour I spent with him prior to tonight.

He drops our drinks off within minutes and then hurries away to serve a large group of women that have managed to squeeze their way to the bar. Becca raises her shot glass and clinks it with mine, winking before pouring the liquid down her throat. I smile widely at her and then follow suit, the bite from the tequila causing an involuntary shudder to run through my body.

Jake refills our shots almost immediately and we repeat the process again, twice, before Becca convinces me to join her on the dance floor. Having eaten next to nothing today, I can feel the tequila already working it's magic, going straight to my head almost the second my feet hit the floor.

I let Becca pull me through the crowd to the very edge of the small dance floor before stopping. My eyes immediately fall to the stage and having not checked out the band before now, my jaw practically hits the floor when my eyes fall on the lead singer.

He is down right hot. Like rock star hot. He runs his hand through his shaggy blonde hair as he belts out the lyrics to a song I can only guess is an original. His handsome face is covered lightly in stubble like he hasn't shaved in three or four days and really makes the sharp features of his jaw stand out. His tall, lean body is dressed in tattered, worn jeans and an old vintage Nirvana t-shirt. One muscled arm is completely sleeved in various tattoos while the other is completely bare.

While I love the rocker bad boy as much as the next girl, I've never really thought of them as my type. But this man, well this man could very well change my mind in that regard. Or at least maybe he could if a certain perfect god-like man didn't already occupy every fiber in my entire body. And just like that, Zayne comes flooding back into my mind.

Becca nudges me in the side and then cocks her head towards the stage when I catch her eyes, clearly not missing the way I am so obviously checking out the singer. She fans herself with her hand, indicating she thinks so too and then smiles widely at me, pulling me onto the dance floor.

After three songs of being packed tightly in a cluster of people, my entire body is dripping in sweat and I leave Becca on the dance floor to return to the bar for something to drink. It takes almost ten minutes before Jake has a chance to grab me another Vodka and Cranberry by which time the band announces that they are taking a twenty minute break. Like clock work, background music clicks on, filling the noisy bar.

With all the people from the dance floor now making their way to the bar, Jake and Pat get even more slammed with orders. Just as I am about to offer to jump in, Becca climbs on top of the bar and jumps down behind it. She fills two shot glasses and hands one across the bar to me. We both laugh and then drink our shots before she makes her way to the other end of the bar to fill the waitresses orders.

Not really having much to do, I watch Becca behind the bar. There is something so beautiful about the way her and Jake interact with one another. He will pass by her and brush his shoulder so slightly against hers or brush his fingertips across her arm while reaching across her to grab a bottle. You would have to really be paying attention to notice that it's intentional and I don't miss the way she does the same things to him. Grazing her fingers with his as they both reach for a glass. Trailing her hand across his back as she passes behind him. Every touch I watch, I see the affection in it. I can't believe I never noticed it before but it's clear to me now. These two aren't just dating, they are completely in love with one another.

“Just about makes you sick doesn't it?” An accented voice fills my ears and I jump slightly, having been in kind of a daze. When my eyes fall to the man next to me, I swear my jaw must be on the bar. It's the lead singer from the band and not only is he hot as sin but he also has an accent and one that I didn't pick up on in the slightest while he was on stage.

“I'm sorry what?” I ask, having no idea what he's talking about. He smiles widely at me and then gestures his beer bottle towards where Jake and Becca are standing next to the register.

“Kind of makes your stomach turn a bit doesn't it? Watching them two. At least they are more subtle about it these days. When they first met they couldn't keep their hands off each other and I'm not talking about little touches here and there. I'm talking about practically getting it on behind the damn bar.” He laughs, taking a drink of his beer.

“Well, glad I missed that.” I say, taking a sip of my drink as well, not really sure what else to do.

“I'm Thad by the way.” He says, sitting down his beer to extend his hand to me. I smile and take it, giving it a light shake before pulling my fingers from his grip.

“Thad?” I question. Having never really heard the name before and being just buzzed enough that I feel the need to question him about it.

“Thaddeus.” He clarifies. “But now that's not very rock star is it?” He laughs.

“No I guess not.” I agree. “I'm Grace. I'm sorry but where are you from?” I ask, not being able to pinpoint the accent.

“Ireland.” He replies with a smile. “Moved to the states about four years ago and just can't bring myself to go back.”

“New York will do that to you.” I say, shrugging casually.

“You come here often?” He asks. Not like a cheesy pick up line way but more just seeming curious.

“Four nights a week.” I say, laughing when his eyebrows shoot up in question. “No, I don't have a drinking problem. I play here, Sunday through Wednesday.” I say, taking another drink.

“Grace Morgan? You mean to tell me I am sitting with
The
Grace Morgan.” He teases. “Seriously though, Jake's told me tons about you. From what I gather you are quite talented. Though I would like to hear you first before I give my two cents.” He says, nudging his shoulder against mine.

“Well now you know where to find me.” I sigh, faking annoyance. He let's out a full belly laugh, his chocolate brown eyes sparkling at me.

“I like you Grace Morgan.” He says, draining the contents of his beer and setting the empty bottle on the bar before standing. “But I am a very impatient person. Come on.” He says, holding out his hand to me.

“What?” I look from his eyes to his hand and then back to his eyes. Realizing my confusion he laughs again.

“Come play with me.” He says, his hand still extended to me. I immediately shake my head and lean away from him.

“Oh hell no. I have not had nearly enough alcohol to get in front of a crowd this big.” I say, shaking my head again.

“Shot of tequila and keep them coming.” He hollers to Becca as she passes, causing a huge smile to light up her face. “The night is young love. Drink up.” He rasps in my ear before turning towards the stage and disappearing into the crowd.

––––––––

T
had reappears at my side each time the band takes a break, trying his luck time and time again at getting me to join him on stage. By one in the morning, I am far too drunk for my own good but somehow sober enough that I still feel somewhat in control of myself.

“It's time love.” Thad croons next me, draping his arm across my shoulders. I once again shake my head no and then laugh at the pouty look he gives me. “You won't be up there alone, we will do a duet.” He suggests.

“Nope, not doing it.” I shake my head again.

“Oh come on. Humor me. I'll tell you what... You pick the song, if my band doesn't know it then you're off the hook but if they do, well then your ass is on that stage with me.” He smiles widely at me and I can't help but to return it.

I tap my finger against my chin, thinking entirely too hard about what songs they are likely not to know, finally settling on a country duet that is sure to get him off my back. No way a rock singer from Ireland is going to have any clue what this song even is.

“Easy by Rascal Flatts and Natasha Bedingfield.” I say, not able to contain the smile stretching across my face. I totally got this.